Today’s Bisexual Thoughts: 12 January 23, 1543 hours

I saw that the forum post on sexually frustrated men had new activity, so I took a look to see what’s up and the last few comments were about women sucking guys off and why they (a) won’t do it, (b) don’t like doing it and (c) were doing it but stopped.

One of the things I learned early on – and as usual – was that some guys would turn to other guys for a full blowjob because (a) the women they were having sex with wouldn’t do it or (b) the woman they were in a relationship fell somewhere in the first three things mentioned above. My experiences with the fairer sex and cocksucking have been interesting; some females just refused to do it and because they heard the horror stories about it and by refuse in this context, that means they weren’t going to do it for any reason as compared to those who refused to do it because they got traumatized the first time they did it and, nope, not doing that again.

Some women “confessed” to using the full blowjob as a way to get the guy. They’ve said that they’ll start out sucking a guy off but once they get them, they’d be lucky to get sucked off on his birthday or their anniversary – and if they even make it having an anniversary. Some women have said that doing it pre-relationship is a no-go or that they’re saving it for the man they’re going to marry. The “usual” reasons are:

1. It takes too long to it/for him to cum and it’s too messy
2. Not acquiring the taste, selectively or not at all
3. Tit for tat: You want your dick sucked? Eat the pussy first and… she’ll get back to you on her part of the deal. Maybe.
4. Feels there’s no longer a need or desire to
5. Guys get too rough
6. Dick too big to suck
7. They don’t have to if they don’t want to
8. Their idea of not being clean enough including being too musky

One of the things I learned going into the teenage years was that girls are funny about sucking your dick. While there were girls who’d be gung-ho to do it, they were in the minority and the majority was either afraid to do it or there would be some kind of price a guy would have to pay to get sucked off and even if they were in relationship with her and, again, many were saving this for their Mr. Right and marriage. Some girls would do it in order to preserve their virginity or to greatly lessen the chance of getting pregnant but if you were looking to get a blowjob from a girl, she might suck your dick but there was a great chance that she wasn’t going to get you off that way and instead of cumming in her mouth, you’d get jerked off instead – and don’t get that shit in her hair or anywhere else she didn’t want it.

You learned that some girls were just really funny about it. As mentioned earlier, some girls would use the full blowjob as a way to get a boyfriend but after that? He might get sucked off but in a reducing kind of way until she feels that she’s done it enough times already so there’s no need to do it again – or ever again… with this guy. Most situations get reduced to special occasions but depending on how long the relationship continues to last, even those special occasions will usually go by the wayside.

None of what I’m writing is meant to throw shade at women about this. It is whatever it’s going to be and for whatever reason applies. But, having said that, if a woman’s guy is discovered to be getting full blowjobs from men, well, first, he’s about as wrong as it gets and then the whole thing becomes all about her and how she feels about what he did… and, at least to me, not really understanding that the “main reason” why he went this route was because she wouldn’t suck him off.

I’ve sucked off a lot of men who, when asked why they want this from me (or any guy who would), many of them have said it’s because women/their woman refuses to do it either again or at all. Now, I remember a period of time where women were… adamant about being eaten and they did not mean a few token licks, either. A lot of guys were either being cheated on or wound up losing their woman because if they weren’t going to do it, there was always a guy who most definitely would and, preferably, without being asked to as well as being willing to stay down there no matter what and for as long as it takes for her to be happy with things. I’d say that there’s nothing really unusual about this and more so when a lot of guys were finding out that if he didn’t eat the pussy and do it right, they knew a woman who would… and there was nothing the guy could do or say about it unless he wanted to get his feelings hurt.

