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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Why Are You Doing It?

On the heels of “TBT:  Who Is Better?” on of the things that I think play heavily into this is why someone is sucking cock to begin with and, doing a bit of generalization, men and women do it for different reasons and reasons that I’ll do my best to explain.  I’ll get this right up front and say that y’all don’t have to agree with me but I’m just telling you some things that I’ve observed over all this time.

Sassy Sara commented on my last scribble and mentioned that she’s been going to town on her hubby and expecting, at some point, to have his tool inside her but realizes that he’s close to exploding so she keeps going until he does… and this particular thing is one of the reasons why some women are loath to endure finishing off a blow job; they know that if he’s allowed to cum, she’s not gonna get screwed in that moment or later (and when she might not be in the mood) or not at all.

Good reasons not to finish a blow job, right?  Some say this is selfishness, some say it’s a necessity because her needs should always supersede his needs so he shouldn’t ever expect to be finished unless she’s giving him head because that’s all she wants to do.

It’s not totally a case of women not liking to give head but one of a combination of things, like, it’s hard work and the bigger the cock, the harder it is to work; some guys in her past have managed to make sucking cock a rather miserable thing for her to do and when you combine these two particular things, if she’s going down on you, it’s usually because it’s expected of her or, in her mind, merely a prelude to her getting nailed… and let’s not ignore that getting a mouthful of stuff is still very much an acquired taste and one that is always subject to change even with the same guy.  It’s the reason why a guy cannot step to a woman (or his woman) and ask her for a complete blow job without getting his head handed to him in some way.  Well, he can ask… it’s a sure bet he’s not gonna like her response and/or answer.

It’s also something that some women can be in a hurry to get done with and for the reasons I’ve already mentioned.  Let me, at this point, add in another peculiarity that, among men, adds to this situation, namely, how some women demand to be eaten and giving her a few token licks is not what she had in mind; I’ve heard too many men complain that they don’t understand why a woman will be so demanding about being eaten for long periods of time… but if he were to suggest she suck him off, shit tends to hit the fan.

Which is a nice segue into why there are guys who like to suck cock and be sucked by other guys.  The thought here is that another guy is – or should be – willing to do that which women, “apparently” aren’t of a mind to do as well as it is assumed that all guys who into sex with other guys suck dick as a matter of course and by default and unless some fucking is on the list of things to do, finishing things is expected and for many men, required.

Let’s not forget that there are a lot of guys who are into sex with other guys who wouldn’t suck a dick even if you put a gun to their head and cocked the trigger nor should we forget that just like women, men do get subjected to bad cock sucking experiences that will impact and effect their willingness to suck a dick going forward and, yes, including that, “I’m not gonna cum in your mouth – I promise!” thing that many women have experienced.  Then, not all guys who suck cock acquire the taste and guys to find out, just as women have, that sucking dick and getting the guy off isn’t always as easy as one might think it is so for some guys, sucking a dick and working to get the guy off is more of an effort than they want to expend and, sometimes, time is a factor which is also why a lot of guys are game for a blow job session because when compared to what it takes to get dick into ass safely, blow jobs take less time and can be done almost anywhere.

But just like some women, a lot of guys suck cock because they’re expected to and as a prelude of getting poked by the dick they’re sucking – again, like women, guys expecting to be fucked aren’t gonna be of a mind to finishing off the cock in their mouth because they know that when the other guy cums, it’s game over for an unknown period of time. So to the guy doing the sucking, not finishing the job makes sense to him… but to the guy on the receiving end, well, he just experienced a bad blow job because he wasn’t allow to cum that way.

For both men and women, all of this should sound familiar, right?  Cocks get sucked – or pussies get eaten – out of expected obligation and as foreplay for the main event – putting A into B or C.  One pointed difference is that there are guys who aren’t into anal sex at all so their one and only thing to do is to suck cock and since this is the only thing they wanna do with another guy, they’re gonna be pretty gung ho to do the job and finish it… provided the other guy cooperates.  Guys in this frame of mind are… dedicated to making that dick hard and making it soft and no matter how long it takes to do it but it is to note that when time is a factor, some guys can be quite aggressive when working the dick, the thought here being the quicker nuts can be busted, the faster one can get back to whatever they were doing before taking a cock break.

Um, some guys don’t respond well to aggressive cock sucking which can divert attention from the pleasures of being sucked to worrying about any discomfort he’s feeling, like too much teeth being involved, sucking too hard, and even being gripped too hard or having their balls fondled too roughly for their tastes.  Then tack on the expectation factor, like a guy just expects that the guy going down on him knows exactly how to suck his dick and get him off… and unless it’s a guy you’ve been with before, uh, how is a new guy doing it gonna know exactly what it’s gonna take?

You’re beginning to see how this “Who’s better?” thing is starting to play out, aren’t you?  Then one of the most definitive and deciding factors – the notion of what’s a good blow job and what isn’t and a lot of guys are of a mind that if they aren’t made to cum – or allowed to cum – the blow job wasn’t all that and no matter whether it was a girl or a guy performing it.  It cannot be discounted that some guys do not know how to get their dick sucked and are of a mind that face fucking, for instance, is the same as getting a blow job and I tend to disagree with that and, yep, I lay the blame for this directly on porn which has gotten a lot of men thinking and believing that someone sucking their dick really wants to get gagged, have rivers of snot and tears flowing and just having their mouth and throat ravaged.

And while some do think this is their idea of cock sucking fun, that ain’t everyone who sucks cock and, indeed, there are some cock suckers who are of a mind that if something like this isn’t happening, the receiver must not be enjoying what’s being done and guys who do it as a matter of course probably believe that they’re not doing it right if they’re not trying to ram as much cock as they can into someone’s mouth.

If a cock sucker doesn’t like that, well, sure – the receiver is going to almost always label the blow job as bad because it didn’t meet their expectations.  A lot of guys point to technique as being a factor in determining or deciding between good and bad; as I’ve said a lot of times, technique is important… but just because Person A can deep throat the shit out of you but Person B is unable to, that doesn’t necessarily mean that the blow job is a bad one but, yeah, once again, expectations tend to play a very major role in this good/bad and who’s better thing.

But if you suck cock, why are you doing it?  Maybe you don’t think this has something to do with things… and if so, I’d say you’re probably very much mistaken and it is something that most people don’t think of… or really give a shit about.  The reason why someone sucks cock is tied to and/or related to both their ability to do it… and their desire to do it or, as mentioned many times, the difference between an obligatory action, liking it, and loving it and these three things impact cocks suckers and no matter if they’re male or female, that and if a receiver makes the cock sucking experience a nightmare for even the most eager cock sucker, that good, bad, and who’s better thing becomes more of an issue.

I’ve asked guys who suck cock what I think is a simple question:  When you’re sucking dick, who are you doing it for?  Are you sucking that dick because it makes you feel head-swimmingly wonderful… or are you sucking that dick to make its owner happy?  Would it surprise you that a lot of the guys who’ve answered these questions will say that they’re doing it to make the other guy happy?  I’m not saying this is unimportant… but it’s my thought that if you’re not sucking dicks because it makes you happy, could that also play into the good, bad, and who’s better thing as well?

And, before you ask, I’ve been asked the same question(s) and my answer could be seen as a selfish one in that when I’m sucking cock (or even eating pussy) I’m doing it because it makes me feel very damned good to be doing it and, in turn, it makes the recipient a happy critter – unless they tell me otherwise, of course.

I think one of the things that also plays into this is the thought that cock sucking is a submissive act… but not every cock sucker looks at it as a submissive thing to do and, perhaps, depending on what the word “submissive” means to an individual.  Many cock sucking guys do say that the reason why they suck cock is because it makes them feel submissive and they like feeling that way.  I’m not saying this is a good or bad thing but it does factor in to that whole good, bad, or who’s better thing.

It’s really all about why and not so much how that I feel is key to this whole cock sucking thing.  It’s about incompatible expectations and you can read this as the cock sucker having one expectation and the recipient having a totally different one.  Sassy Sara mentioned a factoid that said only something like 13% of men actually cum from a blow job… and even she thinks this isn’t quite right (and neither do I) and there are a lot of reasons that support this… and also plays into good, bad, who’s better from the fact that some cock suckers who are expecting to be fucked will not allow or tolerate the recipient busting a nut to including the fact that some guys actually “cheat” when they’re expecting to be sucked by jerking off before the fact and that’s something that, in most men, will make getting him to cum again take a very long time to achieve… and if it happens at all.

