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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: The Art

“How does one go about sucking cock?”

“What’s the best way to suck a dick?”

These questions have been around since forever, haven’t they? Saw on the new forum where some guy said that he very much wants to suck cock and asked the membership how to do it. The membership responded by pointing the OP to a few sets of videos that, I dunno, are the cat’s pajamas where mastering the art of cock sucking is concerned… and I don’t doubt that they are great visual examples of the many techniques that can be employed to make a guy’s dick hard and, hopefully, entice him to spill his load and shrink back into happy flaccidity.

Time for another back in the day segment! The way those of us who sucked cock learned how to do it was… to do it and then get feedback from the guy you were doing it to even as you were doing it – go faster, slower, do it harder, ow, not so hard, yeah, right there, that’s the spot and, oh, shit, I’m gonna cum…

One of the things you find out is that what works for one dick might not work on the same dick the next time you suck it… let alone the next dick you might suck but, yeah, sure, it pays to learn and develop the techniques that, even before the advent of the Internet, there were quite a few books on the subject. And one can, with practice and patience, learn the techniques… but does technique alone make for what would one consider to be a damned good blow job?

I’d run into a guy who was willing to learn how to suck dick and they’d ask what’s the best way to go about doing it and the usual answer was, “You do it the way you’d want your dick to be sucked!” and, no, I wasn’t the only one to say this and many of us agreed that this was a great way to go about it as long as you didn’t mind or wouldn’t get upset by being critiqued along the way so that whatever you were doing would make the other guy feel good enough to bust his nuts wide open. The problem with this approach was, um, what if the guy asking the question had never had anyone suck his dick?

Oops.

Well, one way around this was to get the guy to agree to having his dick sucked and, if he could, pay attention and take some notes which, admittedly, was kinda hard to do when someone is sucking your dick for the first time. Still, the bottom line to all of this was that if you wanted to suck dick and wanted to be good at it, you learned by doing; you not only learned the techniques that you could learn and you’d find out that all cocks don’t respond well to technique because, duh, not only are all dicks different (but the same) but the owners are all different. Still, you also got an important lesson in the other thing that makes someone a good or bad cock sucker: Desire or passion.

Technique is all good but if you don’t have the desire or passion to drive the technique, hmm, might that present itself as a bit of a problem at some point? Then there’s this: Who determines whether or not the techniques applied are effective, the person doing it… or the person receiving it?

Deep-throating is a technique but one not everyone can do, let alone master… but do you have to do this in order to successfully suck a dick? Many agree that, indeed, it’s a nice technique to have in your cock sucking portfolio but it’s also not always a necessity and more so if you can’t manage to pull it off but, sure, if you can, ya get props for it.

You can learn the techniques but I maintain that if your skills aren’t driven by your passion and desire to do this, does technique really mean a whole lot? Okay… not picking on women but a classic example comes in the form of those women who have amazing cock sucking technique… but, for them, it’s a chore that ranks below cleaning toilets or it’s purely obligatory and something that might make the guy on the receiving end very happy but, bleh, doing it really ain’t doing shit for her other than making her jaws ache, perhaps getting her all sweaty while doing it and messing up her hair, and making other parts of her body achy and depending on the position she’s in while doing it.

You can learn the techniques and have plenty of passion and desire driving those techniques you’ve honed over the whole time you’ve been sucking cock… and ya still might not get the desire effect because of something else that cock suckers eventually learn, namely, some guys do not know how to get their dick sucked as well as a lot of folks have it in their mind that face fucking is cock sucking… and it isn’t.

Then there’s this thing: If someone is gonna suck your dick, you just assume that they know how to not only suck cock… but how you want and need to have your cock sucked or those folks who have it in their mind that if you’ve sucked one dick, you’ve sucked all dicks… but if the receiver is telling you what he wants you to do to heighten or maintain his pleasure, some folks catch an attitude about being told about something that they know how to do and have been doing it for x-amount of time.

It’s been kinda/sorta proven that if you look at this as a chore or an obligatory act, you can have the best technique of all time… and the recipient isn’t going to be as thrilled with your efforts as you might think he should be. Guys are forever talking about good blow jobs and bad ones and the bad ones aren’t always the ones where “proper cock sucking technique” isn’t applied.

It’s the lack of desire or passion that usually lends itself to a blow job being bad. There’s this question I’ve heard asked at times: Which is more important, experience or enthusiasm? A lot of guys agree that technique, such as it is, is fine and dandy but what pushes them over the edge – and, sometimes before they wanna get shoved over the edge – is the enthusiasm in which they’re being blown or, as I like to say about this, the difference between liking do to it and loving it. There are those who can suck dick because, duh, they know how to… then there are those who absolutely, positively love doing it and they may not really care a whole lot about whether they’re using proper technique or not because, for them, there’s great pleasure for them doing it and it’s not always about getting pleasure from making him feel really good.

This begs the other question that comes up in association in this: When you’re sucking cock, um, who are you doing it for – him… or for yourself? So while a newbie cock sucker is right to be concerned with how to suck a dick, it’s my belief and contention that it’s also very damned important to know why you’re sucking on a dick and, again, are you doing it because it’s gonna make him happy or are you doing it because it’s satisfying something within you?

I’ll tell a newbie quick, fast, and in a hurry that learning the techniques is fine… but if you don’t have that deep desire and passion to suck cock, well, what’s the point in doing it? Oh, yeah, that’s right – some guy will be quite happy to have his dick in your mouth and even happier should you succeed in getting him to cum… and I’ve always questioned whether or not this is always a good reason to do it and does it really equate to one’s personal desire and passion to do it in the first place.

The answer is… there’s no right answer because whether you do it for someone else or you do it for your own personal pleasure, at the end of the cock sucking session, it’s gonna come down to what the recipient thinks of your body of work because, fuck, you can employ every technique you can bring to bear, have all the desire and passion you can muster and if he doesn’t think you were all that, well, that’s a fail where he’s concerned even if you’ve had a grand time sucking him.