Yes, the double standard was in full effect, but it was… iffy in that if a guy went to another woman to get sucked off, that was one thing; but if a guy was doing it? Oh, fuck no! Let the fussing and fighting commence and, again, the conversation would go from being about him to being about her and even as I learned, there is no logical argument that can stand against a woman’s emotional response. I would kinda understand that, yes, they did understand why he let “Jim Bob” suck him off but, eh, not so much. “Mosts women” would not accept the logic that says if you don’t or won’t do it, someone else can and will because, um, no one else is supposed to. Ever. Shit is about to get very ugly and by the time the arguing is done, homey may or may not have a woman.

One commentor on the post asked why more women don’t like sucking a guy off and went on to state that (1) she loves doing it and can’t get enough of doing it and (2) what sucking a guy off means to her. She’s the type of woman that most guys have serious wet dreams about since this woman said that she’ll suck a guy off… just because and he doesn’t even have to ask if she would. Which is all well and good but is not how other women think and feel about it… and, again, why some guys are looking for other guys to suck them off (and other things).

Women have gained the reputation for not doing it and I’ve said it before: We – men – know that there are guys who will suck us off and without any of the hassles that women put us through. Women have the right to refuse to do it. No disputing this… but. Either a guy is just going to “live” with not being sucked off or he’s going to take matters into his own hands (so to speak) and, oddly, while they could kinda/sorta find a woman who’d be willing to suck him off, well, that would be cheating but not so much if a guy does it. Sounds weird, right? Cheating is cheating. But… boys will be boys and us sucking each other off is… a guy thing and one that a lot of women can’t make sense of because we’re not supposed to be doing that.

I’ve told women that I suck dick and they’ve gotten seriously offended and I’ve asked them, “What does this have to do with you?” and now I’m being read the riot act over what men are not supposed to do and how hurt and betrayed she feels, and I must not really care about her and especially if I want her to do something she doesn’t like doing… at all. I personally learned to not ask to be sucked off but that’s me; I learned from the experiences other guys had with this and them asking and getting kicked to the curb and even fussed at for having the nerve to even ask her to do it.

I learned that women are… conditional about sex. I… understand some stuff about why they are like most guys do not understand that females are, by default, sexual objects and guys start chasing them and begging for sex and this is a non-stop thing for them and… it gets old pretty quick and it’s not like they don’t want to have sex but guys have to work for it and even harder if they want to be sucked off and, well, it depends on a lot of stuff that is always subject to change without notice and without cause or reason. I would learn that some women… weaponize sex. It’s a way to control a guy and pretty much get him to do whatever she wants him to do and it’s always about what they’re not going to do, oh, like suck him off – unless, again, she’s of a mind that doing so will get him hooked on her and once the hook has been sunk in good, well, this is going to stop. I’ve heard women crow about doing this but, at the same time, wondering why they can’t keep a man and, yeah, why he cheated on her.

This whole blowjob thing is stupidly messy but the one thing that we know is that we can find a guy who’d give anything to suck us off and… zero conditions and other kinds of drama. Jeez, I can’t even begin to tell you how many guys have sucked my dick but I can tell you that only two of them weren’t of a mind to suck me off and that’s because they didn’t want to acquire the taste. Otherwise, unless some fucking was on the menu, we were hooked up to suck each other off… because, well, because. It is not to ever say that women are the sole reason for guys sucking each other off.

It’s just that sometimes, it is the reason and if you’ve read what I’ve written above, then you get an idea of how… convoluted this whole thing gets because, first and foremost, women don’t have to if they don’t want to and there’s no arguing their reason for not doing it… and, again, guys have two choices: Don’t get sucked off by her or find someone who will and, sometimes, that someone is a guy. I can hear the women reading this starting to sharpen their knives and… don’t. Just don’t. People want to know why we suck each other off and I’m the one who has the nerve to answer that question. And that women aren’t “always” at fault. For instance:

There are guys who will not eat pussy even if you put a gun to their head, but they want their dick sucked and finished. Now, unless the woman in question doesn’t like being eaten, um, guess what she’s not going to do unless you get to feasting on her? I mentioned “tit for tat” above but women have told me that they won’t suck a guy’s dick if he does not give 1000% to eating her pussy or, if he’s going to half-ass it, he loses or doesn’t earn the privilege of (a) having his dick sucked and/or (b) finished by allowing cum in her mouth.