If a cock sucker gets it into their head that the other person isn’t enjoying what’s being done, it will affect things… and even if the giver is really mistaken about that.  Technique, such as it is, will not only vary from one person to the next (and even with the same person) but whatever happens to be going through a giver’s mind in that moment can affect the outcome – and the pun is really intended this time… and if the giver has other expectations or has it in their mind that what they’re doing is way too much work, that, too, will play into any determination where good, bad, and who’s better is concerned.

One other thing that I think plays into this among men are those guys who want their dick sucked – or don’t want it sucked – because they know they’re gonna be enticed to lose their load before they want to and it’ll take them out of the game and put an end to anything else that might have been on the table… unless there’s sufficient time to allow recovery and a continuance of things… and sometimes, there’s no time for that.  As odd as it may seem, a guy who is enticed to cum before he wants to will view this as a bad blow job… because his expectations weren’t met and they didn’t take into consideration why the other guy is sucking his dick in the first place.

Is any of this overthinking things?  I don’t think so and considering how many guys want to not only have their dick sucked but be made to give up the jizz.  Again, between men, if the agreement is to exchange blow jobs, there are some hard-set expectations or, really, just one:  If you suck my dick, you’d better make me cum and if you don’t, you will be tagged as being bad at it and the “balance” between who’s better will tip one way or the other.

Maybe it’s just me but I think that guys should be, at the very least, grateful that someone is willing to suck their dick in the first place and instead of having an expectation of being made to cum, perhaps their focus should be more on how he’s being made to feel while being sucked.  If they can, um, it might help to know if the person sucking their dick even wants them to cum – and sometimes they don’t and it’s not necessarily because busting a nut is a game-ending event or they haven’t acquire the taste for spunk but because sucking on a hard dick is very pleasing and as long as it’s hard – and its owner hasn’t unloaded, the longer the pleasure can last for the giver.

So in many ways, it’s all about why it’s being done and more than a means to an expected end.  I can remember many a conversation with women about why I suck dick and I’ve responded initially by asking them, “Why do you do it?”  They’ve answered, “Because I like doing it” or a similar statement and I’ve replied, “Well, there’s your answer to why I do it… and do you really believe that women are the only ones who not only suck cock but do it because they like/love doing it?”

And I guess that never occurs to some women, huh?  The thing is that guys who suck cock have something in common with women who suck cock and we do, in fact, do it for nearly identical reasons:  Out of obligation or expectations, because we like it, or because we absolutely love doing it and if some seed gets split, so much the better but if not, it was still a fun thing to do even if the recipient feels that not cumming didn’t make it fun for them.  In the case of good, bad, and who’s better, it’s about perspective more than anything else – what the giver’s purpose for sucking the dick is and what the receiver’s expectations are about the outcome of having their dick sucked.

There are reasons… valid reasons why some women aren’t the fans of it that some think they should be and any guy who sucks cock should know – or will eventually learn – why women behave they do about sucking dick, just like they should learn something about this thing we have in common with women and, yes, including how much some of us just love eating pussy and just like how many women love doing that as well.

And, once again, it all begins with why and, sadly, how this is usually ignored or not paid a lot of attention to; there’s the whole expectation thing that very much plays into the good, bad, and who’s better issue and if a giver somehow doesn’t meet a receiver’s expectations, a bad mark is gonna be issues for the man or woman performing the act.

Okay, I need to get to work on smothering some pork chops so I’ll leave y’all to think about this and if you have your own thoughts, well, speak up because one of the other determining factors in this whole frigging discussion is the fact that this is something we just do not ever wanna talk about and regardless to sexuality.

 
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Posted by on 4 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Who’s Better at It?

At some point, you just know that if you get a bunch of bi guys together, someone is gonna ask this question and the answers are pretty much predictable and along the lines of, “Only a man/woman knows what a man/woman wants!” when it comes to oral sex.

To me – and looking at the root of things – the more important question is, “How do you define ‘better’?”  I’m gonna give you a link to an article one of the fellas contributed on this very subject and I’d suggest that you all give it a read and see what went on to answer this question:  https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/mv3mzb/gays-v12n1

If and as you read this piece, keep in mind that this… experiment started with a stacked deck but, sure, even if you’re of a mind that gay stuff is yucky, this is worth the few minutes it’ll take you to read it.

Now some “facts” about giving head, starting with one of the most often stated reasons for a guy to let another guy suck his dick:  Women ain’t fond of doing it.  It’s a generalization, of course, because there are women who are not only fond of it, they are very damned good at it.  A lot of guys get miffed because a woman can “demand” that she get eaten – and she’s not talking about just a few token licks; no, she wants you to really get at her and pack a lunch because the longer you can provide her with oral pleasure, the happier she might be.  But, then, when homey is looking for her to return the favor, um, well, if it does get returned, a lot of guys say there’s not much in the way of enthusiasm.

One of the things I tell guys about sucking cock is that for one to understand why some women aren’t fans, um, go suck a guy’s dick and you’ll find out why a woman may have started out being a fan but, today, not so much.  Having said that, there are a lot of guys who wouldn’t suck a dick if you paid them to… but they are quick to provide some negative criticism for the person who took the time and effort to suck them and they didn’t get the result they were expecting.

Then again, some guys think that because they’ve had their dick sucked, they have some knowledge or expertise on how a dick should be sucked and that’s true… if the guy ever had dick in his own mouth; otherwise, what do they really know?

What defines being better?  Some guys define this as being made to cum and if the suckee doesn’t entice them to cum, bleh, the blow job wasn’t all that and regardless to how he might have been feeling – or was made to feel – before happy time failed to show up.  Some guys say that it’s all about technique; if you can suck a dick all the way down to the bone and keep your teeth out of the action, you might find yourself on the “better at it” side of this list.  Except, not everyone can deep throat a dick, right?  See, once again, I think a lot of guys watch cocks being sucked in porn and see both men and women making monstrously huge dicks disappear without a trace – or some poor cock sucker is being “forced” to make that huge dick disappear – and maybe they get the impression that this is the way a dick should be sucked and, gulp, getting someone to swallow the sword is easy to do.

What they kinda gloss over is that the people they’re watching go at the dick are “professionals” – they do this for a living and they’ve had a whole lot of practice and, yeah, you can watch some cock sucking scenes and you can tell that the person with the dick in their mouth is not having any fun at all… but it’s a paycheck.

So while technique can go a long way in this, I’m not of a mind that technique alone is – and should be – a determining factor when trying to flip that coin and saying who’s better at it.  You can have the best technique… but if your heart ain’t in it, your excellent technique doesn’t mean a whole lot.

Some guys say with great certainty that guys are better at it and because guys are usually very willing not only to suck that dick but to finish it off and as a matter of course.  And that’s fine… but doesn’t necessarily make men better at it – it just kinda proves that we’re more willing to do it and some guys who’ve never had a cock sucking experience with another guy will just assume that it’s true that only a man knows what a man wants… until he finally gets around to having a guy blow him because one of the important things is that you just might know how you’d want your dick sucked… but you’ll find out that you have no idea how the other guy will want his dick sucked unless he actually tells you which is a good thing… except for those guys who don’t like to be instructed in how to do something they think they know how to do.

Women will tell you that some guys aren’t very good at eating them because homey isn’t listening to them or paying attention to how their body reacts when he does – or doesn’t do – certain things and that same thing can be in effect when it’s guys sucking guys.

It’s to be noticed that while there are some people who are just “naturals” at sucking cock (and eating pussy), most people have to learn how to do it and, in my opinion, they also have to learn how to have it done to them.  One clear thing is that if you make it difficult for the giver to, um, give, chances are good you’re not gonna have a good oral experience.  Again, some guys watch porn and, I dunno, assume that face-fucking the shit out of the person giving them head is the way it should be done and that’s fine… if you happen to enjoy getting face-fucked in that rather brutal way.  There’s that natural or even automatic fucking motion that happens and it is a fairly good indicator that the person you’re going down on is enjoying what you’re doing… but guys should never assume that the person sucking their dick enjoys having their mouth and throat ravaged in the way porn likes to demonstrate these days.