How do you suck a dick? The best way you can and with all the desire, passion and, yes, persistence as you can bring to the table. Can you learn how to suck a dick by watching someone else do it? You could learn the techniques easily enough… but watching someone sucking cock on a screen isn’t going to give you much insight on what having a dick in your mouth feels like, what it tastes like; watching how the guy on the screen is reacting isn’t going to really be indicative of how a guy’s gonna react when it’s your mouth on his cock, nor does watching a screen convey the other things involved with cock sucking, like how all of your senses are at play when you’re doing it and, even better, whatever is going on in your head as you go about giving head.

To this end, if you were to ask a guy what he’s thinking about when he’s sucking dick, he’d probably tell you he’s not thinking about anything other than sucking the dick and working toward making the guy cum… and that’s not what’s really going on between your ears – it’s just that one tends to not be focused on whatever else is going on, like, you’re sucking on the dick and you’re also thinking about how much time you have to get it done, what other things you gotta do after you finish, thinking about what things you need to be doing to him to coax him into busting and, for some guys, there’s this ever-present thought or concern about not getting caught with a dick in your mouth, so on and so forth.

You wanna learn how to suck a dick? Go suck one. You can, again, easily learn the techniques involved but no one can teach you desire or passion – those are things that, in my opinion, can only be learned and discerned by doing it and, get this, by failing to get the guy to cum which, by the way, might not always be your fault; some guys are quick to blame a bad blow job on the person doing it and, perhaps, without giving much thought to the fact that if it was deemed bad, uh, they’re the reason why it was because, once more, you can ask a guy what’s going on in his head when he’s having his dick sucked… and he’ll tell you nothing is going on and that he’s only thinking about how good it feels and how good it’s gonna feel when he busts… and if he does… because his mind is thinking about a whole lot of things other than what’s going on between his legs.

There’s a lot that goes into learning how to suck a dick and technique isn’t the alpha and omega of it… but I still maintain that if you wanna learn the art of fellatio and master it, go suck some dick and learn your own way to do this instead of learning how someone else says you should be doing it.

 
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Posted by on 18 February 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: I Remember…

…the first time I had to explain to a girl why I liked sucking cock. I was in junior high school and the bell had just rung signalling the end of fifth period and there was a flurry of activity as we all fled from one classroom and heading for the next one when a guy walked up to me, tapped me on the shoulder to get my attention, and handed me a note.

“That girl right there told me to give this to you,” he said, pointing to her and I followed his finger and, sure enough, there was this rather nice looking girl who was nodding at me as if to confirm that she was the one who sent the note.

I thanked him and wondered a couple of things. One, why didn’t she just come over and hand me the note herself but, importantly, who was she? I didn’t know her but as I kept hustling to my next class, I though maybe she knew my sister – we both went to the same school. I opened the note and all it said was, “Meet me after school at the side door – we need to talk about something!”

Okay… this just got very weird and to the point where I was distracted for the rest of the school day wondering who she was and, now, what the hell we needed to talk about. Needless to say, the end of seventh period – and the school day – couldn’t come fast enough so I can solve this mystery.

I meet the girl at the appointed place – let’s call her Pam – and as we started walking away from the school, the first thing she says is, “I hear you suck dick.”

I was shocked, of course, and my mind is ablaze with activity trying to figure out how she found out, who might have ratted me out about this, and while trying to form a response to what she said and my response was, “Huh?”

Yeah… very articulate and intelligent coming from a straight-A student, wouldn’t you say? I recovered and asked, “Where’d you hear that?”

She said, “My brother told me.” and now I’m trying to figure out who her brother is or was but she saved me the trouble by telling me his name – let’s call him Jim. Once she said his name, my face got really hot because just last Saturday, me and a guy I’d met named Jim pretty much spent the entire day sucking each other off until neither of us could get it up again.

“I didn’t know he was your brother,” I said but before I could say anything else, she waved me off and said, “I just wanna know why you like sucking dick. I know why he does – he likes boys but you don’t look like the type of guy who just likes boys.”

“I like girls,” I said, my voice sounding rather lame to my ears.

“Good,” she said. “Now, you wanna tell me why?”

I figured that I didn’t have anything to lose at this point since she obviously knew what Jim and I had done last Saturday so I might as well tell her… and discovered that I couldn’t put it into words to save my life and it didn’t help my thinking having her “badgering” me for an answer and I finally wound up saying, “I like doing it because I like doing it!”

Yeah… once again, my high IQ failed to demonstrate that it was, indeed, quite high given how stupid I sounded. She started asking me a bunch of questions; when was the first time I sucked a dick, how many times had I sucked a dick, did I really like it and what did I do when a guy shot in my mouth? What did it feel like for me? What was I thinking when I was doing it?

Thanks to her questions, little by little, I was kinda/sorta able to answer her original question but I made it a point to remember all those questions so that if someone ever asked me again, at least I had an “outline” in my mind so I could explain something that, apparently, wasn’t easy to explain, not to mention how embarrassing it was.

Her next question was, “So… if you really do like girls, do you eat pussy?”

Okay… where did that come from? Even as I pondered this, I could literally feel my face light up like the proverbial Christmas tree and my voice saying, “Hell, yeah I do!” – and, please, keep in mind that this wasn’t what I had planned to say at all.

So… the end of this part of the story is that we got to her house, went to her room and had some very amazing sex and as I continued to walk home afterward, I was even more stunned at this turn of events since it was well known that girls had very low opinions of guys who sucked dick and I never figured out – or asked her – if we had had sex (and was still having it) because I sucked dick, ate pussy, or had no issues about doing both.

I learned that day that explaining it is never easy… even when you know the answer like you know the back of your hand and the explaining gets even harder when you’re trying to explain it to someone who’s already made up their mind that no guy has a good reason for sucking another guy’s dick… and explaining it to some women is harder… and you’d think it wouldn’t be but is the reason for me invoking what’s considered to be bad conversational form by answering a question with a question: “Why do you suck dick? If you know why you like doing it, doesn’t it make sense that I like doing it for the same reason you do?”

