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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Next, What to Do?

So you’ve gotten past your “Oh, shit!” moment and have realized that the only thing that’s really changed about yourself is your thoughts about sex and sexuality although, admittedly, there still may be some “issues” still running around between your ears.  Perhaps you’ve decided that there’s nothing you can – or want to – do about this but maybe this has been on your mind enough and you’ve been thinking about what you’d like to do about this, you know, if you could.

Another of those “way back in the day” moments.  When two guys decided they wanted to “do it to each other,” it was accepted that “it” was pretty much doing everything, from playing with each other’s dick, to sucking each other’s dick, to dicks going in each other’s butt or, at the very least, dicks going between butt cheeks… then repeat if necessary or possible.

I’d have to say that guys then didn’t have much in the way of preferences other than wanting to do it and it wasn’t like guys were in the habit of asking what one liked (or being asked); again, “doing it” was a package deal so if there was a question to be asked and answered, it was usually, “Where can we do this?”  “What” was the whole nine yards; “why” was kinda self-evident; “when” was usually right this moment (but dependent upon the answer to “where”).

Experiences and time would eventually start to shake things out into “I like this” and “I don’t like that” which also included that, “Put it in my butt – but don’t stick it in too far” and the “I’ll suck your dick – but don’t shoot in my mouth” things that would crop up from time to time.

No Internet and the only form of porn were paperback books so if one was clever enough to swipe their father’s stash (or their mom’s stash), the only visualization of the sexual acts you were reading was whatever your mind could conjure up; other than word of mouth, there wasn’t much in the way of helpful information other than knowing what guys liked to do it and what guys didn’t or were too afraid to give it a shot.

There was almost always – and usually – that one moment when one boy would look at another boy and ask, “Have you ever done it with another boy?”  If the answer was yes, the next question would usually be, “Do you wanna do it?” and if the answer was no, um, the same question would be asked – and the answer could still be no… but sometimes it could be, “I don’t know…”

One might not have had any specific preferences when it came to doing it outside of wanting to do it out of that combination of raging hormones and the thrill of doing something that we all knew we weren’t supposed to be doing.

Today, guys have the “advantage” of being able to determine and decide what things they’d want to do once they get past that “Oh, shit!” moment – and thanks to the wealth of information the Internet can make available as well as an understanding of what gay men do when they do it to each other –  and deciding that doing just might be a good idea… but what to do?

And a lot of guys ask this question, believe it or not; it’s one thing to know what two guys could do to, for, and with each other, something else to figure out which of those things will turn out to be just what the doctor ordered.  It’s one thing to know that guys suck each other’s dick, another to imagine one’s self doing it and the same goes for having anal sex and even jerking each other off.

Guys ask this question of me and I’ve answered their question with a question:  What would you want to do?  Some guys would ask this question and it’s a rhetorical one – they already know what they wanna do but the question is more of a… confirmation of sorts so a conversation about what can be done begins and at a basic level:  Mutual masturbation, oral sex, anal sex, all of the above, any combination of those things which could also include kissing and cuddling (or not).

Guys today are able to sort out their preferences before they ever do it for the first time; they’ve already decided that they’re going to be a top (the guy in the male-dominant sexual role) or a bottom (the guy in the female-submissive sexual role) and, yeah, sometimes, a guy will start out wanting to be in both roles and as he feels in the moment.

What gets… amusing is that some guys do, in fact, have an idea of what they want to experience… but will still ask what it’s like to do it, oh, like sucking dick, for example.  Now, you’d think this would be a no-brainer and more so for any guy who’d ever had his dick sucked by a woman and for some guys it is a no-brainer – just not for every guy.  Having your cock sucked is one thing… being the one doing the sucking a whole different thing and, of course, there’s the whole matter of what to do when the guy cums – swallow it, wear it, avoid it at all costs and by any means necessary.

Guys are well-versed about fucking coochie and you’d think that there wouldn’t be much of a disconnect about sticking their dick in a guy’s ass – and more so if they’d ever had anal sex with a women – but, again, there’s this perceived difference but the main thing about this is a sense of revulsion because, well, we know what that orifice’s main purpose is, don’t we?  On the receiving end of the high hard one, again, we see that knowing that guys get boned as being one thing… wholly different when you’re the one with the hankering to get boned because the other thing we know, even via word of mouth, is that, um, it can hurt going in.

True enough, some guys prepare themselves for this moment by using toys, from butt plugs to dildos to prostate stimulators and while this is all well and good, most guys find that while using toys can get them used to being penetrated, having the real thing in their butt is rather different; it’s one thing to do this to yourself, another when you’re not really in control of that moment and there’s a very horny guy on the other end of the dick that’s about to meet your acquaintance.

So we see that when it comes to deciding what to do, there are choices… but choices that aren’t always easy to make because along with all the things two guys can do, there’s also a laundry list of reasons why guys shouldn’t do any of them.  One major one is, “What if someone finds out I (add an M2M thing here)?”  Yes, there’s the whole “What if I catch something?” thing to consider but it’s nothing a case of condoms can’t take care of.

Guys find that it’s easy to sit back and think about all of this but to get to the point where one does those things they’ve been pondering just might provide some added “stress” to the list of things to stress about in this, up to and including wondering, even here in the 21st century, if doing whatever they’re thinking about is going to make them gay.

Yeah, guys back in the 1960s were worried about this, too, so that hasn’t changed a whole lot.  Sometimes I think that guys looking and/or waiting for their first experience tends to suffer from an informational overload – just too much information to process but it is important for a guy to process all of that information and to the best of their ability because one thing they may discover is that the best thing for them to do is…

Nothing.  Certainly, there are a lot of reasons for a guy not to give into the great urge to get out there and do something about what they’re thinking and feeling but it just doesn’t pay to dive in there without thinking things through and beginning with being able to imagine themselves all up into whatever they wanted to experience.

Which is a kind of lead-in to the next thing I’ll scribble about – and you’ll know it when you see it…

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Posted by on 7 December 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts and Top Searches: Coincidence?

I dunno… maybe it’s just me, but there seems to be an increase in the interest in blow jobs, from the bi guy forum to my old friend, Top Searches, which still has a question about bro jobs hanging out on my dashboard and my post, “Asking for a Bro-Job” continues to be the most read scribble.  Even my protege, Cityman, said something to me about a surge in the number of guys hitting him up and offering (and asking for) head.