So when the question of who’s better at it comes up, first, take a look at what your idea of better is as well as your idea of what bad is.  You have to look at every instance you’ve experienced and while you’re looking at how it was done, if you can, try to factor in the person doing it and if you note that for those “bad” moments the person going down on you didn’t seem to be having fun doing it, well, that should tell you something and it is quite possible that the reason why they’re not enjoying doing this to you could be your fault and not, as some tend to assume, the fault of some person in their past that made giving head a not-so-nice thing to do.

When guys hook up to suck cock, it is assumed that they know what they’re doing and what is expected of them… and ya might want to consider not assuming anything other than someone you’ve had no prior experience with is going to do their best to suck your dick and just as you’re gonna do your best to suck them.  While men seem to think that the goal of sucking a dick (or being sucked) is for them to bust a huge nut, well, they kinda miss the boat a little because one of the main “purposes” is to make it feel good for the recipient as well as the giver.  In other words, you don’t have to bust a humongous nut for a blow job to be good and I’ve always wondered if some guys even pay attention to the fact that while they’re having their cock sucked, they’re also experiencing orgasms… or are they like a lot of guys and think that busting a nut and having an orgasm is the same thing.

And it isn’t although they can both happen at the same time but this particular thing is a bit of a testimony of how much guys might not know about themselves or their body.  And if you eat pussy – and the person you’re eating is enjoying what you’re doing, maybe you’ll notice that a woman can have a lot of little orgasms and that they tend to pile up to, hopefully, become that toe-curling big one that many women want to experience and, oh, yeah, would you believe that some women don’t want to experience the big one because, for them, that’s pretty damned scary?  Weird but true.

One of the other things that play into the good and bad aspects of this is one’s expectations… and having them isn’t always a good thing because you’re expecting this or that and what’s actually happening is something other than what you were expecting.  If you’ve ever had a woman tell you – and as politely as she can manage – that you weren’t as good at eating her as she expected you to be, are you the reason why it wasn’t good… or did her expectations factor into a not-so-good pussy eating moment?

When considering whether the oral sex is good or bad – and who’s better – one should, I think, factor in many other things other than whether or not the end result was achieved up to and including how the person you’re having oral sex with is feeling, the time of day and even shit like the current weather conditions.  Then you have to also factor in how you’re feeling and what else has been affecting and impacting your day prior to the moment when mouths meet genitals.  Do you think such things don’t matter?  You’d be mistaken if you didn’t think they do.

The final piece to this is about desire and, at least in my opinion, one of the prime determining factors in any such discussion or as I’ve said here hundreds of times, it’s the difference between doing it out of a sense of obligation, liking to give head, and being mad-crazy in love with doing it; these things will directly affect the outcome and weigh in heavily in the debate of who’s better at it and then, when you combine levels of desire with technique, wow… just wow.

One must factor in how much effort it takes to suck cock/eat pussy and, just as important, how much time it can take to get the object of your oral lust screaming for someone to save them from your attempt to “murder” them with your mouth, tongue, and fingers.  It also matters whether or not you’re sucking that dick or eating that pussy as a prelude to fucking and one thing women knows about us guys is that if she’s sucking us and she entices us to cum, she’s not gonna get fucked – so she’s not gonna suck you with the purpose of making you bust that nut even though you probably wouldn’t mind if that did happen.  Women, I think, are different in this because they very well want to feel you inside them… but after you eat them senseless but, sure, sometimes they want you to eat them but not “murder” them while doing it – it’s really a matter of what’s wanted and needed, not that a lot of women would complain if you ate them senseless then fucked them, mind you.

And, oh, yeah, if you happen to be one of those people who are of a mind that someone going down on you doesn’t do a damned thing for you, um, it might not be them or what they’re doing that isn’t pushing your buttons; I’ve learned over all this time that if a person has already decided that this isn’t going to be good for them and ain’t gonna do a damned thing toward their pleasure, it’s not gonna happen and nothing the other person can do is going to matter.

And if you need your buttons pushed a certain way, um, why haven’t you told them where the buttons are, how to push them, and when to push them?  Perhaps you’d be surprised at how often this doesn’t happen, which usually results in a “bad” experience and can tilt the scales when deciding who’s better at it – and providing you’re someone who has experience giving and receiving in the dual mode of oral sexual pleasure.

There’s a reason why oral sex is considered an art and why I tend to say that anyone can fuck… but not everyone knows how to give head and, yeah, some folks don’t know how to receive head.  I’d ask you at this point to take a look at your own experiences giving and receiving head and, perhaps, you’ll see what I’m talking about in any of this.

Are women better at eating pussy?  Are men better at sucking cock?  You’d have to decide what “better” means to you as well as what constitutes good and bad when it comes to this; I’m just the guy who’ll tell you that there’s more to figuring this out than what you might think there is.

And, finally, there’s this little factoid:  If someone goes down on you – and regardless of the end results, uh, um, shouldn’t you be grateful that they’re willing to do this to and for you at all?

Think about it… and if you wanna share, feel free to do so.  One of the things that makes giving and receiving head an iffy thing to do is that like so many other things regarding sex, it’s something we don’t talk about and even with the person we might be involved with who gives us great head one day and lousy head the next… or it gets fixed in our minds that men are better at it or women are and without really understanding what the hell is really going on with this.

 
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Posted by on 2 October 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Continuing Interest?

There’s a dual purpose to today’s scribble.  One is to keep taking this new editor out for a spin and it immediately reminds me to let WordPress know that when you click Publish, it doesn’t do the somewhat inefficient spell check the old editor would do… that or I don’t know how to turn it back on.

Yesterday, during my first exposure to this new editor, as I shut things down, I noticed that TBT: Asking for a Bro Job slipped from the top spot on the Most Read list and its place taken by another scribble about M2M blow jobs.

Coincidence… or could it be that there are more people interested in why “Tommy” and “Eddie” would, out of the clear blue sky, decide that giving each other a blow job is just what the doctor ordered?  And, yeah, if you’re wondering, Tumblr is still presenting me with a lot of stuff featuring cock sucking and, this time, including women doing it.

I saw the change in Most Read and started thinking about it but decided to forego scribbling something until I had enough time to give this some “serious” thought.  I did, before shut down, go back and re-read the first scribble about this being a coincidence and, in particular, the part where the guy got surprised by a mouthful of cum; I’m sorry, that was just too precious and way too funny not to look at again.

Indeed, during the cleanup on Tumblr, I saw a few women get that surprised look on their face as the guy they were blowing unloaded but they were a lot more graceful about it than that guy was, hands down.  That aside – and as I went on about my day, I had M2M cock sucking churning away in the back of my mind and looking at as many aspects of it as I could think of up to and including the why of it all and beginning with trying to separate the chaff from the wheat or the reason why “Tommy” and “Eddie” would want to blow each other… and it’s not necessarily because they’re gay or bi.

The simplest reason is, um, because it feels good to do it and have it done to you.  The whole notion of the mystical bro job has taken down the barriers that have been erected (no pun) around this particular thing and, if nothing else, implies if not proves that you don’t have to be a gay man to suck a dick and while we tend to presume that a guy could very well be bisexual – and even if the guys involved swear to all that’s holy that they’re not bisexual.

In my head, I was “hearing” the sexual purists saying that if a guy wanted his dick sucked, he should go find a woman willing to do it and that “argument” was ancient the first time I heard it uttered (way back in the late 1960s) and my immediate and following thought was that whoever first said this obviously didn’t know shit about women and cock sucking because if they did, they wouldn’t have said such an idiotic thing, that and such a statement is still very deeply rooted that archaic way we tend to think about things sexual which, in and of itself, is continually being proven to be outdated, has more holes in it than a screen door as well as being flawed and in the worst ways imaginable.

As I laughed at having this ridiculous statement running around in my head, I thought about the other reasons why “Tommy” and “Eddie” could get into their heads to blow each other and while there are a ton of said reasons, again, I looked for the simplest one, that being that built-in imperative to have sex that is either a good thing for us or the bane of our existence, depending on how you wanna look at it.  I thought about a saying I heard back in the day:  Only a woman knows what a woman wants and not only does this seem to be a truism, I believe it to be the justification for women to chow down on each other and with impunity – no one really thinks this is unusual and given man’s track record with women and sex, well, it makes sense depending on one’s point of view.

