If I’m still writing about cock sucking, it’s because the forum’s membership has, once more, ramped up discussions about it and it remains the number one topic of discussion.
So… one day, Cityman and I were having yet another of our conversations about this and with the rhetorical question of, “Why don’t more men get into sucking dick?” at the forefront. He’s of a mind that men can achieve a higher level of bonding with each other this way and I don’t disagree with him except to say that while male bonding is an important aspect in our development, eh, when it comes to putting mouth to cock, our intentions aren’t always that altruistic.
In some of the conversations I checked out one of the things I noticed was how a lot of guys would answer a general kind of question with what they prefer to do and, of continuing interest, what they haven’t done. Granted, everyone has an opinion about, well, everything but I’ve noticed that when there’s a guy who, at least from my perspective, is looking for information that will help him make the decision to suck a dick or to leave it alone, sometimes, the responses given, in my opinion, aren’t always all that helpful, like, a guy who has never sucked a dick will put his two cents worth in about something he’s not actually done – but he has some thoughts about it.
Which, I guess, is better than asking a question and no one responds to it.
A guy asked a question about not being able to get away from sucking dick; apparently, he’s tried to give it up but has found that he can’t – does anyone else feel the same way? Now, this is the kind of question that can pop into a guy’s mind when it dawns on him that, holy shit, I’m hooked on this dick sucking thing! For whatever reason, he feels the need to step away from it but he can’t and more than anything else, he’s really wondering if there’s something very wrong with him or if this inability to give up cock sucking is fairly normal.
The answer is yeah, it’s pretty normal and to quote – or misquote – that famous movie line, “Every time I try to get out, they pull me back in!” Or something like that. If one responds by saying something about how much they like sucking dick – or that they’ve yet to suck one, nah – not helping a whole lot.
Back to Cityman’s rhetorical question for a moment or two. We’ve opined that if the stigma against male cock sucking were to just go away, that the people who remain squeamish about this would just understand that men have always been sucking each other off (which is why it’s a taboo in the first place), then perhaps guys blowing each other would be… easier? Just par for the course? There are a lot of guys who want to suck cock and, off the top of my head, there are three reasons why they haven’t:
- They’re terribly afraid of catching something.
- They’re very concerned about the stigma landing on them and getting their head handed to them.
- Some guys are actually worried that if they do it, they’re gonna like it… and won’t be able to stop doing it.
There are probably some more reasons I can think of – and could list – but I haven’t finished drinking my coffee yet – you know how that goes, right?
One of the more difficult informational things guys have a hard time responding to is, “What is it like to suck cock?” And I’ve seen few guys actually try to explain it and I know that even I have a hard time putting it into words. And even in this, you can see guys who’ve never sucked a dick offering their opinion on what they think it would be like if they ever got around to doing it. Helpful? I guess so… but while opinion is all well and good, the voice of experience is much more helpful… but then you gotta be able to answer such a question with as much objectivity as one can manage and not allow a potential answered to be colored by one’s biases, preferences and, yeah, bad experiences.
One possible answer to Cityman’s rhetorical question could be that more men aren’t getting into cock sucking because of what we don’t know about it and an overall inability to really state the pros and cons about it. What are the benefits if all men were “allowed” to suck cock? What are the downsides? And, I think, because we tend to focus more on the downside of this than we do any positive aspects, well, it’d be difficult to convince guys that it would be a good thing to just get out there and suck some dick and let some guys suck theirs.
It’s not helpful for a guy to ask the membership if he should kinda say, “Fuck it…” and just go ahead and suck cock like he wants to… when there are a bunch of guys telling him that if he does, he’s gonna get sick and die or offering up their reasons for why they haven’t taken the plunge and sucked a dick or basically telling him that he should get an exclusive boyfriend before doing it because to pick some random guy from some app or other source is dangerous.
Going about sucking a guy’s cock for the first time – and no matter how much information you manage to obtain before the fact – is still some very scary shit. As stated time and time again, it’s not like we – men – don’t know that guys do suck each other because we do know this. We can, um, go to PornHub or some other site and see it and in some pretty outrageous ways.
And, yet, even armed with this information and being aware of the potential risks – and how to prevent them from cropping up – it’s still pretty fucking scary. And, yeah – having a guy go down on you for that first time is just as scary… and no matter how many times a guy has had a woman go down on him. The perception is that there’s some huge difference going on here when, in fact, there isn’t. We’ve had a great sense of homophobia pounded into our heads and, sheesh, if I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard a guy say he won’t do it because he’s afraid it’s going to make him gay, I’d have a fleet of Lamborghinis to speed around town in.
It’s not what we know that stops this from being a “universal and accepted” thing for men to do – it’s what we don’t know and the fact that cock sucking is more subjective than objective and, even in this, there isn’t a clear cut way to put it into words. I can look inside my head and I know exactly why I love cock sucking… and you’ve seen me trying to explain it… and I still can’t really explain it because there just aren’t any words in any language that can get the job done. So, by and large, we wind up attempting to simplify it and with whatever words we have in our verbal arsenal. Sometimes it’s helpful… and sometimes it generates more questions than answers.
