I was reading another blog about how LGBTQ+ seems to be – or is – ignoring the B in their acronym and, as such, not helping things where bisexual visibility is concerned. The author mentioned a lack of media exposure as well and while he’s right about these things, it had me wondering if we, as bisexuals, really need this.
I was bisexual before LGBTQ+ came into existence (duh) and people were being bisexual just the same. I get that when it was established, their original remit was to shine a bright like on all that wasn’t heterosexual but even then, their main focus was on the L and G and, again, their need to get society to accept gays and lesbians was and still is an important issue.
But I gotta ask: What have they done for us lately? I read stuff other people write and they’re disgusted at how LGBTQ+ is just straight up dissing bisexuals along with my thought that a lot of this bisexual erasure shit is, in fact, coming from LGBTQ+ and the overall thought that we, bisexuals, have no place in the organization since, really, their problems aren’t really our problems.
Bisexuals are like the red-headed stepchild.
I question whether or not media exposure is necessary; we see glimmers of bisexuality showing up in movies and on TV; we see news articles where some celebrity has come out as being bisexual and the usual flak over this – are they really homosexual and faking the funk by saying that they’re bisexual?
I don’t see how this media exposure helps the guy or gal who is struggling with their sexuality except maybe to add to their confusion; TV and movies seem to portray bisexuals in ways that the writers and directors think bisexuals behave and, in my opinion, incorrectly so – but I understand there are something things that censors won’t allow to be seen but the main thing here is that bisexuals aren’t any different from anyone else except how they’ve chosen to love, have sex, and form relationships.
Otherwise – and as I’ve said over and over – you can’t look at someone and tell/know that they’re bisexual unless you’re able to ask them if they are – good luck with that one. It wouldn’t be unusual for a bisexual to categorically deny that they are and given the ongoing angst; my mother loved to say that you never give someone a stick to beat you with and bisexuals, and probably unknowingly, take this to heart and only reveal their sexuality to those they feel can be trusted… and who won’t give them a raft of shit about not being wholly heterosexual.
We talk about acceptance in and of bisexuality and, yeah, sure – I can see why it would go a long way if everyone on the planet could accept that bisexuality is real and even normal but changing the mind of the world is never an easy thing to do and while there are changes in progress, it remains a matter of fact that people are being bisexual without this high level acceptance.
Because no matter what the rest of the world is doing, people still have to do what they have to do… and bisexuals keep right on being bisexual. It seems that given our divisive and tribal nature, there will always be people who believe that everyone should be heterosexual and as commanded to and it seems to me that the more this “agenda” gets pushed and insisted upon, it gives bisexuality validity or, again, as I’ve repeatedly asked, what is everyone fussing about if bisexuality isn’t a real-deal thing?
And despite all this fussing, bisexuals are still going about their lives as bisexuals and without LGBTQ+ representation and media exposure. I don’t know and won’t speak for all bisexuals but being one myself, all I want to do is live out the rest of my life and if/when I can indulge in pussy and/or dick, just do what I gotta do to scratch that itch when I get itchy. And I can do that… and I’ve been doing it for over half a century.
And before LGBTQ+ even existed… and probably before the people who created this organization was born. We didn’t need them then… and I question whether we need them today, not that they’ve done a whole lot for bisexuality in my opinion. I recall reading something a while ago that suggested that bisexuals should divorce themselves from LGBTQ+ and form their own organization so that bisexuality issues can be better addressed and without any interference from the lesbian/gay agenda.
What do we want and need? Well, just leave us alone and stop confusing shit more than it already is for us. We want to just go on with our lives and as we see fit and not get all this static when we lean over the fence for some non-heterosexual stuff. If no one else know (or even gives a fuck) that bisexuality is real, we know it’s very damned real. While there are some who are onboard with this media exposure thing and believe that the LGBTQ+ organization really does have our back in all things bisexual, there are many who don’t give a fuck what LGBTQ+ is or isn’t doing.
They just want to go about their lives. Again, if a bisexual leans across the fence to indulge in some same-sex stuff, they just wanna be able to do it and discretely so – you never give someone a stick to beat you with and with all this angst and mudslinging going on, getting beaten is almost guaranteed.
All that’s really been done is to put bisexuals in a very bad light by applying a lot of stereotypical bullshit and bullshit that was once applied to homosexuals. Go ask a woman if she’d date a bisexual guy and listen to her go off about how she wouldn’t… but the thing she probably doesn’t know is that she has probably dated a bi guy and didn’t know it. Why?
Because bi guys aren’t really all that different from straight guys except for the dick thing. Ask a guy if he’d date a bi gal and you might get a different response and answer but some men might say that they wouldn’t… and all because of all the bullshit being stirred up and thrown all over the place about bisexuals not being able to commit to being monogamous and the implication that if you get involved with a bisexual, they’re gonna cheat on you and as a matter of course.
And, perhaps, deliberately overlooking the fact that people cheat on each other and regardless to sexuality. But I get it: If you’re trying to denounce something, you’re never going to say anything good about that which you’re trying to make go away.
