I was just over on the forum site for bi guys and saw a post by a guy who described himself as a straight but bi-curious guy and, according to what he wrote, he seems to get a craving for some intimate male contact… but only when he’s been drinking; he had asked if anyone else experienced such a thing.
It’s not as unusual as he might think (if he thinks it is). Alcohol, in particular, is what they call a Central Nervous System (CNS) depressant and on top of getting one buzzed, tipsy, or drunk, it lowers inhibitions – it’s a bit of science behind the saying that a drunk talking is speaking the truth (and other forms of this). I’m sure we know quite a few people who likes to have a couple of drinks – then is ready to throw it down and using the euphemisms of “relaxing” or “loosening up,” or otherwise “getting in the mood.” Yep, depending on one’s metabolism, it’ll relax you and get ya all nice and loose… but your body isn’t the only thing getting relaxed.
Likewise, I’m sure we know some folks who,after a few drinks, get rather belligerent, are hilariously funny, or get all Zen-like and, often, it’s in stark contrast to their personality when they’ve not been drinking. And, yes, there’s a reason there was a song about blaming in on the alcohol and why it was said that the easiest way to get into a girl’s panties was to get her drunk first. I’ve written quite a few times about hanging out with guys who are one way before they start drinking and wind up doing a Jekyll and Hyde once they do start getting sauced. The hair of the dog “loosens” them up – and this is the CNS depressant effect kicking in, they get horny (or hornier if they started out that way), and as I’ve written, I’ve seen all kinds of shit happen with and between guys who, when stone cold sober, would never admit to wanting to play with a dick in some way.
It doesn’t exactly remove conscious thought but kinda unlocks the safeguards we put in place that work with our ability to make rational decisions and other Psych 101 type stuff. I’ve heard so many guys, after the fact, express shock and surprise that they got fucked up last night and had a wild time getting sexed with another guy or, “Man, I don’t believe I did some shit like that!” It is said that when this happens, the buzzed guy isn’t doing anything he hasn’t wanted to do but, when sober, such impulses are safely locked away… but when they start drinking, those locks get picked right down to a near subconscious level and desires that are normally suppressed can come rushing to the surface.
Of course, I’ve gotten a kick of how such dudes react after the fact, ya know, once they sober up enough for their locks to re-engage. I’ve heard comments from, “I don’t know why I wanted to do that (or what made me do that)!” to just flat out denying that they did it (yeah, home boy, you really did and we all saw it), and including guys who will grudgingly admit that the only time they get the urge to play with a dick is when they’ve been drinking. It’s one thing if you know a guy who behaves like this when under the influence… and something else when a guy you think you know gets juiced, looks at you and says, “Don’t tell nobody but I really want to suck your dick, man…”
Indeed, there’s a reason why some men will publicly say that the only way they’d let some dude suck their cock is if they were bombed out of their minds and it’s probably because they’re aware of the person they are when under the influence or, more likely, they’re claiming mental incompetency before the fact; again, depending on metabolism, too much booze can wipe short-term memory temporarily; they know they did something (not necessarily this) but they can’t remember what they did, let alone why they did it. Oddly, if a guy gets pissy drunk and starts a fight, no one is of a mind to forgive him for being so out of control but if “Earl” tied one on just the right way and had sex with “Joe,” well, he really can’t be blamed for that, now can he? I’ll let you guys be the jury on this one if it pleases the court.
I’ve had guys tell me that they’ve gotten a bit trashed and, shit, they were sucking dick, fucking an ass, getting fucked, etc., and being sober, they just don’t understand what made them do that because they really can’t think of any time they had an interest in doing such things. I’ve tried to explain to them how CNS depressants can work on a person and how it’s possible that, consciously, no – the last thing they wanna do is give someone a blow job but, ah, subconsciously? A whole different story and one that only comes into the light once a few shots of Jack Daniels picks their locks and lets this particular desire loose. I’ve seen guys stop drinking because of what they’ll do when they tie one on; I’ve seen guys keep drinking but severely cut back on how buzzed they get and, um, a few times, I’ve seen guys drink a bit more than usual, thinking that at one level of intoxication, they’re lining guys up to blow them so if they go a bit past that zone, maybe it won’t happen? Um, no – it doesn’t quite work like that unless you drink yourself into unconsciousness.
One guy asked, “But if this is something that’s been hiding out in the back of my mind, how come I don’t know about it?” Well, that’s because we’re often not aware of what our subconscious mind is doing; oh, under certain conditions, some things can leak into our conscious thoughts but it’s suspected that our conscious minds are so active when we’re awake that it has the effect of hiding whatever our subconscious is doing in the background… well, until you start drinking. The guy looked at me and shook his head, saying that he ain’t even thinking about that shit if he’s had one drink and I allowed that depending on a few factors, no – one drink might not unlock someone in that fashion but it could be a start. He was kinda in a bad place – he had a look on his face that suggested that he no longer trusted himself. I told him, honestly, that there’s really nothing to be ashamed of, that such things happen to a lot of people and having sex isn’t the only thing that can get unlocked; some people get blitzed and steal stuff or do other things that, when sober, they’d never dream of doing. I also said to him that if he knows that every time he starts drinking there’s a chance of him doing whatever he did again – and the thought of that really bothers him – perhaps he shouldn’t be drinking or, at the least, don’t drink to the point where his hidden desires can come racing to the surface.
Are people who get under the influence really acting on unconscious desires? Maybe; some experts say yes, some say that getting all liquored up removes ones ability to know from right and wrong and while I’ve seen some shit done by people under the influence, I kinda shrug and admit that both theories could be true because we really don’t know what truly goes on in someone’s mind, sober or inebriated and whatever they do when juiced might not be consistent; “Jim” might have gotten fucked up last night and consented to have his balls emptied by “Al” Friday night; “Jim” ties one on Saturday night and he does something entirely different… even nothing at all other than getting buzzed and finding his way home. If the experts don’t really know the whole story, then neither do I – I just know what I’ve seen first-hand as well as some very interesting stories relayed by reliable sources.
In my opinion, it’s not that a guy will get toasted and engage in some M2M action – it’s about what’s going on in his head when he sobers up and how he’s gonna react to what he did and provided he can remember it at all.