Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Bi-erasure

16 Nov

Look, they can say what they want against bisexuality; they can try minimize it, downplay it, denigrate and vilify it and despite all of this shit, the only thing that can erase me as a bisexual is my death.

They say we don’t exist and, shit, yeah, I not only beg to differ but aren’t those folks trying to make us go away saying the same shit they said about homosexuals?  It didn’t make homosexuality go away so what the fuck makes them think they can make bi folks vanish into thin air?

They can only erase you if you let them do it and this is one bisexual who says to those folks, “Bring it on… try to erase me.”  I’ve had sex with way too many men and women to believe that, what’s that they’re saying, I’m really homosexual.  Truth is they’re only half right because without any shame, I’m only homosexual when I’m sucking some dude’s cock (and probably because the wifey won’t do it for him) and, duh, when I’m not doing that, I’m heterosexual and if ya don’t believe me, ask my woman how much I love her and her sweet pussy.

Erase me?  Good luck with that.  Those poor deluded people say that we’re in denial… but are we really?  Hmm, I don’t see or hear any bisexuals saying that we don’t exist so who’s really in denial here?

It sure the fuck ain’t us…

When they’re not busy stupidly trying to erase us, they’re trying to scare us straight by playing the disease card and then only telling part of the truth.  They try to heterosexualize our sexuality, thinking that the same values held dear by straight folks somehow must apply to us, oh, like, you gotta be in a same-sex relationship or you’re not really bi… and to that I say,”Bullshit.  Your existence depends on being able to have a relationship because, oh, yeah, that’s really the only way you know; still, no matter if I’m in a relationship with a man or a woman, I will always be bisexual… so that same-sex relationship thing means nothing except to those bisexuals who do want this for themselves.

They try to minimalist us by saying romance is the only thing… and that’s not the whole truth either and maybe, just maybe, some us of make you nervous and itchy because we’re all about the sex either way.  Oh, we can fall in love just fine… but we will damn well do that in whatever way we want to and not how you think we should.

They bad-mouth us by saying we can’t commit, are too flighty, and way too greedy… but what they conveniently neglect to say that these traits aren’t the sole province of bisexuals.  Shit, I’d cop to the being greedy part because, damned right, I want all the love and sex I can get before I die and if ya got a problem with that, too bad.

No matter what you say, you can’t erase us and you never will.  Sure, you can fuck with the heads of some us, makes us doubt ourselves, and continue to blast us with your carefully spun numbers on suicide and domestic violence… but that ain’t in our sole province either because anyone, regardless of sexuality, can encounter these downsides of life.

So, fuck you; try to erase me if you dare.  I know, even if you don’t, that your moral resistance is futile, that your view of the world is way narrower than my own so you’re just wasting your time trying to ice something that no one in any period of time has been able to eliminate.

Tell me again how that worked when you tried to erase homosexuals…

You biphobic folks scrambling to find a way to negate our existence have to be aware of something:  The world is changing whether you like it or not; each and every day more people are discovering, embracing and reveling in their bisexuality; people who have sworn that they’d never be bisexual are learning that, hey, this ain’t as bad as they’ve been saying; more and more people are getting free of those monosexual bonds you cling precariously and oh, so dear to.

Change has always been coming… and it is here and all in your faces.  I’m not without sympathy or compassion; I do, in fact, understand why you’re fruitlessly trying to erase us because we threaten all in which you fervently believe… but I don’t and won’t ever apologize for what I am because I’m being exactly what I need to be:

Bisexual.  Capable of love and sex with men and women and however you want categorize that.  Why?  The answer is, actually, quite simple:  Because we can.  You see, either innately or by facts, we know that what you believe in is horribly flawed and, as such, while it works for you, um, we just ain’t feeling it, no, not anymore.  We’re like you… but not really.  We, like you eraser chasers, want all of the best we can get and in the time that’s available to us, be it love, romance, relationships or, yeah, just getting our rocks off… we just don’t have much in the way of qualms with who we can do these things with.

I know, if no one else does, that we tend to kill that which we don’t understand and I know you don’t really understand us because you’re incapable of walking in our shoes.  So, yeah, instead of understanding us – and let alone accept the reality of our existence – you wanna get rid of us and act as if we don’t exist… and how, exactly, has that been working for ya, hmm?

So, here we go:  If you’re straight, you’ve chosen your path and ditto if you’re gay.  You believe – and I don’t pretend to understand why – that once you “choose a side,” you can’t ever change your, ah, allegiance.  But just as you have, we’ve chosen our side, which happens to be more or less in the middle of things… And some of us used to be straight, some of us used to be gay, too.  Why?  Because the logic of what you believe is faulty and sorely outdated and, oh ,yeah, um, people have been known to change their minds about anything, right?

Finally, how prudish – and maybe even foolish – are you to be fussing about something you say doesn’t exist in the first place?  This isn’t like trying to prove or disprove the existence of God; no, bisexuality ain’t about a matter of faith, trust me… but your faith in what you believe blinds you to the truth.  You say bisexuality can’t exist… and yet it does because, uh, I’m bisexual and I know a lot of bisexuals so no – we are not a figment of your imagination and if you really need some proof, well, that, I believe, can be arranged, heh, heh.

Your words, such as they are, cannot erase what has always existed; you remind me of the child who thinks that if they cover their own eyes, you can’t see them.  Your way, your paths to love, sex, and relationships aren’t the only paths and we know because we’re walking it every fucking day.

Get with the program already, will you?  You want to erase something?  Make homelessness go away; erase hunger; erase drug abuse and the violence that comes with it if you wanna do something that’s more important and worthwhile and even noble because you can never make bisexuality go away just because we won’t fully conform to the way you see the world.  We’re not straight… but we’re not gay, either.

