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Life, Living and Loving

He Did What?

I’ve got the writing itch so to help scratch it, I went trolling the web and came across this story:  http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504763_162-57320571-10391704/rugby-jock-says-stroke-turned-him-gay.

I saw this and blinked very slowly; I have learned that a stroke can change you and in some very crazy ways.  I had a stroke (as some of y’all already know) and one of the things I was concerned with was any noticeable change in my personality as well as my ability to think and remember and, oh, yeah, learning how to walk again and trying to be friends with my never-ending pain.  But this guy says when he came to, um, his sexuality changed so I guess I was wrong when I said that you don’t just wake up one day and decide you’re going to be gay, huh?

Doctors are guess that the injury to his brain may have switched something on or, more realistically, unblocked something he wasn’t aware of – but had been in his head the whole time.  People with MD after their names tend to get a little fuzzy about things because while there’s a lot of things we understand about humans, how our brains actually work remains one of mankind’s greatest mysteries.

I know that once you have a stroke, your brain starts to rewire itself, bypassing damaged areas as best it can and, often, restoring functions, like the ability to walk and talk and other stuff like that.  So, yeah, I have reason to believe – and without any real clinical proof – that it’s quite possible that as his brain rebooted and started rewiring itself, it could have very well tapped into a hidden facet of the man’s mind and, uh-oh, he’s now a gay man.

I really don’t mean to make light of this guy’s plight but I remember the hours following my stroke, lying in the ICU and my biggest concern was being able to survive the doses of TPP – the rotor rooter drug – being fed in to me.  I was worried about being alive and functional… and this guy woke up with a craving for men and dick?  Man, that had to be just as hard of a shock to him as being told he had a stroke!  The good thing is that he seems to have adjusted well to his “new” sexuality and, trust me, when you have a stroke and survive it intact for the most part, having a very positive outlook is high up on the menu… because the alternatives aren’t exactly what I’d call pretty.

I’ve either heard or read stories where people have had some sort of insult to their brains… and have had some of the weirdest shit happen as a result, like being able to speak a foreign language like a native… but have never heard the language spoken before.  Or the woman who suffered some injury – born and raised in America – but has an English accent as if she’s lived in the UK all her natural life.

I know it kinda weirds me out to know that my brain could still be rewiring itself some five – almost six – years after my stroke and, well, it creates a weird sense of distrust in that I’m the way I am now… but there might be some road construction going on in my head that might change that in the blink of an eye.  It doesn’t scare me – much – but I do think it’s hilarious to think about myself in these terms since, before the stroke, I had no reason not to trust that three-pound lump of Silly Putty-like stuff crammed inside my head.

I mean, wow, what happened to this guy would be like my brain doing some rewiring and I wake up one morning just knowing that I’m a woman… until I got up to pee, that is.  I mean, I just can’t see myself waking up and wondering where my boobs went and why I have a dick, ya know?  I really and honestly cannot imagine waking up and, okay, I hurt my head… and I’m no longer attracted to women… but that guy who just came in looks damned appetizing!  Again – and despite me poking a little fun at his predicament – I give him some very major props for being able to (1) adjust to the fact that he had a stroke and (2) the person he wound up being because he had the stroke.

Having a stroke all by itself is a motherfucker to deal with; I had the advantage – or disadvantage – of being very aware of what was happening to me just mere seconds before the stroke literally floored me.  I was conscious and very much aware – I had the guys in the ambulance laughing their asses off as they transported me and, to this very day, I really think it was key to my being able to recover as much as I did.  Like I mentioned, I knew I was going to have to learn how to walk again and use my right hand but other than that – and this fucking pain – I was very lucky not to suffer much more than what I did… as far as I know.

Wow… I’ve had a stroke.  I understand a lot about what goes on with you when you have one (and it doesn’t kill you).  I’m still shaking my head over what’s happened to this guy… and perhaps the human brain is much more amazing than we can ever imagine!

About kdaddy23

Not really sure what to say; there's a lot about me that can be said but the basic thing is that I'm just a guy with a lot of things on my mind that I need to get said. I have to add that if you're not old enough to deal with adult issues or you find them offensive, you might want to stay out of my head...


