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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: What A Night – Three the Hard Way

Yep… still not trusting this thing and, oh, Larry? Yeah, I forgot to do this in Word but I won’t forget it next time.

People want to believe that bisexuals do whatever they do in a mindless fashion… and that crazy sounding thing I wrote last night says that we’re not as mindless as folks think we are: We do think about what we’re doing and why we’re doing it and even in touch with whatever feelings that are coursing through us – and at any given moment before, during, and after the fact. And, yes – that includes being very much aware of the consequences of our actions.

We just don’t pay that much attention to it. I know this because even though I know there’s more shit than I want to admit to going on in my head that, over all this time, I’ve learned to not pay a whole lot of attention to unless a yellow or red flag pops us.

How you’re feeling and what you might be thinking in any given moment can impact the sex you’re having and not always in a good way. How many of us had have sex with someone when our feelings and thoughts suggested that, um, something like cleaning a messy toilet sounds like a better idea?

Take a peek inside your head – the answer is there. Experiencing some performance issues? Might not be a physical reason… could be one that’s inside your head. If you go down on a girl or guy and they aren’t responding, not having an orgasm, etc., did you do anything wrong… or is the reason inside their head… or even yours? We’re quick to blame ourselves when the sex doesn’t go “right” and even quicker to blame the other person when, and I’ll say usually, the real culprit lives inside your – and their – skulls and is likely to just fuck with you because it can.

We all try to blank out or settle our minds before doing the deed… only to find out that, um, that doesn’t work or last very long. I talk a lot about being in the moment and some folks have a hard time with this… because of what’s going on inside their head, from random shit to being acutely focus on stuff they ain’t gonna do because, hmm, it might make them lose control, become very vulnerable, not their idea of fun and a lot of other shit that makes being in the moment – giving yourself over to it fully – a very damned hard thing to do.

Is it really overthinking to think about whatever you might be thinking and feeling at any given moment in this? Y’all might say it is… but I’m just saying that it might not be and more so if you ever get it into your head that you’re not enjoying sex as much as you think/feel you should and, oh, yeah, it’s the other person’s fault. We further and often sabotage our sexual efforts by having a firm set of expectations in mind and there’s a part of our brains that’s paying very close attention to make sure those expectations are being met and/or exceeded… and that serves to distract us from what’s actually being done (or what we’re doing) and, yeah, ya might not really be aware of the fact that you’re doing this… and sometimes you are.

What am I thinking about just before I go down on someone? You have no idea of how much shit I’m thinking about and feeling in that very precise and specific moment and even when I’m shoving it to the back of my mind so that I can be in that moment… because it’s about being in the moment and I’m just the guy who will tell you that whenever you find yourself not being fully in the moment, ask your brain why it’s not letting you do this.

You might be surprised at what you find out about yourself and, perhaps, those you sexually interact with. Why does a guy/gal feel guilty just before oral sex begins – and despite wanting to do it or get it done? It’s all in your head… you’re not supposed to put your mouth on anyone like that or allow someone else to. Feel dirty, nasty, and horribly filthy having anal sex even though you like it? That’s your brain fucking with you.

Did something you swore on a stack of bibles you’d never do? Ask your brain why you did – it knows.

The bottom most thing is that if you don’t or can’t understand yourself, you might have a difficult time understanding why someone else is the way they are when having sex and especially if it goes “badly” or you get surprised by unexpected actions that your brain is directly responsible for.

That guy who blew and finished me? The first thing he said – when he could speak – was, “Why did I do that? I didn’t want to do that!” And I knew why: Something he was either thinking or feeling said to him, “Yeah… do it!”

Or, “Fuck it…” Why? Because, at some point, your brain just gets overloaded with a lot of shit and shit you might not even be aware of. Why did someone do that? Or why didn’t they do something? Why did you change your mind one way or the other?

Ask your brain. The problem here is that a lot of the shit that really goes on doesn’t have any words you can use to explain it so if asked, you wind up saying, “I don’t know!” or simplifying things down to, “It just feels good” or it didn’t.

