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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: To Swallow or not To Swallow…

Cityman and I were having a discussion about this and one of the things I love about talking to him is that sometimes he brings up topics of discussion that make me sit back and think about things and in ways I’ve either not thought of or haven’t thought about since Hector was a puppy.

Like, in the M2M world of sex, sucking cock is a seemingly mandatory skill a guy must learn and master and it is assumed that all guys who get with guys suck cock… but not all guys do.  Likewise, it is assumed that all male cock suckers swallow, er, the fruits of their labor… and the truth is nah, not all guys are of a mind to swallow it or even allow it in their mouth.  It’s known that some men turn to other men for blow jobs, not because they have (or run into) a woman who won’t blow them but because they’re not of a mind to finish him this way – but it’s also known that guys who suck cock do finish the job.

When guys are negotiating a hookup, two questions that are almost always asked are, “Do you give head?” and “Do you swallow?” and the answers usually determine how the rest of the negotiation goes; answer yes to both and the conversation continues; answer no to one or both and the conversation can come to a screeching halt.  But, thinking about the guys who do swallow, well, um, why do it at all?  Some guys do it because it’s expected while some guys do it simply because it gives them one hell of a rush to do so as well as a sense of it being their “reward” for whatever effort they put out in order to get him to bust that nut.  Having said that, some guys won’t allow sperm to enter their mouth because they’ve never acquired the taste and some fear catching something if the other dude cuts loose in their mouth.  Something about this last thing, like, since a lot of guys give and receive head without using a condom, the moment mouth meets bare dick, the risk is assumed at that moment and not just when the other guy cums.  The CDC says there’s a four percent chance of catching something via oral sex but you’re likely to have a problem if you have advanced gum disease, cuts or abrasions in your mouth, unfilled cavities, or all of the above; otherwise, the chemistry of the saliva in your mouth not only keeps your mouth and gums from drying out but starts the process of digesting whatever you’ve put into your mouth via some powerful enzymes… and whatever your saliva doesn’t outright destroy, the hydrochloric acid in your stomach will most certainly do the job.

Okay, just had to toss that one in, you know, just in case ya didn’t know this.

Some guys admit to feeling “girly” if a guy cums in their mouth and, indeed, some guys feel, think, or otherwise believe that if they suck a cock – but the guy doesn’t cum in their mouth, it’s not a gay thing to do… and if you’re reading this and rolling your eyes, join the club and be a member in good standing of the Association of Eye Rollers.  It’s not that I’ve never heard this one before so I’ve often wondered why a guy can feel this way and I think that a lot of it has to do with the perception that sucking cock (with or without swallowing) is a woman’s thing to do so if you’re a guy doing it, yup, it’s girly.  I’ve also thought that porn sends some pretty bad messages about sucking cock and getting creamed tonsils and thanks to their infamous money shot; you see guys getting blown then they take the dick away and jerk themselves off to either give a facial, spray it all over the place or to deposit the goo onto a waiting tongue.  But one of the things you can see is how the person giving the blow job has this… eager, excited and anticipatory look on their face as they await that first shot of spunk to come their way, like it’s the most orgasmically exciting thing ever.  In straight porn, you see women in this position and upon getting a face full, oh, they look so happy and, I’ll say, submissively eager as they await that first shot and in gay porn, you can see that very same behavior being portrayed and I don’t know about anyone else but it reeks of submissive behavior and we tend to associate submissive behavior as being girly.  As an aside, oh, man, do I ever love seeing those women who know they’re supposed to take it in the face and you can tell by the look on their face that they’re not feeling this part of the scene at all – they’d rather undergo a root canal without any anesthetic.

The usual caveat:  I am not even trying to insult any women by saying this so, ladies, put the straight razors away.

Cityman had asked me if I was afraid to swallow the first time and I admitted that I wasn’t as much afraid as I was surprised by “suddenly” feeling something warm and gooey squirting into my mouth and I swallowed it purely out of reflex – it was either that or gag on it and I even said that it never occurred to me to spit it out.  Still, I didn’t find the taste objectionable – I thought it tasted pretty good.  Going forward, if a guy was shooting it, I was swallowing it although I pointed out there were times when a guy would put more into my mouth than I could immediately handle and, oops, some of it got away but that just made me determined to not miss any.  Nine times out of ten, if I suck a guy’s dick and he cums, I’m gonna swallow it and that one time represents situations where I’ve discovered it’s not gonna taste good or I just want to see him lose his load.  That “I wanna give you a facial!” shit is a guaranteed way to get hurt…  I even told Cityman that swallowing gets rid of the evidence and there’s no mess to clean up.

Proper blow job etiquette says that you don’t have to swallow it; if you get it in your mouth, you can spit it out and, really, you don’t have to let him do it in your mouth at all if you don’t want to… but people who swallow (even if they spit it out later) are more prized than those who refuse to swallow.  The whole thing could very well and “simply” be a guy thing; ejaculating into a space feels better than doing it outside of a space, as in when we masturbate – it feels good to cum but it just feels better when we do in a mouth, pussy, or even a butt, a fake vagina/mouth or something like a Fleshlight – sorry, it’s just the way we’re wired.

The discussion kinda went in a slightly different direction but still rather relevant:  Is cock sucking really a submissive thing to do?  Some of the guys on the bi guy forum say that it makes them feel very submissive to blow a guy and take his cum while others say that the other guy just thinks he’s being dominant in this and, as such, he’s in charge of what’s happening because the guy doing the sucking is being dominant by making homey give up the nut – taking it away from him as opposed to “submissively” waiting for him to give it up.  I recall a guy saying that he really didn’t like getting a mouthful of spunk… but he did love being made to take it and swallow it; sounds kinda weird but it does play into how some very masculine men can love feeling very “girly” and submissive when when having sex with another guy.