Ah… apparently not. I’ve had this conversation with women so many times that even when I think about them, I can feel my body just tense up and a dull ache appears somewhere in my head. In talking to other guys who’ve had this conversation, the one question we’ve never been able to answer is why women don’t seem to get this one thing we have in common with them. Now, some women do get it; some find it exciting to know a guy who knows his way around a dick like she does while some are… indifferent? about it or maybe its just that you’re really not telling them anything they didn’t already know, namely, guys who aren’t gay do suck dick and you’re just another one of those guys.

It took me a whole lot of years to get my head around why some women go ballistic about a guy doing something that they themselves have done – doesn’t really matter if they like doing it, love doing it, or could care less about doing it but a lot of women take knowing this as a personal affront to them or, as I had asked one woman, “What, do you feel like we’re competing for the dick or something or do you just believe that guys don’t have any business encroaching on your territory?”

And she had replied, “Yes.” And that’s all she said.

The worse is having a girlfriend find out about that and even much more worse is their assumption that the whole time you’ve been with them, you’ve been going behind their back and sucking dick or, if you’re able to convince her that you haven’t – and good luck with that one – it’s just automatically assumed that you’re going to since you were doing it… and before you even knew she even existed. And, yes – that also goes for even and merely having a thought about it because most people are of a mind that if you’re thinking about something, you plan on doing whatever you’re thinking about.

There are probably some women reading this and laughing their cute asses off and more so if they’ve ever put a guy through this particular wringer. Then, if having to explain this hasn’t be the cluster fuck to end all cluster fucks, some women pour gas on the fire that’s burning you to a crisp by asking, “What about my feelings?”

Ah, if only you could see the look on my face right now. The thing I’ve asked – and have never gotten what I’d call a sensible answer to is, “What does my liking to suck cock have to do with your feelings?” It has always amazed and baffled me how a conversation about something I actually love doing goes from being about me to being about her… but when you ask them this, wow, the answer – if you get one – is all over the place and gets that much more confusing.

“Why didn’t you mention this when we first met?” Which is a good question and the answer is, um, it’s because I was very sure that if we ever got to talking about this, this is how you were gonna react. Now you’re all kinds of lying bastards but if you happen to be proactive and let your cock sucking experiences be known right up front, well, y’all remember that line from “A Few Good Men,” right? If you tell them the truth, you’re hosed and if you leave this out – and because, again, you’re very sure she’s not gonna react well, you’re still hosed – damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

It is amazingly refreshing to have this conversation with a woman and her response is, “That’s so cool!” or they’re not feeling threatened by it.

My “favorite” female response? “You trying to tell me that you don’t like the way I suck your dick?”

Wait… what? Help me out here… how does my liking to suck cock even remotely resembles or becomes a matter of not liking the way you suck me? And, again, you should see the look on my face right about now because just thinking about this invokes an automatic physical response on my part. I’ve heard this one go from the original question to a declaration that, obviously, I like the way guys suck me more than I like how she does it… which for me, personally, ain’t even close to the truth. The real truth is, yes, I just love having my dick sucked and, no, I’m not particular about who does it. I do, in fact, very much appreciate that anyone would want to go down on me and I am always grateful when someone does. Does it matter how it turns out? No, not really but, sure, if I can cum like that, that ramps up my appreciation levels even more because I understand that you didn’t have to do this for me at all.

And even when I’ve explained it as I just did, you wanna guess how some women react to it? Yeah… it’s like I never said a word at all because this is still about her and her feelings and this mysterious dislike of her oral skills.

If having to explain this has taught me anything, it’s taught me that logic never stands a chance against an emotional reaction. I’ve found that you can, in fact, ask a woman if she understands what you’ve explained and, most of the time, her answer is, “Yeah, but…” and what follows the “but” should be a warning to hold onto something. Sometimes, a woman will say that she doesn’t understand it and I’ve never figured out why she doesn’t… or, perhaps, the truth is that she doesn’t want to understand it which begs this question: Why did you ask me a question you didn’t really wanna hear the answer to?

There was a time where having this conversation would seriously raise my blood pressure and just frustrate the shit out of me but I eventually learned to just answer the questions and just leave it at that. I’m kinda good with words and I figure that if I wind up breaking it all down into “baby talk” and a woman still doesn’t understand it, there’s no point in me getting all bent out of shape about it.

But sometimes, it’s just funny, not because such a conversation lacks seriousness, mind you; it’s just that sometimes it’s better to look for and see the humor in such a conversation rather than to get mentally and physically upset about it.

Ah, but it gets better when the person you’re trying to explain this to is male. You tell a guy this and, at some point, he’s gonna ask you if you’re gay or say that you don’t look like the type; maybe he’ll launch into a monologue that’s homophobic, state emphatically that he’d never do some shit like that and, invariably, will also emphatically state that you’d better not ask to suck his dick.

I’ve listened to guys go through this and, once, the guy’s monologue pissed me off, not because of anything he said about me but how ignorantly and unintelligent his speech was and once he was done ranting and raving, I looked at him and said, “Don’t flatter yourself, dude; I wouldn’t want to suck your dick even if I needed to in order to save my life…”

Oooh. He didn’t like that one bit… and I didn’t give a fuck that he didn’t like what I said. But I did ask him, “What makes you think that my liking to suck dick has anything to do with you? You asked me a question and I answered it… and now you’re all offended and shit and maybe you just forgot that I once told you to never ask me a question you didn’t want to hear the answer to – and you just did so fuck you, too.”

What really gets me are those guys who will go ballistic over this… and it’s really all an act because, um, they know a little something-something about cock sucking and personally so. My all time favorite “confrontation” was with a guy who went through the expected monologue and anticipated “You’d better not even think about asking me” ultimatum and when I said that I wouldn’t ask him even if his life depended on it, that’s when he really got pissed off.

So I asked him, “Okay… would you like for me to blow you?”

He said, “No – I don’t believe in that… I’m just offended that you wouldn’t ask me.”

“I just did… so does that mean you’re no longer offended?”

“Yes… um, no… uh, I still don’t believe in that,” he said.

