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Today’s Bisexual Thoughts:  The Allure of Cock

10 Jul

“Man, shit, there’s something going on with me and I don’t understand it.”

His voice was worried; I could hear the stress clearly and even thought that he might be ill but decided to wait a moment to get the details straight from the horse’s mouth so I replied, “You wanna talk about it?”

“I think I need to,” he said, sounding just a bit relieved – but not a whole lot more.  “But not on the phone, okay?”

“Sure, whatever you want – you wanna meet somewhere?” I asked, wondering what could be bugging him so badly that my usually loquacious associate didn’t want to talk on the phone.

“Let’s get some coffee and donuts – I’ll buy,” he said after a moment.  “Dunkin’ Donuts in ten minutes good for you?”

“I’m on my way,” I said after a glance at my watch; since I was on call, I grabbed my case with my laptops, made sure my phone and pager were fully charged, and then hopped in the car.  As I made my way to the place he wanted to meet, my mind was chugging away trying to get an idea of what had spooked him but gave up after a few seconds,more thought being that I’d be there in another two or three minutes so I’d find out then.

He arrived a minute or so after I did, shook hands in greeting, and went inside to get coffee and donuts but as I was looking for a place for us to sit, he was heading for the door, tossing a, “Follow me…” over his shoulder.  I hustled to my car and rushed to keep up with him as he tore out of the parking lot then turned right at the light – I knew where he was going; there was a park a little way up this road and, sure enough, he was turning right into the park’s entrance, zipping into a parking space, and was out of his car like it had bitten him.  I parked next to him, got out, and followed him as his walked toward a bench that sat under the shade of a huge oak tree; we sat down, took a few sips of scalding hot coffee, and I waited with barely contained patience to learn why we were here.

Then I found out.  He started out by reminding me that he and his girlfriend of five years had broken up a couple of months ago and after she had swiped his credit card and got her and “a friend” a couple of tickets to Nassau and as I remember what he’d said about that, wow, that was some ugly and very nasty shit that eventually landed her in jail for her troubles.

He was silent for a long moment as that memory washed over him and I said, “I’m thinking that’s not why we’re sitting in this park on a hot-assed day, is it?”

“No, it isn’t,” he said, his voice so low I almost couldn’t hear him despite sitting right next to him.

“Okay, so, why don’t you tell me what’s going on before my pager goes off or something?” I asked, keeping the question light and humorous even though it was obvious to me that whatever was eating at him, it was serious.  It took him a minute or so to start talking but he did…

He told me that about a month ago, he was home watching some porn and jacking off when he somehow noticed this instead of fixating on the woman being screwed, his focus was on the dick of the dude fucking her and how turned on watching the guy’s dick had gotten him; after a long pause to bite a donut and wash it down with coffee, he even admitted that he had busted a huge nut and couldn’t remember such an event ever happening like that before.

Okay, now I knew what this was about but instead of jumping to a conclusion, I really did want to hear what else he had to say.  He went on to tell me that, at first, he didn’t place any significance on that moment except being really horny and not that long removed from his relationship… but he said that over the next few days, it was like he couldn’t get that guy’s dick off of his mind; not only did he watch that particular flick a few more times, he’d even gone out and purchased some gay porn – that made me blink even though it was another piece of confirming information for what I was thinking and more so since I’d known him long enough to know that he was “as straight as a laser beam.”

As he talked about watching the gay porn – and something that, honestly, I hadn’t thought he’d even think about watching – I watched his body language as he tried to get the words out of his mouth; this was embarrassing him big time but he managed to tell me that he was having a hard time believing that watching dudes suck and fuck each other had turned him on so much.

I kinda shrugged and said that, yeah, it’s been known to happen – and then I asked him why was he telling me this.  He said, “Because you’re probably the only person I know who won’t think that I’m crazy because, uh, because – damn it – I got this urge to suck a dick!  Am I crazy?”

I told him that he wasn’t crazy and that I appreciated his confidence and trust in me to tell me this.  I told him that it’s not really all that unusual for a guy to “suddenly” have an urge to do this and that sometimes it goes away as fast as it appeared… but sometimes, it hung around and, no, I wasn’t sure why it didn’t pack up and leave.