Yep – really deep shit that – and get this – we don’t wanna think about.

 
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Posted by on 13 September 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: What A Night – Part Deux

Yeah… not trusting the WordPress editor today.

Now, I know a lot of these… changes come from being in the moment aka “the heat of the moment” where whatever is going on inside your head is one huge jumble of stuff that gets pared down to a couple of words: Fuck it!

I’ve uttered those two words to myself… but what made me say them? For me, it’s not enough to know what I might or might not do; that’s easier than understanding why I might or might not do a thing and finding out calls for taking a close look at what, if anything, was going on in my head. Like most people – and if you had asked me way back when – I would have told you I wasn’t thinking about anything… until I realized that I was thinking about a whole lot of shit and, oh, my God… the shit I’d find running around in my head was unbelievable!

Yep… I’d be focused and paying attention to the task at hand… but it was the stuff running around in the background that floored me like, why would I be thinking about taking my car to the car wash just as I started having sex with someone? Or what was on my schedule at work for the next day or the whole week? For the task at hand, what was I gonna do? How was I gonna do it? Do I even really want to do this?

Still sound insane? Yeah, it does but methinks one of the keys about having sex with someone is understanding yourself in these things and, for me, that means digging down to the root of things – all that shit that goes on in my head that, at a high level, I probably shouldn’t be thinking about while understanding that my brain never really shuts down, well, unless I’m on the operating table and anesthetized – but that’s different.

Over the years, I’ve had people ask me, “What were you thinking about?” and, again, I’d say I wasn’t thinking about anything (other than what we were doing) or I’d say, “I dunno – I didn’t know I was thinking about anything!” Only to find out that I was… and, yeah, maybe all that shit running around in my head could have affected what I was doing in some way both in good and not so good ways.

Hmm. If I’m like this, could others be like this and, as such, this unwanted and unstoppable thought processes could also impact how they’re having sex? Yeah… I can “hear” y’all laughing your asses off at me and I’m good with that… except I know that there’s a good chance you know exactly what I’m talking about because you’ve had your mind sometimes screwing shit up for you when you’re naked and getting busy, too.

See, I’m a mentor to one guy and share my knowledge of M2M things with other men; they have questions, I usually have an answer. A guy will ask about wanting to suck a dick and whether or not it’s weird for him to want to suck one as badly as he feels – and why does he want to do this in the first place? I’ve learned that you cannot and should not give someone a half-assed answer, oh, like, “Don’t worry about it – just do it and you’ll be okay!” because they might not be okay, that and a lot of guys – and gals – wind up screwing the pooch in some very bad ways because they don’t know what they don’t know.

I just happen to be the guy who does know… because I think and study the shit that most people don’t give a lot of thought about. Why didn’t he cum even though you did everything you could think of to get him to do that? For that matter, why didn’t she cum? Did he/she not like what I was doing? Do I suck at whatever? A gazillion questions like this come up every day and a lot of them lead to a lot of self-loathing, eroding one’s self-confidence, etc., and they don’t know why.

I do – most of the time – and because I think about that shit and I think about it because it’s important.

 
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Posted by on 13 September 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: What A Night!

Sometimes, my brain just runs off the rails and as evidenced by my late night TBT about pre-cock sucking (and pussy eating) thoughts… and even as I wrote it, I was thinking, “You sound like a crazy person – you know that, don’t you?”

Yeah, I knew it… and I still did it and had fun scribbling it. While it’s all right and proper for me to have my thoughts kinda/sorta organized before scribbling, eh, sometimes I don’t but that’s cool – this blog is about what’s in my head and there’s no telling what’s gonna pop outta there and, um, what it’s gonna sound like when it does.

I had been thinking about sex and across the spectrum – from that general high level to the more “personal” aspects; I was thinking about the “Then and Now” post as well as the one WordPress made go away that was about being bi and married – including just being married – and how it’s the worst situation to be in once you find that you need something your partner can’t – or won’t – let you have.