Go figure. Would I have done him if he had consented? Yeah, I would have… and because I sensed it would really fuck with him and, to be honestly, I wouldn’t have been surprised if he had consented because it’s not like I’ve never had this conversation with a guy, heard his objections and the ultimatum… and then he gets around to asking if we can do that thing he previously didn’t believe in doing.

 
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Posted by on 15 February 2019 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Next, What to Do?

So you’ve gotten past your “Oh, shit!” moment and have realized that the only thing that’s really changed about yourself is your thoughts about sex and sexuality although, admittedly, there still may be some “issues” still running around between your ears.  Perhaps you’ve decided that there’s nothing you can – or want to – do about this but maybe this has been on your mind enough and you’ve been thinking about what you’d like to do about this, you know, if you could.

Another of those “way back in the day” moments.  When two guys decided they wanted to “do it to each other,” it was accepted that “it” was pretty much doing everything, from playing with each other’s dick, to sucking each other’s dick, to dicks going in each other’s butt or, at the very least, dicks going between butt cheeks… then repeat if necessary or possible.

I’d have to say that guys then didn’t have much in the way of preferences other than wanting to do it and it wasn’t like guys were in the habit of asking what one liked (or being asked); again, “doing it” was a package deal so if there was a question to be asked and answered, it was usually, “Where can we do this?”  “What” was the whole nine yards; “why” was kinda self-evident; “when” was usually right this moment (but dependent upon the answer to “where”).

Experiences and time would eventually start to shake things out into “I like this” and “I don’t like that” which also included that, “Put it in my butt – but don’t stick it in too far” and the “I’ll suck your dick – but don’t shoot in my mouth” things that would crop up from time to time.

No Internet and the only form of porn were paperback books so if one was clever enough to swipe their father’s stash (or their mom’s stash), the only visualization of the sexual acts you were reading was whatever your mind could conjure up; other than word of mouth, there wasn’t much in the way of helpful information other than knowing what guys liked to do it and what guys didn’t or were too afraid to give it a shot.

There was almost always – and usually – that one moment when one boy would look at another boy and ask, “Have you ever done it with another boy?”  If the answer was yes, the next question would usually be, “Do you wanna do it?” and if the answer was no, um, the same question would be asked – and the answer could still be no… but sometimes it could be, “I don’t know…”

One might not have had any specific preferences when it came to doing it outside of wanting to do it out of that combination of raging hormones and the thrill of doing something that we all knew we weren’t supposed to be doing.

Today, guys have the “advantage” of being able to determine and decide what things they’d want to do once they get past that “Oh, shit!” moment – and thanks to the wealth of information the Internet can make available as well as an understanding of what gay men do when they do it to each other –  and deciding that doing just might be a good idea… but what to do?

And a lot of guys ask this question, believe it or not; it’s one thing to know what two guys could do to, for, and with each other, something else to figure out which of those things will turn out to be just what the doctor ordered.  It’s one thing to know that guys suck each other’s dick, another to imagine one’s self doing it and the same goes for having anal sex and even jerking each other off.

Guys ask this question of me and I’ve answered their question with a question:  What would you want to do?  Some guys would ask this question and it’s a rhetorical one – they already know what they wanna do but the question is more of a… confirmation of sorts so a conversation about what can be done begins and at a basic level:  Mutual masturbation, oral sex, anal sex, all of the above, any combination of those things which could also include kissing and cuddling (or not).

Guys today are able to sort out their preferences before they ever do it for the first time; they’ve already decided that they’re going to be a top (the guy in the male-dominant sexual role) or a bottom (the guy in the female-submissive sexual role) and, yeah, sometimes, a guy will start out wanting to be in both roles and as he feels in the moment.

What gets… amusing is that some guys do, in fact, have an idea of what they want to experience… but will still ask what it’s like to do it, oh, like sucking dick, for example.  Now, you’d think this would be a no-brainer and more so for any guy who’d ever had his dick sucked by a woman and for some guys it is a no-brainer – just not for every guy.  Having your cock sucked is one thing… being the one doing the sucking a whole different thing and, of course, there’s the whole matter of what to do when the guy cums – swallow it, wear it, avoid it at all costs and by any means necessary.

Guys are well-versed about fucking coochie and you’d think that there wouldn’t be much of a disconnect about sticking their dick in a guy’s ass – and more so if they’d ever had anal sex with a women – but, again, there’s this perceived difference but the main thing about this is a sense of revulsion because, well, we know what that orifice’s main purpose is, don’t we?  On the receiving end of the high hard one, again, we see that knowing that guys get boned as being one thing… wholly different when you’re the one with the hankering to get boned because the other thing we know, even via word of mouth, is that, um, it can hurt going in.

True enough, some guys prepare themselves for this moment by using toys, from butt plugs to dildos to prostate stimulators and while this is all well and good, most guys find that while using toys can get them used to being penetrated, having the real thing in their butt is rather different; it’s one thing to do this to yourself, another when you’re not really in control of that moment and there’s a very horny guy on the other end of the dick that’s about to meet your acquaintance.

So we see that when it comes to deciding what to do, there are choices… but choices that aren’t always easy to make because along with all the things two guys can do, there’s also a laundry list of reasons why guys shouldn’t do any of them.  One major one is, “What if someone finds out I (add an M2M thing here)?”  Yes, there’s the whole “What if I catch something?” thing to consider but it’s nothing a case of condoms can’t take care of.

Guys find that it’s easy to sit back and think about all of this but to get to the point where one does those things they’ve been pondering just might provide some added “stress” to the list of things to stress about in this, up to and including wondering, even here in the 21st century, if doing whatever they’re thinking about is going to make them gay.

Yeah, guys back in the 1960s were worried about this, too, so that hasn’t changed a whole lot.  Sometimes I think that guys looking and/or waiting for their first experience tends to suffer from an informational overload – just too much information to process but it is important for a guy to process all of that information and to the best of their ability because one thing they may discover is that the best thing for them to do is…

Nothing.  Certainly, there are a lot of reasons for a guy not to give into the great urge to get out there and do something about what they’re thinking and feeling but it just doesn’t pay to dive in there without thinking things through and beginning with being able to imagine themselves all up into whatever they wanted to experience.

