Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Changing Times

27 Dec

I have the “advantage” of being old enough to remember that there was a time when the most hated kind of person on the planet was a homosexual and I can remember what our local homosexuals had to go through and some of it was quite bad as it involved loss of life at the worse, severe physical trauma and being rejected by one’s family and society as a whole.  But homosexuals hung in there and began fighting against the system that sought to erase them for being the nasty stain on the fabric of heterosexuality.

Bisexuals, well, it wasn’t as if no one knew about us; the shit being said about bisexuals today was being said back in my time, although we usually didn’t face – or had to deal with – the terror homosexuals faced; I’ve heard so many jokes about “playing for both teams” and “hitting from both sides of the plate” that it isn’t funny although I did find it interesting that baseball terms were used to make fun of bisexuals.  At least where I lived, the biggest thing bisexuals had to worry about was being misidentified as being gay, something that happened from time to time but not as badly as it could have been; at the worse, those were fighting words because, hell, no – no one wanted to be associated with being gay, not with the way they were getting their heads handed to them.

Sexuality quickly became a political issue for homosexuals as they fought to be treated equally and have the same rights as their hetersexual counterparts and while the battle was being waged, many homosexuals were “acting straight” and passing themselves off as heterosexuals socially – they had to if they wanted to hold jobs and other such important things.  Some were able to pass themselves off as straight, others not so much and now the most fucked up thing one could be was a straight-acting homosexual and because of their use of deception more than the fact they were homosexual.  For the homosexual men who let their femininity show, well, many of them caught some really bad breaks and became the face of homosexuality; you think “gay,” and that swishy, limp-wristed homosexual would pop into your mind because they were more visible.

At one time, it sucked to be homosexual; you were just the worst possible kind of human being and more so if you were male; you’re supposed to be sticking your dick into women, you pervert, and not acting like one!  All the while, bisexuals have been flying under the radar and going unnoticed by our heterosexuality-oriented society; we were still just as mythical as unicorns or as hard to find as a four-leaf clover; you knew they existed, you just didn’t see them and, yes, it’s because we blended in with the expected heteronormative behavior, which was all well and good since, as we all know by now, bisexuals are both straight and gay and, like ice cream, we come in a lot of flavors.  Once LGB communities started popping up all over the country, the spotlight was being shined on those of us who aren’t straight – and you will notice the lack of the letter “T” and all the other letters that are currently tacked on here.  A political movement got up and running to combat yet another form of discrimination being employed here in a country where, supposedly, everyone has equal rights.

Society fought against the battles being waged by lesbians and gays and, as we know, they were fighting losing battles and to the point that after many skirmishes – and often with a great many casualties – but homosexuality was grudgingly being accepted and somewhere along the line, bisexuals wound up being the new targets for sexuality discrimination and summary erasure.  At first, we were getting hammered only by straight folks – you’ve heard all the shit that they say we should be doing right along with all the stereotypes… and then gay folks joined in and, at least from my perspective, took over from the straight folks who were now saying, okay, you go both ways… fine, as long as you ain’t trying to get with me.  The discrimination landed upon us with such force that bisexuals were creating new words to describe themselves as long as the word “bisexual” wasn’t being employed so that in the face of the growing angst, we were not the droid everyone was looking for.

The smear campaign began; we didn’t exist, bisexuality really wasn’t a legitimate sexual orientation/identity and the stereotypes were now being used as sticks to beat us with.  Bisexuals started to fight back and, just as homosexuality is, it’s become a political issue because, supposedly, bisexuals are as downtrodden as homosexuals once was so now we need to fight for equal rights… and it makes me say, “What the fuck?”  It’s my position that some LGBTQ(and the rest of the alphabet) have invoked misery loving some company and has now made their problems our problems… when most of us didn’t have any problems to begin with, not like homosexuals had to face.  All of a sudden, bisexuals were the ones acting straight and invoking some kind of privilege and, my God, what kind of insanity is this?  Did no one notice that we wouldn’t be bisexual if we were partly heterosexual?  Oh, yeah, that’s right; they stupidly – and I do mean this in the most unkind way – only pay attention to the gay side of us and they are, in my opinion alone, responsible for pitching a royal bitch about us choosing a side and staying there even as they spout their propaganda that bisexuals are really homosexuals in disguise.