I learned that some guys do not know how to get their dick sucked and what “most women” prefer they do: Just lie there and don’t even think about “helping” them. Women have told me that they’ve run into guys who watch porn and think that what they see on the screen is the way to get their dick sucked and, yeah, I know exactly what they mean because I’ve run into them, too. Some guys really don’t understand that if she’s not sucking you off, they might be the reason why she isn’t. However, it remains true that if a woman isn’t sucking a guy off, some will find someone else who will, and it might be a guy because “everyone knows” that there are guys who suck dick and swallow and by default and the only bargaining is… where to get it done. When is usually right now. As my protege has said, sometimes, the “price” he’s had to pay comes in the form of a drink, a couple of beers, or getting some tacos and as compared to how much it costs him to take a woman on a date and that’s no guarantee that sex is going to happen and if she does blow him, it is without any intent to finish him.

And accidents aren’t always forgiven, by the way.

Woman have said, “I don’t know what y’all get out of it!” and I have told them, “We get sucked off. What else is there to get out of it?” And you can accurately guess that this answer did not go over well with her. Told that we’re not supposed to do that shit; told that there are plenty of women willing to suck us, off or otherwise; getting “yelled” at when I’ve asked, “So why won’t you do it?” and, yeah, glutton for punishment but I’ve taken the punishment because, again, I have sucked off a lot of guys because of a woman’s thoughts and feelings about sucking dick and finishing the blow job with cum in her mouth and spitting it out is allowed but some guys get a little pissy about that.

And there are people who want to know why we suck each other off. It’s… not a sexuality thing but a sex thing. It doesn’t always have anything to do with being into men but very much a thing of a guy not minding that another guy is not only going to suck his dick, but the guy is also going to want the cum in his mouth so he can swallow it. And get kinda pissy if that doesn’t happen.

Having said all of this, some guys have… requirements if you want them to suck you off. I had asked my protege what a guy has to do in order for him to suck a guy off and… his list of requirements and conditions was pretty interesting but also in line with what I’ve heard a lot of other guys say. If it’s under the terms of FWB, it’s all good. But to suck a guy off just because? Eh, not so much from what I’ve been observing but that goes along with the growing angst toward casual sex – period.

Big time sighing over this one. Everyone has their own thoughts and feelings about this, and I’ve heard a lot of time, both pro and con and… it is what it is. It’s one of those things that I believe continues to drive huge wedges between men and women and one of the complications is that there are a lot of guys who want a woman to suck them off, but they really don’t understand how… not easy that really is because they wouldn’t suck a guy off even if they needed to save their life.

If you make it a problem for a woman to suck you off, guess what she’s not going to do? And that would be her idea of how the problem is defined. Up to and including her having reason to change her mind about it and she has the right to do this at any time and for any reason. It’s not that hard to understand but there are guys who… don’t get it. Guys who insist that women are supposed to always do it and saying no is never an option… but they’re wondering why women won’t suck them off. I had very much wanted to know what it was that (a) made a guy ask me for a blowjob and (b) why women weren’t getting him off like that and, yeah, you go to the source, and I had no problem asking a whole lot of women about sucking dick and what I’d be told… made sense and more so when it was some of the same stuff I would experience when sucking a guy off.

Women have one position on this; men have a very different one. Houston, we have a problem and one that is… unsolvable. There is no resolution to this, no compromises but there is recourse: Get a guy to do it. It’s not like a woman won’t suck a guy off but it… depends on some stuff and I’ve sucked guys off because women/or their woman won’t do it “on demand” and, yeah, sometimes, it’s literally a demand and if she doesn’t comply right away – that “maybe later” thing doesn’t sit well with guys who behave like this – then… someone else will be doing it when they want it done and that someone could be another guy.

