Today’s thoughts are… try it – you might like it.
I’ve often had some pretty good moments of laughing to hear people going on and on about how much they love sex and all kinds of sex but if you asked them if they’d do it in the same sex way, oh, hell, no! That shit’s nasty!
And me asking them, “Then how can you really say that you love all kinds of sex? Perhaps you should be more specific, huh?”
Yeah, I tend to piss people off with this one because when I say that I love sex, well, our definitions might differ because I don’t much care if the other person is male or female. Then again, this is one of the hallmarks and highlights of bisexuality. The emotional stuff is nice but, yeah, the sex. Cookies getting crumbled. Being able to leave any inhibitions at the door, get naked and get some.
I go back to how I started this: Try it – you might like it. If I had a dollar for every person who’s immediate reaction to this was, “I know I wouldn’t like it!” goodness – I’d need a warehouse to store all of the Lamborghinis I could by. And then rattling their apple cart by asking, “How you do know you wouldn’t?”
It’s… a trick question because I know the answer: They were told to not like it. So was I. Some get into how different it is and, well, okay, it is different but only in the context that you’re not supposed to have sex like that. Anatomical differences? Sure. Duh. But one day when I’d given a guy a blowjob and not twenty minutes later, I was eating a girl’s pussy, I realized that the act isn’t all that different but who you’re giving head to is different.
Duh. Finding out that, okay, females aren’t normally born with a dick but that doesn’t mean that a babe couldn’t fuck me since, you know, they make toys for that purpose and, well, yeah. Damn girl, you tore my ass up! Not the same as having the real thing in my ass but it had occurred to me that if I can do it to a woman, I can do it with a man and they can do it to me, too.
In all fairness, I got the same “don’t ever do that shit” stuff crammed into my head that a lot of people had to endure growing up. I… found out that it’s not quite right but as I’ve said a gazillion times, I also found out why sex should never be done in the same sex way of things. I understand it and like everyone is able to understand it; I just don’t pay any attention to it because, um, getting some dick can be good, too. I know that I have this… quirk that says, yes, who is about to give me da bizness is important but at the top of the ladder, it’s what that makes having sex da bomb.
There are, sad to say, men and women that I wouldn’t have sex with. Ever. But if we’re cool enough with each other, give me a reason to say no to you which is to say don’t give me a reason to not want to have sex with you. I get that people have… hangups about sex. I… don’t have any to speak of. I’m fairly uninhibited although experience has taught me that there are some things that are best left alone and a few more things, oh, like watersports, that’s just nasty – and that’s saying something given the kinds of sex I’ve had.
Fielding the question so many times of, “I don’t know what you get out of having sex with a dude!” and to the extent that my warehouse for cars would include more than the Lamborghinis I love so much. What I get out of it is (a) I get to have sex and (b) I get to cum. I get to tap into some emotions that I’ve learned that some people are afraid of; it doesn’t matter why they are but the fact they fear the emotions sex can bring to the table does matter.
Like, feeling vulnerable. Exposed in a way that must always be guarded against. Not really being in control of yourself. Ugh, right? Us guys who throw it down with other guys talk about… feeling bitchy and girly. I know the feeling all too well and it’s a motherfucker and a half because, well, guys aren’t supposed to feel like they’re… female. I get that connection because every time I’ve had sex with a female, I can understand what they’re feeling because I’ve been on that end of the dick, too.
The many people I’ve encountered who have emphatically said, “I would never do some shit like that! There is no scenario in the world that would find me doing that shit, let alone liking it!” But then, the impossible happens. Doesn’t really matter, at this point, why it did but, okay, yeah, it did. Some initial responses in the after-action report is… they didn’t like it but I’ve kept at them and not about what they said they didn’t like but why they didn’t like it.
Well, that’s because they weren’t supposed to. They literally mindfucked themselves into believing that they didn’t like it but I’ve gotten them to… be truthful with themselves and, okay, you get on my nerves. It felt good. I came. Are you satisfied?
But the real question is, “Were you satisfied?” I understand the difficulty in admitting that, yeah, you were satisfied but not much how that happened since, you know, you weren’t supposed to have sex like this; you swore that you would never do it and… you did it. I understand how this alone can fuck with someone but, hey, it’s okay – almost everyone goes through this so don’t get to kicking your ass over this particular thing.
Now it’s, “It’s not something I’d do all of the time…” which is laughable because I’m as bi as the day is long and… I don’t do it all of the time. Breaking it down to that which is preferred, like the many guys I know who make it a point to unnecessarily tell me how much they love pussy. Um, dude… duh. I’d be richer than Elon Musk if I had that dollar for every cotton pickin’ time I’ve had to deal with those “which do you prefer” questions. Duh, I’m bi. I prefer both. Let’s not get even get into all the being gay shit, okay? I might have a good downpayment on my own island over this one.
