Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 08 May 24 @ 1302

The “greatest gift” given to me when I became bisexual was… oral sex.

First, sucking cock or, that first time, barely managing to use my tongue the way he was trying to tell me and learning the “up, down, and all around” motion as well; I didn’t as much suck his dick as he kinda fucked my mouth but I liked the feel of the head of his dick in my mouth, all soft and spongy but kinda hard at the same time.

Those warm splashes of his cum that were filling my mouth up so much that I swallowed most of it out of a sense of self-preservation changed my life forever. The very next day, I had to tell my friends about it, found out that a couple of them already knew about it and the five of us went to a hideout to suck on each other’s pricks because it felt good to the one doing it and definitely the one getting it done. A whole lot of years later, I would wonder and marvel at how easily sucking dick came to be and my fellows which only lent itself to my theory that men giving each other blowjobs was just as normal as anything else.

My only complaint was that my friends weren’t shooting the stuff – but there were guys who were shooting it and I was happy to suck on their much bigger pricks until I heard them groan and then felt those warm splashes in my mouth – and swallowing as fast as I could to gulp down the salty-sweetness of their stuff. Yeah, sometimes, one of those guys would want to squirt his stuff between my butt cheeks, which felt weird but good and would leave my butt sticky and squishy.

But if a guy wanted his dick sucked, I was the guy to find, not that it was my intention to be that go-to kind of guy but Adult Me would recognize that from the very first moment I had a dick in my mouth, I was hooked on it and I couldn’t get enough of sucking dick, with or without the baby-making stuff. Almost a week after that first life-changing experience, I ejaculated for the first time and now I’m shooting the baby-making stuff, too.

My friends didn’t believe me but, um, they sure found out when they sucked my dick and made me shoot – and while some of them were mad that I was shooting the stuff (and they weren’t) but it made me quite popular among other guys and a few of the Hot in the Ass Girls. Ah, I remember an older guy – a teenager – sucking my dick and I told him that I was gonna shoot and he either didn’t hear me or he ignored me but I definitely got his attention when I shot my stuff into his mouth and he was surprised e

Years in the future, I would be talking to a doctor about this and he was kinda surprised that I was nine when I first ejaculated but I had also told him that a couple of weeks before that happened, I’d been hit by a car and had gotten stitches in my head and he suggested that hitting my head when the car hit me might have triggered my entry into puberty and, well, that was about the best explanation I’d ever heard of. My other male friends didn’t ejaculate until they were teens – well, most of them didn’t – but while they were waiting to be able to shoot the stuff, I was having the time of my life sucking dicks and getting mouthfuls of the stuff – aka jizz – from those who could give it and in quantity.

Then I learned about eating pussy. If swallowing a man’s sperm was/is an acquired taste, so is putting your mouth on a girl’s pussy – but I had to know why my father told me to never put my mouth on a girl’s pussy. Adult Me knows why you shouldn’t because it can get you into some… interesting trouble but absent that? I thought that sucking dick was the best thing ever and it got replaced the day I ate my first pussy.

Which made me popular again with girls. They might not have been of a mind to let me stick it in and do it to them and squirt my jizz all up in them but once they learned that I didn’t mind licking the kitty (and the girl I first ate told all of her friends about it), if I wasn’t sucking dick, I was eating pussy and constantly learning how to master the skills that could make guys shoot their stuff and make girls try to push me from between their legs.

An older woman told and taught me that if they’re not looking at me like I tried to kill them, I didn’t do it right – and I’d better keep at it until I did it right. I might not have had the biggest dick, and I might not have been able to fuck for a very long time without cumming but I could suck dick and eat pussy like a fiend and guys liked having their dick sucked and girls really liked having their pussies eaten and the long you could do it, the more they liked it.

Being teased about it in high school and that was okay because my comeback was, “That’s how I’m getting the pussy you ain’t getting…” because girls were making it clear: You had to lick it before you could stick it – and they did not mean giving the kitty a few licks.

They meant you’d better pack lunch and dinner because you’re going to be there for a long time.

I was learning that giving someone head could be a lot of work simply because it wasn’t always easy to get them to cum, say, in less that twenty minutes. The challenge for me was to go down on them and stay down on them until they came, or they made me stop or, sometimes, they couldn’t cum even if their life depended on it and not all of my head-giving experiences went swimmingly well and lessons in how you can’t please everyone – but you can sure as hell have fun trying to.

Being around men and women who either didn’t give head or they didn’t like getting it (and learning some important stuff as to why they didn’t) and my personal thought and feeling that they not only didn’t know what they were missing, they were the ones who was crazy and not me. Girls would be like, “Do you eat at the Y, and do you eat for a long time?” and guys would be like, “Do you swallow?” and, why, yes – I can do both! And, yes, I learned the joy of being able to suck cock and eat pussy in threesomes and other group sex activities because, um, it just made sense to have sex like that and everyone was fair game and when someone would make me cum and I had to recharge, I could keep myself occupied waiting to recharge by sucking dicks and eating pussies.

Being lucky enough to have sucked multiple dicks in one setting as well as eating multiple pussies and after being disbelieved, dared, and challenged to eat five girls until they all had The Big O… and I did not fail to please them, which was good because I got to eat a lot of pussy thanks to word-of-mouth advertising and “good” reviews.

The fun of having girls I didn’t know rolling up on me and asking, “Is it true that you eat pussy?” and, um, yeah, it’s true – why are you ask- oh, that’s why you’re asking. Being invited to prove that I did and it was a challenge that I couldn’t refuse to take on – and learning some of the reasons why you should never put your mouth on a girl’s pussy – and learning from those who got VD from both guys and gals. So, yeah, Dad, you were right about that but, at the same time, you were about as wrong as it gets and, um, ahem, I won’t even mention being awakened in the middle of the night and hearing Mom yelling at you to eat her pussy and don’t stop. That “do as I say, not as I do” stuff was bullshit…

Even more fun when they would make it clear that all they wanted was to be eaten and I’d better not even dream about fucking them but, um, by the time I got into my pussy-eating groove, they were telling me to fuck them; one girl, when asked why she changed her mind, said, “It was the only way I could think of to get you to stop eating me and making me cum!”

I had peers who thought I was the weirdo because I sucked dick and ate pussy and, at first, I hated being picked on about it until I realized that I might be weird because I loved to give head, but I was getting laid… and way more than they were. Learning not to brag or make promises other than I’m going to do the best I can and know how to because it was all I could do, and I hated it when I failed to please someone orally and understanding that if you don’t fail, you never learn how to succeed.

Being able to turn guys on to the joys of cocksucking and showing them that girls weren’t the only ones who could suck dick – and you didn’t have to be gay to suck dick. Learning that it wasn’t always easy to convince a girl/woman to let me eat that thang but it wasn’t always that hard to convince a guy that, um, look; if you let me suck your dick, you won’t regret it, okay?

That great sense of accomplishment to be able to get someone off with my mouth and, yeah, being told that I’m crazy or that I suck cock better than women and other such things that I learned just to take in stride and to not let it go to my head because (1) there is always someone who’s going to be better at it than I am and (2) I don’t always get it right. Although I would take a bit of pride to be told that I’m almost as good as a woman when it comes to eating pussy and I’ve seen women do it and, yeah, I’m not even in their league but, again, I can only do the best I know how to do.

Adult Me would be thinking about Younger Me and had “finally realized” that at the ripe old age of ten – and learning how to lick and suck on a girl’s pussy – was the “final piece” of the puzzle that was the basics of having sex. Again, I might not have had the biggest and fattest dick, and I might not have been able to fuck “all night long” but I was a cocksucking, pussy-eating fiend of the highest order and even growing into adulthood didn’t change this about me but adults, yeah, adults were funny about it, and I’d learn more about there being some people you should never give head to.

And learning to never let anyone try to steal your joy. Learning that just because the last time didn’t go all that well didn’t mean that it would always not go well – and even with the same person. Sucked a guy’s dick one day and utterly failed to get him off with my mouth and having to endure him pounding my ass unmercifully and unpleasantly until he did cum but the next day? Got him off with my mouth in about four minutes… and he was pissed.

Learning about the refractionary period of sex and how badly it could affect men and women and, yeah, I didn’t understand why I’d be ready to have sex repeatedly but then, I’d bust a nut and… all those plans to fuck and suck all day long was the last fucking thing I wanted to do… but I’d had to learn how to go back down on a pussy I just came in because she’s telling me that she hasn’t cum yet and knowing that failing to make a woman cum, well, it doesn’t get any worse than that.

Or sucking dicks with a guy and he makes me cum first and… yuck, I’d rather go work at the city dump on the hottest day imaginable but he’s still hard and hasn’t cum so my work is not done… and I had do it, had to finish it because I did not want it said that I was afraid to get a pussy that was oozing my spunk or that I cut and ran after busting a nut and left the other guy hanging. Both reputation and pride wouldn’t let me do what other guys were doing to me (and to others) and not always to my benefit at times, but you really do learn how to take the good with the bad and if it was bad, look to see if there was something – anything – I found to be enjoyable… and sometimes it wasn’t easy to.

In relationship mode, eating that pussy wasn’t a chore; it was still very much a joy for me to go down on my wife every day and sometimes several times a day or sometimes, I didn’t want to fuck her – I just wanted to eat her, get her squirting all over the place, and go back to whatever I was doing. Knowing that she’d recommend me to some of her girlfriends because unlike their husband/boyfriend, I would eat that pussy until one of us quit – and I wasn’t about to quit and no matter how beaten up I’d get while eating them, including almost drowning eating a woman I didn’t know was a squirter and she was sitting on my face and, well, take it from there.

Don’t get me wrong – I’d go through some shit sucking dick that I wasn’t fond of but eating pussy would often prove to be a hazard to my health and general well-being from having teeth loosened to being smothered and almost choked into unconsciousness by women who were doing what I wanted them to do: Use my mouth and tongue to get off!

The highest praise gotten from a woman? Being told that I was dangerous and that my tongue was lethal. Being told by guys that I suck cock better than the women they knew… or the one they lived with. My problem was that… I didn’t give head to make the other person happy, you know, as a main reason for why I gave head. I learned that if I’m having fun giving someone head and they’re liking what I’m doing, it’s a win/win for both of us – but I’ve never been, in today’s terms, a submissive cocksucker/muff diver.

Giving head… turns me on like nothing else can; I love the way it tastes, smells, and feels and once I learned how to be in the moment, shit, it just got better. Please don’t get me wrong here: I love being inside someone’s body and that level of intimacy, to be as close to someone as humanly possible, is so special and intimate… but so is giving them head and feeling the rush of taking a guy’s dick right down to the root or having a woman pressing my face against her wetness and like she’s trying to push my head in there is, wow, damn, does it get any better than that?

And then I learned that I’m orally fixated. The short version is that I like having things in my mouth and sucking on them. It explained much and I wasn’t all that concerned about it and, if anything, I reveled in having someone’s cock or pussy in my mouth and just going for what I know and doing the things I’ve spent learning when it comes to giving head.

Do you know what I mean? Do you know how it feels? Knowing the difference between merely liking to give head and loving to do it?