I thought that if this is true for women, it’s also true for men; the logic, all by itself, is sound if you remove the ancient taboo attached to this and therein also lies the problem “Tommy” and “Eddie” are faced with because not many people can absent the taboo from their thinking and, as such, aren’t able to see the sense in, “If it’s good for the gander, it’s good for the goose… (and to butcher this saying a bit).

For men – and as I’ve written extensively about – cock sucking is a prime entry level to M2M activities; the only thing “easier” is giving each other a hand job.  It doesn’t require any preparation other than giving one’s crotch a good washing, can be done almost anywhere, and usually doesn’t take a whole lot of time.  If it’s true that there are more men getting into M2M stuff these days – and I believe that it is – well, this is the place where a lot of those guys like “Tommy” and “Eddie” will start and, yeah, what guy hasn’t ever given a single thought about what it would be like to do something that he’s had done to him (and if he was lucky enough to have a woman blow him)?  Not all guys do and not all guys would admit to having this thought – I’m just telling you that, yup, some (or many of us) do or did think this at some point in our lives.

With the incredible access to porn we have – and thanks to the Internet – you can see a whole lot of cock sucking and, well, damn – doesn’t it all look rather exciting?  Yeah, yeah – all of you experienced cock suckers just might have a different thought about that but I’m not talking about y’all; I’m still talking about why “Tommy” and “Eddie” could get it into their heads that blowing each other would be a fun thing to do.  It seems to me that our hypothetical guys could spend some times watching porn, seeing cocks being sucked and, again, get that fleeting thought in their head that says, “I wonder what it would be like to do that?”  The thought vanishes because something else in their head says, “That shit is gay and I’m not gay!”

And who says you have to be gay, hmm?  It’s at this point where some guys would think two things:  One, there’s no way in hell they’d find themselves in such a situation where they have a cock in their mouth… and, two, their imaginations start creating scenarios that could make such a thing jump of – but not that they’d actually do it, mind you, because it’s still gay and for the purpose of this discussion, “Tommy” or “Eddie” consider themselves to be quite straight and we can even go a bit further and imply that one or both are, at the least, bi-curious.

Shit lines up the right way at the right time – and there’s too many ways things can line up like this – and this is where things get to be funny because now one or both of these guys are trying to figure out how to kick start something that, for the both of them, is begging to be done and, no, I’m not sure I can really explain this other than to say that in that right way and time, the thing that “has to be done,” the thing that solves the immediate “problem” is for them to whip out their dicks, shake off any fear and reluctance, and suck each other off.

Yeah, it sounds crazy and it sounds even crazier because I don’t have the words to really explain how two guys can come to this conclusion in their minds and without saying anything to each other about it – yet.  You just know it and as I’ve written about before, wow, this is where things can get kinda hilarious to watch two guys dropping hints on each other about how much they wouldn’t mind a blow job right about now.  I’ve seen this situation too many times and one of two things happen:  Either nothing happens because both guys are too embarrassed or afraid to actually ask if this can happen between them… or someone says, “Fuck it!” and puts the offer out there.  At this point it could be rejected… but, I dunno, you’d have to be in one of those moments to know when it’ll be passed on and when passing on it isn’t the thing to do – again, it’s one of those things I don’t have the ability to explain and have it make sense.

That either guy might feel some kind of way after the fact is a different thing to be dealt with; it can make guys feel horribly and terribly guilty and on top of the fact that sucking each other off did, in fact, fit the bill rather nicely.  During the recovery phase, they might reaffirm that, um, just because we did this doesn’t mean we’re gay, right?  It also gets established – and sometimes for the second time – that neither guy is gonna let it be know that they did this to each other (“I won’t tell if you won’t, okay?)

If they survive this moment, it’s not a given that they’d go for it again somewhere down the road… but at the very least, they know that if they find themselves in need of release and they’re hanging out with each other, well, um, we did it before… so why can’t we do it again?

Why?  Because it feels good to do it and have it done and sexuality be damned.  Those of you who enjoy sucking on a hard one knows what I’m talking about and how personally satisfying it is and our boys “Tommy” and “Eddie” have also discovered this even though their minds are still having a battle over the matter and things are now in the realm of, “That was awesome… but it’s not something I’d want to do all of the time.”

Sure it isn’t, guys.  Guys find out that it’s “nasty” and “naughty” and that all by itself is quite the thrill as is looking down at who’s sucking on your dick, seeing it’s a guy – and a guy you know – and, wow, I don’t believe we’re really doing this.  Some guys do think, during the fact, “We shouldn’t be doing this…” but, ah, fuck, that thought doesn’t always bring things to a screeching halt because despite it not supposed to be happening like this, it sure as hell feels damned good.

Guys can conjure up a million reasons why engaging in some mutual cock sucking is a good thing to do.  Yes, guys do worry about being gay and they do worry about what someone else would say about them if what they did with another dude is discovered and, yes, some guys who wanna suck cock won’t do it because of these two things but I still wanna know how someone else is gonna find out that you did this unless you (or the other guy) lets it be known.

In any of this, maybe other folks are reading my scribbles about this and have their own thoughts about it or maybe, just maybe, they’re learning something they thought was just rumor, urban legend, whatever.  Again, guys have a million reasons for why they suck dick and the least of them is because it feels good.  It’s not always about acquiring the taste – one of the other things we tend to worry excessively about – but it is all about what they’re experiencing before any nut busting happens… unless you’re like that guy in the clip who got surprised – man, that was oh, so precious.

It’s not a thing of whether or not guys aren’t supposed to do this to each other – it’s a thing that some of us do and for whatever reason makes sense to us, from a facet of our sense of sexuality to the simple fact that we need to bust a nut and any way we can do that that doesn’t involve jerking off just works.  Some might turn their noses up at “Tommy” and “Eddie” and think all sorts of things about them – they’re freaks, gay, nasty-assed motherfuckers and even soulless, godless heathens – but I wonder if anyone ever thinks that our hypothetical boys are sucking the living daylights out of each other simply to satisfy a need and one that won’t wait for someone else – traditionally a woman – to do it.

Finally – and I know y’all were wondering when I was gonna get done with this – this new editor, well, I guess it serves the purpose although for me, it’s a bit distracting because as I type, I can see things flashing in the upper right corner as what I’m typing gets auto-saved and despite having my eyes on what I’m typing – that peripheral vision thing.  I can live with this new thingy but I really do wish WordPress would put back the ability to fully justify whatever text you’re scribbling because it just looks… neater – something about those ragged edges just kinda offends me a little and because, over the years, I’ve gotten used to full text justification with hyphenation – yeah, Word (and even WordPerfect) just totally and completely spoiled the shit out of me.

So now I gotta figure out how to send WordPress my observations of this new editor to date… wish me luck.

 
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Posted by on 14 September 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: A Coincidence? Maybe… or Maybe Not

First – and to make this scribble make more sense – I noticed that “TBT:  Asking For a Bro Job” is still sitting at the top of my Most Viewed list.  What got my attention wasn’t the fact that it’s still there but since it’s been there, whenever I hit my Tumblr account to keep fighting the battle of encroaching spam, I’ve seeing a lot of clips of guys blowing each other as well as those clips with a caption of this happening with a guy’s straight friend.  Perhaps it’s not as much of a coincidence as it might seem to me but it did get my attention in any event.

As I opened a blank post to start writing this, my brain called up a recently seen “example” of this probable coincidence and the clip was short and to the point and, thanks to my sense of humor, kinda funny.  The scene opens up to a guy who may or may not be a twink sucking on another guy’s prick (and you don’t see his face but that’s about par for the course); the guy’s working on the dick – then you see his cheeks suddenly puff out and a look of surprise is on his face and I thought, “Ha, that dude just came in his mouth!”  Now, there’s no way of knowing whether the guy doing the sucking had agreed to this or not but it’s clear that, um, he wasn’t expecting it at that particular moment.