Which is a kind of lead-in to the next thing I’ll scribble about – and you’ll know it when you see it…

 
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Posted by on 7 December 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts and Top Searches: Coincidence?

I dunno… maybe it’s just me, but there seems to be an increase in the interest in blow jobs, from the bi guy forum to my old friend, Top Searches, which still has a question about bro jobs hanging out on my dashboard and my post, “Asking for a Bro-Job” continues to be the most read scribble.  Even my protege, Cityman, said something to me about a surge in the number of guys hitting him up and offering (and asking for) head.

Makes me wonder if there’s something about this time of year that could be responsible.  Cityman opined that maybe it’s the holidays and dudes are just lonelier than, say, back in the summer.  I opined that in much of the country, winter is making itself felt – the weather’s getting colder and nastier in some places and maybe guys aren’t of a mind to be out on the prowl so much when it’s colder than a witch’s tit – so staying and, um, entertaining themselves via some mutual cock sucking is better than running around all over the place and looking to do the same thing – bad enough one has to go out in the cold to go to work and handle other necessary business.

Brrr.

Cityman had asked, rhetorically, what’s up with all the guys wanting to suck cock “all of a sudden” and I reminded him that cock sucking is still like the number one M2M thing to do and as I’ve said here time and time again, it’s high on the list because it doesn’t take a whole lot of time, doesn’t require any special preparation before the fact, can be done almost anywhere… and, oh, yeah, it feels pretty damned good giving and/or receiving.

That and there are plenty of bi guys who’d rather not fuck or be fucked.

When Cityman and I talk blow jobs, it’s rarely about technique; nah, we tend to get into the guts of it (definitely no pun intended), like what’s so appealing about it, whether or not cock sucking “should be” a required skill all bi men should learn – stuff like that.  We debate whether or not technique is all a guy needs or it’s having that desire, that love of participating in some oral satisfaction, that has the most meaning… or a combination of both things.  We get into that whole oral fixation thing and how odd it is that a guy will want to experience this, be justifiably scared shitless to do it – but then gives it a shot and now they kinda get hooked on it.

We discuss the social aspects and once got into an interesting conversation about how guys sucking each other off more often can go a long way to resolving population issues and even how going down on each other could take some of the pressure off of women to do it.

The guys on the forum get all into what size cock they like to suck and some share what it’s like for them to suck a dick, good information for all those guys still sitting on the bench and waiting for their chance to find out what all the hype is about sucking cock.

One of the things Cityman and I talk about often is why there are some guys who just won’t suck a dick; such conversations tend to get a bit involved because there’s no simple answer to the question, which can range from “I tried it and didn’t like it” to guys being very worried about their masculinity since, you know, sucking dick is such a “girly” thing to do.

Like I’ve been saying, if you think women are funny about such things, guys are even funnier and as evidenced by the number of guys who love to suck cock… but would prefer not to have theirs sucked and how this… behavior seems to be prevalent in guys who are bottoms.  One of the reasons behind that that I know about is some guys know that if they get their dick sucked and made to cum, they’re gonna be taken out of the game and now might not be in the mood to do any sucking themselves.  Another is that some guys cum pretty quickly when there’s a dude blowing them and, well, that’s pretty embarrassing so, sure, the best way to avoid that is to tell homey to keep his mouth off the dick, please and thank you.

Some guys have said that having their dick sucked doesn’t turn them on or doesn’t do anything for them and, as such, they’re of a mind that it’s always better to give than receive.  I know what such fellows say about this and I can accept what they have to say… doesn’t mean I really understand this other than for the reasons mentioned in the above paragraph and maybe even how some bottoms are really into being “submissive” and, I guess, in their minds, they’re the ones who do all of the cock sucking and it’s never a question about reciprocation for them.

So… it’s the holiday season, getting cold and stormy in many parts of the country… and guys seem to want to wile away the winter doldrums by getting into some heavy cock sucking.

Coincidence?  I dunno… it is kinda curious, though.

 
 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: I Tried to Resist, But…

…I couldn’t, not when I saw on my Dashboard, “how to know when a guy wants a brojob.”

Still, it’s a legit question and the only thing I can point back to was the many times I’ve seen guys doing everything they could to get the hint across that, um, you know, if we were to, uh, suck each other’s cock, er, ah, I wouldn’t mind and I sure won’t tell anyone that we did this.  Lemme see if I can (once again) dissect this.

Are there any external signs that a guy might want a bro job?  Other than sneaking peeks at his crotch to see if he’s hard or not, you’d have to be knowledgeable in the art of reading body language and being able to listen to how a guy is saying something and not necessarily what he’s saying although that can be a clue as well.  While these things are and can be rather telling, before one puts such a suggestion on the table, one must remember that what you see or hear isn’t always what’s really going on.

Some of trying to figure this out depends on the situation at hand – what are the two guys doing and/or talking about?  See, back in the day, it wasn’t unusual for guys to get together to just hang out and gossip – yes, women aren’t the only ones who do this.  Now it’s a matter of whether or not the conversation migrates to things sexual or not and, at least in my experiences, it wasn’t ever a question of if a conversation would make that turn but when it would.

For me, that’s when things got to be rather funny.  If you’re paying attention to the other guy, again, his body language and a certain change in the pattern of his speech can, at the least, tell you that he’s horny and wants to do something about it.  Some guys fidget – they can’t seem to sit still and I’ve heard some guys say, out of the blue and totally unrelated to the conversation of the moment, “Man, I wouldn’t mind getting my dick sucked right about now!”

What you don’t know is whether he’s actually hinting that the two of you should do this or he’s really thinking about how he can convince a woman to suck his dick.  Likewise, I’ve been in conversations where a guy will, again, out of the blue and totally disconnected from, say, talking about football, “What would you do if some dude asked if he could suck your dick?”