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 31 March 24 @ 0925 Hours

And, speaking of swallowing, a flash memory of a moment sucking a guy’s dick and… he’s talking to me or he’s talking to himself – I’m not sure of what he’s doing as he chants about sucking his big dick and how he’s going to shoot his hot jizz and, yeah, suck my big dick…

And his dick isn’t that big and is, to my estimation, a bit below the established average but he’s got a big cock knob and I had to keep him from trying to shove it down my throat – I could feel it trying to get lodged in my throat and that’s not my idea of fun… but neither is trying not to laugh while trying to suck cock.

I’d heard guys say all kinds of things while I was sucking their dick so you’d think that (1) I’d be used to it or (2) I wouldn’t pay any attention to it and like that one time I was sucking a guy, took him all the way down and… he blurted out that he was in love with me and just before he popped his cock. But this guy is doing a whole running dialog or monologue, and I still don’t know if he’s trying to talk dirty to me or he’s talking to himself and pushing his own buttons – and if he’s trying to talk dirty to me, it’s not working and I’m still trying not to laugh and it’s impossible not to hear him since he’s not exactly whispering these ‘sweet nothings’ to me, himself, or the room at large.

“Are you going to make me cum?” I hear him ask – and now I know he’s talking to me and I’m a little miffed because he’s expecting an answer and I don’t want to stop what I’m doing to answer him so I look up, make eye contact with him, nod my head and take him as deep as that big knob is going to allow me to and go back to what I’m doing… until he asks me why I’m going to make him cum.

“Because I want you to; because you want to; because this is what you do when you blow a guy,” I say, really miffed because I had to stop what I was doing to answer his question and I know he wanted an answer because he kept… tapping me on my head to get my attention and he almost got it in a way he wasn’t going to like but, okay, be nice and the sooner you answer him, the sooner you can get back to making him cum.

“Oh, that makes sense,” he says – and goes back to… talking about suck his huge cock and it feels so good and who’s a bad and dirty boy and… is he talking to me or to himself? I don’t know and I’m now at the point where I don’t really care; I want his cum and I’m going to get it from him by hook or by crook and by any means necessary… because I’m not doing this because I don’t have anything better to do. I wet a finger and push it right into his ass until it can’t go in him any more.

“Oh! Oh!” he cries out and this was the ticket; his cock immediately swells in my mouth and he’s blasting cum like crazy – I can feel it in my mouth as his prick throbs and spasms and I can feel it through my finger that’s buried in his butt, too, and the muscles there clamping down hard enough to make my finger hurt. He’s babbling incoherently as his dick continues to pump… yeah, his warm jizz into my mouth so I can swallow it.

“It is good? Is it good?”

I hear him asking this and I don’t know if he’s asking me if I think his cum tastes good – and I think it’s okay but nothing to write home about – but, no, apparently, he’s asking himself if it’s good and he’s answering himself by repeating, “Yeah, it’s damned good!” over and over and I want to laugh so bad it isn’t funny but, at the moment, I’m not of a mind to let go of his prick because he hasn’t exactly gone totally soft in my mouth and, for me, that’s a “sign” for me to keep sucking him so that he will eventually go soft…

But he suddenly pulls away from me; I look up at him and he’s got that look on his face that suggests that I just tried to murder him and I smile inwardly to know that I owned him but the extra icing on the cake was him asking me, “What was I talking about while you were blowing me?”

What… you don’t know? I allow that, yes, he was talking; I also allow that I wasn’t sure if he was talking to me or to himself and I tell a partial fib: I was too busy sucking him to really pay attention to what, if anything, he was saying; I do not want to tell him that he had me on the edge of uncontrollable laughter with all the stuff he was saying… to me or himself.

And why, oh, why do guys like this wind up on my cocksucking radar? Oh, I remember the guy I was sucking and as I did him, he’s… praying for forgiveness. He started the moment I closed my mouth around him and, for a moment, I thought I was hearing things when I heard him say, “Father, hear my prayer…”

And I can’t forget all the guys I’ve sucked who’ve said, “Yeah, daddy, suck my dick!” and I wasn’t sure if they were talking to me – and calling me daddy – or, um, okay, another guy with daddy issues or is he just babbling to himself?

And why are these guys trying to carry a conversation with me when my mouth is full of their dick and I’m unable – and quite unwilling – to answer; really, if you just wanted to talk, we could have done that without getting our dicks out. And I still believe that you haven’t heard a damned thing until you hear a guy praying to God for forgiveness as he’s thrusting into your mouth and flooding it with cum.

You just haven’t. Okay, back to the other guy. He’s blowing me and… talking around my dick in his mouth and, once again, I don’t know if he’s talking to me or if he’s talking to himself and getting psyched up to blow me; I can barely hear what he’s saying but I can feel his mouth moving and vibrating in a way that tells me that, uh-huh, he’s talking and I’m distracted and thinking that being able to have a conversation with a dick in your mouth is… impressive.

He stops sucking me to ask me if he’s doing it right and, up until that moment, he was doing it very right and I feel my eyes roll all by themselves; I want to grab him by the hair and shove my dick into his mouth and out of the back of his neck but I tell him that he is doing it right and, um, suck my big dick. That seemed to be the encouragement he needed because he… went berserk on my dick and while occasionally saying – to me or to himself – that, yeah, he’s sucking that big cock; he’s got a hand under my ass and trying to use that one hand to shove me into his mouth – while using his other hand to keep me from going deep into his mouth… so he can talk about sucking my big cock and how good it is and because I can see him, I can see the looks on his face and… I want to laugh and I can’t seem to help it – but I don’t do it because, duh, it would be very bad form to start laughing while you’re getting your dick sucked.

He finally stops talking and gets back to his berserker rage on my dick; one hand is fondling my balls and he’s got two fingers in my ass and I’m on the edge of oblivion as I stare into the abyss – and he kicks my ass into it so I can get a better look at the abyss – and so it can look back at me as I fall into its murky depths. I’m cumming so hard that it hurts, the pulses unusually strong and having two fingers in my ass isn’t helping (but it really is).

I’m spent. Worn out from what it took for me to suck him off and then having my ass kicked when he sucked me and me wondering about some stuff when he again asks if he was talking and, if so, what was he talking about?

I could have told him since it wasn’t like I was going to forget any of this. I chose not to answer him… with words; I just pushed him back onto his back and went to sucking his dick again and hearing him ask, “What are you doing?”

God… you just gotta love moments like this. So much better than sucking a guy and he’s calling me all kinds of bitches and whores and trying to convince me that his dick is God’s gift to everyone and trying to be all macho… and whatever the fuck that means. I get him off again and he talked the whole time and I just tuned him out and worked on getting all of his dick down and despite the size of his knob and, well, let’s say that I made better progress the second time but I failed to conquer the challenge his knob presented… but the failure was easy to accept as I heard him calling for his mother to help him when he started to cum…

And like she was going to save him. I almost laugh to think that, yeah, maybe she would barge in to save her baby boy from having his prick ravaged for a second time but that’s not likely to happen… as far as I know. Nuts busted for a second time and we’re in the shower together and in preparation of going our separate ways. We’re… talking about this and that and he says to me that he remembers what he was talking about the first time I blew him and that, no, he wasn’t talking to me – he was talking to himself because he couldn’t believe that a guy wanted to suck his dick and he was… carried away by the moment.

I just nod as I reach around to wash my back; there’s not a lot I want to say about this because I know if I do, I’m going to start laughing and he’s going to ask why I’m laughing and… I don’t want to ruin this moment for either of us by answering his question. He knows he was doing it and he’s “properly embarrassed” by his lust-fueled utterings. I was… amused by them; sucking him off was, if nothing else, entertaining and I shouldn’t be bothered by him talking to me, asking questions, and wanting me to answer them and, really, I’ve heard “worse” coming out of a guy’s mouth when I have his prick in my mouth and doing my best to focus on getting him to pop his cork…

Without having to worry about laughing; or wondering about how odd it is to be doing something that’s unholy and immoral and praying to God for His forgiveness while the unholy and immoral act is in progress – and then screaming out for Jesus to help him when homey unloaded a hot of goo into my mouth. Or being surprised at anything that might come out of a guy’s mouth when I’m sucking his dick and, yeah, how hard it is to swallow when it’s being made difficult to do.

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 17 March 24

I hope everyone has been having a great Saint Patrick’s Day!

I was just catching up on the new forum and now I know what’s been bugging me for the last week or so: The number of guys on the site who firmly believe that they need a woman’s permission to suck cock. I’ve known, for the longest time, of guys who would only engage with another man if a woman was in the mix; try to get them to throw down one-on-one and without a woman present and watch the high level of pushback you could get from him.

It is the dream of every bi guy to have a woman accept their bisexuality and especially if the guy in question is married; the sad truth is that a lot of women aren’t of a mind to give their approval to do something even they believe men shouldn’t do – and, of course, in the face of the fact that men do it. I just got finished reading a response to a comment about sucking cock for the first time and the member is moaning and whining about not having a woman who would allow him to suck cock – and who would suck cock with him, and the light went on over my head and I said to myself, “That’s what the fuck has been bothering the shit out of me!”

He’s not the only guy who has echoed such sentiments and conditions under which they would gladly give into their urge and need to suck dick and, yes, usually in a threesome situation and, well, do we not know how a lot of women feel about that one? What gets me – and it might be my being an old motherfucker from way back in the day – is that if you want to suck cock, if you’re not going to give yourself permission to do it, why would you ask someone else for permission – and a woman who you have no idea is going to go along with it or who might flay you alive for even bringing up such a thing?

Yes, yes, bi and married and you want to dive into the pool and have your every dream and fantasy come true to find out what it’s like to have sex with a guy, while many men find that it’s better to beg forgiveness than to ask permission – and if they get busted or outed – it’s better to ask permission even though you could potentially be opening up an even bigger can of worms.

For some of these guys, sucking dick is a fantasy and some of them probably cream their underwear dreaming about being in a threesome with a woman and she “forces” him to suck the other guy’s cock – and like the other guy is just naturally going to go along with that; for some, cocksucking is a game to be played at which, honestly, pisses me off because I take my bisexuality very damned seriously and it’s never been a game to me (and those who are very much like me). But single guys talking about how much they want to suck a guy off… if only they could find a woman who’d tell them to do it…

This is real life, dudes – this ain’t porn. I get that it can be a fantasy for some guys or, yeah, wouldn’t it be nice if we were with this hot babe and she made us go down on each other? Not that it doesn’t happen, mind you, but that requires finding the right woman who has the rightest mindset about men, sex, and, well, shit, everything – and I do believe that the majority of those women are already off the market so good luck finding one. You could be married to such a woman but to find out, that requires you to put on some very big boy pants so you can gird your loins – so you can have a conversation with her about your great desire to suck cock – and, preferably, without asking her to be all up in the middle of this unless, um, she’s had the fantasy of making you suck some guy’s cock…

And I begin to digress a bit and I apologize for that. So many threads that are along the lines of, “If a woman asked you to suck cock, would you?” and the amazing number of guys who say that, yeah, if she asked, they would – and now they’re off and running about how they’re not attracted to men, how much they love women, and then how this particular fantasy would play out but, nah, if a woman isn’t going to ask, they’re not sucking cock… even though they know they want to.