As expected, he said that he doesn’t even like dudes like that but also said that he couldn’t deny what he was feeling, either; his next question didn’t surprise me one bit since I knew it was in the way:  “What should I do about this?”

I replied, “I dunno… what do you want to do about it?”

He countered with, “What would you do?”

A moment of truth for me – he didn’t know I was bisexual and I took some long microseconds to decide how to answer his question – and finally said, “I’d check it out.”

Of course that shocked him but he recovered quickly – I almost laughed as I thought that had I not been looking at him, I never would have seen the look on his face – and I settled in for the barrage of questions I knew was coming, well,matter his mind finished digesting my unexpected answer.

He surprised me by saying, “Wow… so I’m not crazy, am I?”

“Not in my experiences,” I said with a shrug.  Wait for it…

“So, um, have you ever…?”

“More than you’d probably believe,” I said.

He just nodded, either to my answer or to whatever was going on in his head at that moment.  His body language was relaxed, as if a great weight had been lifted from him although the erection I was acting like I didn’t notice was causing him to squirm on the bench a little.

“So, what, are you suggesting that I gotta suck a dick?” he asked.

“I’m suggesting that you need to decide for yourself if the urge to do it is real or not,” I said.

“What’s it like?”

“It can be a lot of fun most of the time,” I said, shrugging again.

“Uh, damn, dude, um, what if you’re doing it and he, you know, busts a nut?”

“That’s kinda the point of doing it,” I said with a laugh.

He blinked as if that never had occurred to him and the question I knew he was gonna ask next showed up:  “Do you swallow it?”

“Most of the time I do, sometimes I don’t… – depends on how I’m feeling,” I replied as I watched him processing all of this.

“How long…?” he began to ask and I kinda cut him off by saying, “A long time.”

It seemed that a blanket of total silence had descended on the park as we both sat there thinking, occasionally sipping on coffee that was now cold and taking bites from our donuts that had lost just a bit of their freshness.  I didn’t know what he was thinking within this odd silence but I was thinking about what his next questions might be and, yeah, giving some serious thought in the direction being asked to participate in a first-time moment.  No, I wasn’t really looking for that but I’d learned over the years to never discount it; I was also thinking about whether or not I’d agree to it – sometimes, it’s not in the other guy’s best interests to do it with anyone.

But I wasn’t gonna commit to anything unless he asked so I just sat there sipping cold coffee and watched him think and, yes, still acting as if I hadn’t noticed his erection or the wet spot on his pants just about where the head of his dick apparently was.

“You’ve given me a lot to think about,” he said.  “I thought I was losing my mind or something – shit, I thought I was turning into a gay dude!  But you said this isn’t really unusual for some guys.”

“No, it isn’t,” I said.  “This can hit a guy for a lot of reasons and sometimes out of the clear blue sky; it can be very confusing because they know they love women and pussy but getting turned on like this doesn’t make sense.  Most guys shrug it off and ignore it like it never happened… but sometimes it just sticks with a guy and can drive them to do something about it if they can.”

“I take it this ain’t the first time you’ve had this conversation,” he said with a laugh.

“Nope,” I said, laughing as well.

“Do I even wanna know how  many times you’ve, ah, broken a guy in?” he asked.

“Probably not,” I said.

“I thought so,” he said, after taking a really deep breath.  He looked at his watch just as my pager went off; I reached for my phone,media led the number being displayed and tried not to sound annoyed to hear there were two servers having issues that required my attention.

“Duty calls,” I said, standing up and stretching… and acting as if I didn’t notice him staring at my crotch.  He thanked me for taking the time to listen to him and for being honest with him.  We got into our cars, him off to wherever he had to be, me back home so I could “dial in” and get to work on the problem I was called about.

I heard from him again two weeks later when he told me that even though he had tried hard to ignore the allure of cock, he gave into it and that I was right – sucking a guy’s dick was a lot of fun even if the taste left something to be desired at times.  This time he wanted to know if it was normal for a guy to suck dick for the first time and then go crazy doing it – he confessed to have sucked eight dicks in the two weeks since we had talked that day in the park.

