While perusing Twitter late last night, I was… amused to see that perhaps 90% of what I was looking at was still proclaiming with great enthusiasm that there is such a thing as a bisexual man. All manner of hashtags stating that bisexual men are real and continuing to mention famous men and, in particular, Black men including the late, great Richard Pryor in last night’s tweets.
At first, I was feeling some kind of way about the many tweets stating this, not really bad but a tiny bit annoyed that there’s a need to tell the world something that it already knows although, on the other hand, I think it’s a good thing to see bisexual men announcing their existence… and then the whole thing started getting amusing to me; I’m playing “Elite Dangerous” and in the process of docking at a station with a delivery and chuckling to myself while saying, “Bisexual men are real… who knew?”
And Black bisexual men are real and many of them weren’t and aren’t famous or historical figures; they’re everyday kinds of guys who, unless you knew that they were bisexual, you’d probably never guess it in a million years. This often makes me laugh, shake my head, and roll my eyes because, well, I’m a Black male bisexual and have been for the majority of my life and for those who might not know it (or even care), I’ll be 66 later this year.
Last night I was chatting with Cityman and we’re talking, as usual, about male sexuality and the “sudden” boom and emergence of male bisexuals and, also as usual, I mentioned that there has always been male bisexuals and that nothing anyone has said or done has stopped, prevented, or curtailed men from being bisexual. We briefly touched on how global societies should just give up bitching about men being bisexual and accept that, yep – we’re real and we aren’t going anywhere. We briefly touched the subject how male bisexuality could lend itself to population reduction which, in turn, could ease the current stresses on the environment and natural resources since, um, if we’re “busy” sowing our seed into (and even onto) each other, well, fewer women would be getting pregnant, not that women are rushing out to get pregnant to begin with but, still. Of course, the issue with this is that if no babies are being conceived and born, we’re gonna wind up making human extinct by failing or refusing to reproduce but, nah, that’s not gonna happen.
As usual, we talked about the religious implications which has utterly and continually failed to prevent guys from pulling out their dicks for each other and using them and, briefly, touched on the fact that male bisexuality – and bisexuality in general – has, these days, seriously upset the apple carts of those who insist that bisexuality isn’t real and bisexual men are really gay men in disguise. And there’s no talking about male bisexuality without getting into one of our favorite things to do: Sucking dick. How relatively easy it is to do once one can get up the nerve to do it. The relative simplicity of it and in terms that goes if both guys don’t mind, it doesn’t matter a whole lot. Or that if two guys are hanging out and doing something – watching TV or just talking about any old thing – and one or both of them get horny, well, they can either deal with it among themselves or go through some stuff to find and convince someone else (usually women) that it’ll be in everyone’s best interest if they could have sex.
If anything, it’s… convenient – why wait until later when dicks can be made hard and made soft right now? And if you’re already buds, that just makes it easier because it’s always better the devil you know and all that. Reading more of the many tweets, bi guys who were adding their proclamation to the other’s I’d seen in that moment, expressed great joy at being able to tell anyone who cared to pay attention that they’re bisexual and how it’s made their life better and that there’s really no shame in this at all. I thought, as I continued to scroll and read, that even with all of the shame being attached to being male and bisexual, none of it has done a damned thing to stop men from being bisexual.
Seeing such testimonies is, again, a good thing… but it’s also like preaching to the choir. We know that men can be bisexual; we just don’t wanna accept the reality of it; we want to keep clinging to a standard of male behavior that is more idealistic than anything else, not that being straight is a bad thing or has no real purpose in the whole of our existence: It just doesn’t work like that for all men. As I had said to Cityman during our chat, we’re running around like proverbial headless chickens looking for reasons for why men would want or need to go both ways when the most simplest reason is because we can be and it can be done…
What other reason(s) do we need? If you want to and I want to, well, let’s do this and, yeah, no one has to know that we did and more so when we – and I mean every living, breathing, human being – rightfully state that it’s no one’s business who we’re having sex with or how we’re doing it. Mind your business. Stay in your lane. As I continued to scroll and see pictures of known Black male bisexuals, I felt my eyes rolling on their own over the absurd notion that we’re not real and don’t really exist… but I know why this is presumed (and incorrectly so); we have been known – and for as long as I can remember – to be violently homophobic. I know that there is actually some truth to this… but not a whole lot but it’s still easier for some folks to believe the hype than to accept the truth…
And the truth is that any man can be bisexual if that’s what works for him. I’ve said it before and will keep on saying it: None of the things we think that matters in this does not matter at all from race to age to all other kinds of stuff that, again, we think plays into this… aberrant and illicit behavior. If Guy A wants to and Guy B is on board with it, it’s gonna be on and, later, if one or both of those guys finds themselves between a woman’s legs and giving her da bizness, so what? It is nothing that hasn’t happened before but we wanna act like it’s the most fucked up thing in the world, not because of any inherent risks that comes with – and always has been a part of having sex – but because we’re told not to do things that way.