Makes me wonder if there’s something about this time of year that could be responsible.  Cityman opined that maybe it’s the holidays and dudes are just lonelier than, say, back in the summer.  I opined that in much of the country, winter is making itself felt – the weather’s getting colder and nastier in some places and maybe guys aren’t of a mind to be out on the prowl so much when it’s colder than a witch’s tit – so staying and, um, entertaining themselves via some mutual cock sucking is better than running around all over the place and looking to do the same thing – bad enough one has to go out in the cold to go to work and handle other necessary business.


Cityman had asked, rhetorically, what’s up with all the guys wanting to suck cock “all of a sudden” and I reminded him that cock sucking is still like the number one M2M thing to do and as I’ve said here time and time again, it’s high on the list because it doesn’t take a whole lot of time, doesn’t require any special preparation before the fact, can be done almost anywhere… and, oh, yeah, it feels pretty damned good giving and/or receiving.

That and there are plenty of bi guys who’d rather not fuck or be fucked.

When Cityman and I talk blow jobs, it’s rarely about technique; nah, we tend to get into the guts of it (definitely no pun intended), like what’s so appealing about it, whether or not cock sucking “should be” a required skill all bi men should learn – stuff like that.  We debate whether or not technique is all a guy needs or it’s having that desire, that love of participating in some oral satisfaction, that has the most meaning… or a combination of both things.  We get into that whole oral fixation thing and how odd it is that a guy will want to experience this, be justifiably scared shitless to do it – but then gives it a shot and now they kinda get hooked on it.

We discuss the social aspects and once got into an interesting conversation about how guys sucking each other off more often can go a long way to resolving population issues and even how going down on each other could take some of the pressure off of women to do it.

The guys on the forum get all into what size cock they like to suck and some share what it’s like for them to suck a dick, good information for all those guys still sitting on the bench and waiting for their chance to find out what all the hype is about sucking cock.

One of the things Cityman and I talk about often is why there are some guys who just won’t suck a dick; such conversations tend to get a bit involved because there’s no simple answer to the question, which can range from “I tried it and didn’t like it” to guys being very worried about their masculinity since, you know, sucking dick is such a “girly” thing to do.

Like I’ve been saying, if you think women are funny about such things, guys are even funnier and as evidenced by the number of guys who love to suck cock… but would prefer not to have theirs sucked and how this… behavior seems to be prevalent in guys who are bottoms.  One of the reasons behind that that I know about is some guys know that if they get their dick sucked and made to cum, they’re gonna be taken out of the game and now might not be in the mood to do any sucking themselves.  Another is that some guys cum pretty quickly when there’s a dude blowing them and, well, that’s pretty embarrassing so, sure, the best way to avoid that is to tell homey to keep his mouth off the dick, please and thank you.

Some guys have said that having their dick sucked doesn’t turn them on or doesn’t do anything for them and, as such, they’re of a mind that it’s always better to give than receive.  I know what such fellows say about this and I can accept what they have to say… doesn’t mean I really understand this other than for the reasons mentioned in the above paragraph and maybe even how some bottoms are really into being “submissive” and, I guess, in their minds, they’re the ones who do all of the cock sucking and it’s never a question about reciprocation for them.

So… it’s the holiday season, getting cold and stormy in many parts of the country… and guys seem to want to wile away the winter doldrums by getting into some heavy cock sucking.

Coincidence?  I dunno… it is kinda curious, though.


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: I Tried to Resist, But…

…I couldn’t, not when I saw on my Dashboard, “how to know when a guy wants a brojob.”

Still, it’s a legit question and the only thing I can point back to was the many times I’ve seen guys doing everything they could to get the hint across that, um, you know, if we were to, uh, suck each other’s cock, er, ah, I wouldn’t mind and I sure won’t tell anyone that we did this.  Lemme see if I can (once again) dissect this.

Are there any external signs that a guy might want a bro job?  Other than sneaking peeks at his crotch to see if he’s hard or not, you’d have to be knowledgeable in the art of reading body language and being able to listen to how a guy is saying something and not necessarily what he’s saying although that can be a clue as well.  While these things are and can be rather telling, before one puts such a suggestion on the table, one must remember that what you see or hear isn’t always what’s really going on.

Some of trying to figure this out depends on the situation at hand – what are the two guys doing and/or talking about?  See, back in the day, it wasn’t unusual for guys to get together to just hang out and gossip – yes, women aren’t the only ones who do this.  Now it’s a matter of whether or not the conversation migrates to things sexual or not and, at least in my experiences, it wasn’t ever a question of if a conversation would make that turn but when it would.

For me, that’s when things got to be rather funny.  If you’re paying attention to the other guy, again, his body language and a certain change in the pattern of his speech can, at the least, tell you that he’s horny and wants to do something about it.  Some guys fidget – they can’t seem to sit still and I’ve heard some guys say, out of the blue and totally unrelated to the conversation of the moment, “Man, I wouldn’t mind getting my dick sucked right about now!”

What you don’t know is whether he’s actually hinting that the two of you should do this or he’s really thinking about how he can convince a woman to suck his dick.  Likewise, I’ve been in conversations where a guy will, again, out of the blue and totally disconnected from, say, talking about football, “What would you do if some dude asked if he could suck your dick?”

Some guys are just fucking hilarious when trying to drop hints and just as funny are the guys who sense where this conversation is going… but are on the fence about whether they should offer up their own thoughts on whatever funny question was asked.  For me, sheesh, such conversations and these hilarious twists would be… annoying; I’d be talking to a guy, the conversation gets “sexy,” and he’s dropping hints all over the place and as he does so, I’m thinking to myself, “Why don’t you just come out and tell me what you wanna do?  Jeez!”

So when a guy dropped the “I wouldn’t mind getting my dick sucked” thing, I’d just ask them, “What’s on your mind about it?” or sometimes I’d even say, “Yeah, that would work for me, too!” – and then watch them – again, their body language can be quite telling if you know what to look for.

