Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Seeing Red

20 Jul

Somewhere in this big, beautiful world, there’s a person who started a rumor that bisexuals are transphobic and it’s my contention that this person, whoever they are, wherever they are, needs to have their ass very soundly and painfully beaten.  Who the fuck starts this shit?  Are they like that clueless motherfucker who first said that bisexuals don’t exist or that equally clueless son-of-a-bitch that said that being bisexual was only a waypoint to being gay?  Did someone, somewhere, wake up one day and decided that the best way to fuck with bisexuals and transgender folks was to get them fussing with each other with a “brand new” phobia – and then, once they started the shit, walked away laughing their ass off and being proud at how clever they were to be able to keep the War of Sexuality alive and well and, yeah, sadly, claiming victims?

Who does this shit?  But here’s the bigger thing:  Why are we – bisexuals – even listening to and/or believing this bullshit in the first place and more so when we should know the truth already?  Okay, that first piece of bullshit – bisexuals are transphobic.  Even I will admit that the whole thing about being transgender took me a while to get my head around and when I first heard it – and this was really way back when I learned what a tranny was – wow, let me get this straight:  You were born male… but you believe that you’re really female?  Um, okay, if you say so.  Even back when I actually met my first transsexual, I was like, “Well, okay, then!  I guess these folks are real after all!” and while I was pretty damned sure that going off somewhere so I could get some tits and start behaving like a women wasn’t something I wanted or needed to do, I put it in the “whatever floats your boat” category – and the fact that I knew several transsexuals, got along with them, and even had some really interesting sex with one tells me that while I may still think that I may never really understand this whole transgender thing, uh, do they instill an irrational fear in me?

Fuck no.  Would I associate with one?  Sleep with one?  Pitch a bitch if a transgender was a member of my family?  The answers are yes, yes, and what purpose would it serve to get pissy – or develop a phobia – over something that ain’t about me?  But, you see, whoever started this particular piece of very smelly bullshit got it into their heads that, at least by definition, bisexuals like “naturally born” males and females and those who have accepted the gender roles of being male or female and since there are, in fact, many bisexuals who are like this, that somehow means that we’ve somehow developed this irrational fear of, say, a woman who believes she’s a man and transforms her body to fit her self-perceptions.  If this doesn’t sound incredibly and horribly stupid, I don’t know what does.  Now, are there people who have this aversion – which is really what it would be if the person who started this shit knew the definition of a phobia?  Sure – we’re human and some of us can’t help from giving in to whatever this thing we have that makes us not like that which is different from us and, yep, it’s a safe bet that lumped into this somewhere are some bisexuals who have this aversion…

But it’s not all bisexuals; I’d say that this would be pretty fucking impossible to be true since I know that transgender folks don’t bother me at all.  In the War of Sexuality that is once more taking place or, really, continuing with renewed vigor, somebody somewhere just had to find a way to keep this shit at a boiling point, didn’t they?  I would like to meet them, preferably in a dark alley or in a locked room without any observers…

Now, that second load of shit – bisexuality is just a waypoint to being gay.  Now, it’s not that this doesn’t have any truth to it:  There are men and women who started out straight, felt that they were bisexual and carried on like one, but ultimately decided that they were gay.  Does it mean that all bisexuals are on their way to becoming fully homosexual?  Not only no but hell no!  Again, it’s fucking impossible for this to be true and, again, because I know – and if no one else does – that I would not ever want to be gay and I once more say this without any offense to anyone who’s gay.  Yes, I know a lot of bisexuals who have fretted about the possibility of being gay… because I fretted about that myself… but not because being gay was a bad thing more than being gay was proving to be very hazardous to one’s physical and mental health; sorry, gay folks, but some of you did wind up going through the wringer a lot, got hung out to dry, or wound up getting lost in the wind, never to be seen again.

The thing that make me see red is how many bisexuals (and other folks) are actually buying into this bullshit and then letting said bullshit fuck with them.  It’s a stereotype, a half-truth, shit that’s being put out there as “fact” and the only purpose is to incite a riot, to foment prejudices, and to keep the War of Sexuality going.  I hear and read about this shit – and I’ve pretty much heard shit like this all of my life – and (a) I can’t believe that there are people who still want to get this shit started and keep it alive and (b) we still haven’t learned, on the whole, not to believe in someone else’s prejudices or be irrationally afraid just because someone else is.  Why is it that we – humans – are so gullible to believe that if one bisexual happens to be transphobic, all of us must be?  Is it just me or is it patently and inherently stupid to believe that just because one bisexual decided that they were really homosexual that all of us are merely on the way to being a homosexual?

To me, these things and many more such pieces of lunacy and insanity fall into the category of “don’t believe the dumb shit;” indeed, there are several mantras involving not believing the dumb shit and not having time or patience for the dumb shit… but this shit here I’m talking about?  It is dumb shit and of the variety that no one with the proverbial ounce of common sense should ever buy into.  It begs a very painful “which is worse” question:  The people who start this shit… or the people who believe (a) that it’s true and (b) it applies to them somehow.  See, if you’re gonna accuse bisexuals of these things, you’d better be able to prove it and, oh, yeah, citing what amounts to some isolated incidents isn’t proof or a condemnation of bisexuals as a whole and, really, if you look at the shit that makes up racial prejudice, well, this sexuality prejudice should look damned – and sadly – familiar.

But, yeah, it does remain true that as long as one person believes that bisexuals are transphobic and/or that we’re only transitioning into being homosexual, bullshit like this will continue to exist.  Yep, we react to this because it is bullshit and it offends us and we do react to it just like I have here… except my reaction is along the lines of if I’m not buying into this shit, my bisexual brothers and sisters and transgender folks (who can also be bisexual, by the way) shouldn’t be buying any of these woof cookies.  We should be like, “Yeah, whatever, we hear you…” and keep on being about the business of being who we are meant to be.  The motherfuckers who start this shit just aren’t gonna go away if we strive to ignore them – there is always at least one of these bastards – but if we start to (a) not believe their shit and (b) tell them to talk to the hand whenever we come across them, well, they’re not gonna be happy to see that their campaign to divide and conquer us isn’t working as they thought it would.

Sure, the assholes who start this shit might be having a good laugh because they’re stirring us up like a hornet’s nest… and I guess they think that they can’t be stung for their troubles which, in this analogy, is a stupid way to behave; some of us, like yours truly, isn’t going to run and hide or be made to feel bad or even question our own sexuality over some shit we know isn’t the whole truth.  And, yes, some of us are going to get plenty pissed off and develop a yearning to locate these rabble rousers to not only give them a large piece of our minds, but to also slap the shit out of them for being so damned stupid in the first place.

Hey, rabble rousers… imagine me bitch-slapping you.  Yes, you are entitled to think or believe whatever you care to but this is me telling you that you’re believing some shit that might sound like the truth… but it’s not really as true as you think it is and if I know that, why don’t you know it?

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Posted by on 20 July 2015 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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