I had a “bad moment” to think, “Man, these dudes are a bunch of pussies…” and I rarely think or speak ill of my bisexual brothers but on both forums I get to see my brothers talk about how fearful they are to hook up with a guy and how they’d like for Amazon to deliver them a ready-made FWB and how morbidly risk-adverse they are with all their stranger danger… but if a woman asked them to suck a guy’s dick, they’d do it.

Is it me or is there something not quite right here? My protege was kinda involved with a guy a few years ago who only talked about engaging with my protege if there was a woman present and he had asked me how a guy could call himself bisexual if the only way they’d have sex with a guy is when a woman was present and I allowed that guys I knew who were like that used the woman’s presence to deny that he was anything but heterosexual and, yeah, getting them to come on over and give up the dick without a woman being around just wasn’t ever going to happen… but they’d talk a good game about what could happen if they were to hook up – but it would be better if my protege could provide some pussy (and insisted on this condition).

“I would tell those dudes that if they couldn’t meet with me so we could suck each other off without trying to find a woman who’d want to be with us like that, then don’t even waste my time; I don’t need to have a woman around to suck dick and I don’t really have the time or the patience for guys who do,” I told my protege because just in my opinion alone, a “real” bisexual man has already given himself permission to suck cock and is going to be willing to do it without having to use a woman for an excuse – except for her not giving him permission to actively go out and suck cock with his male friends and acquaintances and, really, not many people are going to blame her for not giving such permission… which is why so many bi guys do cheat on their lady because they either know she’ll never give him permission or he’s like 98.9% sure that she won’t.

Guys who really want to suck cock always find a way to do it, come hell or high water, with or without a wife’s or girlfriend’s permission and pray that she never finds out but, ahem, little do they know that the little woman manages to find out anyway or just because she doesn’t say anything doesn’t mean she doesn’t know anything. True, some women are… okay with their homey getting some dick as long as he’s taking care of home; one woman told me, “If he’s out there sucking dick and dudes are sucking him, that’s one less thing I have to do!”

But that’s not all women and, yeah, I can see how the fantasy plays out for guys wanting to suck dick… but are too afraid to give themselves permission to suck cock. Still, you can see the sense in the whole permission thing if you’re a guy in a relationship with a hankering for sucking dick… but kinda goes over my head with single dudes who don’t have to answer to a wife or a girlfriend. You say that you’ve always wanted to blow a guy… but you’re too afraid to find a guy (and all that other stranger danger shit being bandied about these days) but, aha, if a hot babe asked, you’d be all over that dick like a bad habit?

Or the single guy who said that he could never see himself sucking a dude’s cock because he finds men unattractive and just plain nasty… but he’d go down on a shemale with a nice body and cock without thinking twice about it and, yeah, I got that look on my face because, okay, all the gender stuff aside, she has a dick… so what’s the real difference and more so when I’ve had sex with men who had nice, soft bodies and really nice cocks, oh, that’s right, just like my former boyfriend and, yes, he was quite feminine, too. The member talked about being with a shemale as being the best of both worlds and, I’m sorry, but he is so wrong about that – and I told him he was wrong because unless I’ve really missed something, shemales… don’t have a vagina and, no, boi pussies don’t count.

This isn’t a knock against shemales; they are who and what they are destined to be and if they like having a feminized body but not of a mind to part with their cock and balls, I’m good with that but when you get right down to it, she has a dick… and a lot of guys do, too. Another member chimed in on this one and said that he would rather spend his time chasing guys to suck their cock – and stand a better chance of doing so – than to chase shemales and not even getting close to getting “lucky” because, um, I’m thinking that just like some guy, you’d have to convince a shemale that it’s in her best interest to have sex with you.

If you want to suck cock – and I do mean that you really want to – you first have to give yourself permission to do so because if you’re waiting to get it from someone else, guess what you’re not going to be doing? Then you find a way to suck some cocks and in the safest way you can manage and without being afraid to engage with those guys who just might look at you and think that getting their dick in your mouth would be a lot of fun because unless you seriously get lucky, such a willing guy isn’t going to fall out of the sky and into your lap… or your mouth. Unless you get seriously lucky, your best friend isn’t going to suddenly confess to you that he’s always wanted to suck dick with you so if you’re waiting for that to happen, good luck. If you’re waiting to get that very special woman who (a) wants to have threesomes with other dudes and (b) is of a mind to take charge of your ass and make you suck a man’s cock for her pleasure, I hope you’re not holding your breath if you think such a woman is “easy” to find.

I’ve talked to some guys about cocksucking and they tend to forget that I wasn’t a teenager or an adult when I got tossed into having sex with guys so, for me, sucking dudes off is second nature to me and I long since learned that I don’t need anyone’s permission to suck cock other than my own and throughout my life, I’ve had permission and I’ve had to beg forgiveness, too, but when I want to suck cock, that’s what I want to do and just like I told my first poly wife, “When I want to suck dick, baby, you don’t have one…”

But, first, you give yourself permission to do it. Okay, guys are… guys. Some are better than others but the one thing we all have in common is… we have a dick. I’ve talked to guys who wanted to suck dick but couldn’t quite get their head around the fact that, um, you need another guy for this one and have said to them, “Don’t think about the guy attached to the dick – think about the dick and the act of sucking it; he’s either going to like it or he isn’t but as long as you keep thinking about him and not what you’re trying to do to him, you’re going to have problems sucking dick.”

I do understand how incredibly difficult it is to put another guy’s prick into your mouth and for the first time ever; it goes against everything you believe and everything that you’ve been taught and it feels so goddamned wrong but, at the same time, you know you have to do it and that you will not be right until you do and I have watched guys being in this moment and it is so stressful for them… but the guys who really want to suck cock – and have given themselves the green light to do so – will gird their loins and take the dick into their mouth… and go for what they know and no matter how things turn out in the end.

If you think that first time is going to be all nice and happily ever after and like so many fantasies tend to be, well, I hate to tell you but they don’t always turn out that way because, oh, I dunno, such guys who have this fantasy fail to take into consideration – or they don’t know to – that when guys get their dicks hard, they can become quite unpredictable and the experience you think is going to be all that and then some can easily wind up being the worst nightmare and biggest mistake you’ll ever have and make for the rest of your life.

I am not joking when I say that sucking cock is serious business – but the kind of serious business you can have loads of fun with once you give yourself permission to suck cock… and you don’t need someone else to make you do it or need someone else to validate you in this.

Yeah, I know I’m riffing, but this is something that, obviously, I have always been very damned passionate about and I try not to get riled up when I see guys… being pussies about wanting to suck cock or their improbable fantasies that aren’t anywhere near the reality I’ve seen, learned, and have known about all of my life… but sometimes I do and this is one of those times.

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 03 February 24 @ 1035 Hours

My protege has been sending me a stream of clips featuring men sucking dick… and Black men in particular. Some of those brothas, whew, I wouldn’t let them anywhere near my dick because I’d like for it to stay attached to my body but to say that some of those men really get after the dick, well, it’s an understatement.

Every time he sends me something like this, I’m automatically reminded of the lie that all Blacks are homophobic and I’m looking at the proof but, then again, I’ve always known the truth and particularly the truth that says you don’t have to be gay to be a cocksucker.

You just gotta want to do it. While it’s easy to see this as a sexuality thing when it’s men doing it, it can also very easily be seen as a sex thing; I only knew of two guys who didn’t like having their dick sucked and I’ve seen way too many times that when a guy finds that getting sucked off by another guy is “da shit,” yeah, it’s not really about being a particular sexuality but it is about, um, do you like having your dick sucked and your balls emptied?

The clips, at least for me, tend to ruin the whole thing when the participants start mugging for the camera and, sometimes, ridiculously so; just like professional porn, this “amateur porn” is about the money shot and I groan inwardly every time my protege sends me a clip of guys wasting cum. Sure, swallowing it isn’t really mandatory and I admit to being a bit of a cocksucking snob and, well, waste not, want not. If it’s me doing the sucking, I didn’t put in all that work just to watch it flying through the air and now there’s a mess to clean up…

He often sends me clips of white guys doing the glory hole thing, which is laughable when you see the shoddy “glory hole” set that gets hastily thrown together but the thing I noticed with these clips was that the white guy doing the sucking didn’t let the cum get away from him and that’s more the “reality” that I’m familiar with and, well, I was never a fan of the money shot to begin with.

In either case, it’s good to see men who may or may not be gay going to town on some dude’s dick and bringing him to glory… if the clip goes that far. He had sent a clip that, admittedly, had me as hard as a rock as I watched this guy working over a monster-sized dick like it was only a couple of inches in length and girth. In my head, I was like, “Holy shit…” and I even turn the sound on and in time to hear the guy being so fiercely sucked begging for his life and he sounded pitiful, and I laughed to myself and thought, “Yeah… I’ll bet you didn’t know it was gonna be like this, did you?”

The guy giving the blowjob stepped up his game and in a familiar way that told me he was done playing around with the dick and it was time to make homey cum and just when it looked like the poor guy was going to do a Mount Saint Helens into the guy’s mouth, the clip… stopped and I saw “Watch Again.” What a fucking letdown! I sent a message back to my protege that asks, “Where’s the rest of it?”

Most of the clips he sends are… okay if you can get past the participants trying to act and/or giving head in positions that I’m almost sure no one in their right mind would even bother with such acrobatics… except the guys on the screen, of course. Or skinnin’ and grinnin’ and as if to say, “Don’t you wish this was you?” and my thought of, “If it was me, neither of us would be paying attention to the camera…” but, then again, that’s me and not the two, uh, gentlemen in the clip. My protege will, at times, send me clips where the guy being sucked snatches his dick away and… slaps the cocksucker in the face with it, something my protege knows pisses me off to no end so, yeah, he’s not beyond fucking with me and pushing my negative buttons and it’s all good because I do it to him all of the time.

Or, worse, he’ll send me a clip of two guys kissing and it’s so overly exaggerated that I really want to throw up and that’s yet another clip that won’t get watched to the end – and I let him know that the clip lost me when they started kissing – yuck – and even more so when he sends clips of his favorite kinds of guys in the older/younger and older/older genres as well as those big, bearish guys who are in serious need of some manscaping – just saying.

The clips he sends me tells me a lot about the kind of men he’s interested in and whatever sex those guys are having; sometimes, I’ll watch one and will ask him, “What got your attention on this one?” because, honestly, the clip is as interesting as watching paint dry – and, sometimes, he doesn’t have much of an answer, which also tells me something about him, all of which works toward my being able to understand him as a person as well as a bisexual male.

He’ll send me a clip of a BBC being sucked by a Black guy and ask me if I’d suck the guy and I give him the same answer every time: Sure, I would, as long as he wasn’t my idea of an asshole. My protege isn’t a size queen but he has a “thing” about BBCs that I find interesting; it’s not like he’s afraid of them but, yeah, it sure seems that way but scary in a very fascinating way for him; to me, it’s just another BBC and one of the untold many of them that I’ve seen and have sucked in my life.