What upsets the apple cart or, really, just tears the wheels off of the apple cart and complete demolishes it, is the fact that we have, and as long as I can remember, insisted that people are either straight or they’re gay and you can probably see how things get kicked to the curb to find out that there are a lot of people who are both and to whatever degree that might be… and a lot of them are men… and not all of such men are Caucasian, as it turns out… but, again, race has never made a difference in this. I’ve always known this since, well, you know how I know this. I can’t, however, keep from often being dumbstruck at how many people don’t seem to know this or, really, keep refusing to believe it; they are forever stuck in a place that says men aren’t supposed to have sex with each other and they shouldn’t ever have reason to… but the evidence says otherwise since we do know about gay men… but not all men who have sex with each other are gay nor would they want to be since, um, sorry ladies, but pussy is da shit and always will be.
Yes, yes, the whole romance/relationship thing. Nice and all that… not really as necessary and mandatory as it’s being stated these days. Since men have always had the very bad reputation of being able to have sex without all the lovey-dovey stuff going on, male bisexuality isn’t that far of a departure from our disliked behavior but, sure – if Guy A and Guy B can agree to be in a relationship, they can do that… but the relationship doesn’t define them. Most folks would see them both as being gay and, welp, looks are deceiving, aren’t they? Most folks would see them as being in love with each other or otherwise having great affection for each other when, um, the reality just might be that them being “an item” just makes having sex much more convenient and is much better – and deemed safer – than having to run around to find a guy to have sex with and having to vet him and all that good stuff.
And the bottom line is that even if romance and relationships are being mandated, it still hasn’t and won’t stop Guy A from meeting Guy B and the two of them deciding that it would be nice if they could go somewhere, get each other’s dick hard, and do something to make them soft again with a creamy ending… and neither of them are really and truly gay since, um, again, if they’re able to, they won’t hesitate to take a willing woman to bed and many bisexual men would rather do that than to get some dick but, sure, if they can get some, why the hell not?
It just keeps making me think that if there are people who continue to believe that no man can or should be bisexual, they seriously do not know a whole lot about men, not like they think they do. And just because you might think that because it’s not something you’d get into, well, sorry – that doesn’t mean shit other than it being something you wouldn’t do. Public opinion is raising all kinds of hell about bisexual men… and none of it means a damned thing; it’s never stopped men from being bisexual and it will never stop men from being bisexual and acting like we’re not real or otherwise don’t exist is, bluntly, pretty stupid. The “scariest” thing, I think, comes in the form of something I used to hear a lot:
“You don’t look like the type.” Well, who really does? I often think that the real ruckus isn’t over men being bisexual – it’s not being able to tell if a guy is or not. Not because we’re all in hiding but because there’s no sure-fire way to tell if a guy is bisexual or not… and not all of us are of a mind to tell you that we are; mind your business and stay in your own damned lane, aight? I’ve said in the past that you can literally be standing next to a bi guy and have no clue that he’s bi and, yep, you can know a guy and unless he told you he was bi, you wouldn’t know it or even suspect it.
But we are very real, thank you very much. We do exist and we’ve always existed and will continue to exist. Cityman mentioned some intergenerational stuff during our conversation and, true enough, male bisexuality is more of a “thing” among the last and current generations than it was back in my generation and by that I mean it’s more acceptable and one of those “I don’t know what the big deal is” things. Some think it’s trendy to be bi but even when looked at in this way, eh, so what if Gary and Lucas are having sex with each other even though they both have girlfriends or are laying the pipe to some babe? Nothing to see here. I had to learn to cut through the bullshit… and more “modern” versions of male bisexuals just don’t pay any attention to the bullshit. They know it just like I know it – it just doesn’t mean shit to them to be fussing over something that guys are known to do or, hey, if you want to, so do I!
Just as easy as that; boys forever being boys. And nothing has ever stopped us from having sex with each other and nothing ever will and if we can get some pussy, too? Doesn’t even get any better than that. We are real. We exist. Accept the truth of this. Or not but like I said, if you’re a non-believer, well, hmm. No offense but it doesn’t matter if you don’t believe we’re real because that, too, isn’t going to do anything to stop men from being bisexual.
I ain’t chopped liver, after all, and I know I’m real and I do happen to exist… and I’m not the only one.