The guy lifts his head, his lips part, and a good-sized dribble of spunk escapes – and homey is looking at the unseen guy in a way that might be interpreted as, “Dude!  I don’t fucking believe you just did that!”  I actually sat and watched the clip a couple of times because I wanted to see that look on his face again (and again) and the way his cheeks puffed out like a squirrel storing nuts in its mouth… and this analogy is rather appropriate.  I had another good chuckle and continued on searching for spam.  During the search and removal process, I saw maybe 15-20 more clips of guys sucking cock and not all with that, um, surprise.  That the clips were shot in different place – indoors, outdoors, in a car, one with a guy getting buffed on a bus – that was pretty fucking nervy – as well as glory holes and what appeared to be public bathrooms and with the action taking place under the stall dividers.

At the time, I didn’t connect any of this with my scribble about bro jobs but I did note that, man, there’s a lot of cock sucking happening here today.  As I said, seeing what was still at the top of my list did make the connection and not only does this dovetail with my futile efforts to keep my Tumblr account spam free, but a lot of guys on the forum are talking about blow jobs as well as bro jobs, too.  Coincidence?  Maybe… or maybe not.  Quite some time ago, Cityman and I were talking about what M2M thing a guy new to this is more likely to do and I told him that in my experience, most new guys will want to give sucking a dick a try more than finding out whether or not it’s really true that if something big can come out of there, something big can go back in there.  We got into talking about tops and bottoms and the “mandatory” behaviors involved in these roles and while he, for a moment, felt that fucking is the thing a new guy is more likely to do, I pointed out that while some guys do get right to that their first time, nah, that’s more of an exception than the rule, that and some guys become tops because they’ve tried sucking a dick, found it not to their liking, so to “get out of” sucking dick going forward, they become “tops” because everyone knows that if you’re the one doing the ass fucking, that’s not really gay.

If you happen to believe that, perhaps I can interest you in some prime real estate in the Mohave Desert that would be great place to build a new version of Las Vegas – I can make you a really good deal on it.

In past scribbles, I’ve talked about the entry point for most new guys and what appears to be a logical progression.  Some guys start out with sharing hand jobs, which can progress into cock sucking; some guys stop right there while some go on to the next step in the progression, putting cock into ass.  True enough – and as I said just a bit earlier – some guys want to jump the line and get poked, not really bypassing sucking on some dick but they’ll do that as a prerequisite – or precursor – to getting poked… and I don’t pretend to understand how a new guy can come to the conclusion that getting poked is the thing they want to do above all else – I just know that some guys take this, ah, shortcut.

I’m sitting there thinking about the progression as I’m typing and that clip I mentioned back in the beginning of this comes to mind and how some guys do get surprised by finding something warm and salty in their mouth and even though, starting out, the new guy just might make a statement about this being very new to him and unloading in his mouth isn’t on his agenda at this stage of things… and I still think that such guys aren’t really thinking about the fact that expecting a guy to keep that promise is iffy, at best.  You kinda/sorta expect him to have some very masterful control and in the face of what your inexperienced mouth is doing toward making him feel very wonderful so, um, yeah, at some point, he’s gonna feel so wonderful that he’ll find himself getting shoved over the edge of the cliff – and even though they, too, aren’t expecting it.

The result is almost exactly as I described in the clip – cheeks suddenly puff out in response to having your mouth unloaded into and that surprised look is genuinely a part of that unexpected – or unwanted? – moment.  And I think, “If you keep sucking a guy’s cock long enough and in the right way, damn, what do you think is gonna happen?”  The funny thing is that you’d think a guy would be very much aware of this and I’ve often wondered why it seems that they aren’t aware of this.  Sometimes, I think some guys have it firmly in their head (no, this isn’t a pun at all) that this is what they want to do and this is what they expect to happen and, again, not even understanding that this expectation – or set of expectations – are a bit unrealistic or just because you don’t wanna wind up doing an instant acquisition of the taste doesn’t mean shit.  Sometimes I think new cock suckers are overly influenced by porn; they see a guy being blown for a very long period of time before he pulls out of the mouth servicing him and spills all over the place, never once considering that the majority of the cock sucking stuff they’re looking at is heavily edited and even edited out of sequence – and these days, the video editing tools available to those who seek to create their own “amateur” versions of porn can slice and dice a cock sucking scene so that they can get it to look like anything they want to… which isn’t always in line with the reality of things, oh, like the guy being sucked is pretty damned sure that he’ll be able to last a long time under some pretty intense sucking, only to get surprised less than a minute later and find themselves spilling the milk.

But not as surprised at the guy on the receiving end of it, huh?  Again, dude, what did you think was gonna happen and didn’t you consider that it could happen at any time and without warning?

The last clip I saw before I gave up trying to eradicate the spam actually had subtitles!   A closeup shot shows a guy on his knees (and you can easily tell that he was), holding a hard dick in one hand and looking up at its owner and saying, “Dude, this is my first time doing this, okay?”   The other guy said, “It’ll be okay – just do it!”  The sucking commences, very tentative at first but it’s clear homey is getting into it when the guy being sucked grabs the sucker’s head and rams all of his dick into the other guy’s mouth.  The dude’s eyes flew open, his cheeks are bulging – not because he got that creamy surprised but as an automatic reaction to suddenly finding your mouth too full of something.  You can see the guy trying to pull back but his head is being held onto too tightly and now you can see the panic starting to set in just by the look on his face and,  uh, um, how red the cock sucker’s face is getting.  The dude doing the head holding is buried nuts-deep in this guy’s mouth for a long time before he finally lets go; the guy who was just struggling with this a moment ago was, in my opinion, seconds from barfing all over the place and the look he gave the other guy?  As they say, if looks could kill…

“Dude, what the fuck are you doing?” the cock sucker asked and his anger is quite plain to see.

“Shut up and suck my dick, bitch,” came the reply… and the hapless cock sucker did, in fact, shut up and continued to get his mouth abused; that all by itself told me that this “I’m new to this” thing was sheer fabrication and ended, as some of these things tend to do, with the cock sucker on his knees, his mouth open, his eyes locked onto the other guy and even with a look of pleading or expectation as the cock owner pulls his pud and unloads what I thought was a pitiful amount of spunk onto the other guy’s tongue.

In a real life situation, that cock sucking adventure would have come to an abrupt end and a scene of a fight would take its place although I gotta say that there are a lot of newbie cock suckers who want to get choked by a big dick being jammed into their mouth and throat… and I’ll be damned if I know why.

As mentioned, I’m not sure if my bro job scribble and the other stuff I’ve been reading and seeing is simply pure coincidence or not but I do find it rather odd that I’m seeing it.  That there are a lot of guys interested in sucking dick doesn’t surprise me; that some of these guys wanna suck dick but, er, not deal with the consequences of their actions also doesn’t surprise me a whole lot nor does it surprise me that guys who have never sucked a cock are saying that they very much want to acquire the taste and none of this surprises me because I know that sucking cock is a prime entry-level into the world of M2M.  Indeed, many guys will go this route because – and get this – it’s the least gay thing two guys can do (yep, sure it’s not all that gay…); it’s still one of the things two guys can do that doesn’t require any preparation before the fact and, depending on the guys involved, isn’t going to take a whole lot of time to make someone bust – anywhere between 30 seconds and 30 minutes if they jerked off before they met to do this.  It’s something that can be done almost anywhere and you don’t even have to get fully undressed to get it going.  Clean up, well, that can differ depending on the mindset of the guys involved and, um, the best way to get rid of any evidence is to swallow it or even spit it out; taking a nut in the face is, strangely, appealing to some guys and will call for being able to wash one’s face and, um, they could miss a spot of jizz – “Dude, do I have any on my face anywhere?”  “Nah, man – you’re good!”

Then homey goes somewhere else and someone asks him, “Hey… what’s that in your hair (or some other place you didn’t know about)?”

Oops.

I’ve made it a point to take note of what Tumblr shows me when I go in to do my clean up; I’ve already seen the guys on the forum talking about cock sucking which, again, isn’t all that unusual because for some men, it’s a very attractive and exciting thing to do… I’m just on the fence about whether seeing all of this is a coincidence or not…

 
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Posted by on 7 September 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: Checking the Pulse of the Dynamic

I know I’m starting to sound like a broken record but I very much enjoy going to the bi guy forum to read not only what the guys might be doing but what they’re thinking and this week, their minds have been on cock sucking which, all by itself, isn’t unusual.  Topics about this run the gamut of questions, like, what’s the best size of dick to suck or how to deep throat a dick to even whether or not pubic hair is a cock sucking deal breaker or not.