10 thoughts on “He Did What?

  1. I never did read this entire article but I did see the highlights. I’m sorry you’re in pain all the time that’s awful :( but my goodness you’re walking and all fiesty and stuff? All outgoing and talking about all kinds of things! That is a wonderful thing!

    This guy, I kind of thought maybe he was already gay but yes, that the stroke woke something up in him. Who knows… I don’t know. It is all very interesting though, I don’t have much to say but I thought I’d come over and say Hi and make some kind of comment :)


    Posted by mysterycoach | 10 November 2011, 20:45
    • Oh, yeah, I’m just as feisty as ever, thank the good Lord! There’s so much we don’t understand about how our brains do what they do – but I’m glad you came by for a visit just the same!


      Posted by kdaddy23 | 10 November 2011, 21:31
      • So it seems! I mean you’re very verbal and talkative that I can see and outgoing and everything, I mean and I don’t know much about strokes or getting through them or over one either. I definitely agree that there’s just so much we don’t know about our brains. I am learning more and more thinking and how we think is massively important. When I stop reading things and not paying attention, I forget a lot of very good things and that’s no good. I always feel much better when I have things about psychology and tools and things like that in front of me. Makes me feel better.

        You’re welcome! :) And thank you for sharing with me on the topic with my daughter these past couple of days. I appreciate it.


        Posted by mysterycoach | 10 November 2011, 22:21
      • What I’d really love to do is have a conversation with this dude and set him straight about some stuff – man style; I’ve got zero tolerance for asshole boys who think they know what they’re too dumb to know.

        The stroke left me jacked up with the pain and I have a limp and can’t move as fast or as well as I used to; I don’t have the slurred speech or sagging facial features so if I didn’t tell you I had a stroke, you’d probably not guess that I did. The thing you want to know about a stroke is to not ever have one if you can help it. Eat healthy and exercise, of course – but the thing that got me was stress… and you really want to keep your stress down to a dull roar… or else. Bad part is being a parent is not a conducive occupation for the reduction of stress…


        Posted by kdaddy23 | 10 November 2011, 22:41
  2. Yah he needs a male figure around actually. One with a clue really. You know how that goes, just because there’s a man in the house doesn’t mean he’s learning good things or values.

    I am sorry to hear that you’re in pain all the time. Stress. I hear that. I work in a law firm and we can be pretty stressed out that’s for sure. I hear that. LOL “a parent is not a conducive occupation for the reduction of stress”… LOL ! Amen! I do need to get myself in gear and start working out though. I’ve been threatening to but putting it off for no good reason.


    Posted by mysterycoach | 11 November 2011, 05:04
  3. Smells like bullshit to me too.


    Posted by marriagecoach1 | 11 November 2011, 08:49
    • Smells like bullshit… but it may not be. In stroke recovery, one of the things that’s observed greatly is cognitive ability and personality; it’s been well-documented that some stroke victims undergo changes in personality and behavior, depending on which areas of their brains have been affected. That the brain appears to have some ability to rewire itself, it’s possible that during this process, other areas of the brain gets linked together… and maybe something new happens or it doesn’t – neurologists aren’t exactly sure about this and continue to study this in stroke patients and other people who suffer severe head trauma.


      Posted by kdaddy23 | 11 November 2011, 12:44
  4. Well I am familiar with stroke victims as I went to nursing school as well and I have never
    read any studies where after a stroke a victim reverses their sexual orientation.


    Posted by marriagecoach1 | 11 November 2011, 14:54
    • Neither have I; as a stroke victim (interesting way to put this) I have a reason to be interested in the phenomenon – and that I’ve never heard of this particular thing happening is what got my attention. For all anyone knows, this guy’s stroke could have “removed” the block placed on his sexuality… and the thing is that there’s no real proof that it couldn’t happen because, again, that people can undergo changes in personality and behavior is, in itself, very well documented.


      Posted by kdaddy23 | 11 November 2011, 15:00
  5. Well anything is possible I guess but my thought is that it was an excuse on his part to come out.


    Posted by marriagecoach1 | 11 November 2011, 15:05

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