Ho hum. I’ll turn the question back on him and ask if he’d suck that BBC and some of his responses are… interesting and especially those where he hesitates before answering and then his answer is kind of wishy-washy and it “reminds” me of someone who is afraid of a BBC even though, again, I know that he isn’t – but some of the BBCs he likes showing me are enough to give me pause so I can only imagine him having an “oh, shit” moment seeing an extraordinary BBC.

Still and again, it’s heartwarming to see so many men willing to suck the soul out of another man and knowing that sexuality may or may not play a role in this; it harkens back to the many moments when I’ve told someone that I suck dick and… I don’t look like the type and eventually figuring out that “the type” is gay and, well, I’m not and would you mind telling me what the type looks like? And watching them squirm and get all weird trying not to answer the question.

At the end of any day, it’s just sex and an act that anyone could perform… if they wanted to. Some guys on the forums crack me up when they make it clear that they’re not gay but they want to know what it’s like to suck cock and be sucked and, well, fellas, you don’t have to be gay – you just have to want to find out for yourself what it’s like and just like every one of us who does know what it’s like.

Seriously, what are you waiting for? Even on the new forum, cocksucking gets more “airtime” than anal sex does and, methinks, thanks to the high number of submissive bottoms on the site and men who, by their own admissions, live to suck cock. Some have reason to question their sexuality but, again, while we have tied cocksucking to gay dudes, obviously, they aren’t the only men who have a thing for polishing another guy’s dome, if you know what I mean (wink, wink, slurp, slurp).

It’s such a good thing to know and to see. Men taking the dick to the head and working it over until the other guy gives up his cum and in toe-curling fashion. In most cases with the clips my protege sends, you can’t tell by looking at the men if they’re bi, straight or gay – you just see one guy working over another guy’s hard prick… and sneaking a peek at the camera.

I’d rather be doing it than watching someone else doing it…

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 01 January 24

Oddly, I started my first day of 2024 thinking about the night my new boyfriend and I sucked each other off and after we’d both professed our love for each other. He also came to mind because when it comes to guys sucking my dick, wow, he’s still #1 on the male side of cocksucking.

I remember the pregnant pause moment after we said “I love you” to each other and something had to happen and it took me a moment to realize that he was waiting for me to do something so I gently pushed him onto his back and busied myself stripping his jeans and underwear off of him to reveal a beautifully hard dick jutting out from a thick thatch of red hair. I wasted no time taking him into my mouth and taking him right down to his pubic bone and I just let my feelings guide me as I sucked him and…. was he crying?

He was! I thought that I was hurting him and/or I was being too aggressive but he assured me that his tears were tears of joy and I went back to sucking him until, a minute later, his prick swelled in my mouth and followed by three or four large spurts of cum and it tasted so damned good and I didn’t sit up until I was sure I’d gotten every drop out of him.

I’m looking at him and I don’t know how I feel about seeing him crying but I asked him if he was okay and he said that if he wasn’t okay before, he was now and I let him push me onto my back and even helped him to get me out of my pants and underwear.

“I am going to make you so happy,” I heard him say and the funny thing was that I didn’t know if he was talking to me… or my dick. He went down on me, taking me deep and as I’d done to him but I could feel his whole body vibrating with… nervous energy? I wasn’t sure but the way he sucked me… was something else. It was like he was in a hurry to get me to cum and not in a hurry at all,

He almost made me cum just sucking on my balls and no one had ever sucked them like he did, let alone spend as much time as he did sucking on them before going back to licking and sucking my dick from head to root. I’m watching him doing me; his face is so red that it’s making his freckles really stand out and… he’s still crying and I’m trying not to see it as the negative it appears to be but I’m now at the point of no return and I let him know that I’m going to cum.

He doesn’t nod or try to speak with his mouth full of my dick but he does reach under my ass with his hands and starts shoving me into his mouth; I get the hint and fuck into his mouth until I… died the little death. My release hit me so hard that my asshole was hurting; my body was jerking and twitching like I was having a grand mal seizure and I felt like he was using my dick as a straw to suck all of my cum out of me.

I’d had guys blow me many times… but not like that and I’d never felt so spent after cumming in a guy’s mouth before… except, um, he wasn’t done with me. Instead of sitting up and getting his act together, he kept right on sucking me and begin very careful to avoid the head of my dick and I’m… not sure if I want him to stop or not but he made the point moot by draping his body over mine and as if we were going to 69. I did drag him into position so I could suck his cock… but he’s doing a number on mine and I’m calling on anyone I can think of to save me from this guy.

He got me hard again in record time and he’s a cocksucking machine and one that rarely came up for air and, at one point, he took me deep and then tried to stuff my balls into his mouth as well! Again, he’s not in a hurry but he’s not taking his time and I can feel the pressure building up inside me again and pick up my pace sucking him. He cums and it’s not as much as the first time but it still tastes good and… I got hit by a truck. Or a jet airliner. Maybe both. And he’s fucking with me now by taking his time drinking down my cum and I’m wondering if I was cutting him a break… or he was cutting me one.

What I did know was that I’d just gotten the best blowjob I’d ever gotten from a guy. We’re both sitting up and I’m wiping the tears from his face before leaning over and kissing him, which shocked him… and me as well. Our tongues are mingling and I can taste myself on his lips and in his mouth and I’m shocked because I don’t like kissing guys but I can’t stop kissing him and next thing I know, he’s all wrapped around me as the kiss gets deeper and more passionate.

I feel him reach down between us for my dick and another shock: I’m hard and “powerless” to stop him from moving me fully on top of him, his legs parting and lifting, and him putting the head of my dick against his bung and before he grabs two hands full of my ass and… shove me right into him – no lube or anything! I gasp and he’s crying again and I’m not believing this is happening as I start to fuck into him, only to hear him say, “I’m not going to break, baby – give it to me good and hard!”

I give it to him good and hard. We’re both looking down at my dick plunging in and out of him and he is so pale – and thank to his Irish heritage – that it makes the color contrast between our bodies stand out even more. I’m fucking him like he owes me money; he’s crying and I almost stop to ask him if I’m hurting him but I don’t; instead, I position myself so I can fuck him and give him a handjob and if I was surprised that I was hard for a third time, I was just as surprised that he was hard again and for a third time and… it didn’t take long before he kinda/sorta came but I don’t think either of us really cared as I got to the end of the cliff and got kicked over the edge.

I’m not kidding when I say that fucking him in the ass was better than some pussies I’d fucked. More kissing, he’s still crying and getting ready to make me cry but he says that he has to pee so we get untangled and hit the bathroom. I had thought that I’d gotten his best blowjob… and I was wrong. It seemed that the more he sucked me, the better he got at doing it and I had to get used to him double-sucking me and tearfully telling me how good my cock felt in his mouth and how good my cum tasted.

It’s 2024… and I still miss him…

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 30 December 23

A forum member asks what he has to do to get over the moral wrongness of cocksucking and asked the membership how they were able to get past this rather fucked up feeling. I chimed in on the conversation and started out with saying that almost every last one of us guys who have sucked cock has learned to get past/ignore/disregard the guilt over doing it and, indeed, some of us became cocksuckers because it’s a taboo thing to do – the immorality of it makes sucking cock even more exciting and thrilling to do.

Me and my young cocksucking self used my intelligence to get past any feelings of wrongness. It didn’t make sense to me to feel guilty over something that I wanted to do and it all went back to The Question: Why does something everyone says is so bad feel so good?

Because it’s supposed to. I wasn’t even a teenager when I figure that out; I wasn’t even an adult when I realized that religion wanted us to keep making babies so of course anything that didn’t lend itself to that goal was deemed a sin, taboo, immoral or however you care to phrase it – which didn’t do jack shit to the fact that there were goo-gobs of men and women out there having sex and in ways that conception was going to be impossible and especially this one: If you suck cock and swallow cum, no babies are being born and, yeah, when I was old enough to understand the whole sperm and egg thing (but still wasn’t a teenager yet), every time I swallowed some guys cum, I thought about all the babies that weren’t going to be conceived.

I had wanted to know why it was okay for girls to suck cock but wrong for boys to – and learned that in certain religions, sucking cock is a sin and deemed to be a method of contraception, which isn’t allowed. Onan’s sin wasn’t because he spilt his seed upon the ground; it was that he did want to do what tribal law mandated, i.e., take his dead brother’s wife and fill her with child. He screwed her but before he came, he pulled out and, yes, spilt his seed upon the ground and he got killed for not knocking her up and disobeying tribal law and law that was, let’s say, allegedly, handed down by God Himself so Onan was killed for disobeying God.

Not that masturbation is a sin because he didn’t masturbate. But we’re good at taking religious stuff and making it fit our own personal view and I’d grow into adulthood and challenge those who believed that male cocksuckers should die and go to hell by asking them, “If this is so wrong and a sin against God and nature, why are there so many men out here sucking dick?”

And watching them have fits parroting Leviticus… and like I don’t know what it says. They take it on faith that the bible is right; I no longer did because, um, hmm, sucking dick is fun and, besides, if I’m going to spend eternity burning in hell, I’ll be there and in good company. Yeah, saying that kinda mocks the taboo but once I learned why it’s a taboo, well, okay, I guess it makes some sense but we – humans – don’t have sex just to make babies: We do it because it feels fucking amazing to have sex and we will shame the shit out of anyone who really likes having sex, oh, like us greedy bisexuals who wants to have sex with men and women, for example.

The forum member wanted to be told that it’s okay for him to suck cock if he wants to and, yes, imagine me rolling my eyes so, okay, I told him to go ye forth and suck cock and revel in it because all of us guys who suck cock are doing just that and, really, if all of us are wrong, we’re just gonna be wrong. As I continued to respond to his posting, I’m wondering… what the fuck is wrong with people that they don’t understand that same-sex oral sex… is still sex? The reality steps on my toes to remind me that I do know why they don’t understand it and that’s because we keep teaching and preaching that anything that even remotely resembles homosexuality is a moral sin, taboo, forbidden, prohibited and you’d better not even think about doing that shit or you’re gonna die and go to hell because God said so.

And me having the unmitigated gall to question that “because God said so” stuff and, as I’ve mentioned so many times before, paying the price for it and, one day, teenaged me is sitting in class – I think it was social studies – and I’m not paying attention to what the teacher is talking about because I’m pondering the fact that all of the homosexuals in the world couldn’t possibly be wrong – and that thought didn’t include guys like me or anyone who went both ways. The law of averages says that one homosexual can be wrong… but all of them can’t be outside of morality and social norms saying that they’re wrong.

Hmm… one of these things can’t be right. What gets me is that there are guys like the forum member who asked a question like this that makes me wonder why and how they haven’t figured it out when I did when I was a child – and even at a very basic level? Is it immoral and taboo for men to suck each other’s dicks? Yes. Has this stopped men from doing it? Oh, hell, no! Does it make a guy who sucks cock a rebel of sorts? I used to think so and… I liked being a rebel and, um, it felt and tasted pretty good, too.