Yeah… do you remember me telling you how funny guys are about these things?  You do?  Okay, just making sure.

Now, while guys are generally “afraid” of sucking a dick because they believe that the moment their lips touch one, they’re gonna get fatally infected with something, the thing that tends to amaze me and gets my eyes rolling is that a lot of guys seem to be more worried about the other guy cumming in their mouth than anything else.  From my perspective, this particular thing is getting a lot more attention than any time in the past that I’ve observed; back in the day, guys who wanted to suck dick worried about being gay but if they got over this and sucked a dick – and got a mouthful of spunk, eh, that’s just part of the deal – just let me know before you do it, okay?  Indeed it is considered proper etiquette to give a warning before exploding but it also makes sense to get this on the table and discussed before the dicks come out and more so since many men assume that if you suck cock, you’re gonna swallow the results of your efforts.

To that end – and I’m not sure why – some guys doing this for the first time often forget to mention that it’s their first time and then find themselves surprised to, ah, find something in their mouth other than their own saliva – and then they get grossed out, angry, or both.  Some guys do get it out before the fact and the other guy will say that he’ll give the warning so the sucking can stop and I’d never say that this never happens because it does… but sometimes, um, it can happen so quickly that the guy being sucked can’t speak English in that surprising moment so the warning goes by the wayside… and guys get pissed off behind it.

In a way, it’s kinda sad to see how many men don’t really understand how their bodies work in this regard, just like they don’t seem to understand that while it’s nice – and often required and demanded – that we hold back that nut for as long as humanly possible, sometimes, it just doesn’t work that way and there are a lot of factors that play into this that I’m not gonna bother to get into because I wanna scribble about how “afraid” budding cock suckers are of getting a mouthful of cum.  A million times yes – we all know about the acquired taste thing but having cum in your mouth isn’t always about the actual taste – it’s also about the consistency.  As a bit of an aside, it’s always kinda cracked me up to know of guys who can slurp down a raw oyster on the half shell without giving it a second thought… but the thought of catching a mouthful of spunk just freaks them out.

Simply amazing.

Yesterday, I sat and read a lot of guys talking about taking that nut to the head and while there were guys who said that this was the best part of the whole cock sucking experience, it was the guys who were kinda whistling in the dark and saying that, on the one hand, they’d give just about anything to suck a dick for the first time… but they wouldn’t want the other guy to nut in their mouth.  Now, I know that some of this “fear” is borne out of hearing and giving much weight to others who’ve said that they’ve had it happen and it was the worst thing they’ve ever experienced and the nastiest thing they’ve ever put in their mouth.  So they actually don’t know whether or not it’s gonna taste as badly as has been reported or not and because of this, so many potential cock suckers are always looking for ways to avoid having to taste it and you can tell who those guys are because they tend to say that they wanna suck a nice big dick… and have the guy cum all over their face, chest, whatever.   During the discussion, I got the impression that some of the participants haven’t sucked a dick because they know what might happen and they are, predictably, uncertain what that moment is going to be like; again, you can listen to other people talk about being in that moment and get their take on it… just ain’t never the same as experiencing it for themselves and I’ll say this part again:  Guys seem to be more worried about what it’s gonna taste like than they do anything else.

One guy shared that he sucked cock for the first time and got surprised when the guy suddenly unloaded and without warning, something he wasn’t happy about and I found myself thinking, “I don’t know why you got pissed about it – if you suck a dick in just the right way, what do you think is gonna happen… and if you think that the other guy is going to have the presence of mind to shout out a warning, how is it that you, being a guy and all that, don’t know how busting a nut can be so overwhelming that you might kinda stop breathing, let alone be able to say anything at all?”

The guy admitted that while he got surprised – and the other guy was just as surprised – and while he was angry over it, um, it didn’t taste as bad as he thought it would but I got the impression that his experience was less than stellar.  I can understand why some women won’t suck a guy off; it’s not only the acquired taste thing but getting sucked off tends to take us right out of the game and unable to fuck them and some women have learned that despite the iron control they’d prefer us to have, um, sometimes it just doesn’t go like that so to avoid the taste and not being able to get screwed, they’ll suck us to a point, stop, and wait for us to get in there.

Fine – it just is what it is.  However, in the world of M2M, one expectation is that you do suck cock – even though a lot of guys can’t and won’t; the other is that if you do suck cock – and there’s no fucking on the menu – then you’re doing it for the express purpose of making the other guy cum and when he does, swallowing is preferred, letting it happen in your mouth and spitting it out is okay, too.  I sit and read what these guys are saying and thinking and I can’t help it:  I almost always think, “What do you guys think is gonna happen when you suck a guy’s dick?” and more so when a lot of these same guys want to experience what it’s like to make another guy crack his nuts wide open, which I completely understand… but, um, sometimes, the fruits of your labor just might wind up in your mouth and sometimes you’ll have no verbal warning even if the other guy, in good faith, intends to warn you.

If you do get a warning, there’s no telling how much time you have to get your mouth off of the dick; maybe you have a minute, maybe the warning comes a scant few seconds before eruption takes place.  Hell, some guys are even surprised that they can bust a nut from getting sucked in the first place; I’ve personally heard a lot of guys say, “I can’t cum like that…” and, thirty seconds later, Mount Penis is boiling over big time; it’s not that big of a deal, not if you understand that such things can happen… and, really, if you’re not willing to deal with the taste and the consistency – on purpose or accidentally, why exactly are you wanting to suck dick in the first place?  One should always keep in mind that a lot of guys get into M2M cock sucking because chances are damned good that they’re gonna get sucked off and, often, as a matter of course.

And, somehow, it kinda/sorta doesn’t make sense to me that a guy is aware of this (and a few other things) and be, um, timid about getting a mouthful.  A lot of guys ask what they should do if/when a guy cums in their mouth – and should they be worried about an STD and I tell them that in the statistically slight chance that this does happen, it’ll happen way before the guy even gets close to busting a nut.  I’ll even explain a few things about sucking dick and, specifically, the job saliva has other than keeping your mouth moist… yet, many guys persist in being “afraid” of getting a mouthful of spunk and I’ll eventually tell them that if you are really that concerned about it, never, ever, suck a dick that’s not fully wrapped up in a condom… or don’t suck cock at all.

Duh.  Did I mention how funny guys are about this?  I did?  Oh, okay…

Here’s the question, friends:  Why suck cock?  Simply, because it feels good to do it and I’m not just talking about the how the guy on the other end is feeling.  It’s pretty damned intimate even though many people feel that it isn’t and they don’t even consider it being sex – but we’re not talking about them.  You have to know that if you suck a guy’s dick long enough and in what turns out to be just the right way for him, you’re gonna make him cum and whether he wants to or not and just as you should damned well know what’s gonna come out of him when he does cum.  It’s either gonna be a little or a lot; it’s either gonna taste funny or it isn’t; he’s either gonna be able to give you enough advanced warning so you can back off or his brain is gonna be so scrambled that he doesn’t know his own name, let alone be able to give you the promised warning.  If you pay attention to the dick in your mouth and hand, a lot of guys’ junk will give off warning signs of a pending eruption – and some guys’ junk won’t give a warning at all.  If you feel his cock getting bigger and feel rapid quivers racing along his shaft, he’s close to getting shoved over the cliff and this is the time to stop sucking him and use your hand to get him off… but if he’s one of those guys without that built-in warning system, well. unless he can warn you, you’re gonna get a mouthful of cum and, at that point, you have some choices and very tiny slices of time to act on them.

At the first spurt, just take the dick out of your mouth – and you can do that at any point during his release.  Sometimes, you wind up swallowing it purely out of self-defense, as it were; you have “too much dick” in your mouth at that moment and he’s pumping it in and your body’s natural reactions will kick in so you can keep doing that very necessary breathing thing; if it tastes horrible, you’re gonna spit it out but if it happens and you don’t taste it, reflex will “make” you swallow it and, sometimes, before you’re even aware of doing it – and the taste might catch up with you or it won’t.  Or, as previously mentioned, if the idea of swallowing or even tasting another man’s seed just flat-out scares the shit out of you, wrap it in a condom before you suck it… or don’t suck cock at all.

