Life, Living and Loving: In Greeting the World

30 Aug

One of the things I wanna make clear – or clearer – about this “Hello, World!” thing is that you don’t have to be bi, straight, gay, or whatever in order to have your eyes and mind opened so that you can stop clinging to things dogmatic so that you can see newer realities and possibilities.

It’s just that my bisexuality is what opened my mind and eyes because there’s the way things have always been, the way they’re “supposed to be,” and the way things can really be… and when you get your eyes and mind opened, you tend to see people so deeply entrenched in the first two things more than you do people who are more in tune and in touch with the last thing.

Even with your mind and eyes opened, sometimes, the only action required is to just pay attention to what’s going on around you. If your mind is now in that “all things are possible” mode of thinking, just pay attention to those around you who aren’t thinking this way and ask yourself why they aren’t – or, when you can, ask them why they think and behave the way they do… then pay attention to how they may answer.

If/when they answer and your first impression is that they have no idea what they’re missing and what this big, wonderful – but scary – world has to offer, I’d say your eyes are wide open… and even if you’re just aware of the possibilities.

Remember, thinking and doing aren’t always the same thing as as we’ve all been led to believe. Actions don’t always speak louder than words since we need “words” to be able to define, if only to ourselves, what that action is to be taken… or avoided.

You just have to look and ask yourself a lot of unbiased questions and questions not based on what you would or wouldn’t do in any given situation – you just gotta ask if a thing really makes sense or not while using your wide-open mind and eyes to look at as much as you can… and the cool thing about this is that you can keep right on being yourself as you observe the world around you – just pay attention to how many times you get zapped and culture-shocked as the world begins to reveal itself.

Let’s use DDJennifer as an example. If you’ve read her blog you know what she’s about in her life; if you haven’t, go find her blog and read it… and be prepared to get seriously zapped – I know I was but I’m used to being zapped. You read her blog, see what she’s up to, and if you’re thinking, “Fuck… I wouldn’t do that!” you’re looking at it the wrong way even thought that’s almost an automatic, knee-jerk reaction. She does what she does and she’s quite happy doing that thing that a lot of people can’t imagine, let alone do; she’s “different” but not so much because at the root of it all, she’s just being like everyone else is: Doing whatever they gotta do to “make life worth living.”

It’s not that we’re different – it’s how we are and if you’ve had a “proper” introduction to the world, you see all of this, both the good and the bad of it, but with great awareness of how diverse we are and can be and that we should rejoice in our diversity instead of always looking at how fucked up we can be.

Or getting stuck in that “that ain’t the way things are supposed to go/be/happen” that many of us are quite guilty of. That’s not really a bad thing – we have this… need to believe in something even if that belief is, ironically, not believing. But we do get stuck in this which doesn’t allow us to see other things, let alone appreciate them in any way. Are people supposed to engage in same-sex stuff? Have relationships with multiple partners? Should women go on dick hunts just because they can and need to?

If you’re thinking, no, no, and hell, no, then I’d suggest that your eyes and mind aren’t as open as they could be since, um, the answers from a lot of people are a joyous, “Hell, yeah!” across the board. Sure, there’s having morals and principles and all that but those things are the way things are supposed to be and deemed inviolate and immutable… even though we know that they aren’t.

You get to meet the world and, yeah, it’ll shock the shit out of you. There are just things that don’t conform to the way things are supposed to be or that’s the way it’s always been done. You don’t have to like it – you just have to be aware of it, to see it for what it really is. It’s okay to say, “Well, I wouldn’t do that…” but you can, perhaps, appreciate that someone is doing it. Even our ingrained habit of waging war and killing ourselves over dumb shit – and if you see that it’s really dumb shit but you also see that those who wage war doesn’t think that it’s dumb shit, you’re seeing the world the way it really is; the way it’s always been and, yep, the way it shouldn’t be.

You see it and say to yourself, “Fuck…” and if you’re feeling helpless and powerless to do much about that crazy shit, don’t let it make you feel bad because what you can do is focus more on those things you can do something about in your piece of this amazing world we live in.

I was talking to someone about this – yeah, back in the day – and they asked me if this meant that a person should just do shit because they can do it… and I said, “Nope – they just have to be more aware of what they can do and achieve if it’s something they find they need to do.”

I pointed out to him that a lot of people get zapped to find that, um, they’re not as straight as they’re supposed to be and it’s often quite upsetting – that’s shit that happens to other people and it should never, ever happen to them… but there they are just the same, huh?

He – and I have to say stupidly – said, “Oh, so that means I should go have sex with some dude?”

“No – it means that you should be aware of it and accept that it is what it is and no matter what you believe in,” I said. “You’re stuck in that loop and believe, like a lot of people that it shouldn’t happen, that there’s no reason for it to happen and no self-respecting person should ever stoop that low and all that… and you’re wrong – you just don’t see that you are.”

“Do you really believe that you have some kind of right to tell or try to make someone conform with your view of things… when your view is considered to be a very narrow one?” I had asked – and I wasn’t surprised when he said that he did have this right. More open-minded people automatically see the fallacy in such thinking, don’t they?

I do… and because the world continues to zap the daylights out of me, opening my eyes and mind to that which is possible even when it says things about humans that ain’t so nice and pretty, you know, being polite about it. All you can really do is use this knowledge and apply it to how you want and need to live your life… and with the sure understanding that there’s someone out there who’s thinking, “I wouldn’t do that and no one should.”

It is not to say that we can’t have our opinions about stuff because we do… but ask yourself what your opinions are based upon; is it actual, real-life experience on your part… or are you just toeing the “party line” and your opinion is really based on that which isn’t supposed to be? Shit, even I zapped myself when I discovered myself thinking like that… and when I knew differently. So, yeah, sure, I know the way things are supposed to be as well as they way things have always been… I just know that there’s more to living in this world and that all things are possible – even if it’s something I might not be interested in doing, oh, like climbing a mountain. Nah, not something I’d want to… but I can appreciate those who will do it and, with eyes and mind wide open (or as open as I can get them), I can see how and why it would be fun to those who will climb that mountain.

And I’m good with it. I think they’re crazy but, yeah, still good with it because they’re not letting “the impossible” or the “that shouldn’t ever be done” mindset stop them from realizing their potential and purpose in life.

Do you see what I see? Have you been zapped? Not being zapped enough? Got zapped but “that’s not the way things are supposed to be” managed to insulate you from the full culture shock zapping? Got zapped and didn’t like what you saw? I get it – again, you don’t have to like what your opened eyes and mind might see – but if you can understand it, well, that works even if what you saw doesn’t work for you… but you also understand that it might.

It’s not really all that confusing although it sounds that way and it’s never easy to let go of things dogmatic so that you can see thing with better eyes. It’s not so much as respecting one’s right to go to hell in their own handbasket as it is understanding that people can and will do this and as it suits their need to do so – and understanding it in a very non-judgemental way.

Because the world just doesn’t not really work in that “this is the way it’s supposed to be” or “this is how it’s always been done” way. Do you see it? Been zapped enough to be able to see it?

Hello again, world! Wow… what a trip you’ve been taking me on, eh? And the most coolest thing is that I know I’m not on this eye-opening trip by myself or the only one getting zapped and culture-shocked.



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