I assured him that this, too, was normal and that, no, how long that lasted differed from man to man.  And, yes, we did eventually do each other – but that’s another story for another time…

 
32 Comments

Posted by on 10 July 2016 in Today's Bisexual Thoughts

 

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32 responses to “Today’s Bisexual Thoughts:  The Allure of Cock

  1. Jayne

    10 July 2016 at 15:34

    Was this a close friend? From what you write, it’s not common for men to share these things so I wonder why he chose to tell you. He has to feel comfortable enough with you but from this, he didn’t know that you had any idea about being turned on by men.

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    • kdaddy23

      10 July 2016 at 15:43

      We’d known each other for about six years and he didn’t know because there was no reason for him to know I was bi until the subject came up and since it did, I had no problem letting him know, which did ease his concerns a lot.

      Just as women do, us guys talk about all kinds of stuff and the longer we’ve been friends, the more stuff we talk about – and we can be worst gossips than women can be!

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      • Jayne

        10 July 2016 at 18:19

        That’s nice to hear and how fitting ( I don’t know what word to use ) lucky it was that he was able to talk to you about this.

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      • kdaddy23

        10 July 2016 at 18:21

        I’d say he inadvertently did what I tell people: If you wanna know about bisexuality, ask a bisexual.

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      • Jayne

        10 July 2016 at 18:35

        Yes, but he didn’t know at that time that you were bi. I’m not sure what my question really is but because you bring up these things I never had to deal with, I wonder why he was so disturbed about watching the man in the movie. Was he fighting his attraction because he thought it was wrong. That sounds stupid because he had to think something negative about it to be so disturbed. Was it just fear of the unknown. Regardless though, to be disturbed, it (“it” being an attraction to men in some way” must have been something already within him, no?
        I’m thinking of myself in that IF I was attracted to women at some point, I would have thoughts wondering about my sexuality but I don’t have any type of damning thoughts or negative judgements so I don’t think I would be freaked out. I can only guess that I’d approach it more from a curious, nervous state rather than disturbed.

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      • kdaddy23

        10 July 2016 at 18:44

        Such things tend to freak most guys out and, usually, they stay freaked out because if they tell someone, they might wind up getting the gay label slapped on them, which for some guys is an insult and fighting words.

        But since he could talk to me about different ways to eat his lady’s pussy, he knew he could talk to me without getting any grief. Yeah, he got hit with something he didn’t know about me but I’d figured he’d take it in stride and he did.

        When you’re feeling this, you somehow think that your the only one this happens to – I’ve never figured out why – so for him it was a relief to know that he really wasn’t the only guy with an urge to suck dick.

        Now I’ve had this conversation with a lot of guys and they don’t know that I’m bi because I knew they couldn’t deal with that information. Sure, they’d talk about it because I’m cool like that and I’m kinda smart and, yes, it’s hard not to laugh when thinking, “If only they knew how I really know this…!”

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      • Jayne

        10 July 2016 at 18:53

        Is it only “the urge to suck dick” or is it an attraction to be close to a man AND suck his dick? I ask because you know the stereotype of men – it’s about sex not emotion. btw Some stereotypes are true because they’re true, just not across the board true

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      • kdaddy23

        10 July 2016 at 22:01

        Depends on the guy. For some of us, the guy could be attractive as hell or uglier than the original sin and the only thing that matters is his cock; some of us do get that physical attraction to, say, the hunky jock type with the big dick and if you get close to him, you get close to the dick.

        It’s not always a romantic response; most of the time, it’s purely a sexual one and as I’ve said on occasion, I don’t know too many guys who haven’t, at least once, wondered what it would be like to have some kind of sex with another guy. But you can’t really diss the emotional reaction either and many guys have learned to mask that reaction since, these days, it’s now quite manly to want sex from a guy and maintain that air of machismo that’s expected of us.

        Yes, the stereotypes are only partly true but they assume that all bi guys behave in the exact same way for the exact same reasons, i.e., we just want the sex and people who still believe this obviously don’t know shit about bisexual men. As I wrote the other day, there’s a bi guy who wants a relationship with a guy and not just casual sex – but he’s not saying the sex is bad but he’s like most people in that he believes the only good sex is relationship sex.