Back in the day, those of us who sucked cock took getting a mouthful of nut as a given; at some point, it’s gonna happen and, really, the reason why you’re sucking dick is because he wants to cum and you’re doing your level best to help him achieve this goal.  We knew two things:  Either swallow it (and bitch about the taste afterward) or spit it out (and bitch about the taste later).  Sucking cock is not a “spectator sport” and it has a main goal kind of purpose outside of making the other guy feel good or as a precursor to getting fucked:  It’s to make him cum and if it happens to happen in your mouth, it’s part of the deal. If you rely on him giving you a warning or keeping his word that he’s not gonna cut loose in your mouth, well, I’d say that’s a mistake if you believe it’s gonna turn out that way; sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t and now it’s up to you to decide what you’re gonna do when you find you have a mouthful of spunk.

I just don’t know what guys these days are thinking about when it comes to this – and the pun is intended for a change.  I know guys watch M2M porn and watching a guy sucking dick can be pretty exciting to watch but, in the majority of times, when the guy being sucked is about to cum, you see him snatch his dick away, wrap his hand around it, and jerk himself off and the cum might go onto the other guy’s tongue or in his face or even just kinda dribbles out and landing wherever and, I dunno, maybe guys get it into their head (no pun this time) that this is how cock sucking is supposed to go.

I’m here to tell you that, nope, it really isn’t and the thing these days is that if you’re afraid of the spunk, um, your “manliness” could be called into question.  Like I said in the opening, the assumption and expectation is that if you suck cock, you don’t have an issue dealing with the results; I’ve been negotiating with guys and one of the first things they want to know, once you confirm that you do, indeed, suck cock is whether you swallow or not.  I’ve seen that if you do, negotiations continue… and if you don’t, the negotiations can come (still not a pun) to a screeching halt.  It is to note that guys who aren’t of a mind to get a mouthful of your nut will make it clear that they don’t suck dick so don’t even ask them to blow you; true enough, some dudes think it’s just too gay to suck a dick but their real fear is that they don’t wanna wind up with a mouthful of stuff and the best way to avoid it is to never suck a dick.

Period.  Look, I understand all too well how much courage it takes for a man to put his mouth on another man’s dick – looks easy, is anything but easy.  If a guy has the courage to blow another guy, you kinda have to ask if it makes sense to carry a fear of sperm in your mind.  The “I might catch something” thing is understandable and even the CDC says there’s a four percent chance of that actually happening which, in the grand scheme of things, is almost non-existent in the numbers game (please don’t get me started on statistical analysis).  If you’re worried about that, two choices again:  Use condoms or don’t suck dick.  Simple.  If you’re worried about whether or not you can acquire the taste or you’ve listened to the horror stories and believe them to be the whole truth of cock sucking, use a condom or don’t suck dick.

But if you choose to suck dick, damn, unless you’re paying very close attention, at some point, you’re gonna make him cum – and it just might happen within the warm, moist confines of your mouth.  Maybe he’ll warn you in time for you to stop sucking, maybe he won’t be able to… but if you do this and act as if it can’t happen, even accidentally, I beg you to reconsider such thoughts.  Way back when, a guy was very eager to blow me and he made that quite clear… right along with saying, “But don’t bust a nut in my head, okay?”  And I told him, truthfully, that chances are good that I might not be able to stop that from happening because while we’d love to think that we have complete and ironclad control over when we cum, uh, um, sometimes that sense of control is merely an illusion.

I asked him that if he had a problem with that, why does he suck dick in the first place?  He shrugged and said, “I just don’t like the way it tastes so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t bust in my head.”  Again, I felt that the chances were good that I might not be able to prevent that from happening because, hell, I’ve been surprised before, thinking that my control was fairly decent only to have the guy sucking me wrench that control from my grasp and in a damned hurry.  And, yes, they’ve been miffed and I’ve even apologized but, again, when you suck a man’s cock, just what do you really think is gonna happen eventually?

And if you’re not prepared to deal with that eventuality, why are you sucking dick?  I try to keep my finger on the pulse of the dynamic as best I can and think about the differences between what guys are thinking about and doing now as opposed to the way guys were going about this in the past – and I think it’s important to understand this because it’s not always about what a guy may or may not do – it always comes down to the why he does a thing or won’t do it and this “fear” of sperm is one of those things in the dynamic that is becoming quite apparent.

I might have something more on this later; there’s something else rattling around inside my head and only time will tell if it’ll shake itself loose…

 
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Posted by on 31 August 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: If You Don’t Really Wanna Know…

…don’t ask. Here’s yet another example of how my mind just seems to connect dots without being prodded to do so.

I was on my Dashboard after checking out the reader; my eyes flick over the information displayed and I saw that TBT: Asking for a Bro-job is still sitting in the most read position. My eyes relay this to my brain, my brain thought that guys sucking each other off must still be of some kind of interest… and then it thought about the many people who, for whatever reason, get blown away at the thought that guys do this to and for each other and get prompted to ask why.

And that turned into the title of this impromptu scribble: If you really don’t wanna know, don’t ask. I also recalled the first time I heard this exact phase/statement, uttered by my late paternal grandfather in response to a question a relative asked him during a kind of family reunion; I don’t remember the question but the response he gave has managed to stick with me over all of these years.

My brain asked, “Why do some people ask questions that they don’t wanna hear the answer to?” and, well, people just do that and find, as Jack Nicholson said in “A Few Good Men,” “You want the truth? You can’t handle the truth!”

My brain then cued up almost every conversation I’ve had about someone asking me why I suck dick and it’s not so much that the question gets asked but a matter of how they react once – and if – I answer… and if you’re thinking that their reaction isn’t a good one, you’d be right, up to and including being seriously offended.

If you don’t learn anything else from such conversations, you learn that trying to explain the logic of a situation doesn’t stand a snowball’s chance in Hell against someone’s emotional reaction; someone asks why, you explain it as best as you can – some of the answer is couched in terms for which there are no words in any language – and you can look at them and tell that it goes right over their head and is confirmed when you ask them if they understood what you just told them and they say, “Yeah, but…” or, worse, “No – I don’t get it…”

When having this conversation with some women, you will learn that, somehow, this… nasty habit you have has everything to do with them and I’m guessing – and have always guessed – that your explanation as to why just doesn’t make any sense so the “real reason” you’re doing this because of a lot of negative feelings about them – you don’t like, care for, or love them, you most certainly don’t like or love having sex with them (if you are having sex with them) and, most of all, you are blatantly and maliciously unconcerned about their feelings.

Wait… how did this conversation go from being about something I’m doing (or did or maybe even want to do) and why to being all about you? And if you’re so terribly grossed out or otherwise offended, tell me again why you asked me a question you didn’t want to hear the answer to? And, if you didn’t like the answer – and it’s obvious that you don’t – why are you pissed with me?

It never fails to amaze me how the human brain can just do stuff like this and especially when there doesn’t seem to be a reason to be doing it, like, you were actually thinking about something and now you need to think more about it.

I read about guys coming out to people and being asked why they feel the need to suck a dick and it just seems to escape people that, um, sucking cock makes them feel good or, as I asked a woman who has asked me why, “Well, why do you suck dick?”

She replied, “Because I like doing it!” – and it just went right past her that she answered her own question… and all I did was give her a look, you know the one where you raise both eyebrows in that way that says, “You get it, don’t you?”

Apparently not. It’s even “funnier” when having this conversation with another guy and more so when there aren’t too many men who don’t know that there are guys who love to suck cock and many of them also know that you don’t have to be gay to do it. You can’t just tell them that you like/love doing it; you can’t tell them how good it makes you feel to do it or how much you like making the other guy feel good even when it’s a sure bet that he knows how good it feels to have his cock sucked.

Intelligently, sure – it makes sense that women aren’t the only ones who suck cock, you know, since they’re aware that men do this as well… but you can look at the other guy and see a huge disconnect taking place inside his head and maybe it’s because it’s one thing to know that there are guys who do this, something else to actually know someone who does.

One usual and typical response: “Man, I couldn’t do some shit like that!” and, again, just how did this become a conversation about what you wouldn’t or couldn’t do? I’ve even listened to guys say they couldn’t or wouldn’t… then launch into possible scenarios that could possibly find them with a dick in their mouth.

