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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: “Wow…”

14 Jun

That was the first thing “Gary” was able to say as I sat up, let his cock fall from my mouth, and licked my lips to savor the salty-sweet taste of his cum and all while taking a very close look at him.

He was beet-red, breathing heavily, hair plastered on his head an in an amusing way; he looked… surprised with the classic dinner plate eyes that were blinking pretty fast and jaw dropped in… disbelief? It was hard to read him at this moment but what I was seeing wasn’t anything I hadn’t seen before with guys experiencing a blow job from a guy for the first time.

“You okay?” I asked as I watched his chest rise and fall as well as seeing the moment his wide open eyes lost that “glassy” look.

“Yeah, wow,” he said again. “I had no idea this could be so… intense.”

I wanted to laugh at this because I knew that I had taken it easy on him; subjecting him to how intense I could really get when sucking dick could have had some unwanted reactions.

“Hmm, did I mention that it can be one hell of an experience?” I asked.

“You did… I just didn’t think it would be like that,” he said.

And I wasn’t all that surprised that he said that because a lot of guys somehow have it in their head that having a guy suck them off is so very different. Before the fact, I did my “duty” and talked at length to him about what he was getting himself into when he let me know that he was very interested in finding out what it was like to be sucked by a guy and do some sucking himself and his hope that I was “the guy” who’d be willing to show him the ropes, as he had put it.

Another of those… disconnects. I can tell you what to expect but sometimes it doesn’t really prepare a guy all that much since a lot of guys are very much of a mind that a guy sucking their dick is so very different from a gal doing it… and even when I had told Gary that the only real difference was who was doing it. I had listened to him telling me how long he’d been trying to do this and how many times he had failed in the past; I could tell by the way he was talking that he was unsure about whether or not he really wanted to experience this as well as expressing his concerns about not being able to “return the favor” and as he said he also wanted to experience.

“We’ll worry about that later,” I had said. “Let’s get you through the first part and the first thing I’d like for you to do is to relax and just breathe normally.”

Gary had no problem being naked with me or seeing me just as naked; some guys can’t get past this part easily but as I sat next to him and as he was lying on his back, my biggest concern was him being tense and breathing rapidly enough for him to hyperventilate and pass out… and I’d seen that happen quite a few times.

“There is nothing I’m going to do that a woman hasn’t done to you,” I said. “Don’t worry about cumming in my mouth because that’s exactly what I want you to do so if you needed “permission,” it’s given, okay?”

Gary just nodded. I carefully put my hand on his thigh to, one get him used to being touched in this way by a guy but to also feel how tense he was – and he was practically vibrating under my hand which has me saying to him – again – “Relax. Breathe. If you think it’ll help, you can close your eyes and when you’re ready, just say you’re ready, okay?”

“Okay,” he said. “Jesus… I don’t believe this is happening!”

“Remember, you can say “stop” at any time and for any reason,” I reminded him; I had noticed that I didn’t feel his body trembling as much as it was a moment ago and that his breathing was… better. He wasn’t hard… yet but that wasn’t something I found to be unusual.

“Ready,” he said a few moments later. “I don’t fucking believe this…”

“Okay, here goes,” I said quietly. I began by just touching him; his chest and nipples and just feeling my way down his body; I rested my hand on his stomach and felt the muscles there fluttering and said, “Relax…” I looked up at him to see him nod and I really do wish you could have seen the look on his face. I took his dick in hand and used my other hand to cup his balls; that his body reacted like he’d been shocked was expected because, again, a lot of guys just believe that it’s different than being touched this way by a woman.

Then I just went down on him, planting a few kisses on his knob and shaft before taking all of his limpness in and swirling my tongue around; I felt him beginning to harden quickly before he gasped at the contact – so much for him telling me that he didn’t think he’d be able to get it up. I sucked him slowly which ran counter to the way I just wanted to devour him but this was his first time and fully giving in to my own lust, again, could have a negative effect on him.

“God, that feels good,” he said. “Don’t stop.”

So I didn’t, not like I was going to unless he said stop in the way that really meant stop. It didn’t take him very long before his body was automatically fucking into my mouth and I just let him do it as he wanted to while alternating between applying suction or not and letting my tongue just wander over his dick. So far, Gary was handling this very new thing and, I thought, way better than he believed he’d be able to. For me, it was all very comfortable and, in a way, kinda clinical because this wasn’t about me – this was all about him and despite what I was doing to his dick, I was very much paying attention to him for any signs that he was in distress… and signs that I’d seen way too many times before.