If you’re worried about that stuff, you… miss what’s at the high level of this: Having sex. Or, if only in my own rather biased opinion, there’s some stuff about sex that you don’t understand… because you’re not supposed to. Yep, I know about the horror stories and if I got paid for hearing them, that’ll be more money than I know what to do with. True enough, it doesn’t always go well but that’s part and parcel of having sex; sometimes, it’s all that and then some and sometimes it just isn’t. You really can’t please everyone and just like everyone isn’t going to be able to please you.
It’s okay to be the horniest person in the room… as long as you’re being smart about it and, importantly, you learn from your mistakes and, even more important, you don’t allow those mistakes to fuck with your joy of getting your rocks off and crush into powder. Shit, I’ve failed to please but the overall question asked and answered is: Did I have fun trying? You bet I did. I feel bad when I fail to please and I don’t accept failure all that well but I do enough to know that I have failed; I will fail, too. Learn from it and don’t shy away from it but continue to strive to do the best you can do because, really, that’s all you can do, right?
I remember the woman I was friends with and… a female friend of hers wanted them to have sex. She pretty much lost her shit because she never faced this situation. A woman eating her pussy? Her eating pussy? What the dooflicky fuck! She was terrified and had called me and asked me what she should do. My first question was, “What do you want to do?” She told me what the woman was offering and, okay, women eat pussy, too, and from what I’ve been told, better than most men can. I asked her if she’d ever been eaten and, of course, she had. I said, “This is no different except it’s a woman doing it.”
Oh, what about eating her pussy and she’s never even thought about it? I regaled her with what my father told me about that – don’t ever do it. Ten minutes later, I was eating a girl’s pussy and I didn’t lie to her when I said that it was the strangest thing and having my face down there almost made me barf… but I didn’t and… I ate that pussy. Yummy. Made me feel seriously good doing it and if the girl’s reaction was any indication, she was liking the shit out of it, too. I told her that it might take a moment to get up the nerve to eat this woman’s pussy but if it’s something you really want to do, you just say, “Fuck it…” and… learn how to eat pussy and just like everyone who has ever eaten pussy has had to do.
It’s sex. Duh. She said that she would try but was sure she wouldn’t like it and she would call me one way or the other. Well, folks, she called me at 3 in the morning to tell me that she slept with the woman and… went off the deep end trying to tell me how much she liked all of it. She reminded me of my youngest son; he had a girlfriend who wanted him to eat her and he didn’t have a clue so he came and asked me and I gave him a quick lesson in “Pussy Eating 101 and 102.” He left to go have sex with her. He… was gone for a while and I’d put the whole thing out of my mind.
He comes busting into the house a couple of hours later and literally got right in my face… so I could smell his girlfriend’s pussy on his face. I had to bite myself a few times to keep from laughing at how excited he was. This lady friend was the same way. She went from never even thinking about such a thing to being afraid to go for it to being seriously over the moon about it.
“You could have told me that eating pussy is da shit,” she had said.
“Well, I did tell you that – you didn’t believe me but now you know like I do, huh?” I asked.
I had not one but two poly wives who found out that having sex with a woman… ain’t bad at all. I had them both tell me to my face that I am very good at eating pussy… but not as good as (a) my wife was and (b) as good as they all learned to be with each other. I wasn’t offended at this but this is just another example of someone saying that they would never do some shit like this, wind up doing it and, why did I never do this before now?
Well, because you weren’t supposed to. Ever. And now you know like I do: Going both ways ain’t really as bad as it sounds and as people say it is and they say it is… because they don’t know a whole lot about having sex and how it really can be done but, yep, they’re intelligent and all that and it’s not like they don’t know but they don’t know because they’ve never experienced it.
Try it. You just might like it. Sucking a dick for the first time didn’t scare me; eating pussy for the first time scared the shit out of me. I tried it. Liked it. Okay, loved the shit out of it and, being the nerdy guy I was, I was able to make the connections and at the top of things was… sex. I can admit that I have busted a nut… sucking dick and eating pussy. Whoa… what the fuck? But, upon further review – and there’s always a further review – it spoke to how much I was enjoying what I was doing; I was deep into the moment and I kinda/sorta remember bringing them along with me which, um, isn’t that the “whole point” in having sex? That intimacy? Letting it all hang out and not being afraid to?