Some guys say they feel very damned naughty when they swallow; since they’re not supposed to be sucking a dude’s dick in the first place, swallowing his seed just adds to the rush of thumbing their nose at the ancient taboo.  What I know is guys swallow more often than they don’t whether it’s out of obligation, an expectation, or they just don’t feel that the job is complete until the spunk has been consumed.  Again, I point to something I’ve heard a lot of guys say, that being, where some women are loathe to do any swallowing, there are guys who specifically swallow and because it’s known that some women ain’t fans of doing it.  Some say by partaking of each other’s seed, it creates a bond between us that’s pretty special… but I’ve also heard some more darker thoughts expressed by some guys, like it makes the feel dominant and powerful to make a guy submit to sucking his cock and by getting a mouthful of spunk, it emasculates the guy getting his tonsils creamed.  And while some guys do feel “girly,” there are guys who don’t feel anything but great satisfaction when emptying someone’s balls.

One of the ongoing arguments about blow jobs are those guys who’d rather eat shit and die before they’d suck a dude’s dick… but they are quick to feed a guy his dick and cum and if they aren’t of a mind to do either thing, well, they’re just a punk-assed bitch for not being man enough to suck the dick and eat the spunk.  True, a lot of guys are leery about doing some swallowing – what will it taste like?  Again and again, it’s true that it’s an acquired taste and that it’s just not the taste alone that must be acquired; consistency and volume are part of the acquiring the taste thing as well.

To swallow or not to swallow… that is the question.  The answer is you don’t have to if you don’t want to – the other guy might be disappointed.

 
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Posted by on 6 June 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: The Debate Continues

As the title indicates, the discussion about bro-jobs is heating up and it’s sliding in the direction of how they don’t happen.  Now, this discussion might seem out-of-place among bisexual and bi-curious guys because one could think that if homey is bi or curios, if a bro-job opportunity came along, at least one guy wouldn’t have any objections; indeed, some guys have said that if their bro asked for one, that works and more so for the guys who are still looking for someone they can have oral sex with for the first time.

I’ve allowed that it makes sense that if a bro-job is needed to cement a bond, as an act of compassion, or just to keep a friend from having a painful case of blue balls, let it happen and have fun… except it’s not that easy because as much as a dude might want to offer/accept a bro-job, his image becomes an all-important factor.  There are, no doubt, guys who wouldn’t object to a bro-job except there’s the whole “Is it gay?” thing to contend with and that alone is enough to stop a bro-job from ever happening and it’s the same thing that also happens to keep guys eager to take the plunge sitting on the side of the pool and comes in the form of a question (and is tacked onto the question of being gay):

“What if someone finds out that I did this?”

It’s not as if this isn’t a legitimate concern for some guys but for the most part, it’s a paranoid one that will make most guys overlook something, namely, there are only two ways someone is gonna find out that you and your bro sucked each other’s dick and that’s if you happen to get caught doing it or one of you tells someone else.  Otherwise, how would anyone know that this went down?  Now, some guys throw it down and are worried about it being found out and that can affect their behavior to the point where someone can look at them and tell that something ain’t quite right with them and could generate a question like, “Dude, are you okay?  Ya look like something’s bothering you!”  It’s not like a guy facing this question is gonna answer it honestly; it’ll be like, “Yeah, I’m good – I was just thinking about something but it’s no big deal…” and then hope that the inquirer doesn’t press the issue.

Add on to this the original question:  “Is it gay?”  Well, um, yeah, the act itself between men is related to homosexual sexual behavior but also true is that not all men who suck cock (or are sucked by men) are gay… but you can see the direction one’s thoughts can move in.  I have seen guys dance all around this question by saying things like, “Well, if we do it but we don’t cum in each other’s mouth, then it’s not gay!”  If you think this sounds cock-eyed, just remember I’ve told you that if you think women are funny about things sexual, guys can be even funnier.  But while the two guys contemplating a bro-job can convince themselves that it’s true (and it isn’t by current definitions), another thing that gets thought can make sure that the hypothetical bro-job never happens, namely (and loosely), will the other guy think I’m gay because I wanna do this?

And this is despite both guys saying right up front, “You know I’m not gay, right?” and the “typical” response is usually along the lines of, “Yeah, but…” right along with, “Neither am I!” and the “but” is kinda implied.  But a guy caught between having this need taken care of and considering the impact on his self-image, will usually lean toward protecting his self-image.  Again, the logic of the situation can make perfectly good sense… but the emotional things will almost always trump and defeat logic.  Some guys are just very much afraid that exchanging blow jobs with any guy is gonna make them instantly gay – and this doesn’t include all those guys out there who think such an act is an abomination to begin with and they’re not included in this scribble simply because we know they’re out there.

One of the things about this is not only what goes through a guy’s mind if/when this situation appears, but the amount of stuff they’re thinking about in a relatively short period of time.  Because these things tend to happen spontaneously, guys find themselves faced with a decision:  Yea or dude, you can’t be serious!  And in the space of time it takes them to accept or reject, they’ve thought about all the implications I’ve mentioned and many more that I haven’t even said anything about and I’m talking about fractions of seconds.  Now the thought process can be extended into minutes because few guys are gonna come right out and ask for a bro-job; like I said before, they’re gonna tap dance all around asking the important question by dropping a lot of hints and beginning with, “Man, I wouldn’t mind getting my dick sucked right about now!”  On the surface, it could be just wishful thinking… and it could be the opening statement that, hopefully, will get this thing to jump off.  During such discourse, both guys are weighing the pros and cons something fierce; the need is there but is the need greater than the implications?