And if you’re an adult and I have to tell you that it’s really okay if you want to be a cocksucker, hmm, really – what the fuck, dude? If you’re an adult, you can legally consent to sex – and cocksucking is sex even if there are those who say that it isn’t – then, go ye forth and giveth head to some lucky guy – and have fun doing it. Sure, there are laws across the land that makes fellatio illegal but, um, yeah, it’s only illegal if you get caught so don’t fucking get caught by the cops – duh. And, yeah, the law means that it’s illegal for anyone, male or female, to perform fellatio and in some states, it’s even illegal for married couples, too.

Why? Sucking down a load of cum ain’t making babies… but it sure feels good to do it and to have it done, huh? Oh, hell, yeah, it does! It’s sex and sex is good for you and, well, which thing are you going to believe? What the Old Testament has to say about it or the real-deal fact of life that says there have been, there are, and there will always be men who find out that sucking cock… is fucking good, that if nothing else, it’s sex and one of many ways a guy can bust his nuts wide open and, no – you don’t even have to be gay to suck cock and enjoy having a guy enticing you to cum.

Most guys figure out which thing makes the most sense… and it’s not what Leviticus says. It’s not rocket science to be able to figure out that religion preys upon our fears to make us – and keep us – in compliance with biblical law and makes a lot of people forget that, in the New Testament, most of biblical law was… set aside but those who have a problem with homosexuality conveniently overlook this part but that’s fine because what they choose to believe… has changed nothing. Homosexuality in men and women continues to thrive amongst us and bisexuality is right up there and doing extremely well throughout the lands because if having sex is normal, natural, and healthy for us to do, why do we exclude homosexual sex and, yeah, sometimes, masturbation?

We know why… and does it make sense? Every time I have asked myself that question, I keep coming up with the same answer: No, it doesn’t make sense and even without my bias chiming in on the subject because, intelligently, it doesn’t make sense… except to control our sexual behaviors and, well, um, fuck, how’s that really been working?

I finished my response to the forum member and came here to write about it and… how sad it is that we keep reinventing the wheel throughout every generation because religion doesn’t want us knowing about the true nature of being human and having sex… yet, in every generation, an untold number of people do find out and sometimes, it’s not a sexuality thing but it is a sex thing and giving a guy a blowjob is a sex thing even if the person giving it is also male – but not homosexual since, um, I’ve handed out many a blowjob and I’m not gay.

And, yeah, um, look, all I want to do is suck your dick and get you off and, hopefully, you’ll be willing and able to do the same for me; I don’t want to date or court you and I’m really not trying to be in a relationship with you, not that I’ve never been in a relationship with a guy because I have – no, it’s because I know that I don’t have to be your boyfriend to want to have sex with you: I just gotta find something likeable about you to want to have sex with you and, besides, giving you a blowjob or two isn’t that big of a deal since I happen to know that guys will blow each other… just because they’re bored silly and they don’t have anything better to do.k

People have said that all of this is just my opinion and, yeah, I’ve begged to differ because it’s not just my opinion: It’s what I’ve learned and the truth has always been out there for anyone to see… if they want to see it and our morality, obviously, would prefer us not to see it. That and I have no reason to lie to anyone about this and I’m not going to. Yep, I’m biased in favor of male bisexuality like you probably wouldn’t believe but I had to learn how to be objective and to not let my bias influence what I was seeing and doing so that I could get to the root of this and I got there and… if I’m sucking a guy’s dick, it’s just how humans can have sex… if they ain’t afraid to.

Our social norms would prefer you to be very afraid. You suck a guy’s cock – and you’re a guy – and you’re going to catch every STD known to man and including HIV I and II unless you’re in a relationship with him… and what sense does that really make? Oh, I know what they say about the stats surrounding male bisexuality and the rise in STD infections and some of the data are actually true… and the rest is made up by folks with overactive imaginations and as someone who had to learn how to be an expert in statistical analysis, um, I know how to make the data say anything I want it to say and I can easily bias the STD data to say that if you’re male and bisexual, you’re more likely to get an STD than a heterosexual men is… and, oh, like it’s impossible for a straight man to get an STD.

But you still don’t have to believe me. Doesn’t really matter because I suck cock and I love doing it and as I will always say: The only thing better than sucking dick is eating pussy… and I’ve been sucking dick longer than I’ve been eating pussy… by a few months, give or take a day or two. Why? Because it feels good to suck cock and it’s quite the rush to make the guy cum and to swallow his cum… and, yeah, because it’s taboo and immoral, but that makes it even more exciting, and I’ve always liked being a bit of a rebel. And the reason why my fellow forum member doesn’t seem to know this is that our social norms don’t want him to know that, um, if you want to suck cock, you can and you don’t need anyone’s permission. Well, maybe your girlfriend or wife’s permission but that’s a seriously different kettle of horses of a different color.

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 21 November 23 @ 0713

I was just thinking that between the ages of 35 and 45, I must’ve been engaging in oral sex with guys no less than three times a week… but not because I was on some kind of mission to do so; I had the good or bad luck to come across men of a similar age and many of whom cited having a mid-life crisis to explain why they “picked” this moment in their lives to become a cocksucker.

No matter where I lived in that ten-year span, there was always at least one neighbor who was friendly enough that we weren’t “officially” suck buddies but if one of us brought it up, okay, we can do that and it’s no big deal. Being able to now go online and “solicit” dick was still a bit in its infancy but a guy would have to prove himself to be a great evil to get turned down; the number of men in this age range looking to suck dick was astounding and many of them were first-timers or guys with limited experience… and then they manage to meet me and a guy who’d been sucking dick since I was nine and, yeah, that tended to get me a lot of attention.

But it was about perspective, of course, because to me, it just was what it was; it wasn’t like I was the only guy who ever found out about this before puberty showed up but a lot of the guys I was engaging with were wowed and impressed and, sometimes, would express inadequacy because they didn’t have the years of experience that I did. To me, experience was nice but not required because I “judged” men based upon their desire to do it and how hungry they were to do it, first time or only for the ninth time in their whole life to date.

Helping a neighbor with something on his honey-do list and we’re joking around as we work and he hit me with a good crack and all I could do was laugh and say, “Aw, blow me…” – and got shocked when he asked, “Can I?” – and me asking the dumb question of, “Can you what?”

“Blow you,” he said, and I could see the lust and yearning in his eyes; was it there the whole time and I’d just missed it or did my quip open a door for him? The clock in my head was running; I knew that I had about five seconds to say something one way or the other but to me, it was like I had all week to think about how to respond to this. It wasn’t like I didn’t know the guy after living a couple of doors away from him for the last three years – but I didn’t know this!

So, I said that he could if he was serious and… yeah, he was seriously serious. We managed to suck each other off twice – he was surprised to learn that I was bisexual, and this wasn’t anything new to me – and we’re back to working on his project and he’s telling me that him wanting to suck guys off had to be some kind of mid-life crisis thing… right? I wasn’t so sure about that and said as much since, oh, maybe two weeks prior, a 40-year-old guy got his first cocksucking experience with me and he said that he didn’t feel like he was in some kind of crisis – it was something he wanted to do, and I happened along at the right place and time.

I was just then understanding that getting hit with this… didn’t have an age or time limit, you know, like this was something only pre-adult guys ‘experimented’ with, got over it, and went on to be dutifully heterosexual. Just when you think you have it all figured out, you find out that you don’t and there were middle-aged guys coming out of the woodwork and from unexpected directions looking to slake their lust and desire to suck dick. One such guy was a dude who had “finally decided” that he was really gay and that he needed to get to behaving like a gay man and… would I – could I – show him how to have sex with a man?

And me thinking, “You’re kidding, right?” He wasn’t and, in a way, it exposed a preconceived bias I had to think that if you’re gay, um, you should already know how to have sex with a guy. I think we both learned some stuff that day and I wasn’t too proud to stand corrected on my own misconceptions. Learning that with many of these guys, it wasn’t as if they didn’t know that guys could be cocksuckers, but they’d gotten hit with that disconnect that says if it’s someone else, well, that’s them and not us… and now it’s us and it’s a game changer and, yeah, must be that mid-life crisis thing.

The neighbor I’d helped with his project “broke the covenant” and told another of our male neighbors what we’d been up to, and this guy wanted in on the fun and after an extensive interview process on my part, he wasn’t exactly a suck buddy regular but if we happened to cross paths, sure, I have time if you do and, again, it was no big deal and not necessarily about sexuality in every situation although I was coming across men in this age group who were emerging bisexuals and were at the point in things where getting some dick was now the thing that had to be done.

It’s still one thing to think that you can do it. It’s not like you don’t know that you really want to – and no matter what you tell yourself to the contrary – but a lot of those guys found that being able to go through with it… wasn’t all that easy. Now, I’d experienced this with guys when I was between the ages of 19 and 25 and because I had, it gave me some insight as to how and why this same thing was different between the two differing age groups and the answer was… the older you are, the more stuff that has to be unlearned. Like, when you’re 19, you may not be “fully indoctrinated” into the heteronormative agenda and all that this means but when you’re 38, yeah – you have some learning to do and beginning with forgetting what you think you know about this.

Sometimes getting a kick to see a guy realize that you can watch men sucking dicks on porn all you want to and… it’s not going to help you throw down on a dick one bit. One guy said, “I thought that this would be easier…” and after it took him about 15 fifteen tries before he could take me in his mouth without the contents of his stomach coming to pay us both a visit.

“For some guys, well, they’re just a natural and I have no explanation as to why they are; for most guys, this is something they really do have to learn and it’s not always easy at first,” I said. “And try as they might, some guys never get the hang of it.”

One guy was so nervous that I thought he was going to hyperventilate and pass out as we sat naked on a hotel bed together.

“Why do I want to do this so badly?” he had asked. “It’s not like I’m gay or something!”

“Sometimes it’s not about sexuality,” I said. “Sometimes, it’s all about this being a new and different way to have sex and a lot of guys find that once they get this in their head, it’s almost impossible to get it out of there and, oh, yeah, doing it won’t make it go away either.”

He… didn’t believe me. He thought that this was one of those things that once you do it and get it out of your system, you’ll never be bothered by it again and, um, yeah, no – this ain’t one of those things but I will say that some guys have that strength of will and can make it a one and done experience. I was just… surprised at the number of men who were the same age I was who were, for all intents and purposes, just now discovering this kind of sex or they’d decided to take the plunge after x-amount of time convincing themselves that they didn’t have to or, yeah, just a mid-life crisis kind of thing.

I’m 36, he’s 38 and I suck him off and he says that I easily put his wife to shame in the cocksucking department and that had made him feel some kind of way that wasn’t all that good. I reminded him that while this was only like his second experience, I had “way too many” experiences under my belt and it was the first time that I told a guy, “As long as I’ve been doing this, I should be good at it!” I also pointed out the grave mistake he made: Comparing me to his wife and getting him to understand that all of us who suck cock has to learn how to do it and then be able to do it to the best of our ability to so.

