Normally, I’m loathe to indulge in stereotypes unless I’m of a mind to have a good laugh at some of them, but this is about stray thoughts at this moment and one such thought has to do with some gay men referring to their ass as a pussy and their dicks as a clit. Now, it’s commonly accepted the while some gay men act like women, love hanging out with women, getting fashion tips and the like… but if you’d ask a gay man if he’d have sex with a woman, well, ew, right?
So I do find it funny that I’ve had sex with gay men, I’m blowing them, and they say, “Yeah, suck my clitty!”
Say what? I’ve eaten a lot of pussy in my time here on earth and I’ve seen clits so small I actually had to look for them and clits so big and thick that the resemblance to dick is damned uncanny… but I’ve never seen a seven-inch clit. Likewise, I’ve had my dick in as many pussies as I’ve eaten – I can count on one hand how many pussies I’ve fucked without eating them first – and while I’m not a gynecologist, I am familiar enough with female anatomy to know the difference between pussy and ass, that and, um, outside of a rare exception, boys don’t have pussies.
I’m biting the inside of my lip to keep from laughing as I wonder if lesbians, when they go down on each other, scream out, “Yes! Suck my dick!” I’m guessing that they don’t but if I’m wrong, I wouldn’t object to being corrected on this one. As the soothing effects and amazing taste of my second cup of coffee washes over me, that gay men will refer to their body parts using female nomenclature just gives me the giggles, just as I wanna crack up laughing at my probable reaction if a dude ever told me I had a nice pussy or a nice clit… although I’m also sure I wouldn’t see the humor in this if he said this and we were about to get busy – but maybe I would and I’d find myself laughing so much that the sex we were about to have has now fallen off the table and is joining me on the floor as I laugh my ass off at such a ridiculous notion.
Gender reassignment surgery has gotten so good these days that if a gay man really wanted a pussy topped with a clit, yeah, they can do that and, from what I’ve read, a dude sliding into this newly created vagina would be hard-pressed to tell the difference from the real thing… and that’s if you can believe everything you read, of course.
That even gay men cannot escape the male/female dynamic of sex may be the reason why in parts of their world, men don’t have asses and cocks; they have pussies and clits and I admit to having difficulty hashing this out in my head; one’s self-perception is one thing but, um, if you take a peek in your underwear and you’ve got a ten inch dick between your legs, it’s a real stretch of the imagination that this hunk of meat is a clitoris and if that’s the perception, uh, that’s kinda troubling – or it would trouble me, anyway.
Now, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that all gay men don’t refer to their stuff in this fashion… but some of the stuff I’ve been reading recently coming from gay men who do make these improbable references has me scratching my head and more so when they’re coming from dudes I wouldn’t want to be in a dark alley with unarmed with a moderate arsenal. It seems to me – and I could be wrong – that machismo in gay sex has raised testosterone levels to heights I’ve not seen before and may cause a sense of denial for some of these guys to “imagine” that even though they’re having sex with a man, labeling the other guy’s stuff in feminine terms is somehow preserving his masculinity… or they’re verbally reassigning their own stuff to take a step away from the obvious: They just might think of themselves as females… but their physical form says otherwise… and I’ve not gotten the sense that any of these men believe that they’ve been born into the wrong body given how some of them are quite proud of the huge cocks they’re sporting and, yeah, if my dick was in the ten-to-twelve inch range, I’d be damned proud of it, too…
Bu I’d still call my dick a dick and my ass is still my ass. If I’m having sex with a guy, I’m sucking his dick and not his clit, fingering his ass, not his pussy. No matter what’s going on in his head about these things, this is still the male form I’m dealing with and, yeah, one could say that I’m too deeply rooted in the gender binary to still want to call a spade a spade or, in this case, call a cock a cock… because I damned well know what a clitoris looks like.
Yes, I acknowledge their right to call their shit whatever they want to – I just question the sanity of this… and then, sometimes, just laugh about it. If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it’s not a squirrel.