I’ve been in those moments and have sat and watched guys think this through and it’s both fascinating to watch as much as it can be pretty funny as human nature wars with social programming; I’ve seen guy decide that while it would be nice, it’s not worth being worried about someone finding out or confusing him about his sexuality – and keep in mind that this is them thinking about asking me about this and not me asking them.  Depending on a guy’s emotional state at the time and as well as his current state of sobriety, there’s really no telling what he’s gonna say; even if he were to launch into a “hypothetical” situation, all that really means is that he’s still weighing the pros and cons and requires more input, like – and this is an actual thing I’ve heard – “What would you do if someone asked you to suck their dick?” or “If some dude wanted to blow you, would you let him do it?”  Depending who I’m talking to – and this is an important consideration – I may or may not answer either of the questions… but with certain guys, I’m not beyond fucking with them by saying something like, “I dunno… maybe – it depends.  What would you do?”

Sometimes the matter is dropped because my response – or lack of one – isn’t the one they were expecting and now the prospect is deemed to be too much of a hassle because the other consideration that goes through a guy’s mind is, simply, if we do this, what’s gonna happen to our friendship?  I’ve come across guys who found themselves in a bro-job moment with someone else, they said thanks but no thanks, and the friendship got shut down permanently because their sensibilities were greatly offended.  So while bro-jobs do happen – some guys just decide to go for it and worry about any fallout later – a lot of times, they just don’t happen and while there may be those who feel that if it needs to be done, just do it, this isn’t even as easy as it may appear to be – always keep in mind that guys are more worried about their image than they are anything else.  I’ve heard guys say that they were tempted to go for it… but they didn’t; some actually voiced some regret over not doing it but once the moment has passed, there’s usually no going back to it unless in the rare occasion situation that the other guy has, in the intervening time, decided that giving it a shot isn’t going to fuck things up.

Is this really a sexuality issue?  Depends on the guys involved at that moment but bro-jobs are reportedly between straight men whose sexuality isn’t in question and because this demographic segment is being highlighted, sure, questioning the sexuality of any straight guy willing to get into this seems to be appropriate because, as Oceanswater said in some of her comments yesterday, if a guy is willing to do this, he must be into guys – so why not just admit it and do what you gotta do?  This does, in fact, make sense… except a bro-job can happen and there’s no being into guys anywhere in the picture; it’s just guys being opportunistic if nothing else.  Things have to line up at the right time and in the right way as well as with the right person.  I don’t know how many times I’ve been totally surprised by guys putting a bro-job offer out there; you think you know your friends and know them well but something like this?  If homey is buzzed out of his mind at the time, okay, maybe I’m not all that surprised because I do know how booze can play into this… but still!  Who knew home boy could have a couple of drinks and this thing surfaces?  I’ve had guys come right out and say that if we were to do this, it would make them feel so much better (and about whatever’s bothering them)… and in that short space of time I’ve found myself thinking that I had no idea that he’d even consider asking such a question…

Then again, a bro-job is nothing if not a trust issue.  In hypothetical discussions, I’ve allowed that, no, I wouldn’t say you were gay if you “all of a sudden” wanted something like this to happen – and it’s the truth… but I know that you don’t have to be gay to do this.  The trust isn’t about whether or not a good blow job is gonna be given – the trust is all about whether or not this thing can go down and no one else finds out that it did and when they don’t happen, it’s because the trust isn’t there even when the guy you’re talking to about this is a long-time friend.  You’d trust him with your life if the two of you were on the road and he’s driving… but that’s not enough trust to allow a bro-job to happen, purposely or otherwise.  As mentioned and if nothing else, it’s one sure way to find out just how well you think you know someone and you usually discover that you don’t know them as well as you thought you did.

This is such an interesting topic.  Do bro-jobs happen?  Yes, they do.  Are they always between straight guys?  No, they are not.  Is this really a sexuality issue?  No, not always; as described, bro-jobs don’t seem to include the fact that a lot of bi guys, when looking for their first oral experience, often think about their close friends first – it’s better the devil you know than the one you don’t but it’s also true that some guys will automatically exclude their close male friends because scratching that itch isn’t worth losing a good friend over.  That a good friendship could be irrevocably destroyed is usually a damned good reason for a bro-job not to ever happen…

Have a safe and tasty Memorial Day!

 
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Posted by on 27 May 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Bro Job Bullshit

On the bi guy forum, a recent topic is (wait for it) the bro job and I did a quick web search to see if there was any updated stuff out there on this.  I found a couple of articles and scanned them, picking up on the fact that both articles say that this is an act performed between straight men who don’t see themselves as being gay or bisexual.  One article said that a guy said he didn’t see himself as bisexual – despite participating in five bro jobs (at the time of the writing) – because he couldn’t see himself having a relationship with another guy.

Man, my eyes rolled so hard they knocked my glasses askew.  First, being bisexual doesn’t have shit to do with being in a relationship or even wanting to be in one and I just can’t seem to understand why this particular thing keeps coming up in discussions about bisexuality and, mainly, when men are involved.  Then because there’s still some residual angst toward homosexual men – and, it seems, a continued angst against bisexual men – it’s always highlighted that dudes who get into bro jobs make it clear that they’re not gay even though, um, they just did something that most people would consider to be quite gay.

One of the things I see here is a disconnect between the act – cock sucking – and it being gay for two guys to blow each other as well as what it means to be homosexual.  We – society at large – are so funny about this that while it’s not unusual to see stuff like this get sliced and diced to avoid calling a spade a spade (or a rose is still a rose, if you prefer this one), the deciding factor is in the justification or two bros went down on each other for reasons that have nothing to do with sexuality – from being incredibly horny to being under some kind of emotional distress to even being bored out of their minds and not having anything else “productive” to do – and let’s not forget blaming it on the alcohol.

