Cityman and I were having a discussion about this and one of the things I love about talking to him is that sometimes he brings up topics of discussion that make me sit back and think about things and in ways I’ve either not thought of or haven’t thought about since Hector was a puppy.
Like, in the M2M world of sex, sucking cock is a seemingly mandatory skill a guy must learn and master and it is assumed that all guys who get with guys suck cock… but not all guys do. Likewise, it is assumed that all male cock suckers swallow, er, the fruits of their labor… and the truth is nah, not all guys are of a mind to swallow it or even allow it in their mouth. It’s known that some men turn to other men for blow jobs, not because they have (or run into) a woman who won’t blow them but because they’re not of a mind to finish him this way – but it’s also known that guys who suck cock do finish the job.
When guys are negotiating a hookup, two questions that are almost always asked are, “Do you give head?” and “Do you swallow?” and the answers usually determine how the rest of the negotiation goes; answer yes to both and the conversation continues; answer no to one or both and the conversation can come to a screeching halt. But, thinking about the guys who do swallow, well, um, why do it at all? Some guys do it because it’s expected while some guys do it simply because it gives them one hell of a rush to do so as well as a sense of it being their “reward” for whatever effort they put out in order to get him to bust that nut. Having said that, some guys won’t allow sperm to enter their mouth because they’ve never acquired the taste and some fear catching something if the other dude cuts loose in their mouth. Something about this last thing, like, since a lot of guys give and receive head without using a condom, the moment mouth meets bare dick, the risk is assumed at that moment and not just when the other guy cums. The CDC says there’s a four percent chance of catching something via oral sex but you’re likely to have a problem if you have advanced gum disease, cuts or abrasions in your mouth, unfilled cavities, or all of the above; otherwise, the chemistry of the saliva in your mouth not only keeps your mouth and gums from drying out but starts the process of digesting whatever you’ve put into your mouth via some powerful enzymes… and whatever your saliva doesn’t outright destroy, the hydrochloric acid in your stomach will most certainly do the job.
Okay, just had to toss that one in, you know, just in case ya didn’t know this.
Some guys admit to feeling “girly” if a guy cums in their mouth and, indeed, some guys feel, think, or otherwise believe that if they suck a cock – but the guy doesn’t cum in their mouth, it’s not a gay thing to do… and if you’re reading this and rolling your eyes, join the club and be a member in good standing of the Association of Eye Rollers. It’s not that I’ve never heard this one before so I’ve often wondered why a guy can feel this way and I think that a lot of it has to do with the perception that sucking cock (with or without swallowing) is a woman’s thing to do so if you’re a guy doing it, yup, it’s girly. I’ve also thought that porn sends some pretty bad messages about sucking cock and getting creamed tonsils and thanks to their infamous money shot; you see guys getting blown then they take the dick away and jerk themselves off to either give a facial, spray it all over the place or to deposit the goo onto a waiting tongue. But one of the things you can see is how the person giving the blow job has this… eager, excited and anticipatory look on their face as they await that first shot of spunk to come their way, like it’s the most orgasmically exciting thing ever. In straight porn, you see women in this position and upon getting a face full, oh, they look so happy and, I’ll say, submissively eager as they await that first shot and in gay porn, you can see that very same behavior being portrayed and I don’t know about anyone else but it reeks of submissive behavior and we tend to associate submissive behavior as being girly. As an aside, oh, man, do I ever love seeing those women who know they’re supposed to take it in the face and you can tell by the look on their face that they’re not feeling this part of the scene at all – they’d rather undergo a root canal without any anesthetic.
The usual caveat: I am not even trying to insult any women by saying this so, ladies, put the straight razors away.
Cityman had asked me if I was afraid to swallow the first time and I admitted that I wasn’t as much afraid as I was surprised by “suddenly” feeling something warm and gooey squirting into my mouth and I swallowed it purely out of reflex – it was either that or gag on it and I even said that it never occurred to me to spit it out. Still, I didn’t find the taste objectionable – I thought it tasted pretty good. Going forward, if a guy was shooting it, I was swallowing it although I pointed out there were times when a guy would put more into my mouth than I could immediately handle and, oops, some of it got away but that just made me determined to not miss any. Nine times out of ten, if I suck a guy’s dick and he cums, I’m gonna swallow it and that one time represents situations where I’ve discovered it’s not gonna taste good or I just want to see him lose his load. That “I wanna give you a facial!” shit is a guaranteed way to get hurt… I even told Cityman that swallowing gets rid of the evidence and there’s no mess to clean up.
Proper blow job etiquette says that you don’t have to swallow it; if you get it in your mouth, you can spit it out and, really, you don’t have to let him do it in your mouth at all if you don’t want to… but people who swallow (even if they spit it out later) are more prized than those who refuse to swallow. The whole thing could very well and “simply” be a guy thing; ejaculating into a space feels better than doing it outside of a space, as in when we masturbate – it feels good to cum but it just feels better when we do in a mouth, pussy, or even a butt, a fake vagina/mouth or something like a Fleshlight – sorry, it’s just the way we’re wired.
The discussion kinda went in a slightly different direction but still rather relevant: Is cock sucking really a submissive thing to do? Some of the guys on the bi guy forum say that it makes them feel very submissive to blow a guy and take his cum while others say that the other guy just thinks he’s being dominant in this and, as such, he’s in charge of what’s happening because the guy doing the sucking is being dominant by making homey give up the nut – taking it away from him as opposed to “submissively” waiting for him to give it up. I recall a guy saying that he really didn’t like getting a mouthful of spunk… but he did love being made to take it and swallow it; sounds kinda weird but it does play into how some very masculine men can love feeling very “girly” and submissive when when having sex with another guy.
Some guys say they feel very damned naughty when they swallow; since they’re not supposed to be sucking a dude’s dick in the first place, swallowing his seed just adds to the rush of thumbing their nose at the ancient taboo. What I know is guys swallow more often than they don’t whether it’s out of obligation, an expectation, or they just don’t feel that the job is complete until the spunk has been consumed. Again, I point to something I’ve heard a lot of guys say, that being, where some women are loathe to do any swallowing, there are guys who specifically swallow and because it’s known that some women ain’t fans of doing it. Some say by partaking of each other’s seed, it creates a bond between us that’s pretty special… but I’ve also heard some more darker thoughts expressed by some guys, like it makes the feel dominant and powerful to make a guy submit to sucking his cock and by getting a mouthful of spunk, it emasculates the guy getting his tonsils creamed. And while some guys do feel “girly,” there are guys who don’t feel anything but great satisfaction when emptying someone’s balls.
One of the ongoing arguments about blow jobs are those guys who’d rather eat shit and die before they’d suck a dude’s dick… but they are quick to feed a guy his dick and cum and if they aren’t of a mind to do either thing, well, they’re just a punk-assed bitch for not being man enough to suck the dick and eat the spunk. True, a lot of guys are leery about doing some swallowing – what will it taste like? Again and again, it’s true that it’s an acquired taste and that it’s just not the taste alone that must be acquired; consistency and volume are part of the acquiring the taste thing as well.
To swallow or not to swallow… that is the question. The answer is you don’t have to if you don’t want to – the other guy might be disappointed.