Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Wishful Thinking?

18 Sep

From time to time, my Padawan learner, Cityman, will share articles from Queerty ( that tends to spark some interesting conversation between us.  For those of you who have never heard of this site (and I hadn’t until Cityman told me about it), it seems to be a pro-gay man site that has overtones of a great interest in making or convincing straight men to be homosexual men, often featuring articles written by SMEs – subject matter experts – who illustrate some stuff that, at a high level, is rather well-known like all men have homosexual tendencies (yeah, it’s true and was proven way before I was even born)… but because many straight guys do not act on this potential, well, Queerty likes to state that heterosexual men should stop faking the funk and give in to their gayness.

If you’re now having a good laugh at this, join the party; I’ve read some shit on this site that I find to be patently ridiculous at times, overstating the obvious at others, and chock full of wishful thinking but what’s even more eye-rolling is reading the comments posted for any given article, which are pro-gay, usually anti-bi, and when I read them, shit, I can hear fingers snapping, heads bobbing back and forth, and eyes rolling as the commenting membership there offers up their opinions that are usually around the theme as mentioned at the end of my last paragraph:  Stop being in denial, admit that you want to be gay, and start giving up the dick and ass like you know you want to.

The last couple of articles Cityman presented me with talked about how the bro job (y’all remember this one, don’t you?) has transformed into something being called “dude sex” and how guys in rural America who are straight and married with children have embraced the concept of the bro job eagerly while maintaining that they’re still heterosexual.  In the article about the guys in rural America, the author postulated that these men can engage in bro jobs (or even dude sex, whatever the fuck that really means) with a clear conscious because there’s no sexual attraction happening between them and their equally straight and married partners; it’s just two guys helping each other out whenever the situation calls for some help, from being bored silly to being lonely and in need of companionship.

The transformation of the bro job to dude sex, well, I admit that this one mystified me because even though I’ve always known that the bro job exists, I also know that whatever happens isn’t always merely a blow job; it’s not unusual for a bro job to start with a blow job and end with backsides being penetrated and with or without intent.  I got the impression that the author of this particular piece was trying to convince readers that a bro job is specifically one thing… but because there seems to be some “evidence” that it doesn’t stop there, this dude sex thing is a new kind of critter…

Which it isn’t and, again, never was but Queerty tends to put such a spin on such articles to once again confirm their agenda and “belief” that straight men – and men this site seems to be fixated on – are really more gay than they’re willing to admit.  Do some straight guys engage in bro job activities?  Yes.  Do they do more than suck each other off?  Yes.  Is it often a matter of convenience?  Yes.  Does any of this mean that these guys are as straight as they say they are?  Um, no; even I’d only say that if they only did the bro job thing once but if they keep doing it when the opportunity presents itself, sorry my man – you’re not as straight as you want to believe.  But does this mean that any of these guys are really and truly gay… or they want to be gay?

Oh, fuck no!

Now, the part about the lack of sexual attraction lending itself to the statement that guys who engage in this are still straight had me laughing because I know – even if it’s not believed – that sex between men can happen with or without sexual attraction and if there is an attraction, it’s to the sex itself and not so much to the person.  Sure, if the two guys know each other, are deemed to be safe and can keep the secret, dicks will get sucked and sexual attraction be damned.  Indeed, I see lots of guys on the bi forum site who confess and profess that they just do not feel sexually attracted to men… but the thought of playing with a dick in some way is overwhelmingly powerful and, oh, yeah, some of these guys say they believe they’re bi and some usually start their post out with a statement about being a straight dude.  On the site, some members denounce the lack of sexual attraction thing as if such a thing isn’t possible… but this is that difference between how someone thinks shit should work and how it can really work.  And the dudes that comment on Queerty seem to be just as guilty when it comes to this notion; one guy commented that some sexual attraction had to be in place because it doesn’t make sense to have sex with someone you’re not attracted to.

To me, this guy doesn’t know as much about humans as he thinks he does and kinda/sorta doesn’t know shit about how men, in particular, can behave when they wanna get their rocks off.  One guy commented with a saying often heard in reference to the US Navy – “Any port in a storm…” which is a more accurate statement and speaks to the opportunistic nature of men:  If we can have sex and we need to have it badly enough, anyone who says yes will serve the purpose and if there’s no sexual attraction to the “target,” eh, no big deal because the focus is solely on getting their nuts emptied and by any means necessary.

What I’ve yet to deduce is why this site seems to be hell-bent on converting straight men into gay men and along the way dismissing male bisexuality.  To me, it’s a lot of wishful thinking on the site’s part as well as the responding membership. I get that wanting a chance to seduce a straight guy into some sex is damned attractive and along the lines of how some guys just drool all over themselves at the thought that they might be getting ready to screw a virgin.  To dedicate a website to the unseemly notion that all straight men want to and should be homosexual says some things that, honestly, no one should take seriously so if nothing else, what’s written on this site and the resulting comments tend to be entertaining while speaking to a very narrow view of human sexuality, i.e., being homosexual is the only way for anyone to be and any straight guy who resist this “fact of life” is in need of a very serious attitude adjustment and the sooner, the better.

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Posted by on 18 September 2017 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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