And one of the biggest lessons bisexuality taught me: I am responsible for my sexual pleasure first and foremost and that means doing whatever is necessary to take care of that and if, today, it’s sucking a guy off, that works. If it’s getting pussy, that works, too. Not just “any old person” because I learned some lessons about that when I was younger but the “right person” is the person I can like enough to want to have sex with them. Use the big head before using the little one. Having to get a grip on the fact that some guys and gals would have sex with me… and not because I was a wonderful person. Ugh. Ah, but was the sex we had good? Yeah it was so those feelings of being “used and abused” and feeling horribly dirty… went by the wayside because I was learning a lot about… having sex and what it could really mean as opposed to that “fairy tale” shit my parents and other elders had bullshitted me with.
They didn’t so much as lie to me as they didn’t tell me the whole truth of how it can be. But they, too, were brought up to not have anything to do with sex that wasn’t boy/girl, man/woman. I was pissed with both of them for a long time and it wasn’t until I became a father that… I understood why they didn’t tell me all of it. Understanding all the guys and gals who wound up with their own horror stories and it was just because whoever did them made it a nightmare: It was the fact that they weren’t told the whole story about how people can have sex and that some of it – yeah, the gay/lesbian part – really isn’t that bad but, yeah, God said it was.
I’ve told people, “Try it – you might like it!” Whether they do or not is all on them. Understanding that I can tell you everything I know about this and it might be helpful but you won’t ever know if you’d like or hate it… until you give a try and I have always recommended doing it more than once so that you can have something to compared stuff to. I’ve had folks give it a single try and, nope, it’s not for them but that’s understandable because not everyone can be bisexual – lots of reasons for this that I’m not going to get into today. They tried it. Didn’t like it… but I know a lot of people who… came back to it and now they like it. I get that, too.
We used to run around saying some stuff. You never know what you can do until you try. In the 1960s, “Try it – you might like it!” was the word of the times and there were an unimaginable number of people who were trying it and liking it. Yeah, some folks called me a pervert because I went both ways but those who did, well, I knew some shit about how they were getting down that made me look like a prude. Y’all can get all up in that kinky shit… but you give me shit because I suck dick and I’ve been screwed more times than I can remember?
Really? Guys today are clamoring to know what it’s like and I tell them, “If you really want to know, do it and make your own conclusions because it’s the only way you’re ever going to know – and don’t be afraid.” While The Big Three – love, sex, and relationships – is always in play, yeah, the sex. Hoo boy. The shame doesn’t come from having it – methinks it comes in not allowing yourself to having it but I know that we are supposed to be ashamed to love the shit out of having sex.
Fuck that. Yeah, I’m not trying to turn anyone to the bi side. Like mom used to say, “”To each his own,” said the woman who kissed the cow.” Laughed until I cried and hurt something but I understood what that meant. You don’t have to if you don’t want to… but, sure, if you can give a try, by all means – try it – you might like it.
22 March 2023 at 21:42
Well, I love sex too. Except that kind. Or that one. Or that one. Probably not that kind either. Well, no, not that one ever. Why do you think I’m still a virgin?
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22 March 2023 at 22:23
You have me laughing my ass off – I’d be surprised if you were a virgin…
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22 March 2023 at 22:26
I’m not. But the point is valid and fit, and I worded it special to make you laugh. I had a friend in high school that was bisexual and made a HUUUUGE deal out of it all of the time. But was a virgin because every type of sex grossed her out and was against her moral compass or something. Then she’d whine about how she was bi and still a virgin. Your whole post made me think of her.
22 March 2023 at 22:43
I knew a couple of girls and guys who were like that, too. Talked the talked, still very virgin. Not even any necking. The moral stuff was at the root of it and if no one else understood them, I did. But they had to know that someone was going to want to check them out; “too many” girls in high school were all about other girls – and for good reason.
23 March 2023 at 13:03
With her, it wasn’t really a moral thing, I don’t think. I personally think that terms like “asexual” were not common enough for her to know about them, so she identified with the complete opposite because it was also “abnormal” in her opinion. Last time I heard anything from her was about 10 years ago, and she still hadn’t done anything except once, and that was heavy petting and she got bored.
23 March 2023 at 15:39
Well, I went to high school in 1970 and having sex was going on like gangbusters and bisexuals were kind of a joke (but really gay) and we were all vying for popularity, making friend, etc.. Like I was popular because (a) I was smart and (2) they found out that I ate pussy. We bisexuals kinda formed our own group and, well, we were having sex with each other in the bisexual way of things but there were those kids who claimed to be bisexual but they’d never had sex, never fooled around, and when asked if they wanted to lose their cherries, cited the moral mandate to wait until they got married to have sex. I don’t recall running into anyone who was asexual but I’d dated girls who were fed up with sex…. until I got them to, at least, let me eat them and, yep, that’s what they were missing when having sex with other guys.
High school was a “weird” time of discovering for a lot of my classmates…