I saw Collaredmichael’s name a few moments ago and it reminded me that he had asked why I didn’t write about sex with women so I decided to write more about that aspect and beginning with:
It’s sex with women. Great. Magnificent. Sometimes a bit of a cluster fuck and sometimes like two ships not only passing in the night but two ships not being in the same body of water. Exhilarating. Frustrating. Nothing unusual going on here.
Ah, but I realized a very long time ago that my… penchant for having sex with men changed the way I’d have sex with women because, even if only in my own opinion, there is nothing that will teach you about having sex with women and what they don’t like than having sex with a man. Nothing.
You suck enough dick and you get to learn and understand why some women flat out hate doing it and don’t even ask them to finish it. You get fucked by guys enough and you find out two things – how good it can feel… and how fucked up it can be. So since I know that sex with some guys bears out the fact that they’re assholes, when having sex with women, my “goal” is to not be an asshole. Whether I’m actually successful or not isn’t at issue but, again, when you learn what some women universally don’t like, it pays to do your best to not do that which they don’t like.
Yeah… doing what they do like – and being consistent in the doing – is always a challenge and I think that guys who’ve never had sex with a guy can’t – or don’t – understand why some women behave the way they do, oh, like when you’re having a field day and thinking that everything you’re doing to her is rocking her world when, in fact, she’s just lying there and waiting for you to get done so she can go do what she really wanted to do or why they fake orgasms or, really, behave in any way other than having a grand time getting laid.
But, sure – sex with women is all that and then some: Why wouldn’t it be? Sure, there’s a lot of pressure to deliver and being aware of her expectations, likes and dislikes and, oh, yeah, the fact that any of that can change faster than you can blink makes having sex with women pretty daunting and then there’s always that thing about many of them when and where, for whatever reason, they just decide that they’ve had enough and no one will ever have sex with her again unless, of course, she changes her mind… but don’t hold your breath on that one.
See, there are some who seem to think that if a guy is bisexual, his total sexual focus is on sex with men and for some guys, that’s legit… I’m not one of those guys, though. I’ve gone through my life to date having people throw the “do you prefer women or men” loaded question to which, when I deigned to answer it, I’d reply, “Yes!” Or I’d have to qualify my answer by saying that, sure, I’d take the pussy… but I wouldn’t turn down the dick. Which would I prefer to have first? Whomever I get my hands on first or if she’s the closest, well, my dear, allow me to make my acquaintance!
I’ve even had some folks suggest that because I’m bisexual, I’m not a real and true lover of women and sex with them and my response is to laugh my ass off and, often, hysterically so. Some even think that I’m bisexual because of some inability to have sex with women or have suffered a great many failures in this endeavor. Um… not. Like any other guy, I either succeed or I fail – you get used to it even though failure does suck and in a very not-so-good way. And when some gay guy would suggest or insist that I just give up having sex with women, um, well, let’s just say that there have been times that my response to such a ridiculous thing hasn’t been very nice or polite.
Pussy is good even if their owners are “clinically” and deliciously insane. I make no bones about the fact that I’d rather eat pussy than to suck dick even though eating pussy is actually harder… but do I love to practice! I know some bi guys start to feel some kind of way about sex with women but, again, I’m not – and have never been – one of those guys. I have, in fact, only turned down pussy twice in my entire life, once because I knew girlfriend’s coochie was very sick and another time when my gut instinct said that having sex with her would be a very major mistake.
Otherwise, if a woman wants to have sex, I’m all for it… why wouldn’t I be? Is it about being up to the challenge? Yes… and no because if I’ve learned nothing, I’ve learned that all you can do is the best you can do and that sometimes, your best ain’t gonna be good enough. Some guys, when having sex with other guys, don’t bother to ask about… anything and even with my experiences with women, being with guys drove the point home to me that if you wanna have a good chance of pleasing her – and not making her regret her decision to let you do her, it’d be nice to find out where all of her buttons are. Not that she’s gonna tell you but if you don’t ask, you won’t know but, sure, sometimes it’s fun trying to figure out where her buttons are and she’s doing her best to hide them… and not so much fun when you can’t find them because she’s doing an excellent job of hiding them.