One article I peeped suggests that if the guys don’t kiss, it’s not gay; the same thing is said when a bro job jumps off but ejaculation doesn’t happen in a guy’s mouth or anywhere else on his body.  Indeed, even way back in the day, a lot of dudes would refuse to suck dick because it was too gay for them… but that didn’t stop them from jamming their dick into some guy’s backside… but if they pulled out and shot their load elsewhere, well, no – it’s not gay at all.  The same article says that a bro job is just part of the male bonding experience and that much I can agree with… but then the article gets into some slicing and dicing, i.e., if you’re the one being blown – but not doing any blowing – your sexual identity is apparently intact and unspoiled.  It even suggests that this is a very big deal in certain cultural groups, like Latin American, Afro-American and middle class America.  This plays into the ages old stereotype that Black men are homophobic and Hispanic men are just as homophobic or even more so.

But bro jobs can happen between men and regardless to culture and if there’s something about this “phenomenon” that’s true, it’s just boys being boys and if the boys happen to be bi or gay, well, okay – that can work and, if nothing else, makes this bro job thing a little easier to swallow (don’t even go there, okay?).  Now, there’s been this issue with folks rejecting sexuality labels and it’s pretty fascinating to see men (in particular) doing things that can be easily described as bisexual and/or homosexual but they insist – and, often, fervently so – that they are very straight.  The perception that bro jobs only happen between men who identify as straight is, in fact, a lie – bro jobs can happen regardless to accepted sexuality; it’s just a more… explosive topic of discussion to imply that this is something straight guys are getting into and, again, because the other perception is that straight guys are never of a mind to suck a dick or be sucked by another guy.  Clearly, this cannot be true and is just another thing that constantly amazes me that so many people are willing to believe this perception than accept the truth that for reasons that don’t make sense to a lot of people, men have oral sex with each other and, often simply, because they can.

It’s taboo and forbidden in all religions and because it is, ha, that’s reason enough for guys to blow each other; I mean, seriously, there must be a reason why this is a bad thing for guys to do, right?  Some guys do suck cock just for the naughty thrill of trashing the rules along with it being fun to do anyway.  I’ve written that the bro job is being touted as something new on the scene… and it isn’t; if it’s anything, it’s an outgrowth of that experimentation phase that we’ve been known to go through and a “phase” that some folks don’t put a lot of stock in – boys will be boys… but when the boys are grown men, well, this is somehow different and maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think it really is except while boys being boys is a curious, new hormone driven thing we can somehow get into, when grown straight men decide that sucking each other’s dick is a good thing to do, it’s all about the justification to do so.

And any justification will work.  Some articles seemed to think that putting it out there that there’s nothing gay happening here is an important connotation or as an article said, it’s plausible deniability.  Still, in the way I look at things, it seems to me that if two straight guys are doing something that gay men are notoriously famous for doing, um, how can you say that there’s nothing gay going on here?  Is it okay for two straight dude to blow each other’s brains out and insist that they’re still straight?  I’m seeing that it apparently is which, again, strikes me as being a bit hilarious given that we live in a world that insists and maintains that actions always speak louder than words… except for this.

At the end of any day, the only thing I think matters is that if “Al” and “Frank” are hanging out and decide that, you know, sucking each other off would be just what the doctor ordered right about now, it’s what works and if someone wants to make it a sexuality issue, well, that’s on them.  I know that they happen and sexuality doesn’t always play into the decision of whether or not it’s gonna happen; if anything, “I won’t tell if you won’t!” is invoked and whatever the guys think about themselves is… whatever they think about themselves and even if those thoughts don’t make a lot of sense to anyone else.  Our two hypothetical guys could very well find themselves blitzed and it’s a good idea to blow each other; we know that alcohol, a central nervous system (CNS) depressant, can lower/erase inhibitions; neither of these guys, when sober, might not even think about such a thing… but when buzzed?  Sounds like a great idea – let’s do this!  Maybe they regret it when they sober up, maybe they don’t; the point is that when the topic comes up, folks should just look past the bullshit and understand a few things (even if they find it distasteful):  It’s not about guys being gay or bi or even maintaining that they’re straight; it’s a thing that guys do if they can, want to, or need to do; sometimes it’s just about the need for release, sometimes it’s about male bonding and while people tend to think of relationships in romantic terms, being friends – and even really good friends – with someone is, in fact, a relationship.

Anyone who thinks this is unlikely is someone I’d have to wonder about how much they know about men.  It’s not ab out rightness or wrongness as much as what we have the potential to do… and even when we don’t believe that we do or could do such a thing with a friend or otherwise.  True enough, not all men would participate in a bro job… but I think it’s unrealistic bullshit to believe that two straight guys couldn’t find a reason to suck each other off because it’s just sex, just something to do, or even as an act of compassion.

 
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Posted by on 25 May 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: The Big Finish

One of my favorite recurring topics on the bi guy forum are the ones that are about blow jobs and swallowing.  The one that popped up today (or, at the least, I just saw it today) was the one about a guy wanting to taste his own spunk… but just couldn’t bring himself to do it.  I remembered this particular thread because there was another that day where quite a few guys were wondering why after busting a nut, they became disinterested in sex and some said they felt pretty shitty after the fact.

First, while it is true that a lot of guys suck cock, the perception is that swallowing is always done… and the truth is, um, no, not always because some guys just never get used to the taste and consistency of spunk and one of the things here is that both taste and consistency aren’t… consistent.  It can be a little or a lot, thin and watery, and even cloying, thick, and viscous and while we tend to think about the taste of spunk as being a stumbling block, more often than not, it’s consistency that can mess with a guy’s head.  I usually don’t get into how to acquire the taste but for this scribble, the “easiest” way to handle the taste is to not let the front of your tongue get involved – that’s where the majority of your taste buds are so trying to catch it somewhere around the middle of your tongue and as far back as you can go a long way to acquiring the taste… because ya probably aren’t gonna taste it a whole lot.  It does seem to be a bit of a contradiction that there are guys who want to cream another guy’s tonsils (and expect the other guy to accept the creaming) – but when it comes to getting their tonsils whitewashed, um, ew –  that shit’s nasty!  Anyway…

Do guys wonder what their stuff tastes like?  Sure they do and while they’re rubbing one out, it can sound like a great idea that, this time, when I cum, I’m gonna find out what it tastes like!  The big finish arrives, the spunk is flowing and there it is, all over your hand and fingers but by the time most guys remember that they wanted to taste it, that blissful feeling of their release has passed… and now they’re into that refractory period that makes their brain say, “Huh?  You wanna do what now?  Ew!  Don’t even go there, man!  Where’s the toilet paper?”  Now, when the period hits us, our minds might be saying, “Hey, let’s do this shit again!” but our bodies are now depleted of the organic stew that’s responsible for horniness and, importantly, makes our dicks get hard; once that mish-mash of chemicals is depleted, it takes a while before they’re stocked up again and, even though we may be eager to screw again, eh, a guy can really get to understand the old saying that the mind is willing but the flesh is weak… because, in essence, it really is weak.