Deal with it.  You don’t have to like it but bisexuality just ain’t going anywhere until mankind is extinct.  You don’t have to agree with it, not that people are know for their ability to agree on anything.  If you refuse to accept our obvious existence, well, might I recommend you stop what you’re doing for a very serious reality check?  You think or feel in this unproductive way you do and that’s fine… but just because your head is wired like that doesn’t and never will mean that bisexuality and bisexuals don’t exist and simply because I know that I exist… and I ain’t the only bisexual on the planet; that’s as impossible as you trying to erase us, ain’t it?

Duh.  You’re fighting human nature and you cannot win against the nature of what we are and what we’re capable of when it comes to those things you hold dearly.


Posted by on 16 November 2015 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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6 responses to “Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Bi-erasure

  1. Ellen

    16 November 2015 at 09:52

    It seems to me, that you saying a guy wanting his cock sucked by another guy because the wife won’t do is a form of bi erasure. You’re erasing his desire for another man.


    • kdaddy23

      16 November 2015 at 10:41

      Oh, hell, no – wasn’t saying that, wasn’t implying that… I’m just stating a known fact to me that some guys go bi because of what their wife isn’t going to do so if anyone is erasing that desire of his, it ain’t me – it’s her and, yes, I know she doesn’t have to if she doesn’t want to. Still, this “little thing” can create new bisexuals… and therein lies the real point: We exist… but those folks who seek to erase bisexuals can’t seem to understand this.

      Bisexuals can be “born” and made and I know this for a fact; I’ve seen it, been part of the process, have helped many people decide what sexuality is comfortable for them so for anyone to say that we don’t exist is inherently stupid.

      You know they want us to choose a side and stay there… and folks like us ain’t trying to hear any of that. They’re running a smear campaign similar to the one they ran against homosexuals and, duh, they’ve failed to learn from history because they couldn’t erase homosexuality and they won’t be able to erase bisexuality.


      • Ellen

        16 November 2015 at 10:49

        People don’t go “bi”. You either are or aren’t. It’s not a choice.


      • kdaddy23

        16 November 2015 at 11:13

        It is for some, Ellen; again I know this for a fact. People do change their mind and decide that bisexuality is best for them, that it fulfills a need that being straight can’t handle. Decision is choice; you choose to do this just like people choose not to do this.

        Choice isn’t about what you feel; it’s all about what you choose to do or not do about your feelings. I could spend days explaining the decision process, how a straight man can go from being straight to choosing to be bisexual.

        I also know that as humans, we are indeed born with the potential to be bisexual but our social conditioning is designed to make us all straight… and it doesn’t work for everyone because we choose not to be straight based of our feelings and, yes, based solely on our need for sex. This is some deep shit and I’ve spent decades wading through it all.

        Homosexuals love to say that choice doesn’t exist in this… but I’ve always thought that they really don’t understand how this really works; they do, indeed, choose to accept their thoughts and feelings and, at some point, choose to act on them.

        Choice. You can’t escape it. One can say that they didn’t choose to have these feelings; one can say that they didn’t choose to be in the position to have to think about “changing sides,” too. But the moment you become aware of those feelings, the decision process starts: Do I ignore or accept them? Do I do something about them or not?

        Again, choice. It’s true that you cannot make someone bisexual if they don’t want to be – but that is still a choice on their part, isn’t it? They choose to stay true to heterosexuality as prescribed by our moral and social conditioning. But, people do change their minds about this, don’t they? Doesn’t matter why they do at a high level of thought but if they’ve changed their mind for any reason, they choose to do this.

        It’s inescapable. Like you, my friend; you didn’t want to accept your feelings and because, basically, they were upsetting your apple cart, making you think and feel things that you believed you shouldn’t. But, eventually, you choose to accept those feelings and, later, decided to take action and, yes, I know this to be true and factual because we’ve spent a lot of time talking about it.

        Do you see how this works?


      • Ellen

        16 November 2015 at 11:14

        You can choose to not act on it, but attraction is not a choice.


      • kdaddy23

        16 November 2015 at 11:30

        No, it isn’t – we are designed to be attracted to whatever attracts us and in whatever way that happens. But – and this is important – our social condition is designed to make us only be attracted to those of the opposite sex. It’s like I’ve told you: You can’t do anything about the way you feel; you can only do something about the way you act on them – or not.

        Attraction is what it is, be it emotional, physical,or both. You look at another woman and, pow, you feel drawn to her in some way and maybe you ask yourself, “What the hell is this?” Maybe you dismiss it… but it keeps happening and now, wait a minute; men turn me on… but so does women… and now the decision process starts and, yep, you even choose to think about this, just as some people choose not to think about this and convince themselves that they didn’t feel that same-sex attraction.

        They say that, as a man, I should never be attracted in any way to another man… but I am, aren’t I? I know what got the ball rolling for me in this and I’m both anal and curious enough to find out why I was attracted and all that. And I learned some stuff, just like I keep learning stuff and, yep, maybe even some stuff the bi-erasure folks aren’t aware of and all because they can’t imagine themselves being bisexual; today, it’s either be straight or be gay but the reality always has been that humans don’t work like that; otherwise, there would be no bisexuals, huh?

        Once upon a time, people said that you could only be straight and that’s the moral and scale conditioning talking; the real truth this seeks to put on lockdown is that we have no control over what attracts us – again, this is built into us. So, no choice in this due to the biological hard-wiring… but we still choose to accept the attraction as reality… or choose to deny that the attraction is there.



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