        It sounds crazy that a guy who’s been straight all of his to suddenly crave dick – but I know that the emotional duress one can suffer after a tragic breakup can trigger it; you’re despondent, alone, horribly horny and so far removed from the dating scene that you actually have to think about how to date. So no date, no pussy, it’s monkey spanking time, crank up the porn for some tried and true visual stimulation…

        And get stimulated in a way you’d never think was possible. I’ve personally seen this happen to a lot of guys (and been the one to initiate a lot of them). Some guys have been curious about it for X-amount of time but never had a reason to explore it until it somehow gets triggered – many also blame it on the alcohol, which is a CNS depressant, meaning it can unlock inhibitions.

        Whether it’s the guy a dude can infatuated with or just his dick (or ass) isn’t consistent among us. Even I don’t look for an emotional attachment but I will never say it couldn’t happen, not after I’d fallen in love with a guy once. But a hard dick represents sex and seeing one could unlock something you didn’t know you had locked up.

        I even know women who have said there is nothing another woman can do form them in bed – then wind up in bed with another woman and find out that, ahem, there is something that can be done and better than most men could ever do.

        No one really understands the triggering mechanism since some guys never get triggered, some get triggered early in life, some get triggered but ignore it, and some when they’re much older and the focus of that trigger can also vary but what is true that no matter the motivation, it’s about playing with dick in some way.

        My associate got fixated on sucking dick; some guys get fixated on being screwed, some on doing the screwing, some on mutual masturbation, being dominate, being very submissive – the list goes on and on.

        Why? Because despite what we’ve all been taught about this and all the social stigma, it makes sense and, yes, it’s still sex and you know much we love sex (well, most of us).

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      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 03:12

        Pretty much – the same as others. The more info there is, the more things stay the same. Thank you

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      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 11:26

        They only appear to stay the same; we – society – look at gay men and ascribe those motivations to bi men and, again, some of it is applicable, some of it isn’t because, what is true is that the devil is in the details… and few people are interested in the details.

        It’s easier to view this from what we do than to bother to find out WHY we do it and it doesn’t help that a lot of bi guys either can’t or won’t explain why because the stigma, while lessening, is still powerful.

        But sometimes we do talk to each other to get answers, like the guy who contacted me late last night and said that he’s been wanting to suck dick for the last seven months, has been afraid to do it, but now feels more confident and better about himself because of what I’ve been writing.

        Bisexuality is physical, emotional, or both but what we usually see are men embracing the physical and not so much the emotional – but without giving any thought to the emotional processes that will either have a guy giving his friend some head or will prevent him from doing it.

        Why? Because our society is still so juvenile that they believe that a man who has feelings for other men is homosexual – and bisexuals aren’t homosexuals – so guys will convince themselves that their interest in men is purely sexual… even though if you talk to such guys, you’ll hear them talk about attraction and how important this is (and how necessary it is) but will still tell you that they’re “not into men like that” because bi men are expected to have the same affinity for men that gay men have.

        All of this and much more makes male bisexuality damned complicated yet it really isn’t if you can understand why. Is this different from what bi women experience? Yes… and no, partially because the motivations aren’t exactly the same – but why would they be?

        Let’s say you had a moment like my associate did; you’re watching some old fashioned straight porn and you suddenly find yourself focused on the guy eating the gal’s pussy and something inside you suddenly says, “We should do this!”

        How would you react? What would get you on a trim hunt… and what would stop you dead in your tracks even though every fiber of your being is still screaming at you to do this? Could you convince yourself to give it a try? If so, what conditions would you set that, for you, would be ideal ones? If you tell yourself, “Oh, hell, no! I love dick too much!” what would make you not do something your mind and body are telling you should be done?

        And how you’d answer these things speak volumes, Jayne, and more so if you say that you’d never do such a thing. Think about it and if you wanna answer these questions, fine but if you don’t, you don’t have to but you’re smart and I’m guessing you’ll have a better understanding of what we’ve been talking about…

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      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 12:23