To the question of, “What would you do if…?” I’d often take a moment to think about the guy I’m talking to and what I already know about him before answering in one of two ways:  If a guy wanted to suck my dick, sure, I’d let him do it or, if I’m pretty sure or have a good sense that this answer would, ah, offend him, I’d backpedal and answer with, “I don’t know what I’d do…”  And many times, I’ve learned that what I thought I knew about a guy wasn’t all there was to be learned about him, i.e., he’s usually pretty vocal and against guys doing it to other guys… but, secretly, he’s either done it before or is now looking to take the plunge.

Then, with either response, I’d watch his body language and if he appears to be disappointed or even “encouraged,” well, he could be suggesting that the two of us whip out our dicks and work toward making them very soft again.

Once, a guy was tap-dancing all around the place and it actually got on my nerves enough for me to say to him, “Why don’t you just ask me what you want to ask me and stop dancing around all over the place?”  Sometimes, one can be intuitive enough to sense a change in the mood and pick up on the fact that whatever machinations the other guy is going through really means that if you were to agree, it would be nice for us to suck on each other’s dick until we both cum.

And I won’t tell if you won’t.

You just know this is what he wants to ask and do should you be of a mind to agree – and now it’s just a matter of whether or not he’s gonna be brave enough to just put it out there.

Some guys disguise their, ah, desire for this with roughhousing; if a guy “suddenly” suggests that we should wrestle or otherwise initiates some light roughhousing, well, that could be a rather physical hint that he just might want some more, um, personal body to body contact.  The thing that always struck me as being hilarious was that most of the guys I hung out with knew I had a black belt in judo and they’d still want to wrestle and now for me it was a matter of being observant enough to be able to feel his erection as we tussled.  Or, like one guys did during one roughhouse session, um, he planted his face in my crotch and lightly gnawed on me; on the surface – and if you had been watching this, it looked like he was trying to distract me as I had applied a light arm lock, you know, to “shock” me into releasing the arm lock (not that I was really gonna hurt his arm).

I felt the… nibbles and just said to him, “If that’s what you want to do, ya might want to unzip me first – pretty sure my pants don’t taste all that good…”

His response?  “You’ll have to let go of my arm first…”

On the whole, there’s really no sure, definitive way to know if a guy wants to get into a bro job unless he either does or say something that leaves no doubt in your mind that this is what he really wants to do.  Again, sometimes what he says can be an indication and more so if he’s asking or talking about something that’s unrelated to whatever preceded this change in the conversation.  If a guy seems to be down in the mouth about something – girl problems, some shit going on with his job or even the frustration over not being able to get a job – and a few other things, it’s just kinda strange that when guys get stressed to a certain degree, sex just seems to be the right thing to relieve that stress and, sure, if some intoxicants are involved, well, there’s no telling what his lowered inhibitions are going to reveal.

Sure, if you sense that things are heading in this direction, you could just simply ask him, “Why are we talking about this?” or even “What is it that you really want to do?” while keeping in mind that he might be “offended” and start backpedaling.  Guys talk to each other about sex even if in rather general terms and a general sort of way; doesn’t mean he’s fishing for a bro job… and it could mean that he is and now it’s up to you to figure out what’s really on his mind and short of asking him directly, there’s still no dyed-in-the-wool to know or tell that he’s interested in a bro job unless, of course, he’s bold and daring enough to come right out and ask you – and some guys won’t because, as everyone knows (or should know), we don’t exactly handle rejection very well.

I’ve had guys ask me how they can ask another guy if they can blow them and without getting punched in the face and I’ve honestly told them that you just get up the nerve to ask them and be ready to deal with however the other guy reacts and even if he reacts badly to such an offer.

And, yes:  I’ve had guys ask me how they can ask another guy if they can suck his dick… and I’ve been the guy they wanted to ask and, yep, I’ve been taken by surprise by such a twist and usually because I just learned something about this guy that I didn’t know.

Guys can be direct and right to the point about wanting to do this… or they can drop hints, tap dance, and other rather funny things trying to get up the nerve and to the point where what they want to do, right here and now, is to get some cock sucking going.  I’ve sat and watched guys go through all of this and stop short of actually putting the suggestion on the table… then, the next time I’ve been hanging with them, they happen to mention that, um, you know, the other day?  I really wanted to suck your dick and was hoping you wouldn’t mind sucking mine…

And the only thing I could say in response was, “Why didn’t you just ask me?”

And that’s really the only way to really know if a guy wants a bro job – just ask him if that’s what he wants to do as well as deciding whether or not you, too, want to do this.


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Oops!

I’m sorry to bring this up again, but, the image of that clip I saw on Tumblr a while ago now where the young guy was sucking dick and got surprised by the other guy cumming popped into my head and while I know it’s not really funny… um, it still gives me the giggles to recall the look of utter surprise on his face and his cheeks doing the chipmunk thing.

One of the reasons why some women will skin you alive if you cum in their mouth is because, as I’ve heard countless times, the “perpetrator” swore on every holy item he could mention that if she does this for him, he’s not gonna cum in her mouth… and then he does just that and, yeah, sometimes a guy can be such an asshole because no matter what he said, he intended to do what he swore he wasn’t gonna do.  Going forward, the “victim” might continue to give a guy head but it ain’t gonna be “a whole lot” and she sure as hell isn’t going to tolerate one of those “I didn’t mean for that to happen” excuses… and even if the guy truly didn’t mean to.

I often think there are some… misconceptions at work here.  One of them is our ability to hold back from cutting loose when getting head and as if our control over this is absolute – it isn’t.  Then there are those guys who will say that while they enjoy being sucked, bleh, they’ve never been able to cum that way – or, perhaps, truthfully, they’ve never been allowed to cum that way.  So they assume that if they’ve never cum being sucked by a woman, it’s not gonna happen with a guy… and both guys can wind up getting surprised and often, sooner than anyone could anticipate.

Another is the assumption that the guy being blown will have the presence of mind to give the promised warning and that can be an iffy moment at best because getting shoved off the cliff can hit a guy faster than his brain can realize it’s about to happen – and there’s no time to blurt out, “I’m gonna cum!”

And, um, oops – sorry about that, man…

And, yeah, there are still those guys who are total assholes and will tell a guy that, hey, if you suck my dick, I promise to let you know when I’m gonna cum so you can stop, okay?  Then, moments later, oops!  Now the cad is “apologizing” for something that he, in fact, meant to do.