“Oh, shit… I’m gonna cum!” he blurted out… and for me, it wasn’t necessary for him to announce that since I’d been feeling those little tremors running through his dick and how often he was softening just a little before getting hard again. I knew he was watching me suck his dick and I didn’t have to look up to know he was so I just nodded and picked up the pace a little and, yeah, even indulging myself by taking him deep over and over. His body was so “out of control” at this point; his breathing was fast and heavy and he was thrusting into my mouth a bit faster. Oh, he was so very close and now it was about shoving him right over the edge.

I felt his dick swell in my mouth and just before I heard him groan and curse; that first shot of cum blasted into my mouth and, oh, my, there was a lot of it; yeah, so much for him saying that he was sure he wouldn’t be able to cum like this. I just held him in my mouth as he emptied his balls, moaning, groaning, cursing and going back to fucking my mouth a little until he was back to being limp in my mouth.

That’s when I sat up and looked at him and heard him say, “Wow…” Yep, he was going to be fine… but this wasn’t over with and I’m not talking about him sucking my dick. I’ve seen guys be in this moment then the clarity returns and, sometimes, that’s when the shit hits the fan as the guy realizes what just happened and how totally forbidden it is and for some, when this moment goes bad, it really goes bad. And it’s part of my duty to make sure it doesn’t go bad and with Gary, it began with me asking him if he was okay.

We talked for a few minutes because I found it helps some guys to deal with what just happened when they can tell me how they’re feeling and what, if anything, they might have been thinking. You might think, “What is there to talk about?” and in a way, you’d be right but, again, unless you’ve seen this go horribly wrong, just letting the guy talk things out is a good thing. When I tell you that I’ve seen guys suddenly break down and have a crying fit or, jeez, throw up, I’m not even kidding about that; I’ve seen guys have full-blown panic attacks and very major guilt trips.

For Gary, none of the bad stuff appeared… but I knew that this didn’t mean that once he had the time to really think about it, it could pay him a visit and exactly why I had made it clear that if he had any problems later on, he should call me. For now, Gary was fine and that’s all that mattered. Still, there was yet another moment of truth waiting for him and he knew it because he had asked, “I guess it’s my turn to do you, huh?”

“Not if you don’t want to or can’t,” I said. I had let him know that sometimes and after a guy cums, whatever else he had plans on doing might not happen because they were no longer in the mood to do anything else.

“It’s only fair, right?” he asked.

“It’s not about being fair at this moment,” I said. “You’re going through something a lot of guys have major problems going through and if you find that you can’t or don’t want to suck me, then I’m not expecting you to and I’m more than understanding.”

“How can you be so cool about this?” he asked.

“Because I have to be,” I said. “I’ve seen way too many guys have their first experience and the other guy has left them hanging or some other dastardly shit like that… and I’m not trying to be that guy – I do have a reputation to uphold.”

“Just give me a minute, okay?” he asked.

“Take your time,” I said. “You’ll know if you’re ready or not and, again, if you aren’t, it’s no big deal.”

I thought I could see the moment in his eyes when he decided to suck me and just before he politely asked if I’d lay flat for him, which I did and without taking my eyes off of him because experience had taught me that if a guy didn’t freak out being sucked, when attempting to suck a dick, that’s when the freak-out can happen.

“I’m not sure what to do,” he said, looking up and back at me.

“Remember what I said? That easiest way is to go about it as you’d want someone to do it to you?” I reminded him. “You don’t have to just go for it in one fell swoop; you can do what I did and just touch me until you feel comfortable and ready. Don’t worry – you can touch me in any way you want to.”

“Right,” he said… and he started touching me, tentatively at first, but with growing confidence. I didn’t laugh – and like I wanted to – when he asked me to turn over so he could “massage” my back and mess with my butt cheeks for a moment or two before asking me to turn back over. For me, it was important to just let him do whatever he felt like doing at this point and not do or say anything that might be perceived as putting any pressure on him. By this time, I was seriously hard and I watched him just staring at my dick for a long moment before he wrapped his hand around me and cupped my balls – and almost exactly what I’d done to him.

“I don’t believe I’m about to do this,” he said – either to me or to himself or maybe all of the above. At this point, it was important for me to stay still as he worked it all out in his head to make the go/no decision and I actually felt him “flinch” a little as the decision was made and he lowered his head and kissed the head of my dick, then licked it, and then took it into his mouth and, yeah, I gasped despite not wanting to do or say anything that might freak him out in this moment.

He wound up taking a bit too much of me and it prompted me to say to him, “Never try to do more than you’re able to do, okay?”

He nodded his understanding and kept sucking me until it was becoming difficult for me to stay still along with some moaning and groaning of my own and interspersed with telling him how good it felt and that sentiment was no bullshit confidence builder. The longer he sucked me, the more confident and, dare I say, bold he got; at one point, he stopped sucking me to suck my balls which, honestly, I didn’t expect but, again, this was about what Gary wanted to do more than anything I might have wanted. I could feel “the pressure” building up inside of me and more so when I really don’t know what it is about guys who are new to sucking dick that just makes me want to lose it in a hurry.