        First, I have to say that I’m …more likely to be confused by, uncomfortable with, the divisive types of categories and natures that you place different men in. I don’t mean that I’m bothered necessarily but to think in so many types of outlooks stays divisive when I just don’t like thinking that way with people. We’re so similar and how we all want/need to get off is our own business. I have always likened asking people if they’re gay is like asking a straight person if they like anal – it’s none of anyobody’s business – unless you’re the other person in bed. Behave as a good person, respecting others and live your life. Sexuality is personal so handle it as you will. Figure it out for yourself and do what you need to do and enjoy yourself and hopefully you are lucky to find someone who enjoys what you do.
        I do get that your blog is educational on a personal level so you will have those “details” from every type of situation and sexual awakening. I understand the details of categories being important in discussions.
        All of that said, I believe people need to have a good grip on themselves ; ) and knowing your own sexuality is critical to accepting and enjoying yourselfI.
        If I was drawn to a woman, the situation would have to evolve in some organic way to be sexual. If there was a woman who I was attracted to, I would most likely hang around her to see what feelings I had – what the feelings were and I’d see if they passed or if they became stronger while seeing if they were reciprocated. I’d ask myself if it was only me having the feelings? Is it something with both of us? Then I would let nature take its course and go with the flow. Remember though that I don’t have learned condemnation of homosexuality wagging it’s finger at me nor do I have a family that speaks in those terms and to top that subject off, I think that my life is mine to do what I will with and I believe the same for others – just respect the right for others to live while respecting basic rules of society that keep us safe. Treat each other that way so I can live that way.

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      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 13:28

        It is confusing; it’s not easy to think about people being that different and it is easier to just simply our perceptions and then as narrowly as possible because this is a lot to think about, well, until you find yourself in the situation and now you’re trying to figure out why you have an urge to change horses in the middle of the stream.

        Fact: Bisexuality isn’t as homogenous as it appears to be… but heterosexuality and homosexuality aren’t either. Easier to think that they are but you wind up missing the reality of human sexuality and it’s a reality that our morality insists doesn’t and shouldn’t exist.

        Yet, it does, doesn’t it?

        I’m bisexual (duh, right?) and I had to understand this about myself so as I experienced things, I not only learned about myself but other male bisexuals which totally shattered that “you’re all the same” crap we hear about – we are not all the same, not precisely; we all don’t do the same things, let alone for the same reasons – again, the devil is always in the details but, ah, who wants to be bothered with that?

        No one does… until or unless it happens to them. It’s simple, Jayne – if it were to land on you, wouldn’t you want to know why it did? I mentor guys (and sometimes gals), not in how to have the sex (that’s easy by comparison) but in understanding, as best they can, WHY they’re feeling like this and more so if they got slammed with this after many years of being heterosexual.

        Now, I read your answer to my questions – and thank you for answering – and I noticed that you spoke to the conditions and how things would have to evolve… but did you think of why you could find yourself considering this evolution? Did you notice the form in which that evolution would have to take place? Attraction, feelings, and reciprocation, which is a formula we innately use for things personal and sexual.

        All of this is justification for any potential action on those feelings… but, uh, what got you feeling like that in the first place? It could be latency; you’ve always felt this way but social conditioning has been overlaid or the latency is submerged at the subconscious level and waiting to be triggered by an event, like emotional lability, sexual frustration/desperation, having your inhibitions removed, and even feeling dissatisfied with playing by the rules and wondering what else can be done to get what one needs to be.

        You ever wonder why you’re heterosexual? Probably not, huh? You just accept that you are… until that reality gets questioned, oh, like, all of a sudden and for no explainable reason, you have a desire to suck a woman’s nipples. Doesn’t matter if some chick will actually let you do it (at the exact moment this hits you) but that desire is there just the same. Everything you know says you should never want to do this and you’ve probably convinced yourself that there is no way you’d ever want to do this, that it isn’t even possible. You did, in fact, establish conditions, didn’t you? You do not have to answer but I’ll ask again – exactly what made you feel this way in the first place?

        Confusing? Yep – when you have to question the reality you thought you knew, it is confusing. What one does or doesn’t do about this is important but what gets people into trouble with this is they try to do something about this while not understanding why they wanna do (or not do) something. If you wanted to understand it, you could IF you wanted to be bothered with the details and, again, most people don’t. It’s simpler to homogenize the whole thing, to mix fact with fiction and then accept that this is the only reasonable and logical explanation why a guy would want to suck dick and then want to have sex with a woman (and vice versa).

        Fact: It isn’t and I know that and, yes, I do try to educate interested parties. Forget what you think you know and look for where the reality lives; if you can do that, this isn’t all that confusing. But if you can’t…

        Are we having fun yet? I am and I once again thank you for your valuable input!