Are you fucking kidding me?  It never fails to amaze me how many people actually buy into to this, bisexuals who now feel as if their very lives are being threatened and to the point where there are actually bisexuals who are willing to say that they’re gay!  I mean, really?  Seriously?  From where I sit, this is some really sad shit to see humans behaving like this… but history proves that we’ve always behaved like this:  If you’re not with us, you’re against us and if you’re not like us, then you must be destroyed.  I grew up during a time where being Black was still pretty damned dangerous and risky and being subjected to the prejudice was just par for the course.  It seems we keep shifting our discriminatory behavior from one focus to another, don’t we?  So now that we’re done fucking over homosexuals, it’s time to fuck over the bisexuals… and the bisexuals who weren’t bothering anyone and, for the most part, doing their best to stay off of society’s prejudicial radar but now, thanks to the efforts of some of those of the LGBTQ(whatever the fuck) persuasion, bisexuals now have targets painted on them, have been found guilty of not being straight or gay, and we’re on the list for summary erasure.  They insist that we’re in deep denial when, in fact, they’re more in denial that we supposedly are since they’re the ones who’re saying we don’t or can’t exist.

And if this shit doesn’t sound insane to you, fuck me, I don’t know what to tell you.  What do you mean that bisexuals don’t exist?  How the fuck is that even possible?  It can’t be because I’m bisexual and as I’ve said many times before, it just the fuck isn’t possible that I’m the only bisexual on the whole damned planet and, no, I can’t honestly say that I’ve been harassed because of my sexuality… oh, wait, that’s right – there’s no such thing as a Black bisexual man because all Black men are homophobic.  Yes, I’ve had to listen to some shit about being bisexual; a lot of the women I’ve dealt with weren’t fond of this and the gay men I’ve had sex with have tried their best to get me to be gay like them.  While in my younger incarnation this used to bother me, eh, I got used to it but in the larger social picture – and given the places I’ve been and the people I’ve met, nah, no one really gives a shit that I’m bisexual; no one has oppressed me, no one has denied me my rights as a human being, well, not since our society stopped treating Blacks as if they weren’t humans at all (and even that was before my time).  The only sexual discrimination I’ve faced has come from gay men, some of which feel that while I’m good enough to have sex with, they find my bisexuality to be insulting to them at the social level.  This used to piss me off but I got over it because at the end of any day, it just fucking doesn’t matter and more so since, um, I got to bust a few nuts at their expense.

I get that things change – they have to because change is, after all, inevitable.  But what I’m seeing just doesn’t make any damned sense; yes, there are a lot of people who struggle with their bisexuality and, yes, a lot of it is because we’re supposed to be straight and thanks to the current smear campaign, we’re being fed things that are more heteronormative – or even homonormative now, I guess – like the only way we can prove our bisexuality is to have a same-sex relationship… but then they say if we do, then we must really be gay even though it’s my contention that a relationship cannot in any way validate someone’s sexuality.

We need to stop this madness…


Posted by on 27 December 2015 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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2 responses to “Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Changing Times

  1. acquiescent72

    28 December 2015 at 01:39

    Eh….I still prefer to fly under the radar.


    • kdaddy23

      28 December 2015 at 03:06

      A lot of us would prefer to remain under the radar and not be touched by the ongoing insanity. I, for one, don’t buy into the bullshit and making being bisexual a political issue is just crazy; I still don’t know a bisexual who’s been denied a job, housing, service in establishments, etc., because they were bisexual – and we don’t have to tell the whole fucking world if it doesn’t suit our purposes.

      OUR purposes and not the agenda of an organization that seems to be working hard to erase us as a sexuality identity. They’ve already shat on the transgender and barely pay them any attention; they seem to want to waste their time fucking with some people who would rather be left alone to do their thing the way it’s always been done since the first bisexual made an appearance.

      Maybe they’ll get their heads out of their collective asses and realize that they don’t have the juice to mess with every living bisexual and spend more time getting their own house in order?

      Liked by 1 person


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