Some of the guys that responded to this thread suggested that the OP dump his load into a shot glass and then take it to the head – and I can’t honestly say whether this really works or not.  I had chimed in on the topic and offered that if you’re gonna give your stuff a taste when it’s all over your fingers, just do it because if you give yourself time to think about doing it, chances are refraction will be all over you like a very bad habit and you’re gonna feel too repulsed to do it.  It also occurred to me that the best time/moment to give your fingers a good licking is while the stuff is still body-temperature warm; if ya wait those precious seconds and allow it to cool down from your body temperature, yeah, it might not be that good of a thing to do.

A lot of the guys said that they’d rather get their sperm right from the source, i.e., there’s a guy with his dick in your mouth and it’s pumping away like crazy.  Sure, this ain’t tasting your own stuff but it’s probably easier to get your cum fix this way than to convince yourself to lick your hand and fingers clean.  Some other guys professed their love of creampies… but if a guy thinks it’s difficult to lick his cum off of his fingers, many find it even more difficult to go back down on a woman after dumping a load of spunk in her.  Some guys think that this is just plain nasty but methinks what is really at work here is our ancient enemy – refraction; it just takes us out of the game and to the point where even thinking about sex can make some guys physically ill.  Refraction and its effects are also the reason why some guys don’t want to be sucked off because once they cum, that’s all folks – until he’s had time to replenish his stock of biochemicals that will reignite his lust and make his dick harder than times in 1929 again.  The thing about this is that it’s not always the same; some guys can cum and get it right back up literally in a couple of minutes… but the next time, he might cum and the homey between his legs will take a nap that could last a couple of days and no matter how much he thinks he wants to have sex.

In similar threads, guys have asked, “Well, do you have to swallow a guy’s load?”  The answer is, no – not if you don’t want to but there’s this expectation (for lack of a better word) that if you’re sucking a guy’s dick and there’s no fucking on the menu, when he cums, you should swallow it.  It’s no secret that guys who swallow are more highly prized than guys who don’t swallow and I’ve seen way too many times that when talking to a guy online about what you’re into, one of the big questions asked is, “Do you swallow?”  I actually find this interesting in that unless a guy says that he doesn’t (or won’t suck dick), it’s assumed that if you’re into M2M, you are, by default, a cock sucker.  By and large – and as I said in my second paragraph – a lot of guys do suck cock… not ever guy can or even wants to swallow the big finish that’s sure to arrive if you suck it long enough.  Some guys are into giving and getting facials and I’m thinking that, on the receiving end, a guy has too many qualms about swallowing it and, oddly, some guys can’t cut loose inside another guy’s mouth; of course, there’s porn and its infamous money shot and it makes it appear that after spending x-amount of time sucking on a guy’s dick, the big payoff for the sucker is getting a face-full of cum (or wherever it winds up going).

A lot of guys (and I’m one of them) say that, look, dude, if I’m gonna spend all of this time and effort to suck your cock and get you to cum, I want the reward for all that effort, meaning, you’d better not snatch it out of my mouth and cum or there will be much hell to pay.  I even recall telling a guy, during a cock sucking session and when he said, “I wanna cum on your face!” I stopped long enough to tell him, “You do that and I’m gonna punch you in the face…”  What is it about swallowing cum?  That’s kinda hard to explain; some of it is in defiance of the M2M taboo, it actually feels pretty good to feel the other guy’s dick pumping away, but I think there’s also something about taking another man’s seed and consuming it and if I could explain this, I would… but I can’t seem to find any words that would do what’s in my head any justice.

Besides, swallowing is a rather efficient method of “getting rid of the evidence” when guys are “sneaking” off to blow each other.  In any event, dealing with a guy’s big finish can been seen as mandatory, simply a desirable thing to do, or even an optional one.  When there’s no actual intercourse in the offing, cock sucking is the thing to do and you just know – or you should know – that if you suck on a guy’s dick long enough and in the right ways, unless he’s got some kind of mental block set up in his head, he’s gonna cum.  Maybe he’ll be nice enough to warn you before the fact or maybe you’re paying enough attention to pick up on the clues that he’s about to cut loose but a guy who knows that they’re gonna be involved in a cock sucking session has a bit of time to decide on whether he’s gonna swallow or not… and it’s not like he can’t change his mind and invoke proper etiquette and spit it out.

Can a guy acclimate himself to the issues around swallowing by eating his own cum?  Yeah, he can… if he can get his head around doing it and that’s not always as easy as it sounds.  My protegé and I were talking about this a while ago and he admitted to wondering what his stuff tasted like but, like a lot of guys, couldn’t get up the “nerve” to do it.  He asked me – and I expected the question – if I’ve ever tasted my own spunk and I honestly told him that I have and, at least in my own opinion, I think I taste pretty good.  He asked – and, again, I anticipated the question – how one goes about getting up the nerve to do it and I told him what I said here:  Just do it and don’t hesitate or stop to think about it.  Again, it seems odd that we are willing to subject someone else to the taste of our cum but the thought of tasting it ourselves is enough to make one toss their cookies.  If nothing else, it’s my opinion that a guy should taste his stuff so he can understand what he’s asking someone else to taste.