As I sat here giggling to myself about that video clip that seems to be stuck in my head, a question popped into my head and along the lines of what, if anything, can a guy do to keep from getting surprised?  The first thing is kinda obvious:  If you’re not planning or wanting to get a mouthful of spunk, um, don’t suck cock – and I’m not even gonna say don’t suck it for a long time because, again, a guy’s “control” can be subverted at any time.

If a guy promises to warn you, take it with a grain of salt because, um, he might not be able to give the warning in enough time and, yeah, if he’s telling you in no uncertain terms that he’s not gonna cum in your mouth, um, don’t believe him and keep it firmly in your head that shit always happens when you don’t want it to.

Are there any “warning signs” that a guy is on the verge of cutting loose?  Yeah, there are… if you’re able to pick up on them and you’re paying attention to how he’s reacting to what you’re doing – and some guys just don’t give off any signs that they’re about to cum; one moment you’re happily sucking on him and the next, oops.  Sometimes the “warning signs” are noticeable, like being able to feel a series of tremors running along his cock and being able to feel the guy’s prick swell to some degree and if he hasn’t issued the warning, you have maybe a second or two to get his dick out of your mouth.

If you keep on hand on his cock and, sometimes, one hand lightly on his belly, you might be able to pick up on those things as well as a big change in his breathing.


Of course, the other thing one can do to avoid a mouthful is to tell the guy – and before anything happens – that you’d prefer him not to unload in your mouth and just in case he’s not gonna be able to keep his word to abide by your wishes, put a condom on him.  Not only is it safer but should his, ah, control not be as good as he thinks it is (or as good as you think it should be) if he goes “oops,” it’ll be in the condom and not assaulting your taste buds with a taste you might not be used to or want to deal with.

And that’s if you can handle the taste of latex; even those flavored condoms can leave a worst taste in your mouth than a load of spunk can.  Some make the mistake of using a condom that’s been pre-lubricated; not only does the lubrication keep the condom from drying out in the package, the lubrication can also contain a spermicide – I wonder if it’s still Nonoxol-9? – and the included spermicide can not only taste horrible but can make one’s mouth and tongue go numb.


Let’s see… what else?  If you have doubts about his ability to not cum and you have reason to believe that he’s getting close, stop sucking him and finish him with your hand – oh, and point the “barrel of the gun” away from you unless you’re not gonna mind getting a facial.  Another kind of funny thing is that some guys actually like to watch the other guy bust a nut and tend to hover over the cock they’re stroking with their hand and waiting for the explosion to happen… and with their mouth open – and usually because they’re also trying to catch their breath.  The guy cums and, oops, now you’re tasting some spunk when that wasn’t on your list of things to do.

Lawd… I can’t get that damned video clip out of my head; I think that guy’s look of utter surprised is burned into my memory.

I’ve talked to guys who’ve gotten that unexpected mouthful and they were beyond being pissed about it and usually because there was no warning and while I can sympathize with them, I’ve asked them, “Well, what did you think was gonna happen?”  Some guys admitted to being surprised, like, the guy cut loose way before he thought he might and I’ve found myself shrugging and telling the pissed off guy, “It happens…” which doesn’t make the “offended” guy feel any better but is still an indication that what you think and what might happen truly aren’t the same things.

One of the things that isn’t exactly an “oops” moment is a guy getting surprised by the amount of spunk they find flowing into their mouth… and some guys can really bring the fabled “huge load.”  Instead of “oops,” that’s more like an “oh, shit” moment to find yourself trying to handle more than you expected and, oops, sometimes swallowing out of self-defense or even as an automatic reaction to find your mouth “overloaded” and spitting it out, well, there’s just no time to do that right away.

But, yeah, even that can make a guy giving head get “that look” on his face and give him chipmunk cheeks.  Yeah, I know – it’s not really funny and more so when one gets caught off guard by the other guy’s happy moment – I just happen to have a wicked sense of humor.

Now, ya might be wondering if I’ve ever been surprised like that… and the answer is sure I have and, yup, I’ve even had guys tell me that they’d warn me, that they weren’t gonna cum, and even that they couldn’t cum like that; otherwise, I never would have learned the lessons that are a part of this and the biggest and most important one is that if you suck a guy’s dick – and, sometimes how long you do it isn’t a factor – if you do it in just the right way, he’s gonna cum in your mouth.  How do you know when you’ve done it in just the right way?  Um, he’s gonna cum in your mouth and, yup, it’s a surprise to both guys.

So you learn to expect it to happen and if it doesn’t, okay.  You fix it in your mind that if/when he cums – and you’re not opposed to him cumming in your mouth – it may be a little or it may be a lot.  It might take him a while to cut loose or, ah, embarrassingly, it could literal take a few seconds.  You do your best to identify the warning signs (and if the guy gives off any) and if you think he’s about to unload on you, just stop sucking him.  There are little tricks you can use to, um, delay the inevitable, like hold him at the base of his cock and applying some pressure – but not a whole lot because that shit hurts, right?  If you want to make him cum – but not in your mouth – use your hand a bit more and cut back the amount of time you have him in your mouth.

The thing is that once a guy reaches that point of no return, nothing you’re gonna do is gonna stop him from exploding; the other thing is that the point of no return isn’t as… consistent as one might expect because not only do you not know when the other guy is going to reach that moment, sometimes he doesn’t know, either; like I said, it can either take him quite a bit of time to cum (and more so if he jerked off before you got together) or it can happen seconds after you get started.

And, oops – chipmunk cheeks and that look of total, utter surprise on your face.  I will say that this situation isn’t really that big of a trust issue that some guys make it out to be; if anything, it’s the giver not really understanding how this whole thing can work and that it often doesn’t work the way one might expect it to so, yeah:  If you suck a guy’s cock in just the right way and in the right moment, what do you think is gonna happen?

And, with all seriousness now, if you don’t want to be surprised and be all chipmunk-y, um, don’t suck dick or do it with him safely covered up.


Posted by on 28 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Being in One of Those Moments

I’m sitting and watching “Station 19;” the new captain is bitching out a woman on his team who has applied to be a lieutenant and he had given her some leadership tasks… and tasks that she failed to do and he said something about the way she was thinking…

And your friend and mine – my brain – asked, “Why is it that some folks believe that bullshit that us bi guys don’t think about what we’re doing?”

Oh, okay… we’re really doing this again, brain?