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      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:02

        Let me tell you something I think you already know. I can over think like a mad person. It’s a dangerous endeavor when the subject is personal and tied in to the heart. I think this subject of sexuality is just that and like you said, the devil IS IN the details. I have thought about things in the ways you speak of to a certain degree. ie Why am I NOT gay, bi, questioning, asexual? I’ve wondered but at some point, it is what it is. There wasn’t a lingering unanswered thought because there wasn’t. If I had lingering questions, I would have to move in that direction until I found answers. Questioning and discerning has to be done by the person having the questions and that person has to be the one to understand their own selves at a deep level – in pretty much everything they do. It doesn’t HAVE to be shattering but if it is, work through it the way a gold miner does. swirl matters around , let go of what isn’t valued until you have gold – if you have gold. Sometimes you do, sometimes you don’t. I have to say though that I don’t care what society says about me. I care what I feel about me. I’m NOT living my life according to those rules because on my deathbed, no one but me will have reasons and answers for my life.
        I wouldn’t be disturbed by a sudden attraction. I would be surprised, but on some level I would have some sort of understanding because I keep in touch with my feelings – sexual and all as best as I can. I don’t follow along and go along with life because it’s WHAT I’M SUPPOSED TO DO. Fuck that – well except for the parenting aspects but if I were to be attracted to a woman, I’d have to get through that as a parent and my kids would have to come to learn that Mom is attracted to a woman and that’s the fact of it. If it were something I felt serious about, then I would have to bear the costs. Serious is serious and sexuality, if it’s respected as an important part of you, is serious so it should be treated as such. I would bet that my kids would know that I will follow what I need to follow as already know this about me thus far though and they’re young adults. I think the key is having perspective on yourself. What do you think of that?

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      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 14:38

        No lingering, unanswered questions but what if one came up? Yes, you’d be able to accept it but even you admit you’d be surprised – and almost everyone is if/when they get slapped by this.

        The point is that this does happen to people and more than is admitted to; thus, the thing that I feel must be addressed isn’t around what or how – it’s why, that thing at the root of us that either stays dormant or can wake up seemingly out of nowhere.

        Overthinking this? Maybe… but I question the reality we’re told to accept. Yes, we do tend to overly complicate things, to make mountains out of mole hills and we do the same thing with sexuality because it’s easier; you’re either straight or gay but can’t be both.

        And we accept this even though it’s obviously not true. We might even admit that this is true… but say it would never happen to me, uh-uh, no freaking way… then it happens. You know the what of it… but would you know the why of it? Maybe I’m just weird but I wanna know why and so do a lot of people who find that they suddenly have a need to know why.

        I write this to illustrate that the why of it isn’t one size fits all, that there are a lot of things that can happen that can can explain that “What the fuck was that?” moment that can strike without warning any time and for no reason that instantly makes sense.

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      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 14:03

        It all sounds divisive and makes many uncomfortable and I think that it’s because we never want to concern ourselves with the details, how we – bisexuals – are the same but not really. People hate the bisexual label without understanding why they hate it and it’s not for what it really is – it’s what it implies and why some modern bisexuals say it’s hearts, not parts and why this can and should only be done under the auspices of a relationship.

        I’m here to tell everyone that this isn’t the whole truth of it, that while hearts can play into this, it doesn’t always because for many, it is about the parts and all the fun one can have with them. We – humans – learned a very long time ago that good see is where you find it, even if you find it with someone who is physically like you (at the very least). Reciprocation is all nice and fair but not every bisexual requires it and the why of it is, again, in those divisive and uncomfortable details that confuses and perplexes.

        Attraction is also nice… but not always necessary… and what does that supposed to mean anyway? I know what people say about this but does it reflect the reality that exists? It doesn’t. Feelings are important… but lust is a feeling, isn’t it?

        Ask yourself this: If you met “Cindy” and you both felt an immediate and lusty connection, would you go to bed with her and just based on that shared lust? I’m thinking you wouldn’t, no more than “Carl” would if meeting “Eddie” and they felt that same connection.

        Think about why you wouldn’t and then think that bisexuals don’t think like that.