“You’re gonna make me cum,” I said to him and as I had promised I would. In my experiences, there is nothing that can be worse for a first time guy than to suddenly wind up with a mouthful of cum and one that he didn’t know was, well, coming. This is also that moment when a new guy has the option to stop or keep going… and I never really know what he’s gonna do; I’ve been with guys who prefer not to get that mouthful, get the warning, and they just keep going anyway or, yep, they stop. No biggie either way because, once more, this is about him.

Gary nods and moans his understanding of the warning… and kept at it until all pretense of being in control of myself got kicked to the curb – and I came in his mouth. I can tell you that it’s very difficult to do this and keep an eye on the new guy for any signs of distress but I somehow managed it and saw that… look he got on his face and that “chipmunk cheek” thing that some guys do in this moment; he was deciding whether the taste agreed with him or not and also deciding to spit it out – and as I told him he could – or swallow it – and I had told him that he didn’t have to. Gary had a moment as he swallowed and for a moment, I was “afraid” that he was going to throw up… and on me – yep, that’s happened before and it ain’t pretty.

But he didn’t and to his credit, swallowed my cum and kept sucking me until I got soft.

“Did I do okay?” he asked and I knew he was asking because he did think he’d be any good at doing this, to which I had said that the only way to find out is to do it.

“You did okay and then some,” I said honestly and truthfully.

“It’s not that bad,” he said.

“What isn’t?” I asked.

“Doing it and, um, tasting it,” he said. “I just hope you liked it.”

“I did and, to be honest, I’m not sure if you were being truthful when you said you’d never done this before,” I replied. Yeah, I know he hadn’t but I’ve seen guys take to this instantly and like they’ve been doing it all of their lives and while it took him a few moment to adjust to it, yeah, it was like this wasn’t new to him at all… plus I wanted to make him laugh, which he did.

“Wow, that was… something,” he said as he lay down next to me. “So now what?”

“That depends on you,” I said. “How are you feeling?”

“Good. Excited. Tired.” he said. “I had hoped that this would be everything I thought it would be, you know?”

“Yeah, I know… and was it?” I asked. This is a key moment and one where guys tend to beat themselves up over doing something that they wanted to do but knew they weren’t supposed to.

“It was and thanks, before I forget,” he said. “I don’t know why it took me so long to actually do this!”

“A lot of guys say that,” I said with a laugh but, then again, I knew he’d say something to that effect.

“Um, ah, do you think we can do this again?” he asked.

“If you want to, it’s fine with me,” I said. “This is your moment.”

And, yes, he wanted to go again and for both of us, it was better than the first time; it never fails to amaze me how some guys just adapt so quickly to this and I gave him major props for wanting to 69 this time although I had suggested that side by side would be best… at this point.

We’d showered together afterward and we talked or, really, he talked and I listened and this, too, is something I’ve always deemed to be so very important after a first experience. The funny part was when he noticed how closely I was paying attention to him and he said, “You’re looking at me like you’re expecting me to explode or something!”

“That’s not far from the truth,” I said. “Like I told you, I’ve seen guys go through some major shit after their first time and none of it is good so it’s important to me to know that before I leave, you really are okay.”

“I feel good and okay,” he said after a moment of thought. “As a matter of fact, what are you doing tomorrow?”

I laughed and said, “I have a sneaking suspicion about what you wouldn’t mind doing.”

“That obvious, huh?” he asked and joined in the laughter.

This was a good “wow” moment for Gary and one that I was glad I was able to provide. You just don’t toss a guy into this and expect him to sink or swim and when it’s likely he’s going to sink. You take the time to explain it all and in as much detail as possible so that the new guy can make an informed decision on whether he really wants to do this or not. You always give them the chance to just walk away and without fear of repercussion as well as not putting any pressure on them to do anything at all. It takes a lot for a guy to think about taking the plunge and even more to actually go through with it and that must always be respected and appreciated. I remember Gary telling me after our fourth or fifth time together that I could have done anything I wanted to him…

And I told him that while I appreciated that, it would have been the wrong thing to do at the time because, first and foremost, none of that first time was about me other than wanting to provide it and in the most enjoyable way possible. When he asked me why that was so important to me, I told him this:

“Because I didn’t have the benefit of someone explaining it all to me; I got… tossed in and it was probably pure luck that I was more than okay with it,” I said. “I just don’t think it’s right to just throw a guy into the deep end and not knowing or caring if he can swim or not because, like I told you, I’ve seen this go very, very wrong and that’s not gonna happen on my watch if I can help it.”

A very immoral act but one done responsibly… because no other way makes any damned sense.

 
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Posted by on 14 June 2021 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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