I’ve written about this before but since this blog is about what’s in my head, my visit to the bi forum a little while ago had posts from a lot of guys who’ve yet to take the plunge wondering, “What’s it like to (add something here)?” I’ve allowed that even with my writing ability, I have a hard time explaining what it’s like but I understand that those details are couched in terms that there aren’t any words for and if there are words for them, um, I’ve yet to find them.
What’s it like to have a dude sucking your dick? Well, that depends on what you’re thinking about: The act itself… or the person doing it. Some think there’s a difference and even a major difference when the only real difference is the sex of the person doing it; the act of being sucked – and outside of technique and other stuff like that – is pretty universal. What’s it like to suck dick and sucking the guy off? A bit harder to explain because there are so many intangible thoughts in play that about the only thing you can say about this is, “It feels good.”
What’s it like to get screwed? Whew, that’s kinda tough. There’s a topic on the bi forum about this and a bunch of guys who have never (or have yet to) feel the real thing are suggesting and recommending using fingers and assorted toys and even getting pegged by the old lady to find out what this is like… and while it’s close, it’s not the same thing as having the real thing worming its way inside you. I’m not saying it wouldn’t feel good to have one of those “new” prostate massagers in there but even having a five-inch dick in your ass is really difference and I’d say more so because the guy attached to said dick, um, doesn’t have an off switch per se. Even I can’t find words adequate enough to describe what it’s like to be exposed to the full fury of another man’s lust other than to say it can be thrilling… or the scariest thing you’ve ever experienced.
While there’s nothing wrong with a guy speculating about what it’s like to experience these things, methinks there’s a flaw involved here, i.e., you get to thinking one thing and even believing it to be true – and, yes, the human mind does work like this – only to find out that, say, having a nine-inch dildo poking you in the butt is seriously different from having a nine-inch dick with a really horny guy attached to it hammering away at you and, um, at the least, going through the motions of leaving something of himself behind… in your behind.
I know these guys watch gay porn to get an idea of what it’s like – and because they say they do – and, there’s a few flaws here as well. Yes, one can get an idea of what it’s like… and they could discover it’s the wrong idea and all because of how gay porn is scripted and edited; you’re not getting the full story because what you never see is the behind the scenes preparations that take place and, oh, yeah, the two guys you’re looking at on the screen might not be gay or even bisexual – they’re just getting paid to do a job. I’ve seen guys write and wonder what it would be like to have their mouth and throat fucked and just as they can see in almost any kind of porn; I’ve seen those same guys express a desire to have their face fucked in that fashion… but because they’ve never sucked a dick, they don’t quite understand that there’s a danger or two having a dude with a ten-inch dick clearing your throat out like that – and that’s despite they can see on the screen some hapless babe or dude gagging or even throwing up.
The danger of actually choking or aspirating (that’s breathing in) saliva or vomit into your lungs can be fatal. So, hell, no, using porn as a basis to answer the question of what it’s like isn’t really answering the question.
Here’s the rub about all of this: Underneath their questions of what it’s like is some reality… and something I kinda find humorous because there are guys who have zero experience with sex with another man asking other men with zero experience what it’s like – classic “blind leading the blind” at work here… but, at the same time, they seem to understand that the reality is that if you wanna know what it’s like to do any of that stuff they’re talking about, you have two choices: Ask someone who actually knows what it’s like… or get your horny ass off the porch, jump into the pool, and find out for yourself.
And if you can find someone who’d be willing to tell you what it’s like, make sure they tell you all of it and not just the good parts. Doing any of this can be pleasing, gratifying and satisfying… but it can also be horribly traumatic as well. When I write about this, I do my best to be as for-real about doing this stuff as I have the words for, from talking about the physical aspects as well as the emotional ones and, yeah, there’s a reason when I’m talking to a newbie who wants to find out what it’s like and I’m trying to convince him to not find out because I know that having sex like this, while it sounds good and all that, is just something that everyone – or anyone – can do. The biggest barrier to actually finding out for one’s self what it’s like is overcoming whatever fears they have associated with it and, as much as I dislike saying it, a lot of those guys who wanna know what it’s like are really too afraid to find out. Again, I’d never say that their fears are unjustified but, yeah, if your fears are stronger than your desire to find out, chances are you’ll never find out what it’s like.