“We sure are… and while you’re at it, we need to make a dumpster run so grab your coat and I’ll rewind the tape and show you what I’m talking about…”

I don’t remember his name or how we even wound up being together; I don’t even recognize where this memory too place – my brain has edited that information out because it’s not germane to the question asked.

We’re both naked and I can tell that he’s nervous – this is only like his third or fourth time doing this and his body language is conflicting because he’s nervous yet his cock is showing no signs of being nervous. Indeed, he’s so nervous I can smell it, a somewhat sour kind of scent that’s not wholly unpleasant. He’s telling me something – I can see his mouth forming words but can’t hear what he’s saying.

“It’s not important what he’s saying,” my brain says, trying to sneakily ease its “finger” off the mute button. “This ain’t about him – it’s about you so pay attention, okay?”

I said something and he smiles nervously before stretching out on the bed and I follow, feeling my thoughts shifting into operating mode but I’m not really thinking about anything outside of wondering what he’s gonna taste and feel like in my mouth.

“Fast forwarding,” my brain says and now I’m well into sucking his dick and most of my senses are working at 110%; his scent has changed – it’s no longer a little sour because he’s gotten over his nervousness. With one hand on his belly, I can tell his body temp is up, as is his heart rate and breathing and, oh, yeah, his cock tastes and feels wonderful in my mouth and I’m trying to decide if I want to prolong making him cum or “kill him quickly…” and then let him live just enough so he can return the favor… or even if wanna be bothered with that… or swallow his jizz and keep going until he’s good and hard again.

That’s for later consideration; for now, he’s gently thrusting into my mouth and even though my brain has muted his moans and curses, I can feel the vibrations in his body and just when I’m about to really get into the zone, my brain says, “You know we’ve got that meeting tomorrow at 9:30, don’t you?”

“Oh, and when you get done with this guy, don’t forget you’re supposed to go get the oil changed.”

“What’s for dinner? Are you cooking or do you wanna order out?”

“He tastes a little salty and I’m reminding you to get your lab work done…”

“What else do we have to do later?”

And this sudden influx of seemingly random thoughts stops me dead in mid-suck, my tongue kinda waving around his cock knob as I ask my brain, “Of all the times to bring this shit up, you had to do it now?”

“Sure; just because you’re having fun blowing this guy doesn’t mean I’m supposed to just shit down… and that remind me – we’re getting low on coffee and creamer.”

I blink and return to the moment and, oops, he’s spilling his seed into my mouth and it does taste as good as I suspected it would… but even as I swallow, I’m back to thinking about those few seconds where my brain decided to do it’s job and think, remind me of stuff, and keeping track of the guy who’s been writhing under my oral assault and did, in fact, record the moments before his back arched and he pushed a little more of himself into my mouth just before that first spurt was fired.

Just as it made note of how long it took for him to cum – just over six minutes; total time I was “distracted” by the other things in my head? Felt like twenty minutes – was really only a few seconds and, as always, one of those things was that damned cricket that lives in my head reminding me that I should have done this, shouldn’t have loved doing it, and I sure as hell shouldn’t be getting situated so he can do what’s he’s doing now.

“Which, by the way, does feel good,” my brain chimes in. “Now, while he’s having fun working to get you off, let’s go over what we have to do for the rest of the week…”

While my brain is forcing me to go over my to do list, The Cricket is pissed beyond being pissed… because this guy is really giving my dick a good working over. The Cricket is protesting mightily, that other part of my mind is droning on and on about what has to be done next month, and that part of me that is always paying attention to everything is letting me know that in about, oh, another few minutes, he’s gonna make you cum – so what do you wanna do after that?

Do you call it quits or do we have time for another round of this?

Let me finish busting my nut and I’ll get back to you…

Lots of white noise blankets out all thought… the the signal is reacquainted and the brain is both rejoicing over my ejaculatory moment, The Cricket is having a stroke and a grand mal seizure, and then”appointment secretary in my head had determined that if he wants to go again and, um his renewed erection seems to indicate that he does, well, we have some time before I gotta go get the oil changed.”

Total time immersed in this memory? About five minutes – the time it took me to get the big trash can, trundle it to the dumpster, empty it, and return home.

And, no – it’s not true that we don’t think and/or are mindless about doing this, that we’re not aware of the implications and the probable consequences… but if you were to ask what I was thinking about as this guy and I sucked each other off twice, my answer just might have been, “Nothing…” not because I wasn’t thinking but because what I was thinking about was just too much to verbalize and most of it didn’t have anything to do with what the two of us was doing that day.

And even as I went through this memory, that damned cricket had something to say – again… and just as I did that day, I ignored it, not because it’s being a mental pain in my ass but because it’s not telling me anything it hasn’t told me many times…

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Posted by on 26 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Eagerness

After my visit to the forum just a few minutes ago, I thought it was a quiet kind of day until I saw a new response to what I think is a favorite recurring post/topic:


I zipped through the previous responses to get to the most recent one and as I scanned everything, wow, it does my heart good to see so many guys not only being quite eager to suck cock but to swallow a guy’s load as well.  Those of you who aren’t into this are thinking, “Dude… ew!” but there’s a bit of a school of thought behind guys who want to do this that also ties into something I was thinking late yesterday evening, both before and after a conversation with Cityman about sucking dick (which I’ll get into in a moment or so).

As I’ve written before, there are entry levels to a guy’s foray in to M2M sex but it seems that the “main entry point” for a lot of guys is cock sucking – but mutual masturbation actually occupies the top spot where ease of doing goes.  Not all bi guys are into anal sex so when they want to have some sexy fun with another guy, they can either do some monkey spanking or cock sucking (and sometimes both).  Indeed, I know it’s just my opinion but cock sucking should be seen as a skill to be acquired and mastered since fucking might not be possible or even desired.

Ah, so many of the guys on the forum do suck cock and many more are waiting for their opportunity to do it but the big topic is what to do if/when the guy cums?  Sure, one of the other hot topics is about acquiring the taste but the guys who aren’t so much “worried” about that are still quite eager to experience what it feels like to have a guy cut loose in their mouth and, interestingly enough, many are working on ways to make their own nut disappear into their bellies, from licking their fingers clean after rubbing one out to trying to get into a position where they can, um, take it as straight to the head as they can.