Some guys are just fucking hilarious when trying to drop hints and just as funny are the guys who sense where this conversation is going… but are on the fence about whether they should offer up their own thoughts on whatever funny question was asked.  For me, sheesh, such conversations and these hilarious twists would be… annoying; I’d be talking to a guy, the conversation gets “sexy,” and he’s dropping hints all over the place and as he does so, I’m thinking to myself, “Why don’t you just come out and tell me what you wanna do?  Jeez!”

So when a guy dropped the “I wouldn’t mind getting my dick sucked” thing, I’d just ask them, “What’s on your mind about it?” or sometimes I’d even say, “Yeah, that would work for me, too!” – and then watch them – again, their body language can be quite telling if you know what to look for.

To the question of, “What would you do if…?” I’d often take a moment to think about the guy I’m talking to and what I already know about him before answering in one of two ways:  If a guy wanted to suck my dick, sure, I’d let him do it or, if I’m pretty sure or have a good sense that this answer would, ah, offend him, I’d backpedal and answer with, “I don’t know what I’d do…”  And many times, I’ve learned that what I thought I knew about a guy wasn’t all there was to be learned about him, i.e., he’s usually pretty vocal and against guys doing it to other guys… but, secretly, he’s either done it before or is now looking to take the plunge.

Then, with either response, I’d watch his body language and if he appears to be disappointed or even “encouraged,” well, he could be suggesting that the two of us whip out our dicks and work toward making them very soft again.

Once, a guy was tap-dancing all around the place and it actually got on my nerves enough for me to say to him, “Why don’t you just ask me what you want to ask me and stop dancing around all over the place?”  Sometimes, one can be intuitive enough to sense a change in the mood and pick up on the fact that whatever machinations the other guy is going through really means that if you were to agree, it would be nice for us to suck on each other’s dick until we both cum.

And I won’t tell if you won’t.

You just know this is what he wants to ask and do should you be of a mind to agree – and now it’s just a matter of whether or not he’s gonna be brave enough to just put it out there.

Some guys disguise their, ah, desire for this with roughhousing; if a guy “suddenly” suggests that we should wrestle or otherwise initiates some light roughhousing, well, that could be a rather physical hint that he just might want some more, um, personal body to body contact.  The thing that always struck me as being hilarious was that most of the guys I hung out with knew I had a black belt in judo and they’d still want to wrestle and now for me it was a matter of being observant enough to be able to feel his erection as we tussled.  Or, like one guys did during one roughhouse session, um, he planted his face in my crotch and lightly gnawed on me; on the surface – and if you had been watching this, it looked like he was trying to distract me as I had applied a light arm lock, you know, to “shock” me into releasing the arm lock (not that I was really gonna hurt his arm).

I felt the… nibbles and just said to him, “If that’s what you want to do, ya might want to unzip me first – pretty sure my pants don’t taste all that good…”

His response?  “You’ll have to let go of my arm first…”

On the whole, there’s really no sure, definitive way to know if a guy wants to get into a bro job unless he either does or say something that leaves no doubt in your mind that this is what he really wants to do.  Again, sometimes what he says can be an indication and more so if he’s asking or talking about something that’s unrelated to whatever preceded this change in the conversation.  If a guy seems to be down in the mouth about something – girl problems, some shit going on with his job or even the frustration over not being able to get a job – and a few other things, it’s just kinda strange that when guys get stressed to a certain degree, sex just seems to be the right thing to relieve that stress and, sure, if some intoxicants are involved, well, there’s no telling what his lowered inhibitions are going to reveal.

Sure, if you sense that things are heading in this direction, you could just simply ask him, “Why are we talking about this?” or even “What is it that you really want to do?” while keeping in mind that he might be “offended” and start backpedaling.  Guys talk to each other about sex even if in rather general terms and a general sort of way; doesn’t mean he’s fishing for a bro job… and it could mean that he is and now it’s up to you to figure out what’s really on his mind and short of asking him directly, there’s still no dyed-in-the-wool to know or tell that he’s interested in a bro job unless, of course, he’s bold and daring enough to come right out and ask you – and some guys won’t because, as everyone knows (or should know), we don’t exactly handle rejection very well.

I’ve had guys ask me how they can ask another guy if they can blow them and without getting punched in the face and I’ve honestly told them that you just get up the nerve to ask them and be ready to deal with however the other guy reacts and even if he reacts badly to such an offer.

And, yes:  I’ve had guys ask me how they can ask another guy if they can suck his dick… and I’ve been the guy they wanted to ask and, yep, I’ve been taken by surprise by such a twist and usually because I just learned something about this guy that I didn’t know.

Guys can be direct and right to the point about wanting to do this… or they can drop hints, tap dance, and other rather funny things trying to get up the nerve and to the point where what they want to do, right here and now, is to get some cock sucking going.  I’ve sat and watched guys go through all of this and stop short of actually putting the suggestion on the table… then, the next time I’ve been hanging with them, they happen to mention that, um, you know, the other day?  I really wanted to suck your dick and was hoping you wouldn’t mind sucking mine…

And the only thing I could say in response was, “Why didn’t you just ask me?”

And that’s really the only way to really know if a guy wants a bro job – just ask him if that’s what he wants to do as well as deciding whether or not you, too, want to do this.

 
 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Oops!

I’m sorry to bring this up again, but, the image of that clip I saw on Tumblr a while ago now where the young guy was sucking dick and got surprised by the other guy cumming popped into my head and while I know it’s not really funny… um, it still gives me the giggles to recall the look of utter surprise on his face and his cheeks doing the chipmunk thing.

One of the reasons why some women will skin you alive if you cum in their mouth is because, as I’ve heard countless times, the “perpetrator” swore on every holy item he could mention that if she does this for him, he’s not gonna cum in her mouth… and then he does just that and, yeah, sometimes a guy can be such an asshole because no matter what he said, he intended to do what he swore he wasn’t gonna do.  Going forward, the “victim” might continue to give a guy head but it ain’t gonna be “a whole lot” and she sure as hell isn’t going to tolerate one of those “I didn’t mean for that to happen” excuses… and even if the guy truly didn’t mean to.