Some guys just might ask, “Are you gay?” and you can tell them with a high degree of certainty that you are not gay… and, somehow, they can’t seem to believe you’re not gay. Wait… if you believe that I do, in fact, suck cock, why can’t you believe that I’m not gay?

Simply fascinating how the minds of others work, isn’t it? I’ve even had this conversation with guys and one of the things the say is to not ask them if I can blow them or ask if I’m thinking about asking them. Um, no – you asked a question and I’m answering it, nothing more, nothing less… this ain’t about you but you’ve now made this about you.

People who ask the question are usually offended, disgusted or otherwise feeling some kind of way about a question they asked… and maybe they shouldn’t have asked at all… and, of course, because you answered the question truthfully, it’s your fault that they’re feeling the way the do upon hearing the answer.

It has taught me a very valuable lesson: If I wanna ask someone a question – any question about anything – the first thing I ask myself is do I really wanna know? Yep, sometimes I need to know but sometimes, nah, I really don’t because like most people, I kinda don’t like hearing answers I wind up not liking – such things tend to ruin ones day and mood, depending on the question being asked and the subsequent answer.

But how my brain got onto this track is probably something I can’t answer… and chances are good I probably really don’t wanna know the answer.

 
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Posted by on 29 August 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: “I’m Not Gay, But…”

The source of this scribble comes from an odd place:  An email I got from “that site” I like to riff about from time to time.  Since I’m a member, I get emails from the site kinda regularly and, most of the time, I don’t even read them; I’ll glance at it, delete it, move on to the next email.  However, the one I got today got my attention even though I’ll admit to not reading the whole email.  The banner said, “I’m not gay, but every now and then I like to have my dick sucked by a guy!”

I saw this and my first thought was, “Who says you have to be gay for this to happen?  Hah, haven’t you heard of bisexuality and bro-jobs?”

My second thought was, “I wonder if there are a lot of guys who’d unlimber their cock for a good sucking by a guy but they’re still worrying about being seen as gay if they did?”  The question is rhetorical because, sure, there are an untold number of guys whose only reason for not experiencing an M2M blow job is that this is something still largely associated with gay men.

My third thought, generated as I opened WordPress to write this and to see what’s going on in here today, was actually me laughing silently thinking about this; ah, man, some guys can just be pretty clueless at times.

My fourth thought was, “I wonder if some guys who fall into this category think that a bro-job is some new and trendy thing… or are they beginning to see the light in that dudes do suck each other’s cocks and they’re not gay?”  Not so rhetorical a question because it could be both things and both could be attributed to the “fact” that a lot of guys suck cock and will tell you in a flat, skinny second that they’re not gay… and they’re not bisexual either.  I got to this part of my thinking and was reminded of a guy I knew who, when swinging with his wife, would routinely suck cock and get fucked in da butt… and fiercely denied that he was bisexual and used the “excuse” of playing D/s games and under the “I was just following orders!” thing.  Yeah, right – sure you were…  After a lot of discussion – and in between him saying that he never returned any favors to the other guy, he broke down and admitted that even though he did this under whatever D/s rules he and his wife had, um, he went along with it because, ah, he loved sucking cock and taking it in the ass because he was, indeed and in fact, bisexual.

Getting a “straight” guy who’s into cock sucking to admit that he’s bisexual might be likened to trying to pet a hungry tiger – you can do it but at great risk – but stuff like this makes me think more about what guys are thinking when it comes to this and, importantly, what methods of justification they use to tell themselves that, okay, I know I’m not gay… but when a dude sucks my dick, it sure as hell feels good.  Which, of course, it does… but that’s not the point.  I know that some guys are into this up to their eyeballs and the justification used is that if he never returns the favor, it’s not gay at all; it’s the same justification I’ve heard some guys use when their woman accuses them of cheating on her and he says, “I didn’t fuck her – she just sucked my dick!” and as if getting your dick sucked isn’t sex.

Hmm, let’s see… we know that if Guy A blows Guy B – and whether or not Guy B returns the favor – it’s long since been established that this is homosexual sex and even if there’s no fucking involved.  To one extent and given the raft of shit gay men have gone through in the past, it kinda makes sense that putting some distance between themselves and true gay men is a bit warranted…doesn’t make the act any less “gay,” though – it just is what it’s always been.  Humans are amazing creatures in that all we have to do is think that what we’re actually doing is somehow different from what’s really going on to effectively deny that if you look like a duck and quack like a duck, you’re really anything other than a duck.  In the sexuality world, it’s no secret that bisexuals are said to be in abject denial about really being gay… and, no, it’s not just gay folks saying this and one of the reasons why this accusation of denial even exists is because there are still a whole lot of people in the world who think – and incorrectly so – that you’re either straight or you’re gay.  Thus, Guys A and B can, for whatever reason works for them, can find themselves heavily engaged in a cock sucking frenzy and the perception is that they must be gay; if a more open-minded observer is aware of this, okay, they could be bisexual or, if one’s mind is a lot more open, eh, they’re just two guys who know and understand that getting your dick sucked not only feels pretty damned good but isn’t necessarily sexuality-specific given that one does not have to be gay or bi to suck a dick (or to eat a pussy if the discussion is about Gal A and Gal B as well as including women in this discussion for a moment).

What is a bit bothersome is that the perception of two guys blowing the living daylights out of each other is a purely gay thing to do; it implies and even insists that if Guys A and B are doing this, they have to be gay because only gay men do this to each other.  As always, the truth is very different – did ya know there are some gay men who wouldn’t suck a dick even if you put a gun to their head?  Well, wait… maybe they would but it’s an indication of what someone would have to do in order to entice them to do it.  These days, a lot of men (in particular) aren’t fans of being labeled as bisexual; they look like a duck, quack like a duck, but are really a cat – anything other than the duck they’re behaving like.  Oh, they don’t deny that they love to suck cock or are into the anal thing; they don’t really deny that they’re bisexual – they just don’t like being tagged as a bisexual because, somehow, this is offensive to them.  Yes:  Anyone can think of themselves in any way that works for them… but if you think that this kind of mental fencing sounds a bit cray-cray, I’d say that you’re right – it is… but what you’re seeing and hearing about this is how the human mind goes about justifying what its owner is doing so that whatever the owner is doing isn’t what it really is.

I don’t say that labels are bad in that sense; while we can and have used labels in some pretty offending ways, humans have this need to be able to identify their environment and we couldn’t interact with our environment without being able to do this and the simplest example of this are traffic lights:  We establish and define that red means stop, yellow means proceed with caution, and green means go and without these labels, well, you can imagine the problem in not knowing that red means stop.  In sexuality terms there are at least three things you can be, depending on who you’re talking to:  Heterosexual, bisexual, homosexual and these three things have their own criteria attached to their nomenclature and, again simply, opposite sex, both sexes, same sex.  The thing is that we know this and that includes all those folks who say that bisexuals and bisexuality doesn’t exist (otherwise, what the fuck are you riffing about?) but, jeez, I guess we really wouldn’t be so human if we didn’t slice and dice these things to fit our perception of ourselves, would we?

Getting your dick sucked (or your pussy eaten) doesn’t mean that you’re gay… it might not – and depending on how you think – mean that you’re bi; what it does mean is that, ah, when it comes to sexual pleasures, you’d not object a whole lot of the person sucking your dick (or eating your pussy) happens to be of the same sex as you are because regardless of this, having this done produces some rather satisfying results.  It’s not really a matter of it being better to give than receive – that’s just a person preference – but given the three states of sexuality (and, again, depending on who you’re talking to), well, you’re gonna fit into one of them and, get this:  If it’s true that actions speak louder than words – and a lot of people accept this as a truism and a matter of fact – then how can you be someone who has sex with both men and women and not be bisexual and because you say you aren’t?

At the end of the day, it really doesn’t matter what you think; I’m just the guy who’ll tell you that if you like exchanging blow jobs with another guy, you don’t have to be gay to do it and if you wanna think that you’re not bisexual, that’s okay, too, but, sure, if you wanna, go suck a dick and get yours sucked and, yeah, go eat some pussy and get yours eaten if it makes ya feel good!

 

 
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Posted by on 18 August 2018 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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