There are a lot of guys who want to experience tasting spunk but they’ve not been able to get to the point where they can suck someone off to get the experience… so tasting their own stuff, if nothing else, can probably satisfy their urge to taste cum… but only if they can literally be brave enough to do it.   The moment a guy begins to ejaculate, refraction starts to set in so there’s a potentially small window in which to pull this off before that sense of revulsion kicks in.  Some guys manage to accomplish this feat of auto-eroticism, some don’t.

 

 
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Posted by on 5 May 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: What Are They Waiting For?

There aren’t too many times where I visit the bi guy forum and see either an old post being commented on or a new one that’s been created about what it’s like to suck another man’s cock (and swallow his seed).  Every time I see this come up and see guys writing that they wanna do this but haven’t, I ask myself, “Well, what are you waiting for?”

The question is kinda rhetorical because some guys do speak to why they’re waiting, what they’re waiting for, and even who they’re waiting for.  They talk about their concerns and concerns centered on the potential health risk, something that’s very real but, goodness, a lot of guys act as if they’re gonna catch something simply as a matter of course.  To this end, someone had quoted the CDC and their position that today, the chances of a guy catching something nasty is less than four percent; not exactly zero but given the number of potential male cock suckers that exist – and estimates are in the millions, four percent is pretty low when one considers that this number used to be frightfully higher… like double digits higher… like damn near epidemic proportions higher.

Guys hit the forum and, wisely, I think, ask what it’s like and many experienced cock suckers jump in and share what it’s like for them.  One of the things I know and I’ve seen is that it’s not easy putting what it’s like to suck cock into words other than, “It feels good!”  I’ve allowed that how it really feels, outside of being subjective, just defies attempts to be described with mere words so, as such, it’s not easy to tell a guy wanting to know what the deal is what goes on in one’s mind when mouth meets cock and sperm winds up flowing.

Some guys say that sucking cock makes them feel dominant while many say that it make them feel deliciously submissive; today, one guy commented that it makes him feel girly and that’s a wonderful feeling for him.  As the topic tends to do at times, there was a bit of men versus women mentioned but at least to me, that’s to be expected but as I commented today, I don’t know too many guys who haven’t, as some point, wondered what it was like to suck dick and/or have asked a woman what it’s like.  Again, a guy can get all kinds of input about this, both good and not so good because the cock sucking experience is subjective – more “eye of the beholder” than anything else but, um, if you really wanna know what it’s like, there’s no better way to find out than to get off your ass, set any fears aside, and go suck a dick.

Methinks the number one reason why many of the forum’s membership is on the sidelines waiting to get in the game is not being able to find someone they can do this to… but I don’t think this is really the case because even though there are areas of the US (in particular) where there’s not what anyone would call a great selection of candidates, it’s not that they can’t find a willing dick to suck but a matter of some of them not wanting to do the work in order to find said willing dick.  I know – and because many guys share this information – that they are sitting and waiting for a particular or specific guy and based on criteria like age, ethnicity, physical fitness and, yup, cock size is, unsurprisingly, quite high on the list of requirements.  Whenever I read a guy who hasn’t taken the plunge yet talk about how he’d like his first time to be with a big dick, I kinda chuckle (or roll my eyes) and think that if they knew what I knew, um, they might wanna rethink this a little; it’s one thing to watch any kind of porn and see cock suckers on the screen working over huge dicks (and some making it look stupidly easy)… it’s something very different trying to consume a thick, ten-inch cock and its owner is of a mind to fuck your mouth like it’s pussy.  Some guys find out the hard way that while sucking on a huge dick looks nice on the screen and is hot to think about, um, well, hmm – it’s not all that easy and it’s not fun to have one’s gag reflex provoked.  True enough, some guys might not be all that picky about cock size so if they run across a monster dick, it’s merely a challenge for them and one that they’re willing to undertake… because it’s a dick to be sucked.

When you ask a guy what he’s waiting for, one of the things I’ve noticed is such a guy rarely mentions that he’s just afraid to go for it.  Some guys are afraid that they’re gonna like it, some afraid that they won’t like it and for reasons I don’t really understand (but know about), some guys are afraid that someone is gonna find out that he broke down and sucked a dick, you know, like he does it and now he’s somehow broadcasting to one and all that he broke the taboo and gave  a dude some head.  Realistically, unless the other guy rats you out to someone you know – or you really fuck up and get caught in the act by someone you know, the only way someone else is gonna find out that you sucked a cock is if you tell them you did.   Yeah, such a fear might sound silly but to many, it’s very real because one might not know what it’s like to give a guy a rousing blow job but they do know about the potential backlash that’s associated with such an act between men.

Every now and then, a guy will confess that the reason why he’s riding the pine on this one is because they’re not sure how to suck a dick or worried that they won’t be able to do it to the other guy’s satisfaction.  It speaks to something that I think is a legit concern:  A guy can worry about this because getting his dick sucked isn’t the same as being the one doing the sucking and most guys on the receiving end have some pretty high expectations and even from someone who is on the precipice of having their first try at doing it.  Now, some first time guys prove to be surprisingly good the first time they give head and I’m thinking it’s because they are determined to do this and do it to the best of their abilities.  Indeed, a lot of guys practice on dildos and, yes, even with bananas and, spectacularly, with cucumbers.  It is, most certainly, good practice for the real thing… and still different.  Working over an inanimate object and one that you have total control over is easy but when it comes to working over a living cock, well, shit can get interesting and, if for no other reason, a dildo isn’t going to start pumping gooey sperm into your mouth at some point and a cucumber or banana isn’t going to grab your head and go bat-shit crazy just before introducing spunk into your oral cavity.