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      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:26

        Well now – I’m speaking for me at this particular place in time. Would I go to bed with Cindy if the situation was conducive and I didn’t think she was a trainwreck or a psychotic woman or a very needy woman??? Maybe and I say that because I’d be curious to having these feelings and if they were strong enough. You’re making me feel as if I am not as caught up in reasons as I think I am simply because I wouldn’t be dissecting my thoughts as you seem to be doing and I usually do think about things in my life with that level of detail but to a point of some action. Nothing happens BUT thinking until I take action. After that, I have to stop thinking.
        I think I’m out of my element on this topic though because I don’t have experience. What I do have experience with is doing what I believe that can and will cause disharmony with people I love. (divorcing) I couldn’t go along living without the possibility of love and affection in the way I needed. Determination to have that has to be similar to having the sex you want to have, under whatever label you want to carry. : ) Thank you for the drink.

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 14:47

        Again, your response is expectedly and even predictably conditional on whether you would ravish each other or not – if, then, else. What you didn’t question – what many do not question is WHY that lusty connection happened in the first place when it’s not supposed to happen like that – and the answer is simpler than it’s believed to be.

        See how deep the rabbit hole really is, Jayne?

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:57

        No – I didn’t question it. Feelings happen. People fall out of love, fall in love, want to fuck a stranger, want to find “the one”…it’s called being human. I would question why you may think we’re NOT supposed to have feelings spring up and bite us in the ass. To be honest, I’m a little weary of people who DON’T have these questioning times in their life -sexual or otherwise but I understand the feeling of comfort in following along and not making waves for anyone including yourself.
        As for me and my mutual lust with Cindy – I wouldn’t be questioning “Why”. I would be definitely questioning “What is this?” The why isn’t where my particular mind goes because why it’s happening is already a done deal. What is this implies my need to explore.

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 16:53

        You now understand the “basics” of this and the process that one undergoes when this lands on them like a ton of bricks outta nowhere and the need to figure out what, when, why, where, and how and if you can’t figure it out, ask someone who does know.

        Once you put the pieces together, it’s easier to understand; then it’s about acceptance of this “new” reality and then determining if you should or can do something about it. Whether one does or not is up to individual needs and, yes, any conditions that may apply because thinking and doing aren’t the same things, which tends to create yet another issue for some bisexuals.

        You wanna do it, you’re able to do it, you can even imagine what it would be like or watch some XXX-rated stuff to see it done… not the same as you’ve got a naked person before you waiting for you to do what you’ve been thinking about doing… and now, in this moment of truth, um, shit, it’s not that easy to do.

        I did ask my friend if he went for it right away when he finally did it or if he hesitated or even wanted to head for the hills – he hesitated, thought about it and said, “Fuck it…” and did it.

        See how it all works?

        Like

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 16:57

        Yep – that “Fuck it” is the end of thinking and the beginning of finding the next step.

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 16:58

        Put it all together and it becomes simpler, doesn’t it?

        Like

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 17:02

        All I know is, You have to bypass society for your own peace of mind and for your own clarity on who the hell you are, imo. That’s part of the “fuck it”

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 17:13

        Exactly and many people are finding reason to bypass those societal norms to obtain that peace of mind and just another way to get your boat floated.

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 11:27

        And you’re welcome – I didn’t forget to thank you for your input but I wanted to write all of that before I forgot it…

        Liked by 1 person

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:03

        by the way, Do they serve drinks here? : )

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 14:03

        What would you like?

        Like

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:14

        I’d like something tart and sweet with Vanilla Vodka on the rocks please.

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        11 July 2016 at 14:49

        I’m sure I could mix up something you’d find delicious and satisfying, something with a nice citrus bite but not too overwhelming…

        Like

         
      • Jayne

        11 July 2016 at 14:59

        Yes, and Thank you very much!

        Like

         
    • kdaddy23

      10 July 2016 at 15:43

      Oh, and as you should know, I’m easy to talk to!

      Like

       
      • Jayne

        10 July 2016 at 18:21

        Nah – get out – you are not. jk I had a thought during our last commenting exchange. You and I could talk the legs off of a millipede . I zoomed past “chair” and centipede.

        Like

         
      • kdaddy23

        10 July 2016 at 18:21

        Yep, we have had some great conversations!

        Like

         

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