Now, proper cock sucking etiquette says that swallowing is optional – it’s okay to spit it out and even remove the dick from your mouth before the other guy explodes… but why swallow in the first place?  It’s… “nasty” in a very odd but good way because, you know, guys aren’t supposed to be doing this in the first place while a lot of guys are of a mind that if they’re gonna put forth the effort to entice a guy to cum this way, they want the “reward” for that effort and, um, it’s an efficient way to, ah, get rid of the evidence, as it were.

At deeper levels, there’s something… satisfying about being in that precise moment; you’ve been applying your oral skills to this guy, enjoying the feel of his hardness in your mouth as well as getting a rush from how he’s responding to what you’re doing.  You’re into it and, I dunno, you kinda want him to cum and not so much because as long as he doesn’t, you can keep getting your oral fixation fix as well as driving him bat shit crazy.   For the most part – and more so if anal is off the table – you want him to cum in your mouth; a lot of guys are of the mind that if you’re sucking cock, why do it if you don’t want him to cum?  In another weird way, it just kinda makes sense, not only because it’ll make the other guy feel good but it also make you feel good, gives you a great sense of accomplishment to feel his cock pumping away while entrapped in the warm wetness of your mouth.

Those of you who aren’t into this are probably still thinking, “Ew…!”  But for bi guys who aren’t into getting poked in the butt, there’s nothing more intimate than experiencing this moment and, again, it’s the moment you’ve been working diligently toward.  For a lot of guys, making the other dude spill is one hell of an ego trip because, well, of a bit of a contradiction – he wants you to make him cum… and he’s also trying to hold off from doing it for as long as he can and if he’s pumping away later on, it’s a win/win but he also kinda loses, too, since he was, at one point, trying not to give it up to you.

Those of you who are into this know what I’m talking about; those who aren’t are still probably rolling your eyes so hard it’s making your head hurt… but for guys who are, basically, oral only coming out of the gate, it’s not like there’s a lot of other options, that and sucking dick is one of the biggest hurdles a guy who’s new to this has to get past and, again, as I’ve said so many times before, it looks like a lot of fun and looks kinda easy to do… until you have a dick in your face awaiting your attention.

As mentioned earlier, Cityman and I were talking about this and he kinda asked a rhetorical question along the lines of who knew sucking cock could be so much fun?  See, one of the myths about this is that all guys suck dick (and swallow) when that’s not really the case; there are guys who wouldn’t suck a dick if you stuck a loaded gun to their head and cocked it.  Some guys will do it because it’s expected of them and because it’s an expectation, eh, the less time spent doing it, the better so giving homey a few token sucks to get him good and hard is what the doctor ordered.

It seems, however, that for those guys who aren’t so much into sucking cock, they get to a point where, for some reason, handing out a good blow job just works and I’m thinking that sometimes it’s because they might not feel like laying the pipe to the other guy or, even simpler, poking the other guy isn’t what he wants to do or needs.  I reminded him that there are times when you don’t have the time to do anything more involved than exchanging blow jobs so if that’s the case, why not do your best to enjoy your part of the arrangement?

Some guys take to this like the proverbial duck to water while others have to learn how to like doing it which, again, isn’t as easy as it sounds – you’re still about to do something you’ve been told that guys aren’t supposed to do to and with each other and I’ve even learned that in that moment of truth, the guy about to do it for the first time isn’t really thinking about having a dick in his mouth…

He’s wondering and worried about getting a mouthful of warm spunk and, better, what to do with it.  A few weeks ago (I guess), I wrote a little something about seeing a video of a guy sucking on a dick and that look of total surprise that came across his face as the dick he was sucking blew up in his mouth – the guy’s cheeks puffed out and comically so and I mention this again because one can be quite surprised by this and, sometimes, I have the thought that some guys think that the other guy busting a nut always takes a long time so, as such, they have “time” to think about what, if anything, they’re gonna do should the other guy cut loose.

To this, ah, damn… forget the shit you might see in any kind of porn that has cock sucking in it – keep in mind that those things are edited but in real life, it can take a long time… or not and when you’re not expecting the guy to cum, yeah, you get surprised and like the guy in the video, you wind up swallowing more out of self-defense than a deliberate intent to swallow.  And, yes, every time I think of that video, it’s pretty damned funny thinking about his reaction.

Cityman shares that he finds himself getting more and more into sucking cock and, frankly, I’m not in the least bit surprised; not only do you have to learn how to do it, you also (again) have to learn how to like doing it and then not be afraid of what’s gonna happen if you keep doing it in a way the other guy really likes.  I recall talking to a guy once who was telling me about his first experience and his reaction to having a load pumped into his mouth and, at least to me, it was as if he didn’t expect it to happen – maybe the other guy told him that he’s never been made to cum via oral or something along those lines.

I remember asking him, “Um, what did you think was gonna eventually happen?”  and I shit you not – he replied, “It wasn’t that!”  Maybe he was expecting a warning – which is quite polite, by the way – and he was miffed because he didn’t get that warning?  I’m not sure but what I know is he wasn’t happy about it.  It was all I could do not to laugh when he made a face and griped about having to swallow it and I had to ask him, “Was it really that bad?”

He had to think about it for a few seconds before he admitted that, no, it wasn’t that bad – he just didn’t expect it and even today, I find such a thought both curious… and funny as all get out.

You don’t have to swallow it if you don’t want to – some guys know this and some guys just assume that if you suck a dick, you have to swallow and, indeed, with a lot of guys, swallowing is expected and if one doesn’t swallow, it’s a major deal breaker.  I just think it’s cool that a lot of guys are eager to swallow because, if nothing else, you’re never gonna know whether you like it or not unless – or until – you do.  A lot of guys hear the horror stories told by other guys and they determine that, nah, I don’t think I’d like doing that but not thinking or considering that just because one guy had an unpleasant experience, that doesn’t mean you’re gonna have an unpleasant one… but, yeah, those unpleasant ones do happen; I don’t know anyone who sucks cock who hasn’t had their share of moments when they wished they hadn’t done it but that’s kinda to be expected and I’d say – and say it again and again – that porn makes it look like the coolest and hottest thing to do other than fucking… but they’re never gonna show you those moments when sucking dick and/or swallowing becomes an epic fail – but that’s why they can edit the shit out stuff and only show you the good stuff.