“Women tend to be leery about sucking us off,” I said. “I’m not so that right there is a big difference to a lot of guys and one that’ll make a guy declare that I’m better than a woman and I don’t let such things go to my head and more so when I know women who can make me look like I can’t even suck my thumb, let alone a man’s dick.”

Many asked if this was a mid-life crisis thing for me and like it seemed to be for them and, nope – not my first rodeo and, again, a lot of guys were either impressed or taken aback at how young I was when I started sucking cock. Then the self-depreciation because now they’re talking to a very experienced guy about this and feeling inadequate or of a mind that they have to impress me and spending so much time disabusing them of such nonsense and getting them to focus on being able to do the best they can and with a goal to be as good at it as they can. Obviously, they were lessons I had to learn and once they understood that, well, if nothing else, it made them feel better about the choice they made to do this.

Those were great days of learning for me and, again, beginning with just when you think you have it all figured out, you really don’t because something always comes along that’s going to change the way you look at and understand these things.

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 17 October 23 @ 1442

I was, just now, re-reading a post about curing homosexuality by employing heterosexual sex (https://kdaddy23.wordpress.com/2020/08/04/todays-bisexual-thoughts-the-cure-for-homosexuality/) and my eyes locked onto the paragraph where I wrote about girls who found out that I liked dick (and like they did) deciding that they needed to save me from being gay… by giving it up to me and every chance they got to give it to me.

I had wondered, even back then, if it ever hit them that for someone they thought was gay, um, I knew my way around a pussy? Now, some of those girls knew that I wasn’t gay so trying to “cure” me was an excuse to have sex with me since I’d admit that I did eat pussy and loved doing it and, well, take it from there, if you will.

Getting older, I knew of a lot of guys who had a woman that found out that he was getting some dick on the side and the answer to this problem was to give him two or three times the sex he may (or may not) have been getting and with the thought that if she gave him a steadier diet of pussy, that would get rid of his need to have sex with other dudes. It occurred to me that this only worked on those guys who’d only sleep with another guy when he wasn’t getting any at all – but the moment they got some, they had no interest in sex with a guy… until they weren’t getting any again.

But for those men who were, in fact, getting some and as “regularly” as she would allow it, they’d tell me how tickled they were about their lady really laying the coochie on them but they’d also say that while this was nice and all that, when they wanted some dick, they weren’t really going to be or feel satisfied until they got some dick; they not only wondered about this but it was something that I’d been wondering about as well.

In the abovementioned post, I wrote about that thing people say about settling for hamburger when it’s steak that you wanted – but hamburger is ground steak and, yeah, it’s all beef, too. This was also a point in time when people still talked about bisexuality in terms of men or women, which implied one or the other but not both when it’s always been men and women and, yeah, you greedy freak… choose one or the other already!

I’m re-reading the post and thinking about poly wife #1 and her not liking the fact that I’m bisexual and sucking dick at almost every opportunity or when the need was there and… she’s going out of her way to suck my dick and suck me off and, yeah, I did ask her about it and she said that if she spends more time sucking my dick – and sucking me off – then I won’t need a guy doing it… and she couldn’t have been any more wrong about that and, I thought, she totally didn’t pay attention to what I said about this when we had that now-infamous conversation where she couldn’t seem to make the connection that I suck dick for a lot of same reasons she did.

That and me getting with guys wasn’t for them to suck me – it was for me to suck them and if they returned the favor, I wasn’t going to tell them no. I mean, we were already having sex no less than twice a day, every day and she managed to step up her game and now, it wasn’t unusual for me to have sex with her three or four times a day at times and all because she believed that if she really and seriously laid the pussy on me, I wouldn’t want to get with a guy so we could suck each other off… and found out that I still did and the reason why… just kept going over her head.

The “moral of the story” is that you can’t apply a “cure” to something doesn’t need curing but I get it: It seems to be so incongruent that a guy would want to have sex with another guy and then assume that if he isn’t gay, the answer and cure for his problem is to throw more pussy at him and, yeah, I knew of guys who were throwing the dick at their lady and a woman who also had a need to have sex with a woman and the key here is that she wasn’t doing that because of a lack of dick to begin with.

I reasoned that the flaw that causes this “attempt to cure” came from not paying attention to “and” and “or,” two simple connectors in the English language that, I dunno, once you get out of school and English class, you don’t really have a reason to pay attention to unless you wind up having that reason… and in the form of a bisexual man or woman who’d tell you that it’s men and women, not men or women and, for me, how incredulous I’d be to see how many people just didn’t seem to see how very different the two things were but, okay, I’m a guy and the only sex I should ever need in my life should only come from women and, welp, that’s not how it went down for me or anyone else for which and carried more meaning than or.

I’d find myself getting into hot and heavy conversations about this distinction and there are people telling me that I shouldn’t ever want both and, yeah, plenty of women who’d have sex with me and happily so and me saying, “Yeah, I know – you act like I’m not getting any pussy at all and I don’t know why you’d think that but when I want to suck a dick, women don’t have one – and I’m excluding hermaphrodites who can have both sets of sexual organs…”

One guys said, “Well, if your lady was giving it up more often, you wouldn’t need to suck a dick!” and I said, “Well, she gives it up to me whenever I want it… but what does that have to do with anything?” and I could see it in his face that he was having a slight problem suspending his beliefs long enough to be able to understand that the one thing has nothing to do with the other except for those guys who were out there getting some dick because they weren’t getting any pussy.

That’s a horse of a different kettle of fish. The many times I’ve heard women pitching all kinds of bitches about their man getting some dick and claiming to not understand why he’s doing it but, um, ask her if she’s fucking him and she isn’t – and here comes a slew of reasons why she’s not giving him any (and it’s all his fault that she isn’t, by the way) and me saying, “Well, if you’re not gonna fuck him, who’s supposed to?” which was a very rhetorical question because I already knew the answer.

Some women would say that they’d prefer that he cheated on her with another woman instead of wanting to sleep with a guy… but some of those same women had, in my opinion, good reasons for sleeping with other women and, yeah, that disconnect would show up to make this whole thing even messier. Or the women who’d get pissed with me when I’d point out to them that if they weren’t going to suck homey’s dick – off or otherwise – at some point, he’s going to find someone who will do it… and it just might be another guy. Oh, hell, no – that’s not how it’s supposed to go and they’re right in that assessment… but it is the way it can be and as I’d also point out to them, between us guys who aren’t gay, it’s… just sex and not that big of a deal.

In the mentioned post, I opined that the cure for bisexuality is… to let the bisexual be bisexual because so many bisexuals wind up having real problems they have to deal with because they aren’t allowed to be the way they are and especially those bisexuals in a relationship. The many men and women who, in my opinion, don’t seem to understand that if you’re dealing with a bisexual, cutting them off from having sex with you isn’t the answer because all you’re doing is “pushing” them into more same-sex stuff because needs always must and when those needs aren’t being addressed or taken care of, well, that becomes an even bigger problem.

Or that you can lay waste to them in the bedroom but if he or she gets that hankering for sex on the other side, they’re not going to be truly satisfied until they get some from over there; not that what they’re now getting is bad or unwanted, mind you but it’s not what they need and it’s hard to explain this to some people – and people who are of a mind that you should never need more – or anything other – than what you already have and if that’s not enough for you, well, too fucking bad; choose one or the other but never both… and who does that?

Bisexuals do. Men and women; for sex, relationships, or both. As opposed to those I would call “incidentally bisexual” – that would be the men and women who decide to take the plunge because they’re not getting the sex that they’re “supposed” to be getting but, again, once the drought is over, the last thing they’re thinking about is swimming in the deep end of the pool… until the drought comes back again. I reasoned, oh, so long ago, that this form of bisexuality is really wrong, although I knew some bisexuals who insisted that it was – but they weren’t looking at what I learned to look at: When someone needs sex, they’re pretty much going to do whatever they need to do in order to get it and if that mean getting into some of what we call gay sex, well, okay… because it’s better than not having sex at all.

“If I want steak, I’ll try to get steak… but I also might want a ham and cheese sandwich, too,” I mentioned someone who brought up the steak/hamburger analogy. “I could very well get the steak and enjoy it… and I still want the ham and cheese sandwich and I’m not going to happy or sated until I get the sandwich, too…”

They said I was greedy. I agreed with that assessment because just because I’m getting tons of pussy doesn’t mean that I wouldn’t want to suck a guy’s balls dry, too, and more so when this is the way I love to have sex – and has been for the longest time so I wear the “greedy badge” with a bit of pride or, as I’ve said to some people, “You’re just pissed off because I can do something that you don’t have the courage to do…” and if that sounds insulting, you’re right because I meant it to be an insult.

The “cure” for bisexuality isn’t being more heterosexual in things and more so when… there’s nothing to be “cured.” Back in the day and when girls were trying to save me from being gay, well, if they thought I was going to say no to the pussy, they were wrong about that because, um, I am a guy, after all. At first, did I feel bad about “stringing them along?” Yeah, I did until I realized that I’d only be stringing them along if I was claiming to be on my way to being gay and only some pussy would save me. I mean, how many times can I say that I’m not gay before it occurs to you that I’m not?

And you can give me the pussy several times a day, every day, and when I want to suck a dick, I want to suck a dick and I’m not going to be happy until I do it… but it’s never like I’m not going to enjoy the pussy; seriously, I might be crazy but I sure ain’t insane! And after you’ve given me a lot of pussy, we’ll go our separate ways and there’s a great chance that I’ll run into a guy who wouldn’t mind us getting together and sucking each other off… because why the hell not? Not because the pussy was “bad” or unwanted but because I’m bisexual and, well, this is how we can have sex.

Men and women. Not men or women and I used to get pretty miffed to hear people telling me to choose one the other – and to choose one over the other (and that answer had better be pussy); which do I like the most? If you had to choose between… yeah, if you’ve never had to listen to these questions, you really do get tired of having them thrown your way.

You can’t cure something that doesn’t need curing and the fact that I’d want some dick, too, doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with me – but if you’re not of a mind to believe me, well, that’s not my problem but, yeah, there have been those who made it my problem and, okay – let’s sit down so I can explain some facts of life that you clearly don’t know about or believe in…

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 10 October 23 @ 1324

I’m in the opening moments of sucking a guy’s dick when I hear him ask, “You really enjoy doing this, don’t you?”

I stop, look up at him and asked, “If I didn’t, do you think that I’d be doing it?” I went on to say something about it not making sense to do something that you didn’t really like doing and went back to reducing him to speaking in tongues and other vocalizations that I had to learn to not make me start laughing as I gulped down his cum.

Sucking dick is hot, sweaty work and now I’m trying to cool down while he’s calming down and once he does, he moves to start sucking me but he hesitates for a moment and asks, “Does it make me a bad person because I only do this because I’m expected to? That I don’t get a lot of pleasure out of doing it?”

I allowed that it didn’t make him a bad person but if he was going to suck me because he was obligated to, well, maybe he shouldn’t do it – and I knew all too well what it was like to be sucked by someone who really didn’t want to do it but, again, felt obligated to and, usually, because they gave their word that they were going to do it.

