You’re walking along somewhere, minding your own business when you see someone who is male/female just like you are and you get hit with a rush of desire just by looking at them. Two thoughts cross your mind: One is, “Whoa… what was that and where did it come from?” and the other is that you know that looking at a fellow male/female should not have invoked such an intense response within you.
Maybe you shrug it off or otherwise chalk it up to some other source or reason… but then it happens again, like you’re at work and a coworker passes you – maybe you know of them, maybe you don’t, but that rush of desire is familiar because you’ve felt it before. That first time might have been coincidence… but to feel it again? Perhaps you try to shrug this off in some way but now there’s something going on that requires an explanation and you flag it in your mind, a nice easy test – next time you see someone, how are you gonna react?
If “Don” sees you (and you’re a guy, of course) and stops to ask a question or just to say hi and, whoa, there it is again, that rush of desire that’s threatening to make you pop a boner and now you’re wondering what the fuck is going on; you can’t possibly be getting turned on looking at other dudes! But there’s no denying what you keep feeling when you look at certain guys even though there’s a part of your mind trying to feverishly deny it because you know that such things ain’t supposed to happen.
Are you as weird as you’d probably be feeling? Nah, not really and here’s why: While we are all taught about what should be sexually attractive to us; if you’re a guy, it’s a gal and, well, you know the other side of this. What we find out is that while our minds might have something to say about this, our bodies are really programmed to be sexually attracted to whatever it thinks is attractive in that way and this realization causes some issues because it directly clashes with what your brain “knows” to be true.
But if it happened, um, how true could it really be? I’d be the first to tell you that when you start asking yourself why this has landed on you “out of nowhere” there are a lot of reasons and that some of those reasons might be buried in your subconscious where you can’t readily see or examine them. There’s a war taking place in that space between your ears and the way your body is reacting ain’t helping matters any; you fervently believe that what you’re feeling can’t and shouldn’t be happening but, yeah, the truth that’s giving you a problem is that it did happen and maybe more than once.
Are you weird because you might see a guy and have a desire to have sex with him? Are you some kind of freak because “all of a sudden” something like sucking a dick sounds and feels like something you really need to do? Does it make you gay? Are you bisexual? Are you crazy because these thoughts are practically dominating your thoughts?
Nah, not really. It happens because there’s a physical part of our brains that doesn’t give a fuck what you’ve been told or even think about sex and attraction. “But I’m very attracted to women!” Of course you are and that didn’t change one bit, did it? That feels as right as rain and, damn it, just like seeing that half-naked guy at the gym and getting turned on felt right. It’s kinda simple: The “lizard” part of our brain only cares about one thing – does someone “look” good enough to have sex with and our senses automatically provide input that either the lizard part of our brain says, “Yeah, I wanna do the nasty with him!” or, “Nah, I ain’t feeling this guy like that… but that dude over there? Hmm…”
Everything we think we know says that this isn’t a natural reaction and I hate to break it to ya but, yeah, it is and having the thoughts and/or feelings doesn’t make you as weird as you may think; what, do you really believe that you’re the only person who has found themselves feeling/thinking like this? Let’s get something straight here: Just because you’ve “suddenly” got this on your mind doesn’t mean you have to run out and make The Lizard happy even though, yup, it would be crazy happy if you did just that and the sooner, the better.
But, hell, no, it doesn’t make you weird; there’s nothing “wrong” with you despite what your conscious thoughts might be telling you. Doesn’t really mean you’re gay or even bi; if anything, um, you’re a “victim” of a set of stimuli that The Lizard finds sexually exciting. If you can ward off the desires and stuff, good for you; if you find that you can’t, well, okay, doesn’t mean that you’re weak-minded or anything like that because sexual attraction is some powerful juju and, obviously, doesn’t really work the way you’ve been told it should.
Thinking and doing aren’t the same things; can’t really shut up that little voice in your head screaming at you to suck that dick or eat that pussy – or do both! – but you do have some control over the doing part and many people who have felt this haven’t done a damned thing about it and probably never will.
You’re just not as weird as you might think.