The biggest deterrent is social. The angst. The stigma. I tend to agree with Cityman that if this shit didn’t exist, a lot of dicks would get sucked. If there wasn’t so much fear mongering taking place, ditto. If there wasn’t all the psychobabble and this… nutty push for men to be in a relationship before giving up their cock to be sucked, yeah, maybe – just maybe – more guys would be blowing each other. If women didn’t have such a negative view about male cock suckers, sure, more guys would be doing each other and maybe even taking the pressure off of women to do this thing.
If we had a better and more open mindset about men blowing each other, a lot of men would be happily blowing each other. Those guys who haven’t done it and by their lack of actual experience wouldn’t be offering up their mostly uninformed opinions? Oh, they’d have a much more informed opinion…
If the social angst and stigma would just hurry the fuck up and go away. It continues to amaze the daylights out of me to see how much we – men – don’t know about this… and despite what is known about it. We suck each other off. We’ve always done this and if for no other reason than it can be done. It feels good to do it and to have it done. Yes, it is risky… but it’s well-known that sex has always been risky – again, there’s a reason why sex has forever been known to be dirty and nasty.
More men would be sucking cock if the belief that we shouldn’t do this were to fade into history. For a lot of men, the problem really isn’t doing it – the problem is fighting through the long-held belief that it should never be done. It’s just not all that easy to suspend belief and to override the social conditioning that prohibits this behavior in men. Then there’s that really fucked up double standard that says if “Jean” wants to eat “Helen’s” pussy, well, okay – that’s cool since there aren’t that many men who are really that good at it and our habitual emotional disconnect can make a girl being eaten a less than pleasant thing for her to endure and as opposed to how much emotion women can bring in this.
If the stigma didn’t exist, there wouldn’t be people running around and saying that men don’t (and shouldn’t) have to do this to each other because there are plenty of women who are willing to do it which, if nothing else, is theoretically true but, yeah, not so much… and guys who suck cock know exactly why this isn’t as much of a wholesale truth as is being offered in order to keep men from going buck wild and sucking each other off like it’s going out of style.
Whether a guy is into this up to their eyeballs or are still sitting on the bench and, really, making excuses for why they’re doing the one thing they say they’ve always wanted to do, sucking dick is still a huge topic of discussion… and some of the things we talk about concerning this isn’t conducive to easing a newbie’s concerns so that he can find out what a lot of other men have discovered.
Sucking cock is fun. It’s highly erotic. “Nasty” in a good way. It can be quite addictive (no pun or play on the word intended). A lot of guys do find that once they start sucking cock, being able to stop – or to not want to do it so much – is pretty damned difficult. While one can stop themselves from doing it, there’s not much that can be done about the desire to do it; it just does not ever go away and guys who manage to not do it often find that it takes a great effort of will not to give in to the greater desire to do it and go suck a dick.
Would sucking a dick – and having a guy suck your dick – make you gay? No, not really… but you might be surprised at how many men still believe this can happen. Why are some guys so afraid that if they do it, they’re gonna like it? Because they, too, believe that it’s gonna mean that they’re really gay since “everyone knows” that only gay men suck cock.
Misinformation is the reason why more guys aren’t sucking cock and as a matter of course; fear is the reason why more guys aren’t sucking cock and as a matter of course.
Doesn’t stop cock sucking from being a much talked about thing but it’s surprising that some of the things we talk about concerning this gives a lot of guys a reason not to do it more than it encourages them to give it a try. It’s probably why I get to sit and observe guys being so… conditional about it that they’re actually making it more difficult to do the one thing they say they want to do… and do a lot of.
And I still sit back with a high degree of awe and confusion over this because I do know that it didn’t used to be this difficult for two guys to get together and suck each other’s dick… and just because it can be done and it’s a fun and satisfying thing to do.
True enough, a lot of guys won’t do it because they fear reprisals from women. Cityman asked if women would be more at ease over not being subjected to being “pressured” to suck cock and, I guess, theoretically, one would think they would be and more so when girlfriend has her own reasons why she’d rather clean a filthy toilet before sucking a guy’s dick.
The reality is very different and while there are, in fact, women who don’t have a problem with guys sucking cock, all the shit we’ve been made to believe about this has made guys who love to suck cock a lot of enemies where women are concerned. And guys who want to suck that dick are very, very concerned about this – and they should be. The fear mongering and disinformation is so bad that, wow, some women don’t understand why a guy would want to suck a dick… even when they know why they suck dick… and it’s just “impossible” that a guy – and a guy who isn’t gay – would want to do something that said woman , you know, if she wants to, would herself do.
Why aren’t more men sucking cock? Because we’re still not supposed to. It’s forbidden. Taboo. Immoral. Many of us are just too afraid to. Until all of these barriers (and many more I’ve not mentioned) are removed, a lot of dicks will continue to go unsucked by other men and those that do get sucked will continue be done under the cover of darkness and under the radar.