In a way, I knew what he was talking about because I’d had those moments where I found myself sucking a guy’s dick and not really feeling it – but I gave my word when we agreed to suck each other off and going back on your word, well, that’s never a good thing unless you have a damned good reason to. But in those moments, I also had to admit that there would come a point where I’d get into it and, well, okay – I might not have been feeling it when I started but I’m deep into it now but after talking with this guy, he admitted that he just couldn’t get into it and like I obviously could.

For me, it was yet another lesson about why we have sex like this and not so much what sex is happening. The guy did blow me and get me off and I thought that he did a very good job in the doing but now understood that he was just going through the motions more than anything else and that in his younger days, he did feel that if a guy sucked him off, he was obligated to return the favor. I understood this but I’m from the school of if you don’t really feel like doing it, then don’t do it but, yeah, I’m severely biased about it.

He asks me what I had to do to be able to get so deep into it and… I didn’t have an answer for him because from the very first time I had a dick in my mouth, I loved the shit out of it and there was no such thing as not getting deep into it and, again, if you’re not going to have fun doing it, why bother to do it? More experiences taught me those hard lessons when sucking a guy off wasn’t fun for me at all, but I also learned to take those moments in stride and to look for any moment when I did, in fact, have fun with what I was doing.

When it’s obligatory, eh, the blowjob might be good and gets the job done but where’s the fun in it? I was learning a lot about obligatory blowjobs from girls/women who said that they only sucked the guy’s dick because it was expected of them or, again, they had an obligation to, and those two things seemed to sour cocksucking for them. Or those times when I’m about to have sex with a girl and she says that if I expect her to suck my dick, well, guess again (but I’d better eat her pussy or else) and, indeed, experiencing a lack of joy to be eating a pussy because it was expected and obligatory or just being taken out of the mood, either by my own doing or something she said that didn’t sit well with me but I said I was going to eat her and, again, you give your word, you keep it.

If such things did nothing else, it gave me a greater appreciation toward anyone who’d suck my dick because they could have said no, and they didn’t really have to if they really didn’t want to and if you’re of a mind that you’re not going to have fun sucking me, I’d prefer that you not do it and no hard feelings if you don’t.

Another guy tells me that he’s not really into it but the only reason why he sucks dick is because… that’s what’s expected and the “bad part” is that I knew he was right about that. I tell him that if he’s not really into it, then I’m not expecting him to do something that’s not really to his liking; he tells me that he’s gonna do it anyway because… he gave his word that he would, which had me wondering why you’d give your word to do something that you really don’t like doing but, again, severely biased cocksucking guy over here and this isn’t about me – it’s about those guys who’d suck my dick because it was expected of them and they kinda/sorta don’t want to, either in that moment or on the whole of things.

Being very aware of the perception of things, i.e., if you’re a guy who has sex with other guys, you suck dick as a matter of course… but the truth, as always, is quite different – but I felt that you had to “be on the inside” of this to know and understand the truth that can be found in this. And being able to understand the honor involved in giving your word that you’re going to do this… and even if you’d rather eat glass with a side of sandpaper than to suck the other guy’s dick (and deal with his cum).

I’ve had a lot of guys make sucking them a nightmare for me; I started out having big time fun, but their words or actions just kicked me out of the mood and now, well, I started it so I might as well finish it and… we’re going to have a conversation when I’m done. I’ve had guys piss me off so much that I had to learn to… stop. No, I am not going to finish what I started because you’re being an asshole about it, and I don’t care if I gave my word or not because you made this into not being a fun thing for me to do and why the fuck should I make you happy when you’ve made me not want to finish things?

Then again, I’d long since learned why females are loath to suck dick – and even if they really want to and want to get all into it. Or, as one woman said to me, “I’m not gonna suck your dick because you expect me to!” and I’m like, “No, I do not expect you to do it and you don’t have to if you don’t want to!” but I understood that not only did she not want to suck dick out of that sense of expectation, because I’m a guy, I’m… guilty by association and now I’m not going to be sucked by her because of something someone else instilled in her.

And, no – she didn’t believe a word I said about not expecting her to do it.

With guys, it’s… different. You either suck dick or you don’t and if you say that you do, then you are, in fact, expected and required to suck the dick because it’s an honor thing along with the perception that all guys who suck cock are totally gung-ho to do it when, really, they’re only doing it because they are expected to. I go back to those days when I was introducing a new guy at least once or twice a week and their biggest concern and fear was… having to suck my dick in return. I knew that for some guys, the mere thought of sucking a guy’s prick was some very scary shit to begin with but I was becoming aware that some new guys would suck me in return… because that’s the way it goes or they thought that I expected them to and being exposed to this had me changing the way I went about this with new guys and letting them know that if I suck them, they are under no obligation or expectation to suck me in return and… it’s okay because not all guys can get their head around giving head in the first place.

Didn’t matter if I really wanted my dick sucked because this first experience wasn’t about me and I can always jerk myself off so any reluctance on their part wasn’t that big of a deal for me and I understood that a guy could give his word – and he had the right to change his mind about it, too. And I had to disabuse myself of this one: Just because I loved the shit out of sucking dick, the other guy had to as well and it really doesn’t work that way.

And this is on top of sucking a guy off and he’s in that refractory period of things and he just does not want anything to do with continuing to have sex – and they do it anyway and knowing that, again, they’d rather eat glass. I’ve had guys get me off first and, yuck – got any glass handy? – but I learned to shake it off and suck him off because I did give my word that I would but I gotta fight through refraction so that I can get to my deeply seat joy of sucking dick because if I’m not going to have fun doing it, chances are he’s not going to enjoy it all that much… and I did not ever want to be known as that guy who didn’t know how to suck cock and that guy who reneges on his word.

Oh, fuck no. The only reason I won’t do it is if a guy gives me a reason not to and, yeah, if he does – and a lot of guys do, by the way – then I’m not going to keep sucking him when I’d rather punch him in the face for stealing my joy in this. I don’t know how many times I’ve stopped sucking a guy to tell him that I don’t need his help sucking his dick; just lie there and let me do what I know how to do. Yeah, I know that at some point, he’s going to start fucking into my mouth and that’s fine but, yeah – guys watch porn and it’s a bad influence on them when it comes to them getting their dick sucked.

The funny thing is that I’ve had more “bad moments” eating pussy than I have sucking dick, from getting my teeth loosened to bloody noses, my neck getting sprained, almost getting choked out and/or smothered, practically getting mugged while doing it and coming close to drowning when eating squirters.

There’s just nothing worse than someone sucking your dick out of expectation/obligation and there’s no passion in it. Maybe it’s just me but moments like that makes me feel bad for the other guy and I’ve stopped them so I could tell them that, look – if you really don’t want to do this, then don’t do it. It’s okay and I can jerk off or you can jerk me off if you want to and it’s a thing that has had some guys bust my ass for… caring about the other guy too much. Yeah, he said he was going to suck me off and I should make them do it anyway and, well, that’s just wrong and more so when no one is going to make me do it if, by chance, I don’t want to, whether I changed my mind or the other guy gave me reason to.

One guy said that I was… prissy about it and I bridled at it because I’m not prissy about it – but since this is supposed to be an enjoyable thing guys can do for each other, um, I’m more about it being enjoyable for both of us so, yeah – if you ain’t really feeling it, then don’t do it.

Back when I had my boyfriend, he had me wondering if he was sucking my dick because he was obligated to or because he thought I expected him to because, whew – that guy loved sucking my dick and in that “too good to be true” kind of way. When I asked him about it, he… ripped me a new one and I deserved it even though he found my question to be reasonable. One of the things we found that we had in common was that we were both cocksucking fiends of the highest order and fiends who found and took a lot of pleasure in the doing and expectation/obligation had nothing to do with how hyped he was to suck my dick and to the point where, as I’ve said before, he’d pounce on me and blow me and no matter what I happened to be doing and, okay – so it’s gonna be like that, huh? Hold my beer, my love… and grow some eyes in the back of your head.

He even said that even if he wasn’t madly in love with me, he would be hyped to suck my dick because it was his favorite thing to do and… I had to accept that because it’s my favorite thing to do as well. Still, I got to understand the expectation/obligation thing and I don’t necessarily agree with it despite understanding it. Honor for me says that if I tell you that I’m going to give you head, I’m giving it and to the best of my ability to do so… unless I change my mind about it or, again, whoever I’m giving head to gives me a reason to change my mind about continuing to get them off this way… and I try hard not to change my mind because where’s the fun in not doing it?

I found that it’s one thing if a guy is leery about doing it and if so, don’t sweat it – you don’t have to if you don’t want to; it’s another thing when he changes his mind about it and now he goes for it and usually because the heat of the moment gets involved – and now we’re having a talk about how and why he didn’t want to do it but something “made” him do it and, um, it wasn’t that bad.

It’s something else when a guy starts to suck you and you know that his heart isn’t in it and he’s only doing it because he gave his word, he thinks that I expect him to, or he feel obligated. It’s not that getting blown under these “conditions” is always a bad thing since a lot of guys are very technically proficient in the ways of sucking cock… but you can always tell that they’d rather eat glass and there’s no… passion driving what he’s doing and now it a matter of me just going with it or being put off about it… but I understand the honor thing all too well and when it’s been me not really feeling it all that much, well, you gave your word – now, try to have some fuck sucking him and, thankfully, I learned how to find the fun in it… because it’s very much a damned fun thing to do.

Yeah, um, God, Jesus, and your mother aren’t going to save you when I get my mouth on you, dude, so you can call them but, well, yeah. That. I had to learn to accept that some guys think that I’m not all that good at sucking them and that stings like alcohol on a fresh cut – but now it comes down to did I have fun doing it? I sure did but, nope, you can’t please everyone every time and I’d be a fool and an idiot trying to please everyone and expecting them to be pleased.

And you probably know that I learned this one the hard way. Sucking a guy’s dick is… personal and very intimate even though there are some guys who don’t think that it is. Ditto for eating pussy but, yeah – orally fixated dude over here and I revel in it because it doesn’t make sense not to and, besides, she could tell me that she didn’t want me to eat her so I’m grateful… and very damned eager to get in there and feast.

And it’s just me in these things. If you do it out of expectation or obligation, well, I’d prefer that you not do it, but I also understand the honor that’s involved, too. I know that some guys suck dick and it’s not really their thing to do and like I know that if you’re a cocksucker, guys… expect you to suck their cock and as a matter of course and I understand this, too – but I don’t agree with it.

 

Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 03 October 23 @ 1339

I’ve been sitting here for the last half hour trying to decide if it feels different to suck a friend’s dick and as opposed to sucking an anonymous hookup’s dick and… I keep thinking, “Yes and no…” over and over but I think my “problem” is that I think more about the act than the person I’m performing it with and, no, not like they’re not important because they are but for the last half hour, I’ve been cycling through every friendly dick I’ve ever sucked and rolling my eyes at “anonymous hookup” because the moment introductions are made, are they really that anonymous?