I often think there are some… misconceptions at work here.  One of them is our ability to hold back from cutting loose when getting head and as if our control over this is absolute – it isn’t.  Then there are those guys who will say that while they enjoy being sucked, bleh, they’ve never been able to cum that way – or, perhaps, truthfully, they’ve never been allowed to cum that way.  So they assume that if they’ve never cum being sucked by a woman, it’s not gonna happen with a guy… and both guys can wind up getting surprised and often, sooner than anyone could anticipate.

Another is the assumption that the guy being blown will have the presence of mind to give the promised warning and that can be an iffy moment at best because getting shoved off the cliff can hit a guy faster than his brain can realize it’s about to happen – and there’s no time to blurt out, “I’m gonna cum!”

And, um, oops – sorry about that, man…

And, yeah, there are still those guys who are total assholes and will tell a guy that, hey, if you suck my dick, I promise to let you know when I’m gonna cum so you can stop, okay?  Then, moments later, oops!  Now the cad is “apologizing” for something that he, in fact, meant to do.

As I sat here giggling to myself about that video clip that seems to be stuck in my head, a question popped into my head and along the lines of what, if anything, can a guy do to keep from getting surprised?  The first thing is kinda obvious:  If you’re not planning or wanting to get a mouthful of spunk, um, don’t suck cock – and I’m not even gonna say don’t suck it for a long time because, again, a guy’s “control” can be subverted at any time.

If a guy promises to warn you, take it with a grain of salt because, um, he might not be able to give the warning in enough time and, yeah, if he’s telling you in no uncertain terms that he’s not gonna cum in your mouth, um, don’t believe him and keep it firmly in your head that shit always happens when you don’t want it to.

Are there any “warning signs” that a guy is on the verge of cutting loose?  Yeah, there are… if you’re able to pick up on them and you’re paying attention to how he’s reacting to what you’re doing – and some guys just don’t give off any signs that they’re about to cum; one moment you’re happily sucking on him and the next, oops.  Sometimes the “warning signs” are noticeable, like being able to feel a series of tremors running along his cock and being able to feel the guy’s prick swell to some degree and if he hasn’t issued the warning, you have maybe a second or two to get his dick out of your mouth.

If you keep on hand on his cock and, sometimes, one hand lightly on his belly, you might be able to pick up on those things as well as a big change in his breathing.

Maybe.

Of course, the other thing one can do to avoid a mouthful is to tell the guy – and before anything happens – that you’d prefer him not to unload in your mouth and just in case he’s not gonna be able to keep his word to abide by your wishes, put a condom on him.  Not only is it safer but should his, ah, control not be as good as he thinks it is (or as good as you think it should be) if he goes “oops,” it’ll be in the condom and not assaulting your taste buds with a taste you might not be used to or want to deal with.

And that’s if you can handle the taste of latex; even those flavored condoms can leave a worst taste in your mouth than a load of spunk can.  Some make the mistake of using a condom that’s been pre-lubricated; not only does the lubrication keep the condom from drying out in the package, the lubrication can also contain a spermicide – I wonder if it’s still Nonoxol-9? – and the included spermicide can not only taste horrible but can make one’s mouth and tongue go numb.

Yuck.

Let’s see… what else?  If you have doubts about his ability to not cum and you have reason to believe that he’s getting close, stop sucking him and finish him with your hand – oh, and point the “barrel of the gun” away from you unless you’re not gonna mind getting a facial.  Another kind of funny thing is that some guys actually like to watch the other guy bust a nut and tend to hover over the cock they’re stroking with their hand and waiting for the explosion to happen… and with their mouth open – and usually because they’re also trying to catch their breath.  The guy cums and, oops, now you’re tasting some spunk when that wasn’t on your list of things to do.

Lawd… I can’t get that damned video clip out of my head; I think that guy’s look of utter surprised is burned into my memory.

I’ve talked to guys who’ve gotten that unexpected mouthful and they were beyond being pissed about it and usually because there was no warning and while I can sympathize with them, I’ve asked them, “Well, what did you think was gonna happen?”  Some guys admitted to being surprised, like, the guy cut loose way before he thought he might and I’ve found myself shrugging and telling the pissed off guy, “It happens…” which doesn’t make the “offended” guy feel any better but is still an indication that what you think and what might happen truly aren’t the same things.

One of the things that isn’t exactly an “oops” moment is a guy getting surprised by the amount of spunk they find flowing into their mouth… and some guys can really bring the fabled “huge load.”  Instead of “oops,” that’s more like an “oh, shit” moment to find yourself trying to handle more than you expected and, oops, sometimes swallowing out of self-defense or even as an automatic reaction to find your mouth “overloaded” and spitting it out, well, there’s just no time to do that right away.

But, yeah, even that can make a guy giving head get “that look” on his face and give him chipmunk cheeks.  Yeah, I know – it’s not really funny and more so when one gets caught off guard by the other guy’s happy moment – I just happen to have a wicked sense of humor.

Now, ya might be wondering if I’ve ever been surprised like that… and the answer is sure I have and, yup, I’ve even had guys tell me that they’d warn me, that they weren’t gonna cum, and even that they couldn’t cum like that; otherwise, I never would have learned the lessons that are a part of this and the biggest and most important one is that if you suck a guy’s dick – and, sometimes how long you do it isn’t a factor – if you do it in just the right way, he’s gonna cum in your mouth.  How do you know when you’ve done it in just the right way?  Um, he’s gonna cum in your mouth and, yup, it’s a surprise to both guys.

So you learn to expect it to happen and if it doesn’t, okay.  You fix it in your mind that if/when he cums – and you’re not opposed to him cumming in your mouth – it may be a little or it may be a lot.  It might take him a while to cut loose or, ah, embarrassingly, it could literal take a few seconds.  You do your best to identify the warning signs (and if the guy gives off any) and if you think he’s about to unload on you, just stop sucking him.  There are little tricks you can use to, um, delay the inevitable, like hold him at the base of his cock and applying some pressure – but not a whole lot because that shit hurts, right?  If you want to make him cum – but not in your mouth – use your hand a bit more and cut back the amount of time you have him in your mouth.

