I was clearing out the messages I get from Facebook on my iPod when I saw a newsfeed from the acclaimed urban erotica writer, Zane where some chick has been married to a guy she says is wonderful for 2.5 years… and she’s cheated on him, says she will cheat again, and has mysteriously fallen out of love with him.
Zane, in her wisdom, told the woman that she doesn’t feel sorry for the girl – she feels sorry for her husband and, yeah, I can agree with that… but you should have seen some of the comments from women to the woman who wrote to Zane! A few dudes commented and while they were on-point, um, jeez, a lot of the women suggested that she cut him loose and send him to them, pointing out – and rightfully so – that good men like that are damned hard to find.
One woman said, “Bitch, just kill yourself!” I thought that was both kinda extreme for Facebook… but funny, too – you just had to see the whole comment to see the humor in this dire comment. Other women suggested she get with some of these other dudes out there, get her ass all turned-out and abused, and then ask herself if divorcing the good guy was a great idea.
Have any of you read Zane’s books or those of the authors she’s help get into this genre? Seen her show “The Sex Chronicles” on your local cable network? Some pretty saucy and outlandish shit, let me tell ya! She’s become the “Dear Abby” for many Black women (probably others as far as I know) and from what I’ve seen, she gives some pretty good advice that could be seen as her telling women not to act like the characters in the books she writes – be better than that.
The Facebook post had me thinking of how men will totally ass themselves out for a woman; will lie, cheat, steal and even kill each other over her affections… and this clueless hussy is doing this to someone who’s willing to make her his queen? And women say we have issues?
But y’all know me (or you should by now) – I wanted to know what changed her mind about this wonderful man after only 2.5 years of marriage; how did she go about deciding that she had fallen out of love with him when, by her own admission, he’s done nothing wrong to deserve this? Needless to say, the writer didn’t exactly disclose the details of this… although she did tell every last one of Zane’s fans that she’s already cheated on the man.
I dunno… I might be more willing to mention the former rather than the latter – but that’s me.
So, at the risk of drawing the ire of women, when they ask the question, “Why can’t I find a good man?” the answer might be, “Because you don’t know one when you see him and probably don’t know how to take care of him…”
Seeing shit like this – and, again, smeared all over Facebook where maybe a million people can see it (Zane has a ton of fans), gets me sounding like Mystery or John and asking the rhetorical question, “Why can’t we just learn to be good to, with, and for each other?” It puts me in into one of those moments where instead of wondering why men always get the bad rep (rhetorically, of course), it makes me wonder just what some women have rolling around in their heads when they find that good man… and dog him out for some reason.
Back to football…