Like I said to Collaredmichael when he asked about this, I don’t say much about it because, to me, it’s just business as usual as far as I’m concerned. I’ve had sex with a lot of women across the country and even a bit world-wide. It’s not totally about successes and failures… it’s about doing something that I really do love and that’s being naked with a woman and doing my best to please her while enjoying the sheer intimacy of it all.
Because I’m thinking that if I didn’t enjoy it, maybe I’m really gay… and I know that I’m not and, no offense, wouldn’t want to be. I can’t and won’t give up women and pussy because I love it too much because, duh, you’re supposed to love it. I’ve wowed women… and I’ve failed to do so – c’est la vie. Learned a long time ago to not promise shit I might not be able to deliver so the only thing I’ll say to this is I will do the best I can if you’ll let me and if you’re game to give it a shot, I’m game… unless there’s a clear reason why I shouldn’t be… but that’s with anyone.
If I’ve learned anything about sex, it’s not to have a lot of expectations and that includes not even expecting to have sex in the first place. Again, sex with men has taught me a wealth of things about having sex with women and that if you can’t make love to a woman’s emotions, you’re pretty hosed where, with a lot of guys, you just have to address their lust and whatever crazy shit they may have going on in their head. It’s not easy to make love, fuck, and/or have sex with women. We know it and women know it, too.
But it sure the fuck is fun to try and chances are that if there comes a time when I wouldn’t want to have sex with a woman, you can be sure that I’m no longer among the living. You know that saying guys tend to say about a woman always having a place to sit? Yep – you want that pussy eaten? Lemme at it. I can do it several times a day, every damned day and I might not even want to stick it in you (but I will if ya want me to).
Even that “simple” thing is sheer joy to do. Back in the early days, women would loudly exclaim, “You gotta lick it before you can stick it!” and I was like, “Okay… hang on to your hat…” It’s the intimacy in being with a woman that really can’t be all that well experienced with men and, no, don’t even ask me to explain that because I can’t and I’ve never been able to. But it’s an intimacy that I love and, to be blunt, there ain’t a dick anywhere on the planet that can replace a woman in my sexual life.
Because pussy is damned good and women are a joy to have sex with even if/when I fail and I know I will so I don’t let it bother me. I don’t try to do more than I’m capable of doing and, here in my older age, eh, I’m not trying to impress anyone.
I just want that very special intimacy that only a woman can bring to the table whether she’s handing me my head or, yeah, doing her very best “dead body” imitation. The only thing I “expect” is for a woman to allow herself to be pleased and, yeah, that’s the hard part because I learned – thanks to having sex with men – that there’s a whole lot of reasons why a woman won’t really allow this. The thing, I think, that makes sex with women so… special to me is that I do, in fact, know what they know about having sex with men.
I read in a few places that not all women have a hatred for bisexual men and that many really do like the fact that the guy is bisexual and I think it just might be due to the fact that, yeah, we know about men and dicks just like women do, what’s good about it and what is so totally fucked up about it that and I think bi guys are a lot more open-minded about sex (I know I am). I don’t write a whole lot about my sexcapades with women but, yeah, maybe I should in order to provide a more… complete picture about male bisexuals. And it’s not that other bi guys aren’t fans of the coochie because they most certainly are; it’s just that sex with men is… so out of the box and so much so that there are many people who can’t wrap their heads around why bi guys love dick so much or even why they’d want to go there in the first place.
Some of that is because of sex with women – and it’s painful for me to say this but it is true and even I’m aware of this… discrepancy – how could I not be? But to give up women and pussy? Not gonna happen. Ever. No matter how many times I fail.
Way too much fun and way too intimate. Chock full of pitfalls and other roadblocks. It is what it’s always been. And, yes, I do think that anyone who doesn’t like pussy needs to have their head checked – but that’s me.