If you’re the type of person who likes to have a bit of fun at someone else’s expense, find someone you know who is into, ah, unorthodox sexual behaviors and ask them how their sexual habits, sexuality, etc., jives with their religious beliefs.
Yes, yes, I know – religion is one of those things we’re not supposed to talk about right along with sex, death, and taxes… but it is an interesting question and even a valid one because I think that at some point, we wind up looking at this side of our existence and knowing that some of it doesn’t quite go along with what we’re taught in Sunday school and church, we have that moment when we wonder if, come Judgment Day, we’re gonna have a lot of explaining to do at the Pearly Gates.
I got to thinking about this – again – because of a blog I read the other day – http://spiritualstudd.com/2013/11/30/matchmaking/ – and it caused me to have a Lewis Black moment to see an example of how religion tries to make everyone walk the straight and narrow – emphasis on the word ‘straight’ and then how they expected everyone to do as they say… or else; they know that many of us do, in fact, fear for our immortal soul and worry about whether or not our earthly deeds are going to get us first-class accommodations in the hottest, nastiest, section of hell.
The first time I actually had to think about this was when there was a guy going down on me and making it feel all wonderful and everything when he suddenly stopped, looked up at me with a worried look on his face, and said, “I know I’m going to hell for doing this but I can’t help it – I need to do this…” – and then went right back to blowing me until I creamed his tonsils; his words had stuck in my head and had taken some of the delightful edge off of my release so as I prepared to return the favor, I had to shove the thought to the side for consideration after the fact.
But, as I got him moaning and groaning and fucking my face, I wasn’t having the fun I expected to have because now I’m thinking about having already paid for my ticket to hell by doing exactly what I was doing, something prohibited in religion and, fuck, that meant I was double-damned… didn’t it?
I had a crisis of faith and it was pretty bad until I took the time to sort it all out, weighing human behavior against religious mandates; it was a moment that actually made me seriously think about these things… and then decide that if there really was a hell – and I’m going merely because of my enjoyment in having sex and even sex with men – then I was going to get my money’s worth. I realized that despite what the preacher would be whooping and hollering about on Sunday mornings as he danced and pranced and stomped around in the pulpit, my relationship with God and Jesus Christ were mine alone and no one had the right to tell me anything different other than to repeatedly put out there that there are some things that religion frowns upon.
Like fornication, for example. I first heard the word in church and, being the horribly curious kid that I was, I went to the library the next day and looked it up – and popped a boner to see that, basically, fornication is unmarried sex, something that I had recently discovered and was into up to my cute brown eyes. I came to understand that it’s about control – religion wants everyone to do everything their way, like this is the best way for everyone to live but really being a controlling factor against human behaviors, like that urge we have to have sex and even who we can have sex with and when we’re supposed to do it, right along with how it’s supposed to be done.
That’s all about the perpetuation of the species thing which is important so we are made to understand – in some rather backhanded ways – that anything that doesn’t promote this important survival behavior is frowned up and, yes, if you make it a habit to keep doing the nasty in any way that’s not gonna make babies, well, I hope you have your fireproof skivvies on when it’s your time to leave.
It’s not that difficult to understand and, yeah, it does makes sense… up to a point. Sex is fun and the deeper one can dive into this particular pool, the more fun it can be. And, you betcha, being the rather inventive creatures we are, we have come up with so many ways to scratch that itch and, more often than not, without any thoughts about doing these things to make babies; indeed, many of us go about this sinful behavior in ways to make sure no babies are gonna show up unexpectedly, right? It’s why the Catholic Church has been so dead-set against contraception and abortion because, duh, ya can’t make babies like that.
So when we get to our gay brothers and sisters, well, they’re ‘damned’ nine ways to Sunday for throwing down with someone who’s the same sex as they are and, nope, ain’t gonna make babies like that, are they? That having sex with someone who’s the same sex as you are can be loads of fun and keeps them emotionally healthy doesn’t mean a whole lot to folks of the cloth – well, some of them because here of late, there are some really gay folks hanging out in pulpits all over the world, preaching the gospel and, hmm, is it hypocrisy for them to preach against sex and sexual behaviors when they’re not following the rules themselves?
Are they going to hell right along with the rest of us sexual sinners? Kinda makes you wonder, doesn’t it?
I was on one of the swinger sites we belong to, just checking out the forums and seeing what, if anything, the membership had written that I’d find interesting – and this topic came up. I was slightly amazed – but not terribly surprised – to read that a lot of people were poster children for debauchery even as they fiercely held onto their religious beliefs, reminding one and all that their relationship with God had nothing to do with how they liked to get their rocks off – and it wasn’t anyone’s business to begin with. Of course, it was clear that while I believed a lot of those forum writers did believe in God, their steadfastness to religious mandates weren’t exactly rock-solid and according to Hoyle, oh, like that “Thou shalt not commit adultery” thing and coveting thy neighbor’s wife.
That one incident early in my life taught me that as humans, we can easily justify anything that we do even though not everyone’s gonna agree with it. I think I’ve heard all of the ‘usual’ justifications – and have come up with them myself – where sex, sexuality, and religion is concerned. Sure, I’ve had a lot of sex and in ways that would make the religiously devout go into a coma and my justification for my behavior is rather simple:
I’m human – having sex is what we do and, uh-huh, we can be so creative in our pursuit of busting that nut. Religion doesn’t exactly agree with human nature and does what it can to prevent us from fully realizing our sexual potential because, again, some of isn’t going to result in making babies and I think that all of us, at some point, ultimately realizes this – and keep right on doing whatever it is we’re doing and in whatever way we’re doing it because we know and have proven to ourselves that sex isn’t just for making babies.
We’ve learned that we can be spiritual, that we can believe in a supreme being, and even believe in the promise of heaven even as we screw the neighbor’s wife, eat pussy, suck cock, fuck each other in the ass, and so many other things that are designed to get and provide orgasmic bliss.
And if we’re going to hell for any of this, oh, well – that’s between me and God and none of your fucking business, right?
Of course, I don’t recommend picking on someone about this if they’re rather sensitive about the subject but if this question has ever popped into your head, it’s always interesting to find out how others feel about it. I leave you for now with some related articles you may find interesting…
- Sex is Bad? (lucianuechter.wordpress.com)
- Atheists Do It Better: Why Leaving Religion Leads to Better Sex (gretachristina.typepad.com)
- New Study Shows that Women Have More Regrets After Casual Sex than Men Do (blackchristiannews.com)
- The only shameful thing about sex is justifying outdated views with ‘science’ | Jill Filipovic (theguardian.com)
- The Rise of Religion Might Be All About Sex (alternet.org)