But, yeah, sure, I’ve been places, have run into a like-minded guy and off we go to suck each other, and does it feel different to suck the guy’s dick because we just met twenty minutes ago or does it feel different with the guy I’ve known for twenty years and is it supposed to feel different to suck familiar dick?

My brain keeps saying, “In either case, it’s still sucking dick, isn’t it?” and I’m having a hard time disagreeing with this rather obvious fact. Admittedly, I have… enjoyed sucking a friend because of the familiarity we have with each other and a level of trust that has been built, established, and in effect for x-amount of time but there’s something… wicked about sucking the dick of a guy you just met and that level of familiarity is absent and not much in the way of trust has been established outside of gentlemanly honor (and for what that’s worth at times).

But like a lot of bi guys I know, they are always thinking about “who” first and foremost and while this isn’t wrong for them to think this way it often overshadows the “what” – the act of sucking a guy’s dick and… why would it feel different and by “feel,” what exactly is meant?

This, by the way, was a question asked on the forum and almost all of the members who have responded have said that they prefer to suck a friend’s cock over a hookup’s cock… but few have spoken to how it feels or, again, bothered to define what “feel different” means in this context but I’m thinking emotionally more than actual tactile sensations.

See, the thing about a so-called anonymous hookup is that if you come into contact with a guy and a conversation starts, um, is the hookup still anonymous since I’ll say most of the guys I know looking to hookup with another guy will not do it without knowing something about the other guy and it will not go well for you to lie or otherwise try to deceive us. Even the guys who insist that you don’t need to know them down to the size of their underwear level go from being an unknown to a known quantity and anonymity, well, maybe it’s me but that’s gone out the window the moment we lay eyes on each other.

I thought the question was a “sneaky” way to ask if it’s better to suck a friend’s dick over sucking a dick belonging to someone who isn’t a friend and now the whole question can go off on a tangent because… friends aren’t supposed to have sex with each other but in these things, it has always been better the devil you know than the one you don’t.

I’ve felt wonderful sucking a friend’s dick… and the same when sucking the guy I’ve spent x-amount of thing trying to determine if he’s safe enough to do this with and all that so he might not be a friend as such… but it sure felt good to suck his dick just the same. But I’m going to have to hit the forum and ask the OP what he meant by it “feeling different” because, to me, it’s creating differences that don’t really exist because, sure and duh, every dick is different and whether it’s the devil you know or the one you barely know… but this is still about who and no one except yours truly has said that it’s the thrill of knowing you’re about to suck a guy’s dick that’s, well, thrilling and, at least for me that thrill feels the same and regardless to it being friendly dick or I just met homey ten minutes ago at the gas station and we found each other… doable.

I’m thinking this is an emotional question and, as such, I’m not surprised at how some of the members are responding and beginning with the phrase, “I prefer” which got me to asking if this is really about preferences more than being into the act of sucking dick and my own stance that… I prefer to suck dick and who gets sucked is… open. Friend or hookup doesn’t really matter to me because why should it?

But if “feels different” is about emotions, sure – sucking familiar dick is comfortable and “safe” and, as one member said, you know where all of his buttons are but at the same time, being an experience cocksucker, I know where the buttons are supposed to be and I’m all about finding them and pushing the fuck out of them and, really, while I am very much aware of whose dick I’m sucking, I’m… not thinking about him – but I am thinking about how fucking good it feels to suck dick and how it’s making me feel in the doing and provided that the guy I’m sucking isn’t “distracting” me in some way.

I sat and thought for that half hour and saw that I give the same level of oral effort to familiar dick and not-so-familiar dick because, really and seriously, if I even think that the not-so-familiar guy is “unsuitable,” nothing’s going to happen. I understand that in the hookup game, there are a gazillion guys who’ll give a fake name and under the auspices of discretion – and, yeah, I’ve done it at times and just for the fun of it but when it’s close to the time to get down to the nitty gritty and homey is just flat out lying about himself, hmm… what else might he be lying about?

And that includes friendly dick, too… but does sucking familiar versus not-so-familiar really feels different? I would say that I’ve been doing it long enough that if there is a difference, it’s very likely one I don’t care much about because I’m all about sucking dick and reveling in the feelings in the doing and enjoying the “ego trip” of getting him to give up the cum.

I really had to think about this one despite not really knowing the context of what “feels different” means to the OP – and I’m going to ask him and see what he has to say about it so… sit tight for a moment.

*switching to the forum at 1441*

*back at 1442*

Okay, so, I re-read what the OP said and he did speak to what “feels different” means, i.e., when it’s a friend, do you care about his pleasure more, respect for him, the bond you share, stuff like that and, okay, with standing a bit corrected, um, well, sure – I respect him as a man and friend; I relish the bond we have that allows this to happen; do I care about his pleasure more? Eh, don’t get me telling any lies because I long since understood that I don’t particularly give head to anyone and 100% for their pleasure; yes, indeed, I want them to enjoy the fuck out of what I’m doing but as mentioned before, I’ve been called selfish in this because I give head… because I love doing it and I love the way it makes me feel and if I’m feeling wonderful in the doing, there’s a 99.9% chance that they’re feeling wonderful, too.

And whether they’re familiar dick or not-so-familiar… and I recognize that I’m… probably weird about it when compared to other guys. The OP asks how it feels when a friend is cumming in your mouth as opposed to a “stranger” who just wants to use you and, um, again, I know it’s me but if a friend is cumming in my mouth, did he not use me as well?

I would say that he did and I understand this about… people. Familiar or otherwise. You… use and get used and I would say that this post asks more about caring more than anything else or, if I may, does sucking a familiar dick attached to a guy you care about feel different from sucking the dick of a guy that you have no “caring feelings” about and the only thing he cares about is getting sucked off and, well, for me, it’s still a yes and no answer because of where my focus is… and it’s on the pleasure I get out of sucking dick first and foremost and, yeah, I long since got over the fact that even my friends have and will use me to get their rocks off and now it come down to whether I mind being used or not.

Does it feel different to blow a friend I care about versus blowing a guy and the only things he cares about is that I’m sucking his dick and I’m Black? Yes… and no because that’s not where my focus is and, yeah, if I didn’t think he was okay to suck, he wouldn’t get sucked. When it comes to giving head to anyone, I was taught to always give the best head I can give and learned to have big time fun giving the best I know how to give because my ego doesn’t want it to be said that I don’t give good head… and I don’t see the sense in differentiating between familiar and not-so-familiar and more so when, again, the other guy might start out not being all that familiar but that’s not going to last very long because just sucking dick is damned familiar to me and, yeah, I want it to be good for him but not as a primary focus.

Yes, I’m selfish. I accept that about myself. The friends I have sucked have tended to take me for granted; they know that if they want their dick sucked really good, they know where and how to find me and are, as such, using me… and just like the guy I might meet standing in line at the bank is going to do if we were to get to talking and find that we have this in common, we’re both horny, and we have the time and place to do some sucking.

I’m using them just as much as they’re using me and, as such, it’s not… all that different where familiar versus not-so-familiar goes because… it’s not about them; it’s about me making myself feel incredibly good to give head and if they benefit (and I want them to), it’s a win/win for the both of us. But like I said, I recognize that I’m… probably weirder than most guys are about it because my sole focus isn’t totally on their pleasure and, yes, with the familiar and not-so-familiar, I have failed to please them but as the saying goes, you can’t please everyone, and you can’t do it every time.

The bond with a guy – and at the level where, like I said yesterday, it just makes sense for us to have sex with each other can be pretty deep and emotionally satisfying – even if we don’t have sex. There are some guys you can’t bond with to this degree, of course, but, um, I’ve blown them because there’s nothing wrong with helping out a friend in his time of need and now it’s a matter of whether either of us minds or not and if he doesn’t mind, I’m probably not going to mind… unless he gives me reason to.

The not-so-familiar guy, well, he’s a different story, isn’t he? What I think makes a difference is (a) how we came across each other and (b) what the circumstances and situation were, like, meeting him while standing in line at Burger King and waiting to be waited on or waiting for our food. In this, I had to learn how to read someone since, um, I’ve screwed the pooch and rather unpleasantly before I learned how to do this; I learned to use my ability to think quickly and as completely as possible because when it’s a spontaneous meeting/situation, there are only mere minutes to decide to say yes or no and solely based upon what he’s saying, how he’s saying and if his body language is “matching” the words he’s saying.

Oh, yeah – it’s a process and one that I learned to be good at and… I’m not exactly new to this version of The Game and I can play it with the best of them and, importantly, I trust my instincts and, yeah, more than I’m likely to trust a friend – and they have yet to fail me and keep me safe and all that good stuff.

Now it’s all about getting into the moment of sucking the dick and, yeah, using the guy for my own pleasure and always being of a mind to do the best I know how to do because I do not like to fail… but, again, I know that I can and I have failed both the familiar and not-so-familiar… damn it all to hell.

However, this is me… and not a lot of guys I know about these days. It’s about… the desire and passion that drives this within me (my very oral fixation) and does the familiar dick get a bit more… attention than the not-so-familiar one? Yes… and no because it’s sucking dick.

Being inside my head about this is interesting, huh? It’s interesting to see how the membership has responded to the OP’s question because it tells me something about them and how the dynamic is constantly changing when it comes to sucking dick. Is it different if the two of us are kinda/sort “into” each other? Yes… and not really. Is it some perceived difference in not being used by that which is familiar? I don’t think so because when we have sex, we do very much use each other to reach the desired results: Getting him to bust that nut.

And really understanding that the not-so-familiar guy isn’t going to be all that unfamiliar by the time dicks come out to be sucked… because anything else is kind of reckless. I’ve gotten hit on by guys I didn’t know to suck them off and, okay, hold up – who are you and why should I do that (and what even makes you think that I’m down with that but that’s another scribble)? Do I believe that their name is “Tim?” Maybe. Not really and I have asked guys if I can see their license/ID and if they refuse to, well, guess what ain’t gonna happen.

Horny as fuck… but never stupid… and I only trust those friends as far as I can see them because experience has taught me that if there’s someone who’d “do me dirty,” it’s the devil I know more than the one I don’t. A friend is more likely to “take advantage” of me than the guy I just met in the produce section, and we got to joking about the eggplants there and, um, neither of us are all that opposed to checking out each other’s eggplants for, um, taste, feel, and flavor. Oh, he’s looking to take advantage of me, too – and I’m sure as fuck about to take advantage of him, too – and we both know this so it’s a different that doesn’t make a difference all that much.

But a lot of men these days are all about that which is familiar, and I understand it and laugh since, again, we say that friends can’t have sex with each other because it’ll ruin the friendship, but I’ve maintained that if you can’t have sex with a friend, who can you have sex with?

Oh, right – that would be the guy who just wants the two of us to suck each other off and thank you very much and it can be just as good with this guy as it can be with the one you’re familiar with… because it’s still about sucking dick and what that means to the guy doing the sucking.

How say you on this, readers? Is it different with the devil you know versus the one you don’t? So many guys are of a mind that it is different – and that includes my protege because I cannot leave him out of this because he’s very much about the devil he knows and still “fearful” of the one he doesn’t know… but he’s learning and is still a work-in-progress.