Nope, not talking about hitting the gym and not really talking about polishing something into dazzling, blinding brilliance. This is a scribble about sucking dick but it’s not a “how-to” either. I was cleaning out the bullshit from my Tumblr account and one of the first things I saw was a Tumblr thread that I do subscribe to and a clip of two guys outside somewhere, a hard dick being produced by one guy and the second guy kneeling to, um, buff that dome. I watched with my usual clinical detachment, not really paying attention to the provider’s technique or anything like that but I was thinking about the entry point for bisexual men.
Some guys, when they’ve been bitten by the bisexual bug, have some choices to make, namely, what does he want to experience and what form this first experience should take. A newbie can start with mutual masturbation which can take two forms: Getting together with a guy and they jerk off in front of each other or they can pull each other’s pud. Then, of course, there’s the topic of this scribble, the blow job, which I’ll come (no pun yet) back to in a moment so I can mention anal sex and it’s two forms of giving and receiving.
Getting that knob polished can appear to be a “simple” thing to do… and I can assure you that it isn’t. A lot of guys are used to having a woman buffing that dome… but when the person doing it isn’t female, yup, that can be a bit of a shock to the system. Likewise, if you’re the guy doing the sucking, well, I’ve seen guys have a “Fuck it…” moment and just dive in, just as I’ve seen guys experience a moment where what they might have thought about sucking a dick isn’t quite matching the reality that’s literally right in their face.
As I watched the clip, I was thinking about why a lot of guys chose this as an entry point and I thought about how many times I’ve heard guys wonder what it would be like to have another guy blow them and what it would be like to be the one doing the sucking. Okay, um, that men are really hyped to get their dick sucked shouldn’t surprise anyone, right? What crossed my mind – and as I headed toward my computer to start scribbling – is the perception that having a guy giving you head is somehow different from having “Judy” doing it in the backseat of the car. There are differences and beginning with the obvious one – that’s not a woman chowing down on your stuff… but when a guy says that it would be different, I’ll admit to not always being clear about how he’s defining “different,” like different as in not the traditionally accept version, different as in thumbing one’s nose at the taboo attached to this… but I’ll also admit that my perception of this is skewed because other than the person doing it and whatever skills they apply, a blow job is a blow job.
There’s a bit of trepidation taking place with that first blow job, whether you’re getting it or giving it; what’s it gonna feel like, what does it taste like, is he gonna cum in my mouth and/or am I gonna be able to cum and, hell, yeah, if I cum, is he gonna spit it out or swallow it and, of course, if he cums in my mouth, what am I gonna do with it? Am I gonna gag? Wait, is he gonna throw up on me if he gags? But before any of those things come (still no pun yet) up, there’s the biggest consideration of all: Can I let another man suck my dick and can I really suck another man’s dick?
See, if there are some folks who think that two bi guys get together and go for the gusto without giving it a single thought, I’m here today to correct your perception of this because there is a lot of thinking and even concern going on before zippers ever get pulled down and for newbies, it’s some fairly scary shit because as familiar as it might be to have your dick sucked, you somehow don’t know what’s gonna happen (yeah, sounds crazy but it’s very real) and if the act is going to be as enjoyable as one might think. I’ve seen guys chicken out at the last moment, have seen them not chicken out but struggle with being sick to their stomach as well as losing that particular battle; like I said, I’ve watched them have that “Fuck it…” moment and just frigging go for it and with varying results from being a “natural” and, yeah, getting barfed on… and, once or twice, getting barfed on while I was the one doing the sucking.
It’s not that a guy experiencing sucking and being sucked doesn’t think about these things (and some other stuff) because some dudes give themselves headaches thinking about this. On the bi guy forum, wow, there are so many men who are looking for that first experience and many of those men prefer the entry point of giving and receiving head. Many of them write that while they are so totally hyped to experience this, they’re not sure how it’s all gonna turn out and since there’s no real way for them to know this without actually experiencing it, it makes them hesitant but that also amps up their desire to suck/be sucked even more. Some guys write that they wanna do the oral thing with another guy but because they’re probably over thinking the whole thing, they say they’ll opt to start with some mutual masturbation because, again, having a man’s mouth working your dick over and/or being the one doing the work can be quite intimidating.
In my opinion, fellatio is almost a “common sense” entry point and, also in my opinion, porn does a pretty good job of putting cock sucking in a very enticing light… but, there are times when I wonder if the guys watching cock sucking via porn connect with the fact that the people they’re watching on the screen are not only “professionals” but they’re also following a script of sort and doing stuff like purposely gagging someone, doing some really furious face fucking, getting slapped in the face with the dick as well as winding up getting sperm in their eyes and other places one might not want to be spermy – go ask a woman about getting that stuff out of her hair. To this end, I still think that porn’s presentation of this can establish some bad habits in men being sucked by a guy for the first time as well as for the first-time cock sucker and since I’ve seen guys on the forum write about how much they’d love to fuck a guy’s face really hard and fast or have their mouth and throat treated like it’s a pussy, well, it kinda makes my case a little and mostly because such extreme oral play can have the reverse effect: Instead of making a guy a real fan of M2M oral sex, it can totally fuck up their perceptions of this and make it more of a mistake than the pleasure it can be.
Those of us who are fans of giving and getting head know how pleasing and intimate it can be. Skill and technique brings much to the table, as does the matter of swallowing or not doing that. In mind, the most important aspect to this particular entry point is desire; how badly do you want to experience getting buffed and how badly do you want to enjoy doing some buffing? As I’ve written so many times, the real difference is the difference between liking it and loving it and I maintain the stance that if you’re not gonna love it, why bother doing it?