I was thinking about the guys on the forum and all the sex-related things they come up with and my mind got locked on oral sex and, at that point, went flying off the rails over that moment before mouth meets genitals but, as I went on to explain, it was more of an exercise in self-awareness because in any of this, for me, it’s not enough to know what people do but why they do them – what are they thinking and/or feeling? Are they even aware of what’s going on with themselves?

Overthinking shit? Probably… but it’s all about understanding yourself and those you might become engaged with. While I was “losing my mind” writing last night’s scribble, I thought about all the many times I’ve had a guy go down on me when, before the fact, he said that was something he didn’t think he could do. Not that big of a deal for me – either you can or you can’t and I’m not gonna get bent out of shape if you can’t.

Next thing I know, the guy is going down on me and like his life depended on it and, yeah, I put a note in my mind to ask him later what he was thinking about or feeling that changed his mind. Hell, I’ve often wondered what made me change my mind when I’d do something I normally wouldn’t do, didn’t want to do, didn’t feel like it… and there I am, doing the “unthinkable” just the same.

Ditto with a woman who had never gone down on a guy. She made it clear that she never did it, wasn’t ever gonna do it… then she did it and, sure, I wanted to know why. Likewise with women who aren’t fans of guys going down on them or they’ve never been eaten; don’t like it, of a mind that someone’s mouth only belongs on those lips that are on your face, or having that done is just plain nasty… and, okay… but why “all of a sudden” did they say, “Eat me!”

I dunno… but I wanted to find out.

 
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Posted by on 13 September 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Tonight’s Bisexual Thoughts: Before You Suck…

…that dick – and those of you who don’t suck dick, well, you can leave if you feel like this grosses you out but if you’re a cock sucker – straight, bi, or gay – stay with me on this one – but how are you feeling and what are you thinking in that moment before mouth meets cock?

Oh, you might have noticed I typed “Tonight’s” instead of “Today’s” – because, um, it’s nighttime but the day isn’t over with yet. Why? I dunno – felt appropriate.

Do you feel the anticipation and are excited by it? For the guys who suck cock and reading this, do ya feel a little… girly? Thinking this is a waste of time? Not really gonna do anything for you? Doing it by rote, obligation, or because it’s expected?

Are you already thinking about how this is going to end? Feeling nervous, maybe a little anxious? Perhaps hear that voice in your head giving you a raft of shit for what you’re about to do?

Are you thinking, “Oh, yeah… this is gonna be good!” or are you really thinking, “Damn, doing this again? Might as well get it over with… shit.”

What’s that you say? You’re not thinking about anything? Whoa… are you dead? Or is it that you’re having a shit-load of thoughts and feelings that you’re just not paying attention to?

Are you thinking, “I hope I do this right for him…” – or her if eating pussy is your thing (and I can’t leave out my bisexual sisters, right?) – or are you thinking/feeling that, ha, they’d better be glad you’re about to do this for them? Would you rather be doing something else, oh, like cleaning the cat’s litter box? Running errands? Being eaten alive by sand fleas sounds like a better idea?

What’s going on inside your head in that brief space of time before your mouth closes around the cock before you or, yeah, that coochie that’s awaiting your oral attention? Do you even think about what you’re thinking and feeling?

Just on autopilot? You’ve done this so many times there’s nothing to think about? Or is every time as exciting as the first time? Scared? Worried about something? Confident you can suck that dick (or eat that pussy) or is your confidence feeling a little iffy?

Y’all know me by now – I wouldn’t be asking such ridiculous questions without having a reason to ask… because I wanna know; I want to learn something that will add – and maybe even explain or confirm some of the shit I’m thinking about and feeling in that itty-bitty space of time before I start giving head.

Because I’m thinking about a whole lot of shit when, honestly, I don’t want to think about. Oh, I can be quite and terribly focused but my mind never really shuts down and, yes, I’m talking about a seriously tiny space of time.

Once you start giving head, well, that’s different, just like deciding that you’re gonna give head is different. I’m talking about that moment of truth, that little time slice just before you go down on them.