Swallowing is a choice and even those folks who don’t have any qualms about swallowing don’t always swallow.  I’ve said that, in this, it’s not really about what the other guy wants you do to with it – it’s about what you wanna do with it and that includes not letting it into your mouth at all if you don’t want to.

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Posted by on 16 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Why Are You Doing It?

On the heels of “TBT:  Who Is Better?” on of the things that I think play heavily into this is why someone is sucking cock to begin with and, doing a bit of generalization, men and women do it for different reasons and reasons that I’ll do my best to explain.  I’ll get this right up front and say that y’all don’t have to agree with me but I’m just telling you some things that I’ve observed over all this time.

Sassy Sara commented on my last scribble and mentioned that she’s been going to town on her hubby and expecting, at some point, to have his tool inside her but realizes that he’s close to exploding so she keeps going until he does… and this particular thing is one of the reasons why some women are loath to endure finishing off a blow job; they know that if he’s allowed to cum, she’s not gonna get screwed in that moment or later (and when she might not be in the mood) or not at all.

Good reasons not to finish a blow job, right?  Some say this is selfishness, some say it’s a necessity because her needs should always supersede his needs so he shouldn’t ever expect to be finished unless she’s giving him head because that’s all she wants to do.

It’s not totally a case of women not liking to give head but one of a combination of things, like, it’s hard work and the bigger the cock, the harder it is to work; some guys in her past have managed to make sucking cock a rather miserable thing for her to do and when you combine these two particular things, if she’s going down on you, it’s usually because it’s expected of her or, in her mind, merely a prelude to her getting nailed… and let’s not ignore that getting a mouthful of stuff is still very much an acquired taste and one that is always subject to change even with the same guy.  It’s the reason why a guy cannot step to a woman (or his woman) and ask her for a complete blow job without getting his head handed to him in some way.  Well, he can ask… it’s a sure bet he’s not gonna like her response and/or answer.

It’s also something that some women can be in a hurry to get done with and for the reasons I’ve already mentioned.  Let me, at this point, add in another peculiarity that, among men, adds to this situation, namely, how some women demand to be eaten and giving her a few token licks is not what she had in mind; I’ve heard too many men complain that they don’t understand why a woman will be so demanding about being eaten for long periods of time… but if he were to suggest she suck him off, shit tends to hit the fan.

Which is a nice segue into why there are guys who like to suck cock and be sucked by other guys.  The thought here is that another guy is – or should be – willing to do that which women, “apparently” aren’t of a mind to do as well as it is assumed that all guys who into sex with other guys suck dick as a matter of course and by default and unless some fucking is on the list of things to do, finishing things is expected and for many men, required.

Let’s not forget that there are a lot of guys who are into sex with other guys who wouldn’t suck a dick even if you put a gun to their head and cocked the trigger nor should we forget that just like women, men do get subjected to bad cock sucking experiences that will impact and effect their willingness to suck a dick going forward and, yes, including that, “I’m not gonna cum in your mouth – I promise!” thing that many women have experienced.  Then, not all guys who suck cock acquire the taste and guys to find out, just as women have, that sucking dick and getting the guy off isn’t always as easy as one might think it is so for some guys, sucking a dick and working to get the guy off is more of an effort than they want to expend and, sometimes, time is a factor which is also why a lot of guys are game for a blow job session because when compared to what it takes to get dick into ass safely, blow jobs take less time and can be done almost anywhere.

But just like some women, a lot of guys suck cock because they’re expected to and as a prelude of getting poked by the dick they’re sucking – again, like women, guys expecting to be fucked aren’t gonna be of a mind to finishing off the cock in their mouth because they know that when the other guy cums, it’s game over for an unknown period of time. So to the guy doing the sucking, not finishing the job makes sense to him… but to the guy on the receiving end, well, he just experienced a bad blow job because he wasn’t allow to cum that way.

For both men and women, all of this should sound familiar, right?  Cocks get sucked – or pussies get eaten – out of expected obligation and as foreplay for the main event – putting A into B or C.  One pointed difference is that there are guys who aren’t into anal sex at all so their one and only thing to do is to suck cock and since this is the only thing they wanna do with another guy, they’re gonna be pretty gung ho to do the job and finish it… provided the other guy cooperates.  Guys in this frame of mind are… dedicated to making that dick hard and making it soft and no matter how long it takes to do it but it is to note that when time is a factor, some guys can be quite aggressive when working the dick, the thought here being the quicker nuts can be busted, the faster one can get back to whatever they were doing before taking a cock break.

Um, some guys don’t respond well to aggressive cock sucking which can divert attention from the pleasures of being sucked to worrying about any discomfort he’s feeling, like too much teeth being involved, sucking too hard, and even being gripped too hard or having their balls fondled too roughly for their tastes.  Then tack on the expectation factor, like a guy just expects that the guy going down on him knows exactly how to suck his dick and get him off… and unless it’s a guy you’ve been with before, uh, how is a new guy doing it gonna know exactly what it’s gonna take?

You’re beginning to see how this “Who’s better?” thing is starting to play out, aren’t you?  Then one of the most definitive and deciding factors – the notion of what’s a good blow job and what isn’t and a lot of guys are of a mind that if they aren’t made to cum – or allowed to cum – the blow job wasn’t all that and no matter whether it was a girl or a guy performing it.  It cannot be discounted that some guys do not know how to get their dick sucked and are of a mind that face fucking, for instance, is the same as getting a blow job and I tend to disagree with that and, yep, I lay the blame for this directly on porn which has gotten a lot of men thinking and believing that someone sucking their dick really wants to get gagged, have rivers of snot and tears flowing and just having their mouth and throat ravaged.

And while some do think this is their idea of cock sucking fun, that ain’t everyone who sucks cock and, indeed, there are some cock suckers who are of a mind that if something like this isn’t happening, the receiver must not be enjoying what’s being done and guys who do it as a matter of course probably believe that they’re not doing it right if they’re not trying to ram as much cock as they can into someone’s mouth.

If a cock sucker doesn’t like that, well, sure – the receiver is going to almost always label the blow job as bad because it didn’t meet their expectations.  A lot of guys point to technique as being a factor in determining or deciding between good and bad; as I’ve said a lot of times, technique is important… but just because Person A can deep throat the shit out of you but Person B is unable to, that doesn’t necessarily mean that the blow job is a bad one but, yeah, once again, expectations tend to play a very major role in this good/bad and who’s better thing.