Still, it’s not as if a guy wanting and waiting to do this can’t find these things out from other men who have taken the plunge and, indeed, obtain some very good and helpful information as well as learning how this didn’t quite work out the way someone thought it would.  So when a guy has taken in all this information, um, the question remains:  What are they waiting for?  Sigh… I’ve been of a mind that cock sucking between men has gotten too… specific.  Like, it’s not enough to just locate a willing dude; it’s become so conditional – the right guy in the right place at the right time and unless those conditions are all met, nothing happens.  It’s one thing for a guy to say that he had a chance to give his first blow job but, shit, just couldn’t bring himself to do it – but this is to be expected.  But when I see a guy saying that he passed on sucking his first dick because, say, the other guy’s dick wasn’t big/fat enough or the guy admitted to not manscaping his crotch or wasn’t old enough, young enough, “fit” enough and even lacking skin pigmentation or having too much of said pigmentation, wow, and you still think that women are really funny about sucking dick?

At times I feel sorry for all those guys who so very much want to suck cock but keep coming up with more reasons why they shouldn’t than having reasons why they should.  Granted, it’s not for everyone and the acquired taste thing doesn’t just apply to spunk.  I understand just how damned scary that first time can be and while there are those who feel that men who suck cock are just a bunch of sissy-assed bitches, those same people don’t know or can appreciate how much manly guts it takes to put a hard dick into your mouth and suck on it until it spills and softens.  To the men who’ve said that they wanna do it – they need to do it – but just can’t seem to, I tell them that while this is very understandable, sometimes, ya just gotta say, “Fuck it…” and do it; if there’s some regret in any of this, I think the biggest regret is knowing that you could have done it but you didn’t and not so much that you did it and maybe found it not as much to your liking as you thought it would be.  No matter what some people think, sucking dick is one of those things that you just don’t know whether or not it’s for you and/or it’s all it’s been made out to be…

Until you do it.

 
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Posted by on 10 April 2018 in Uncategorized

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Cock Sucking

It’s the one thing a bi guy should be able to do and if he chooses not to perfect this skill, not only is he missing out on something but he might find himself not getting as much action as he’d like.  It’s an entry level event for bi guys, that foot in the door and other than being poked in the butt, it’s probably the one thing that curious guys want to know about and experience.  It is true that some guys try it and find it not to their liking for some reason; there are guys who would never give another guy head and, historically, it’s too girly a thing to do and I actually heard one guy say that he’d never give a blow job because it’s just too gay for him… but he’d cream a guy’s butt without giving it a second thought.

For many men into this, it’s like a very addictive drug and one they can never get enough of; while there are other things two guys can do, they’d rather suck dick than to do any of those other things.  For some, eh, it’s an expected thing to do, something to do for a few moments before a hard one winds up in someone’s backside and while giving head is probably the most done thing between two guys, there are some who feel that doing this really isn’t sex so it doesn’t have a great deal of importance to them.

Cityman and I were talking about this one day and I offered up the opinion that anyone can lube up and slide their dick into someone’s ass – it doesn’t require much in the way of skill… but not everyone can suck a dick.  As many know, doing this does require a bit of skill but as I mentioned to Cityman, it also calls for quite a bit of desire on the part of the guy doing the sucking or if you don’t love doing it, how much fun could it be?  We talked about the differences – men versus women – and there are many, many men who feel that while women can be good at it, men are much better and I offered, once again, that “good” and “bad” are arbitrary and subjective terms and are also subject to being influenced by expectations.

Forget, for the moment, what you might see in any porn you might watch because it doesn’t really reflect reality when it comes to giving a blow job.  Forget all that face-fucking shit you might also see or have heard about; I’m old school about that because if a guy is trying to shove his dick down my throat as far as he can get it, that’s not me giving head but, yeah, there are a lot of guys who feel that if the other guy doesn’t have a serious grip on his head and fucking his mouth and throat as, ah, energetically as he can, well, that’s not their idea of giving head or fun at all.

Why learn how to do it?  Again, it’s kind of an expectation; unless stated otherwise, if “Wayne” and “Pete” hook up with each other, at the very least, dicks are gonna get sucked.  It doesn’t require any preparation other than washing your crotch or breaking out the weed whacker if you’ve got a jungle between your legs.  It can be done almost anywhere and literally can be completed in less than a minute or as long as an hour.  I said to Cityman that being able to give a guy head will be remembered more than whether or not asses got fucked satisfactorily and that probably the worst thing that can be said about a guy is that he can’t or didn’t suck dick – and no matter how well he can fuck or be fucked.

Just like eating pussy, you either love doing it, you just like doing it, or you’ll do it because it’s expected and it’s seen as a chore; which mindset do you think winds up working the best here?

On the bi guy forum, this is probably the most talked about topic and while there are a lot of guys who also want to be screwed and creamed, ya mon, the one thing they seriously want to do is suck dick and acquire that taste for spunk – and that includes guys who think of themselves as straight despite wanting to do this.  I’ve talked at times about the bro-job, that seemingly odd thing where two straight guys will choose to go down on each other, you know, to help a brotha out when he’s horny and boning some babe ain’t gonna happen when it needs to.  Returning to porn, yup, you probably can’t watch any porn without seeing dicks being sucked and I think a lot of guys get bitten by the curious bug because, um, it’s pretty interesting to watch it being done so, sure, what’s it like to do it?  Porn, being the visual stimulus that it is, is about the money shot so you see people who suck dick get spunk shot all over their face or the guy being sucked suddenly takes his dick back and jacks off until a load shoots into a mouth that looks so anxious to receive it.  And while this is some bi guys’ idea of fun, for many, once they get their mouth on the dick, they’re not gonna settle for getting blasted in the face or having the dick taken away just before ejaculation occurs.