Or do you, I’m some fashion, think or feel, “Fuck it… I’m down here so…”?

Yeah, I know – this shit sounds cray-cray, right? You’re probably thinking, “Damn, dude, – what’s there to think about? Either you’re gonna do it or you ain’t!”

But it’s an exercise in self-awareness – do you really know what’s going on with you in that very small piece of time? How are you feeling? What are you thinking? See, it’s easy to go over this after the fact, you know, if you even bother to think about such things but in that precise moment?

What’s going on with you?

 
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Posted by on 13 September 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Okay…

Those of you who’ve been reading and following me know that when I was ten, my father, in one of his drunken rants, told me that no matter what, I’d better not ever put my mouth on a girl’s pussy.  He didn’t say why I shouldn’t do that and made it sound like the worst thing that could ever be done short of getting a girl pregnant.

Ten minutes later, I found out it was one of the best things about having sex and in the following fifty years, I have  only refused to eat a pussy once and only because it was sick with infection.

The word was that you could have the biggest, fattest dick and could fuck for a long time before you nutted… but if you couldn’t and didn’t eat pussy, you weren’t shit and were considered to less that shit if you did eat at the Y… but only spent a few measly seconds doing it.  Those of you who’ve been reading and following know that back in high school, I got tagged with the “unkind” nickname of “Taster’s Choice,” thanks to the sexual zodiac patch I proudly wore on my Wrangler jacket, the sign of Libra and depicting a woman sitting on a man’s face.  My peers laughed and said many terrible things to me about that patch… but while they were having fun at my expense, I was getting the pussy they weren’t even close to getting because I not only ate the dreaded pussy but I’d camp out between a girl’s legs until she couldn’t take it anymore or I couldn’t do it any longer.

At ten, I was determined to find out all I could about this eating pussy thing and took every opportunity to learn from the best teachers:  Women.  And I took those hard lessons to heart and with much – and maybe even too much – seriousness, up to and including studying the anatomy and chemistry of pussy.  It was well known that Black men didn’t eat pussy, that no self-respecting man would ever put his mouth on something that bled on a regular basis, and that many a Black man would publicly and categorically deny even thinking about munching on some bearded clam.  I wasn’t one of those guys and, as you might imagine (or even know for a fact) that Black men do, indeed, eat pussy – but, ah, let’s keep that in the down low because I don’t want anyone else to know that I’ve been fronting to save face.

Once word spread that I was a pussy-eating fool, shit, girls who wouldn’t give me the time of day to save my life were suddenly interested in finding out for themselves if what they’d been hearing was true… and those who weren’t inclined to believe what I would say wanted to find out in the only way it can be definitely and finally proven:  Come and eat my pussy and let’s see if you’re nothing all hype and no substance and if you are as good at it, I might even let you fuck me.

Okay, I have no problem with that so, thank you, open your legs, and find something to hang onto and I hope you’re not in a hurry because I’m gonna be a while before I get finished.  What’s that you say?  No one has ever made you cum like that before?  Okay, that’s good to know… so let’s see if that’s as impossible as you think it is.

How much do I love to eat pussy? So much that there are times when all I want to do is to eat it even though it is a very challenging thing to do – and, sometimes, damaging thing to do; I’ve had bloody noses, black eyes, scratched to varying degrees of bloodletting; I’ve been choked until I’ve almost passed out, have come as close to drowning as a person can come without being in a body of water. I’ve pulled and strained muscles, have even eaten pussy with stitches in my chin, and despite toothaches.

Why?  Because eating pussy is just way too much fun not to enjoy – does one need another reason other than that?

Word has always been that if you wanted to keep your woman, you’d better eat that pussy and as if your very life depended on it because if you didn’t, she will find someone else who’ll do it like this for her.  Women have made it clear, that you’d better lick it before you can stick it and they aren’t joking and telling you that if you don’t lick it good, you won’t get to stick it and it’s no idle threat on their part.

