…that you’ve promised not to tell if they won’t, what’s next? Well, that depends on whatever the oath of secrecy was invoked for, from something simple as “I’ll show you mine and you show me yours” to, um, things that are, ah, more involved up to and including touching, tasting, and inserting.
Growing up, the main – and probably only reason – to invoke the oath was to satisfy that curiosity about the sex thing and more so – and as I’ve said hundreds of times – when you were told that boys ain’t supposed to do that shit with each other… even if, historically, it’s just boys being boys and an almost instinctive response to that incredible rush of hormones that’ll hit us like the proverbial Mack truck. It has nothing to do with the things that become important to us when we reach adulthood; nope, this is all about finding out why boys shouldn’t do it to/with other boys as well as why this is such a horrific thing to do.
Even as adults, we will invoke the oath – and not because someone is literally beat us until sitting down becomes an impossibility but because some people don’t want to understand why a guy surrounded by a plethora of pussy would want to play with another guy’s dick and they tend to make one’s life as miserable as possible for a major rules violation doing this. Ah, but when younger…
It’s both scary as anything experienced to date and more exhilarating than waking up Christmas morning and finding more shit with your name on it than your young mind could comprehend. Pants and underwear get pulled down and taken off and, yep, the other guy has some stuff between his legs that’s similar to what you have between your legs so now it’s about doing whatever invoking the oath entailed, from reaching out and touching it to putting it in your mouth… and if you’ve already done these things before – and chances are good that between the two of you, this isn’t the first time the oath has been invoked – it’s about climbing on top of each other and “doing the nasty” until it feels really good and strange… or something happens that seems to always make you feel like you’re about to die and all that yellow-white stuff makes an appearance.
Such things are about as wrong as anything can get – or so we were told, anyway, but when the oath has been invoked the participants know they’re doing something they shouldn’t be doing even though, ahem, it really, really feels good to be doing such a bad thing. If you’ve done it to girls (not an easy thing to do) you kinda innately understand that doing it to a boy isn’t all that different – that stick it in someplace and move up and down thing works on both, just like having someone put your thing in their mouth and sucking on it isn’t very different from when a girl does it (and good luck to you if you can get her to do that). It’s that sex thing that grownups repeatedly tell us that we should not ever do until, one, we’re grown up enough to do and, two, only when we really care about or love someone – and, preferably, a girl.
But because we’ve invoked the oath and specifically for the reason to find out about this sex thing, one, we must obviously be old enough to do it even if we don’t truly understand what we’re doing and, two, well, dude, I like you and all that… and let’s leave it at that and do this again. And we can do this again… because I won’t tell if you won’t is still in effect. In those younger days – and especially if you grew up in the times that I did – the next worst thing than getting caught doing it to each other was finding out that you didn’t keep your promise to not tell anyone what you did with each other. In the adult world, such a betrayal can have catastrophic consequences but in the younger areas of operation, at the least, you’ll lose a friend or, at the worst, get into a fight… or even worse, now you gotta find someone else to do this with and with the hope that, unlike that other snitch, the next guy you invoke the oath with won’t go running around telling everyone they come across that the two of you did something that you weren’t supposed to do, let alone know about. Finding someone who won’t snitch might be difficult and you’ll most certainly wind up getting your head handed to you at every turn by your peers who can be quite ruthless and without mercy… then again, having that oath broken might also get you a lot of attention, too, and from other guys who have their own curiosity about why boys should never do it to boys and, really, is there such a thing as too much investigation into this?
Nah… not really.
In the adult world, such discretion is taken as a given and goes without saying although some guys who have much to lose if anyone else finds out, will point out that, um, it wouldn’t go well for them if word of what’s about to happen should get out to the wrong people. It’s considered to be a great breach of etiquette to kiss and tell but, as mentioned yesterday, there are ways to do this without getting into specifics that might reveal the other guy’s identity and, besides, when you’ve done this, wow, it’s almost like you just gotta tell someone about it… provided there’s anyone you could tell, that is. Along with “I won’t tell if you won’t,” we also invoke “Don’t ask, don’t tell” and the variant of even if you ask, I’m still not telling. But just as in the younger iterations of this, once the oaths have been given and accepted, it’s all about doing whatever was negotiated for and, hopefully, not giving much thought to the shit storm that could possibly crop up if those wrong people find out that you just spent the last half-hour – or more than that – getting your rocks off with another guy.
Cityman said to me, “It would be easier on us if everyone would stop being prudes and just accept the fact that men having sex with other men is a natural thing to do. If only we could be more open about it…” And he’s right even though we continue to have this angst and in the face of the obvious fact that men have sex with other men whether they’re gay or bisexual. But until we can get our heads out of our respective asses about this, invoking “I won’t tell if you won’t” remains a necessity. It just wouldn’t go over well for a guy who’s respected in his community and by his peers to learn that one of his favorite things to do is to dress up in lingerie and spend some time on his knees sucking cock and being gleefully sodomized and inseminated, would it? When you’re much younger, peer respect and establishing your own reputation, wow, I just cannot express how important that is so, nah, it’s not gonna help your rep if your peers find out that while you’re known to chase skirts to the ends of the earth, you’re not exactly opposed to swallowing a load of spunk, putting a load into some dude’s butt, or taking a load yourself. It’s just not gonna look good for anyone else to discover that one of your favorite things to do with other guys is to get together with a bunch of them so they all can fuck you… and because that just thrills you to no end and part of that thrill is that you ain’t supposed to be doing that shit in the first place.
Ask me no questions and I’ll tell you no lies… and if you won’t tell anyone that I’d love it if we could get naked and suck each other’s dick until we both cum, I won’t tell anyone either…
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