They’re slamming the disease card on the table and giving everyone the impression that if you have sex with a bisexual, you’re instantly going to catch something fatal and die… and perhaps deliberately overlooking the fact that STDs don’t give a fuck if you’re straight, bi, or gay; if you get exposed to one, well, you’ve been exposed. They don’t talk about the STD rates for heterosexuals… except to infer that if it’s on the rise, you can bet your ass that a bisexual had something to do with it.
It’s so bad that people think that all bisexual men get fucked in the ass when, in fact, a lot of bisexual men don’t engage in anal sex; they’re happy campers just to be able to suck cock but all the recent drama about this implies and infers that if you suck a dude’s dick, you’re just gonna get infected with something.
And, perhaps, deliberately overlooking the fact that you can’t catch something from someone if they’ve not been exposed to it. Let’s talk about HIV for a moment. There a new category called “undetectable” and I’ll admit that when I looked into this and first heard it, it was confusing. What it means is that a person can have HIV… but there’s not enough of the virus present to become full-blown HIV. And I’m still thinking, “What the fuck? How is that even possible?”
Well, they explain it – go Google it – and, okay, it is whatever it is but it still makes sense to me that you can’t get HIV from someone who hasn’t been exposed to it… unless there’s another vector of exposure that’s not being talked about. What are they saying? Are they saying that, somehow, the virus might be present in everyone, that it’s always been there hiding in the bushes and just waiting to go live? And because it’s “dormant,” if you test someone, there’s not enough of the virus present to officially say that someone has HIV?
And if any of this is scaring the shit out you and where bisexuals are concerned, well, now you understand the shit we have to put up with… and shit that LGBTQ+ doesn’t seem to be addressing on and for our behalf. And don’t get me started on the media; they’re more likely to take stories and/or information about the rise of STDs and just run wild with it… and blame bisexuals for it.
Which, again, makes me wonder why people are insisting that bisexuality isn’t real; it confuses me to see bisexuals – who supposedly don’t exist – getting all the blame for the spread of something that has been a thorn in humanity’s side and probably since Adam laid the pipe to Eve.
There just doesn’t seem to be a point in “highlighting” bisexuality or asking society’s approval and permission for someone to be bisexual. As far as acceptance goes, sure, homosexuals have won some major battles in this… but battles that bisexuals don’t have to deal with and that gets us fingered (and not in a good way) for having a straight privilege.
And, perhaps, deliberately overlooking the fact that when we’re not doing something homosexual, we’re heterosexual and, for many of us, by default; we only act gay when we want to.
And it’s not that people can’t intelligently grasp that if there are straight people and gay people, um, there just could be some people who are both… except they can’t seem to grasp how this is possible and, to me, doesn’t speak well to our level of intelligence. But I get it: We went from “everyone has to be heterosexual” to “You’re either straight or gay!” and we want to keep believing this despite the fact that bisexuals have always been in the picture. They/we know it… and now we get into all that “pick a side and stay there” shit along with “Why don’t you admit that you’re really gay?”
Um, because we’re not really gay? I can only speak for myself and I do so without offense to homosexuals – I wouldn’t want to be 100% gay – it just doesn’t work for me because – and forgive me for crudely saying it – I love pussy too much to want to be a dick-only kind of guy.
What part of this can’t some folks understand? And, again, importantly, what does this say about our intelligence? Do you mean to tell me that you’ve been so mindfucked by the way things are supposed to be that you refuse to see that what you think isn’t really what’s happening and on the real?
And even with greater media exposure and LGBTQ+ deciding to get off their collective asses and rep us like they’re supposed to be doing, doesn’t it make sense that there will still be people who aren’t going to accept bisexuality… and any anymore than they accept homosexuality…
And because they believe that people should only be heterosexual? That what they believe will always trump the reality that’s all around them?
And do you understand why bisexuals just shrug off all of this insanity and keep on being bisexual and as needs want? I, for one and as a bisexual, don’t give a fuck about media exposure or LGBTQ+ even though I do understand what they’re trying to do. As far as acceptance goes, all I need is for those around me to accept that I am what I am if I tell them what I am. If they accept it, fine and if they don’t, well, that sucks… but it’s not ever gonna stop me from being bisexual. In fact, I’m bisexual even when I’m not doing anything homosexual and, again I am no fucking different from anyone else.
I pay bills and all that; I’m retired and disabled so I don’t have to work but, yeah, I did my 20-year career bid. I’ve done the parent thing. I watch TV, play video games, write this blog and a lot of other stuff that everyone else does on a day to day basis. The only difference is when I get my mind so far in the gutter there’s no escape, yep, I’m thinking pussy and dick – not pussy or dick. Why?
Because I learned a long time ago that this is what works for me. As an older bisexual, I am completely dumbstruck over all of this, you know, having come from a time where this shit didn’t exist for bisexuals. No one was paying any attention to us but, yep, we’ve got their attention now and it’s not in a good way and media representation, right along with LGBTQ+ isn’t doing a damned thing to say what’s good about bisexuality.
So fuck them. We don’t need them. We just need to live our lives as we see fit. They say we’re not real and, at least to me, they’re the ones with a problem because, again, bisexuals know good and damned well that bisexualit not only exists, it’s alive and well… and growing among people. Why?
Because it makes sense to be bisexual. Duh.