But that’s becoming a lot more problematic these days. My protege gets hit maybe 100 times a day with guys wanting to suck him off and I am not exaggerating that number. And he actually rejects them all. He doesn’t have the time; doesn’t feel like being sucked off; doesn’t like how he was approached, the guy isn’t his type, the cocksucker has a really big and scary dick, so on and so forth. He says that if women were more of a mind to suck guys off, there would be less need for men to turn to other men for this and, well, idealistically, he’d be right but the reality, as always, says something really different.

I have had women tell me that they won’t suck a guy off because she doesn’t get anything out of doing it. My first wife rarely sucked me off because she knew that if she did, it was going to be a while before I would be able to fuck her and… I accepted her reasoning and, really, there was no sense or point in arguing it. A lesson learned about such a thing not being just about one person or, in context, a guy wants a woman to suck him off but what is she going to get in return because it’s not just about him and like some guys tend to think. She has to want to and chances are good that she has reasons not to – and some of those reasons might have been given to her by some other guy who made sucking him off a very unpleasant thing for her.

But if she’s not going to do it – and it’s well within her rights not to – it… baffles me why they get totally pissed or get all withdrawn when someone else does it and more so if it was a guy who did it. This isn’t a logic-based kind of thing because it’s an emotional one and if you really want to know why a woman – or your woman – isn’t sucking you off, ask her – she just might tell you if you can convince her that you’re not going rip her head off over what she has to say about it.

And, ladies, if you’re wondering why guys do this to each other or why your guy is or might be considering it, ask him and, preferably, without slicing and dicing him over what he might say. This is a conversation that should be had without emotions being involved and that’s not easy to do. I have heard guys tell their woman, “If you love me, you’ll do it…” and the kind version of their response is, “I love you, but…” and followed by every reason she has for not doing it. Some of them don’t or won’t make sense to some guys but it’s important for him to listen to them and not dismiss them out of hand or get pissy about it.

If you don’t know why a guy would want a full blowjob from a guy – or be the one giving it – um, you might want to rethink what you think you know about men and beginning with… we like having our dicks sucked and made to cum that way. I know that I do and I know I’m not the only one. The difference between myself and most guys is that… I don’t much care if it’s a woman doing it or a guy. I’ll suck a guy off… because (a) I love doing and (s) I am an oral sex fiend of the highest order. It’s sex but, like some women might do, if you keep bugging me about it or acting like I’m at your beck and call, well, guess what I won’t be doing? I do this at and for my pleasure but, then again, I’ve had more than enough experiences giving guys blowjobs to have learned the reasons why I won’t suck a guy off… and just like a lot of women wind up learning but there is a consequence for women and just like there is for men:

If you’re not going to do it, someone else will be more than happy to… and they might be the same sex as you are. Just the fact of the matter even if you are of a mind that it should not ever be the facts of the matter. I’m the guy who has given a lot of women’s men a full blowjob because… they had reason not to. I have sucked off many a guy who couldn’t come close to getting a woman to do it and one guy, believe it or not, who couldn’t get sucked off by a sex worker he was willing to pay for this. Well, that’s what he told me and I had no reason to believe or disbelief him and I did it because he was my idea of a nice guy.

I can’t wait to see how much farther the forum conversation is going to go. The biggest complaint and reason have been the women – wives or girlfriends – who are no longer interesting in having any kind of sex. That’s life. It sucks and never in a good way. Just the way it is. Now such men have choices: Get used to being celibate. Go find another woman who’d do it – but with the understanding that at some point, she’s going to stop sucking you off and… just because. Or go find one of the untold number of men who’d sell their most precious thing in order to suck you off.

It’s not just a sexuality thing – it’s a sex thing. Busting my ass about this doesn’t work – you don’t kill the messenger and I’m the messenger. Telling you what I know and have learned.