Oh, and if you don’t lick it, everyone will find out that you don’t have what it takes to show a pussy a good time with you mouth, lips, and tongue.  Maybe it’s just me but if she’s not looking at you as if you either ran her over with a tank or as if you tried to kill her, you didn’t do it enough.

It’s not a chore – it’s a damned intimate pleasure and one that I am so glad my father was wrong about…

 
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Posted by on 30 July 2016 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Hairy Situations

As a stone cold lover of eating pussy, one learns to do this under many situations, like sometimes having to search through thick that he’s of pubic hair to get at that sweet clit and other juicy parts.

These days, a lot of women want their pubes to be hairless and for whatever works for them in this; it’s their prerogative to keep the coochie shorn and as smooth as the day they were born.

I, of course, learned to eat pussy before women decided that being bald done there was fashionable or necessary… although when I ate my first pussy, um, she was just beginning to get those first strands of hair.  But as I continued to munch my way through every girl willing to be eaten, I’d find myself navigating all kinds of hair, from straight to curly to downright nappy – that one made the pussy look as if the girl had thousands of BBs glued to her mound.

Ya just learned how to get through the hair, the scents it would hold onto, the way it either tickled your face… or scoured the shit out it and more so when she’s fucking and grinding her now-sloppy pussy against my mouth and face.  Oh, yeah… you also learn to be rather adept at getting the hair out of your teeth, a rather bothersome chore but, yeah, it was fucking worth it.

Then, somewhere along the line, women started getting rid of their bushes.  It didn’t really matter to me – it made getting at the beardless clam easier but, um, I couldn’t help but notice that some of the bald pussies I was now enjoying weren’t what I’d call visually pleasing; it seems that when they pulled their carpet up, uh, maybe they should have left it there, if ya know what I mean… but that pussy would still get eaten just the same until I’d have her looking for something to beat me with just to get me to stop eating her.

Hair or no hair meant nothing to me.  Now, some women open to trim it down, making it nice and neat and, sometimes, in interesting designs, like the now-infamous landing strip; one woman I was eating had her bush – or what was left of it – shaped like a heart while another was brazen to have her stuff crafted into the words, “Eat me.”

I did wonder about the skill level of the person trimmed that bush… but it was still a good-to-eat pussy just the same.

When I got into swinging, well, man… almost everyone had that “No pubic hair” preference; if your shit wasn’t baby-butt smooth, don’t bother to apply.  Some were fine with closely trimmed bushes but they were in the minority; I wasn’t beyond fucking with these “carpet cleaners” y asking them why this preference was, often, non-negotiable and they’d site cleanliness issues… which would get me asking if they were just assuming that a given woman wouldn’t wash her pussy more than shed wash the hair on her head.

They said the hair made the pussy stink and I guessed that they just didn’t know that pussy hair doesn’t make a pussy smelly – it just holds onto the dew that her skin – which has a lot of scent glands there – produces and that they didn’t know that a woman’s coochie produces that scent to attract men to it.

You get rid of the hair and that deliciousness has nothing to cling to and, really, that’s why “pussy deodorant” was created – Right Guard for the pudenda.  Still, despite this, ah, fastidiousness or even fussiness, as far as I was concerned,my hat pussy was still gonna get eaten until one of us passed out… and I was determined not to be the first one.

I still very much love hairy  pussies and while I’ve seen some incredible jungles between the legs of some women, ya mon, having to hack my way through that jungle to find the treasure was, again, well worth the effort. I will admit that despite my love of pussy hair, I do get a kick out of shaving them bald; it takes a very steady hand and a delicate touch around the tender parts and, of course, after that’s been done, I have to not only inspect my work but I gotta use my tongue to search for any hair that might have escaped cleanup.

Here’s a tip for the ladies and it doesn’t matter if they shave or not.  When you wash, bathe, or shower, finish things by giving your clit and labia a nice coating of baby oil to keep it all nice and supple.

 
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Posted by on 9 November 2015 in Life, Living and Loving

 

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