The thing is that once a guy reaches that point of no return, nothing you’re gonna do is gonna stop him from exploding; the other thing is that the point of no return isn’t as… consistent as one might expect because not only do you not know when the other guy is going to reach that moment, sometimes he doesn’t know, either; like I said, it can either take him quite a bit of time to cum (and more so if he jerked off before you got together) or it can happen seconds after you get started.

And, oops – chipmunk cheeks and that look of total, utter surprise on your face.  I will say that this situation isn’t really that big of a trust issue that some guys make it out to be; if anything, it’s the giver not really understanding how this whole thing can work and that it often doesn’t work the way one might expect it to so, yeah:  If you suck a guy’s cock in just the right way and in the right moment, what do you think is gonna happen?

And, with all seriousness now, if you don’t want to be surprised and be all chipmunk-y, um, don’t suck dick or do it with him safely covered up.

 
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Posted by on 28 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Being in One of Those Moments

I’m sitting and watching “Station 19;” the new captain is bitching out a woman on his team who has applied to be a lieutenant and he had given her some leadership tasks… and tasks that she failed to do and he said something about the way she was thinking…

And your friend and mine – my brain – asked, “Why is it that some folks believe that bullshit that us bi guys don’t think about what we’re doing?”

Oh, okay… we’re really doing this again, brain?

“We sure are… and while you’re at it, we need to make a dumpster run so grab your coat and I’ll rewind the tape and show you what I’m talking about…”

I don’t remember his name or how we even wound up being together; I don’t even recognize where this memory too place – my brain has edited that information out because it’s not germane to the question asked.

We’re both naked and I can tell that he’s nervous – this is only like his third or fourth time doing this and his body language is conflicting because he’s nervous yet his cock is showing no signs of being nervous. Indeed, he’s so nervous I can smell it, a somewhat sour kind of scent that’s not wholly unpleasant. He’s telling me something – I can see his mouth forming words but can’t hear what he’s saying.

“It’s not important what he’s saying,” my brain says, trying to sneakily ease its “finger” off the mute button. “This ain’t about him – it’s about you so pay attention, okay?”

I said something and he smiles nervously before stretching out on the bed and I follow, feeling my thoughts shifting into operating mode but I’m not really thinking about anything outside of wondering what he’s gonna taste and feel like in my mouth.

“Fast forwarding,” my brain says and now I’m well into sucking his dick and most of my senses are working at 110%; his scent has changed – it’s no longer a little sour because he’s gotten over his nervousness. With one hand on his belly, I can tell his body temp is up, as is his heart rate and breathing and, oh, yeah, his cock tastes and feels wonderful in my mouth and I’m trying to decide if I want to prolong making him cum or “kill him quickly…” and then let him live just enough so he can return the favor… or even if wanna be bothered with that… or swallow his jizz and keep going until he’s good and hard again.

That’s for later consideration; for now, he’s gently thrusting into my mouth and even though my brain has muted his moans and curses, I can feel the vibrations in his body and just when I’m about to really get into the zone, my brain says, “You know we’ve got that meeting tomorrow at 9:30, don’t you?”

“Oh, and when you get done with this guy, don’t forget you’re supposed to go get the oil changed.”

“What’s for dinner? Are you cooking or do you wanna order out?”

“He tastes a little salty and I’m reminding you to get your lab work done…”

“What else do we have to do later?”

And this sudden influx of seemingly random thoughts stops me dead in mid-suck, my tongue kinda waving around his cock knob as I ask my brain, “Of all the times to bring this shit up, you had to do it now?”

“Sure; just because you’re having fun blowing this guy doesn’t mean I’m supposed to just shit down… and that remind me – we’re getting low on coffee and creamer.”

I blink and return to the moment and, oops, he’s spilling his seed into my mouth and it does taste as good as I suspected it would… but even as I swallow, I’m back to thinking about those few seconds where my brain decided to do it’s job and think, remind me of stuff, and keeping track of the guy who’s been writhing under my oral assault and did, in fact, record the moments before his back arched and he pushed a little more of himself into my mouth just before that first spurt was fired.

Just as it made note of how long it took for him to cum – just over six minutes; total time I was “distracted” by the other things in my head? Felt like twenty minutes – was really only a few seconds and, as always, one of those things was that damned cricket that lives in my head reminding me that I should have done this, shouldn’t have loved doing it, and I sure as hell shouldn’t be getting situated so he can do what’s he’s doing now.

“Which, by the way, does feel good,” my brain chimes in. “Now, while he’s having fun working to get you off, let’s go over what we have to do for the rest of the week…”

While my brain is forcing me to go over my to do list, The Cricket is pissed beyond being pissed… because this guy is really giving my dick a good working over. The Cricket is protesting mightily, that other part of my mind is droning on and on about what has to be done next month, and that part of me that is always paying attention to everything is letting me know that in about, oh, another few minutes, he’s gonna make you cum – so what do you wanna do after that?

Do you call it quits or do we have time for another round of this?

Let me finish busting my nut and I’ll get back to you…

Lots of white noise blankets out all thought… the the signal is reacquainted and the brain is both rejoicing over my ejaculatory moment, The Cricket is having a stroke and a grand mal seizure, and then”appointment secretary in my head had determined that if he wants to go again and, um his renewed erection seems to indicate that he does, well, we have some time before I gotta go get the oil changed.”

Total time immersed in this memory? About five minutes – the time it took me to get the big trash can, trundle it to the dumpster, empty it, and return home.

And, no – it’s not true that we don’t think and/or are mindless about doing this, that we’re not aware of the implications and the probable consequences… but if you were to ask what I was thinking about as this guy and I sucked each other off twice, my answer just might have been, “Nothing…” not because I wasn’t thinking but because what I was thinking about was just too much to verbalize and most of it didn’t have anything to do with what the two of us was doing that day.

And even as I went through this memory, that damned cricket had something to say – again… and just as I did that day, I ignored it, not because it’s being a mental pain in my ass but because it’s not telling me anything it hasn’t told me many times…

 
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Posted by on 26 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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