For those who love to suck dick, there’s no better feeling than to feel the other guy’s dick swell and then pulse and keep on pulsing as he gives up his load and your mouth is glued to the dick as the other guy cums.  There are a lot of nearly indescribable feelings while sucking a dick and those, all by themselves, is worth the effort it takes to give head… but that moment when you hear him curse and feel his body preparing to release?  Priceless… and in the opinion of many, that moment makes all the work it took to get him to this point well worth it.  Even I say that if I’m gonna suck some guy’s dick, I want the reward at the end and no matter how long it takes to get it.

Those of you who don’t suck cock, think it’s a chore, or otherwise ain’t a fan of it, sure, there are reasons why you feel this way; I’ve always said that when a guy starts sucking dick, one of the things he will learn is why a lot of women don’t want to do it.  But it’s an occupational hazard of sorts because it’s almost a given that at some point in your cock sucking career, you’re gonna find yourself in a situation where, yeah, you’re gonna wish you hadn’t done it and usually because – and this is probably just my opinion – there are guys who just do not know how to get their dick sucked.  There are guys who love to suck cock but, nah, they haven’t acquired the taste… and nothing will turn a good cock sucking session into a bad one faster than you telling the guy not to cum in your mouth… and he does it anyway and disregards proper cock sucking etiquette and lets you know that he’s gonna cum.

These things happen but it’s also the kind of things that draws a line between those who love to suck cock and everyone else:  The guy who loves to suck cock will be pissed about it but it won’t stop him from sucking cock going forward; he understands that one “bad experience” doesn’t mean every experience he has will be his idea of a bad one.

I said this to Cityman:  What’s the purpose of sucking dick if you’re not gonna work at being as good at it as you can be?  If you’re not gonna always give your best effort when doing it, why bother to do it at all?  Again, if you think of it as a chore that ranks right up there with, say, cleaning the toilet, it’s not gonna be a lot of fun for anyone involved.

 
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Posted by on 10 March 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Hooked

I was just on the bi guy forum and saw an old post where the OP said that he was worried that if he sucked a dick, he’d find that he liked it and would want to do it again.  When we think about the reasons why a lot of guys hesitate to throw down with another dude, there’s a bunch of “standard” reasons that I won’t bother to repeat here because if you’ve been with me for a while, you’ve seen them hundreds of times… but the one you don’t hear so much about is a guy is eager to suck cock but hasn’t…

Because he knows he’s gonna like it and get hooked on doing it and that seems to present a problem for some guys.  I know why it’s problematic and it’s not unusual for a guy to get his first taste of cock and experiencing a mad rush to suck every and any cock he can get his mouth around.  In my own experiences, jeez, it’s so heart-warming to have a guy stop sucking me and he’s got this mystified look on his face and asks, “Why didn’t I do this before now?” or “I thought it was gonna be bad… but it wasn’t!”  I’ve seen guys go through a kind of transition, from being anxious to do it while being quite leery, which is understandable because it’s one thing to have someone suck your cock or to watch it via porn or whatever… and something very different when, literally, there’s a cock inches from your face just waiting to be sucked.

I’ve seen guys have that “Fuck it…” moment and they’re off and running and now they’re trying to figure out what to do; again, just because you’ve seen dicks being sucked doesn’t necessarily mean you know how to do it.  I’ve felt that moment of, “What the fuck am I doing?” just as I’ve felt that… shift in their thinking as they realize that sucking dick isn’t as bad as they may have heard.  It’s my habit of talking to guys before anything happens so that they understand what it is they’re about to get into and, yes, we talk about that acquired taste he’s heard about.  Some guys seem to think that if you suck cock, swallowing the spunk has to be done and I assure them that they don’t.  Politeness says that if someone’s sucking your cock for the first time you warn them before you cut loose – and even if you’ve had this conversation before the fact.

Some guys heed the warning and stop… and some guys don’t; some guys handle it as if they’re old hands at it and, well, some guys don’t and, sometimes, in spectacular fashion.  Some guys will do it once and never have or feel the need to experience it again; some guys don’t really know if they liked doing it or not and actually go for it a second time just to figure out if they liked – or disliked – the first time.  And some guys just flat-out get hooked on doing it right out of the gate.  I think there are a lot of guys who can’t foresee how things will go for them should they suck cock for the first time and get hooked on it.  Many are quite paranoid about the whole world finding out that he gave a dude a blow job and I’ve had to tell guys that, um, the only way someone is gonna find out that you did this is if you tell them you did and if anyone asks me, I have no idea what they’re talking about, okay?

What does it feel like to be hooked on sucking cock?  It’s kinda crazy, kinda comforting and satisfying and a whole lot of other things I’ve never been able to put into words.  It can be one hell of an ego trip, depending on how your mind works; some guys get hooked on it and it makes them feel delightfully submissive while some guys are just the opposite – those are the guys who’ll go down on you and there’s no question about who’s in charge here.  You might think that as the guy being blown, you’re running the show but, um, no – not really.  Some guys worry about technique but that can be learned every time you get your cock sucking fix; I’ve found that guys who get hooked on this will make it a main goal to be very good at it, not so much because it means the other guy will experience a fantastic blow job but because it winds up meaning a whole lot for their own satisfaction in doing this.

I go on the forum and read guys sharing their first time giving head and you can see it in the way they write that they’re hooked, that and they all say that they can’t wait to do it again.  And again.  And again.  I do tell them that along the way, um, they’re gonna find out why some women aren’t real fans of giving blow jobs – let’s face it, some guys are just assholes about it and, at least in my opinion, they don’t know shit about getting their dick sucked and I’m pretty sure that anyone who’s had to suffer through a bad blow job has done so because the other guy has been watching too much porn; fucking someone’s face isn’t the same as getting a blow job.  But that’s an occupational hazard and most guys who get hooked learn from such experiences and, importantly, don’t let a bad experience steal their newly found joy of sucking cock.

All in all, getting hooked on this isn’t a bad thing – it can only be bad if you entertain any thoughts in that direction.

 
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Posted by on 6 March 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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