But if you suck cock, why are you doing it?  Maybe you don’t think this has something to do with things… and if so, I’d say you’re probably very much mistaken and it is something that most people don’t think of… or really give a shit about.  The reason why someone sucks cock is tied to and/or related to both their ability to do it… and their desire to do it or, as mentioned many times, the difference between an obligatory action, liking it, and loving it and these three things impact cocks suckers and no matter if they’re male or female, that and if a receiver makes the cock sucking experience a nightmare for even the most eager cock sucker, that good, bad, and who’s better thing becomes more of an issue.

I’ve asked guys who suck cock what I think is a simple question:  When you’re sucking dick, who are you doing it for?  Are you sucking that dick because it makes you feel head-swimmingly wonderful… or are you sucking that dick to make its owner happy?  Would it surprise you that a lot of the guys who’ve answered these questions will say that they’re doing it to make the other guy happy?  I’m not saying this is unimportant… but it’s my thought that if you’re not sucking dicks because it makes you happy, could that also play into the good, bad, and who’s better thing as well?

And, before you ask, I’ve been asked the same question(s) and my answer could be seen as a selfish one in that when I’m sucking cock (or even eating pussy) I’m doing it because it makes me feel very damned good to be doing it and, in turn, it makes the recipient a happy critter – unless they tell me otherwise, of course.

I think one of the things that also plays into this is the thought that cock sucking is a submissive act… but not every cock sucker looks at it as a submissive thing to do and, perhaps, depending on what the word “submissive” means to an individual.  Many cock sucking guys do say that the reason why they suck cock is because it makes them feel submissive and they like feeling that way.  I’m not saying this is a good or bad thing but it does factor in to that whole good, bad, or who’s better thing.

It’s really all about why and not so much how that I feel is key to this whole cock sucking thing.  It’s about incompatible expectations and you can read this as the cock sucker having one expectation and the recipient having a totally different one.  Sassy Sara mentioned a factoid that said only something like 13% of men actually cum from a blow job… and even she thinks this isn’t quite right (and neither do I) and there are a lot of reasons that support this… and also plays into good, bad, who’s better from the fact that some cock suckers who are expecting to be fucked will not allow or tolerate the recipient busting a nut to including the fact that some guys actually “cheat” when they’re expecting to be sucked by jerking off before the fact and that’s something that, in most men, will make getting him to cum again take a very long time to achieve… and if it happens at all.

If a cock sucker gets it into their head that the other person isn’t enjoying what’s being done, it will affect things… and even if the giver is really mistaken about that.  Technique, such as it is, will not only vary from one person to the next (and even with the same person) but whatever happens to be going through a giver’s mind in that moment can affect the outcome – and the pun is really intended this time… and if the giver has other expectations or has it in their mind that what they’re doing is way too much work, that, too, will play into any determination where good, bad, and who’s better is concerned.

One other thing that I think plays into this among men are those guys who want their dick sucked – or don’t want it sucked – because they know they’re gonna be enticed to lose their load before they want to and it’ll take them out of the game and put an end to anything else that might have been on the table… unless there’s sufficient time to allow recovery and a continuance of things… and sometimes, there’s no time for that.  As odd as it may seem, a guy who is enticed to cum before he wants to will view this as a bad blow job… because his expectations weren’t met and they didn’t take into consideration why the other guy is sucking his dick in the first place.

Is any of this overthinking things?  I don’t think so and considering how many guys want to not only have their dick sucked but be made to give up the jizz.  Again, between men, if the agreement is to exchange blow jobs, there are some hard-set expectations or, really, just one:  If you suck my dick, you’d better make me cum and if you don’t, you will be tagged as being bad at it and the “balance” between who’s better will tip one way or the other.

Maybe it’s just me but I think that guys should be, at the very least, grateful that someone is willing to suck their dick in the first place and instead of having an expectation of being made to cum, perhaps their focus should be more on how he’s being made to feel while being sucked.  If they can, um, it might help to know if the person sucking their dick even wants them to cum – and sometimes they don’t and it’s not necessarily because busting a nut is a game-ending event or they haven’t acquire the taste for spunk but because sucking on a hard dick is very pleasing and as long as it’s hard – and its owner hasn’t unloaded, the longer the pleasure can last for the giver.

So in many ways, it’s all about why it’s being done and more than a means to an expected end.  I can remember many a conversation with women about why I suck dick and I’ve responded initially by asking them, “Why do you do it?”  They’ve answered, “Because I like doing it” or a similar statement and I’ve replied, “Well, there’s your answer to why I do it… and do you really believe that women are the only ones who not only suck cock but do it because they like/love doing it?”

And I guess that never occurs to some women, huh?  The thing is that guys who suck cock have something in common with women who suck cock and we do, in fact, do it for nearly identical reasons:  Out of obligation or expectations, because we like it, or because we absolutely love doing it and if some seed gets split, so much the better but if not, it was still a fun thing to do even if the recipient feels that not cumming didn’t make it fun for them.  In the case of good, bad, and who’s better, it’s about perspective more than anything else – what the giver’s purpose for sucking the dick is and what the receiver’s expectations are about the outcome of having their dick sucked.

There are reasons… valid reasons why some women aren’t the fans of it that some think they should be and any guy who sucks cock should know – or will eventually learn – why women behave they do about sucking dick, just like they should learn something about this thing we have in common with women and, yes, including how much some of us just love eating pussy and just like how many women love doing that as well.

And, once again, it all begins with why and, sadly, how this is usually ignored or not paid a lot of attention to; there’s the whole expectation thing that very much plays into the good, bad, and who’s better issue and if a giver somehow doesn’t meet a receiver’s expectations, a bad mark is gonna be issues for the man or woman performing the act.

Okay, I need to get to work on smothering some pork chops so I’ll leave y’all to think about this and if you have your own thoughts, well, speak up because one of the other determining factors in this whole frigging discussion is the fact that this is something we just do not ever wanna talk about and regardless to sexuality.

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Posted by on 4 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts


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The flailing scraps of a struggling writer. Original fiction and creative whining, whenever my petulance will allow it.

Mighty Cents Worth

The greatest site in all the land!

Penny's Dirty Thoughts

Penny's blog of sex related writing and photography